PureDWTS Season 23, Week 3 – Power Rankings

Well that was possibly the most breakneck speed episode of DWTS we’ve ever witnessed – trying to watch, tweet, and take notes proved to be pretty difficult when they were moving as quickly as they were, so if these are a tad late, I apologize…I may have had to rewind and rewatch.

As much of a cluster as we predicted the face-off dances to be, on the whole I wasn’t too disappointed – my expectations were set pretty low, and tonight’s show maybe slightly exceeded them.  With the exception of a select few dances, technique seemed to be sacrificed in favor of showmanship across the board, and I really only saw 3 couples who seemed like they were 100% in-the-zone when performing…the rest seemed to eke by with varying degrees of bewilderment. It is what it is – when you’ve gotta cram 12 dances into 1 hour, you’re bound to make sacrifices somewhere.  I will say that I really enjoyed not hearing as much meaningless blathering from the judges 😀

Just to recap how voting/eliminations work this week – those who won their dance-offs are safe from elimination tomorrow; those who lost are at risk of getting eliminated. So the rankings should really only be 6 couples this week – but I do want to at least touch on the ones who won their dance-offs, so I’m gonna do things a bit differently tonight. First set of rankings is for those who are actually eligible to be eliminated – with the #6 position being the one I think  is most likely to get the boot. The second set is just a ranking of how well the winners did.  Also threw in a general ranking of the face-offs and how well/not well I think they worked out.

Couples eligible for elimination:

1.) Marilu & Derek – After watching Laurie & Val, I already knew there was no way the judges were gonna let Marilu win this one – although I will say that Marilu & Derek seemed to make better use of light and shade, and seemed to make the most of their music.  Really liked the finesse Marilu had in her lines – she was really stretching some of those arm and neck lines well, and made her more interesting to watch, for me, than Laurie.  Maybe a slight wobble here and there when moving from closed to promenade position, but overall, I liked the general staging and theme of their dance better than Laurie & Val’s – and I think anyone that had to face-off against Laurie was already kinda screwed from the get-go, but Marilu made the most of it.

2.) Terra & Sasha – I’m still really struggling with how to approach critiquing Terra, although I will say I found her dance this week to be a bit more impressive mainly because she went in and out of basic hold quite a bit more.  I actually thought their Viennese waltz was quite lovely to watch – and heartfelt, on Terra’s part – but again, I find myself thinking “Yes, she’s handling it well – but if we’re being honest, this choreography still feels pretty basic.” I’m inclined to give Terra a bit of a free pass on some of it, because she simply can’t do a lot of the large, sweeping movements that someone of average stature could, but I think Sasha probably could have thrown in a bit more in terms of turns and arm passes to make it visually more interesting. Still pleasant to watch, but as the weeks wear on, I know I’m going to want more.

3.) Babyface & Allison – Maybe my choreographic expectations have just been set very, very low for Allison, given her track record of chaotic, dubiously-non-ballroom content, but I actually thought this was one of the better jives we’ve seen from her – she seemed to hone in more on basic steps (she seems particularly fond of the simple spin these days), and even her own jive technique seems better than before (I actually found her jive technique with Andy in season 21 to be kinda amateurish).  But my complaint about Babyface remains the same: he just moves so SMALL, and with a minimum energy level.  The way he moves actually kinda reminds me of how Tommy Chong was on the floor – he always managed to stay on time and do the steps (although upon second viewing, it looks like Babyface may have gone off-time a bit towards the end), but the energy level wasn’t super high, although Tommy was still fun to watch. Babyface…is like Tommy, minus 80% of the entertainment factor.  Which stinks, because he seems like he’s got the rhythm aspect down, and actually does do the steps…just kinda small.  I’d say he’s prolly safe this week, but he’s gonna need to step his game up if he wants to avoid jeopardy in the coming weeks.

4.) Rick & Emma – Oddly enough, I actually think Rick was one of the celebs who seemed 100% on tonight, and wasn’t thrown by the frenzied pace of tonight’s show – he seemed focused, determined, and invested, and he stayed on-time the whole time, from what I could tell! This was classic Emma choreography, and reminded me of that super-simple (but still fun to watch) Lone Ranger paso doble she gave Bill back in season 17.  I actually would have given the match to him over Vanilla Ice – I thought Rick was cleaner in his technique.  But really, I don’t see Rick heading home this week, either – even though I originally predicted him as a week 3 elim.  The dude is actually kind of adorable on this show – like Vanilla, he seems so grateful to be there, and seems very invested in learning to dance; and he was like a kid on Christmas morning last week when he was called safe.  Even those who detest his politics (Heidi) seem to agree that he’s pretty darn likeable on this show – hell, I may just toss a few votes his way.

