E Online has posted their “early predictions” for Dancing With The Stars Season 17!! You can read them below in selected categories. For fun, Heidi thought it would be cool to make our early predictions too in the same categories. You can read them below and be sure to let us know your early predictions in these categories as well in comments. Also, and on a related note, Courtney will be making her seasonal Pre-Power Rankings post soon. So, be watching out for that post too and be thinking of your rankings to post when the time comes. Lot’s of fun things coming up. Ok, read on….
First Eliminated: Bill Engvall. Though the comedian probably has quite a few fans in Middle America, we’re expect that his dance moves (or lack there of) will lead him to an early demise.
Most Dramatic: Elizabeth Berkley. We’re basically expecting a toned-down version of Showgirls. Look alive, FCC.
Biggest Surprise: Snooki. While she may be best known for grinding on guido gorilla juiceheads in the club, Snooki has a history in cheer and dance that we think will serve her well.
Winner: Bill Nye
What? We can dream, right?!
Bill Nye GIF
Real Top Three:
3. Christina Milian
2. Keyshawn Johnson
Winner: Corbin Bleau
First Eliminated: I’m going with Bill Engvall. I don’t think I’ve ever heard of this guy? Right now, I can’t see him going far. I hope I’m wrong because I want to see how well Emma Slater can teach. I was really impressed with all of her dancing appearances over the summer and she’s made me a fan.
Most Dramatic: My bet is we’re going to see Snooki turn on the dramatics and I’m not sure I’ll be able to take it if that’s the case. Like above, I hope I’m wrong because, like with Emma, I’m curious to see how well Sasha will do as a teacher and choreographing routines for he and a celeb.
Biggest Surprise: I’ve been receiving and reading some Amber and Derek hate at twitter. Some think she’ll be a loser for Derek this time because of her weight issues. I think the haters couldn’t be more wrong. Amber is going to surprise a lot of people. She has the entertainment and likable factor in spades….not to mention the Glee Vote. With Derek working his magic and the Fox totem he is (ability to blend in with anyone), watch out! I also think Brant Daughtery might surprise a lot of people and do really well especially if Peta can pull out the tricks with him like Donald.
Winner: At first, I was going to go with Corbin Blue. All the winning elements are there. However, after watching the new ESPN interview with Keyshawn Johnson, I’m going with him instead. I think Keyshawn has the likable factor, he’s funny, and he can make people feel good. If he can dance good like other football players in the past, watch out!! I think Elizabeth Berkley could do really well if they bring on the passion and stick to technique. I also think Christina will do really good too. And like I wrote above, watch out for Amber. Right now, I think she’s the “dark horse” and will go far.
First eliminated: Seems like a lot of people are pegging Bill Engvall as the first to go – but I’m thinking he might actually last a few weeks even if he’s pretty bad, due to the popularity of Blue Collar Comedy Tour with middle-aged women of the conservative persuasion. I’m actually thinking it might be Snooki. I wonder if Snooki is going to suffer from the same “MTV Syndrome” that The Situation & Audrina suffered from, where they just had a fanbase that couldn’t really be bothered to tune in and vote. Sure, The Situation lasted a few weeks, likely based on his surprising likeability and the fact that Jersey Shore was at the height of its popularity back when he did DWTS; but now that Jersey Shore is over, are there really that many Snooki fans who are invested enough to tune in? And how much of a fanbase is Sasha going to bring with him? I think all of the celebs with new pros may be at a slight disadvantage, just due to the fact that their pros’ fanbases haven’t really been tested yet.
Most Dramatic: Ok, I confess: Showgirls is one of my top 3 guilty pleasure films (the other two being Con Air and Sister Act 2), because it’s so awesomely bad that it’s actually really fun to watch – especially if you watch it on VH1 and it’s been heavily edited to be tv-appropriate…I’m talking ridiculously toned down language (think “freak” instead of the f-word, and “crap” instead of the s-word) and CGI bras covering the many sets of bared breasts throughout the film. It’s ridiculously funny…but probably the best part is the fact that Elizabeth Berkley seemed to take that role SO SERIOUSLY even though it was borderline farcical. For that reason, I’m going to say she’s going to be this season’s most dramatic – I’m fully expecting her to go all Nomie Malone in she & Val’s paso doble. She really seemed to take on a certain intensity after leaving Saved by the Bell, perhaps to try & shed the goody-goody image of Jessie Spano…her recurring role on CSI: Miami was pretty intense as well.
Biggest Surprise: I’ve been hearing a lot about Bill Nye having some previous ballroom experience (more on that later), and that he’s really excited to do the show. Also seems as though Tyne comes with really high praise from both Hough siblings, so maybe she’s just a really good teacher…for that reason, I think Bill may really pleasantly surprise people this season, much the same way Andy did last season.
Winner: I think the Corbin-Karina combo is probably going to be hard to beat – not only because I think she’s the strongest female pro and that he’s probably got the most natural talent, but because they seem to get along really well right off the bat, too. Chemistry is something that can be hard to develop, so if a couple can generate it quickly, more power to ‘em. I think Amber & Derek and Christina & Mark could probably give them quite a run for their money, though – maybe even Elizabeth & Val, too.
First Eliminated: Peta’s partner. See, I don’t even remember his name without looking. But since he’s cute I bet he makes it through at least one elimination. Cuz she’ll sex it up for sure and way too many people buy into showmances. So my real pick for first eliminated is the comedian. Unfortunately.
Most Dramatic: Totally with Courtney on this one – Elizabeth. Just based on her entrance into GMA alone. Well, that and her comically lifted face. Step away from the knife, honey. Pair her with Val and warm up your gag reflex – I don’t think he’ll be able to help himself and she won’t stop him using the ooey gooey showmance angle. I’ll be happy to be wrong.
Biggest Surprise: Honestly, I think the only people who are going to be surprised by Amber are the same stupid haters that always gloat when Derek gets someone they consider to be a guaranteed loser. Nah, I think most people expect her to do reasonably well. I think the biggest surprise is going to be a toss up between Snookie and Bill Nye Science Guy. Bill has indeed been taking swing lessons for a long time. As for Snookie, I’m already surprised by her.
Top 3: It’s going to be some combination of Corbin, Christina and Elizabeth – those that could be ringers. I think Corbin/Karina will come out on top as the winner AND the ringiest ringer of the season. Okay by me! I like a good ringer. Except when Val has one. His tendency to act superior and gloat always comes out.