Yes, folks, we are GOING THERE. Be prepared.
The “Can’t Hit the Broad Side of A Barn” Award: Derek and Maria Menounos for a disturbing inability to high five…or kiss on the mouth…on the first try.
Heidi: I’ve read that these two have amazing chemistry…but what is the deal with their timing? The other night in the confessional wasn’t the first time they’ve had a “swing and a miss” when it comes to celebrating. And Damn, the first time Derek actually goes for a kiss during a dance and she arches her back so he grazes her…chin. At least she made up for it in the end, but dang. If it weren’t for her boyfriend I would start to think they were made for each other with the crazy assed timing issue. I would have to wonder if everything misses on the first try. Heh.
Courtney: Here’s the play-by-play of the kiss: Derek goes in for the kill, Maria resists, Derek ends up making out with chin, Maria changes mind, they almost get it right and then BOOM…it’s time to move on to the next step in their routine. *sigh* Sometimes in life, the timing is all wrong…and I mean that on both a small and large scale, within this context < /shipping>
The “Pssst…your costume tic is showing” Award, female: Cheryl Burke, for her affinity for loofah-inspired costuming
Courtney: Rub-a-dub-dub, Cheryl must love the tub – because seriously, I’ve never seen loofahs utilized in costuming (and so frequently!) until Cheryl started donning them in the past few seasons. Are they in case the mood to bathe & exfoliate suddenly hits her mid-dance? Who knows. But my wise little mommy made the observation that Cheryl seems to pile on the fluff & ruffles more often when she’s a bit more on the curvy side – which seems a bit counterintuitive, since they just add more bulk. If she really wanted to sleekify her frame, she should at least avoid all of these outrageous sherbet & Kool-Aid-colored ruffles and go for something black or neutral. But of course, that would be logical, and sometimes this show is anything but
Heidi: Is this her mid-life crisis showing?? What the hell? Lacey is off the show for the season so Cheryl has to pick up the gawdawful costuming slack?? And I still think blue peeps are illegal.