5.) Amber & Maks – If this were a normal week and all 12 couples were eligible for elimination, I’d have these two at the bottom – I think the only thing that may save them this week is that Laurie & Val are already immune from elimination, and enough Val fans may toss just enough votes Amber’s way to keep her out of the bottom.  That godawful “Booty” song, and a whole lot of twerking and non-salsa for a viewing audience that Amber already doesn’t fit in with demographically? YIKES. Clearly Maks wasn’t phased by their appearance in jeopardy last week, because this salsa seemed like it was thrown together in about an hour before rehearsals. He could have gone the more traditional route, and done a salsa more like the one we saw from Alfonso & Witney in season 19 to the same song, but he kinda went with the lowest common denominator here…not good. On top of that, Amber seemed like she was barely moving at some points. Just lots of “meh” here. I really hope Maks wakes up and stops phoning it in like he has so far, because I do like Amber, but I’m just not feeling optimistic at this point – just feels like he’s there to collect a paycheck this time around.

5.) Ryan & Cheryl – For what it’s worth, even when Cheryl has kind of a dud for a partner, she still somehow manages to make her choreography interesting – I didn’t say “impressive”, I just said “interesting” 😉 And I think that’s the route she went tonight – kept Ryan fairly stationary or only doing really basic cha-cha steps while she did most of the twirling and legwork.  I did like the song, and oddly enough, Ryan wasn’t quite as a terrible as I thought he’d be – again, expectations were low, but at a few points, I actually thought “Dang, he could actually pass for doing a decent cha-cha!” and then he’d do something weird with his arm and I’d go “Wait, nope, still kinda weird.” My gut says he’s probably run out of steam/sympathy votes, but I would not be shocked to see Amber here instead – I actually found Ryan to be more memorable this week, so he may be able to eke out another week.  Guess we’ll see.

Couples immune to elimination:

1.) Laurie & Val – Was I the only one left really, really confused about what happened in their rehearsal package? I had to rewind it because I was genuinely confused by why Laurie looked like she was in tears by the end of it – was Val getting frustrated with her, or was she mourning the fact that she’s 16 and never had a boyfriend or any “life experience” from which to draw from for her tango? The latter, by the way, has got to be one of the lamest excuses I’ve ever heard for being at a disadvantage in the tango – rumba and Argentine tango I can kinda-sorta understand, but sh*t, all you really gotta do in standard tango is keep a straight face and stay in frame. It’s not exactly a deeply emotional experience that you have to have experienced heartbreak to truly understand. So yeah – not sure what all that was about, and did anyone else catch that they were doing a *gasp* really fast tango to an EDM song??? With LASERS???!!! OMG, TOTES COPYING MERYL & MAKS’ TANGO!!! Or does that not count since Val & Maks are brothers? 😉 You know me, just gotta call out those that seem to think Meryl & Maks’ tango was the greatest thing since sliced bread and that every tango that’s followed (that has been done by someone other than Maks, Val, or Peta) has been a cheap copy. Honestly, I felt like Laurie & Val just kinda powered through this – they didn’t really use light & shade like Marilu & Derek…it just was go, go, go, DONE. But again, not surprised that she pulled out the win on this one…onto the next…

2.) Calvin & Lindsay – Calvin really seemed to knock his dance outta the park again this week – kinda thinking he may be better-suited to the ballroom dances than the Latin ones, which is unusual given he & Lindsay’s significant height difference…but I’m not complaining! I just found myself saying “Damn, this is NICE!” watching him – he didn’t seem like he was phased by anything, or nervous, or stuck in his own head…he just lived and breathed the dance, and god bless Lindsay for seeming to get him comfortable with moving BIG; so many of the tall guys on this show seem to clip their arm movements because they’re afraid of hitting someone, but Calvin followed through so nicely. Thought that the fact that he seemed to show more growth from last week to this week than Terra is probably what edged out the win for him.  Don’t think he needs it, but at least he can relax a bit tomorrow night.  I just love that dude’s smile 🙂

3.) Hinch & Sharna – Hinch does a damn good dance once again, but I think the one thing tonight that Calvin edged him out on was comfort – I felt like where Calvin looked completely at ease, Hinch…looked like he was thinking.  While his cha-cha didn’t by any means suck, I just didn’t feel like he felt as comfortable with it as his foxtrot or paso doble – and given the nature of his injury from his accident, I wonder if he might struggle a bit more with hip action than the average guy on this show.  He seemed like he was trying to stretch out his hip flexors during rehearsal, so it makes me a tad concerned about how he’s going to handle rumba, salsa, and samba further down the line. At least he has a bit of time to prepare.  Can’t say I was wild about the song, but Sharna did give him some fun choreography that he could really play well to – kinda reminded me a bit of Nick’s week 1 cha-cha back in season 21.

4.) Maureen & Artem – Very, very pleasantly surprised that Mo was able to pull this one off over Amber – I, like so many others, assumed that salsa would be right in Amber’s wheelhouse (while being completely out of Mo’s), but it seemed like this one came down the pros involved: Maks phoned it in (kinda literally, when he pulled that cell out of his pants to take a selfie mid-dance with Amber), while Artem seemed to make a concerted effort to focus on more traditional choreography, and making sure that Maureen could handle it. And Mo seemed to keep up quite nicely – she actually did have some nice hip action and didn’t get bungled up on the arm wrapping actions. Once again, Artem impresses me with his choreography, and I’m also finding myself impressed that he’s staying committed to his partnership with Mo – I was afraid we might get a repeat “clock-out” performance from him like last season with Mischa, but thankfully, that doesn’t seem to be the case so far…

5.) Jana & Gleb – And now we enter what I like to call the “pros, be thankful you’re immune, because that choreography wasn’t your best” territory – once again, Gleb has me really, really, worried, because while that jive was fun and high-energy, it also looked like an utter mess at some points between all the tricks, and just general “busy-ness”.  I felt like every dance we’ve seen from him so far has just tried to cram too much into the routine – and tonight, it seemed like Jana was getting winded at a few points.  Sorry guys, but I just have a hard time getting on the Jana bandwagon this season – a lot of you seem to love her, and she’s not BAD, but I have yet to see anything from her that screams “contender” to me, either.  So far, Calvin is doing a better job of solidifying his spot as a contender to me than Jana is – not sure if it’s the rib injury or Gleb kinda whiffing the choreography, but if I were these two…I’d be thankful for immunity this week, because I could have seen them in jeopardy if not.

6.) Vanilla & Witney – Since I heard Len call him “Vanilla”, I guess that’s the name I’m going with this season. Like Rick, I feel like Vanilla was one of the few 100% in-the-game tonight, and I find myself just loving how committed and grateful he is to be on this show – so I actually loved that he got paired up to face off against Rick, because it was the most non-confrontational face-off ever 😛 I would say Vanilla likely benefited from a more dramatic song & staging than Rick, and both lent themselves well to a bit more theatrical choreography.  That being said – V did seem to get a bit off-time at one or two spots, and I’m not sure this was choreographically the strongest we’ve seen from Witney. Seemed like they may have relied a bit more on theatrics to carry them than actual choreography & technique, so I was kinda surprised when Len picked them over Rick & Emma’s more clean, traditional paso.  But hey – I like Vanilla, so if this keeps him safe another week…I’ll take it 😎

General ranking of the face-offs:

1.) Calvin vs. Terra: Probably the most difficult of the face-offs, due to both having extreme height differences with their partners and having to do a dance in frame, and also the one that I think produced the two strongest dances. Thought Terra maybe had slightly better technique, but much simpler choreography; thought Calvin showed more growth, and gave us a more showy, artistic routine.  Court’s winner: Calvin

2.) Rick vs. Vanilla: Loved that both guys seemed really committed to their dances.  Thought Rick was simpler but cleaner; thought Vanilla was more artsy but a bit messy.  Court’s winner: Rick

3.) Hinch vs. Ryan: Just generally enjoyed both dances, and found them cool to watch, even if they weren’t the strongest we’ve seen from these two – they both seemed to give it their best shot. Court’s winner: Hinch

4.) Laurie vs. Marilu: Hard for me to call this one, because while I prefer a bit more light & shade in my tango (like Marilu had), I think Laurie was able to power through with fewer wobbles just because she got a fast song she to which she could knock out the steps quickly. Court’s winner: Marilu, despite a few wobbles

5.) Babyface vs. Jana: If you fused these two together, you probably would have had one pretty damn good jive – Babyface’s precision & musicality with Jana’s energy & showmanship. But I found myself preferring Babyface’s low-energy jive over Jana’s messy one. Court’s winner: Babyface

6.) Maureen vs. Amber: Probably the overall weakest match-up of the night, but I favor Maureen’s simplicity and basic steps over the twerking and messing around Maks was having Amber do.  Court’s winner: Maureen

So how do you guys think face-off night went? Did you like the format with less talk from the judges, and less time wasted? Share!!!