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Dancing With The Stars Cast Supports Derek Hough At The 2013 Primetime Emmy Awards (Photos, etc)

DerekHoughEmmyAwards

As previously reported, Dancing With The Stars Derek Hough won an Emmy last night for “Best Choreography”. Right before the Choreography Award was given out, he helped to choreograph and danced in a big “Luck Be A Lady/Get Lucky” production number right before it. Above you can see him pictured with Allison Holker. If you missed it, Pure Derek Hough has a video posted of it. It was spectacular to say the least and made the other performances of the night look mild in comparison.

Also, some of the other cast members of Dancing With The Stars were seen walking the Red Carpet and in the audience supporting Derek. Below you can see photos of Brooke Burke-Charvet and Carrie Ann Inaba. What do you think of these dresses?

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Bruno Tonioli was also seen. He even had tears in his eyes when they announced Derek had won. So cute!

Reactions

Derek’s friend and former Dancing With The Stars partner Maria Menounos graced the red carpet. Before the show began she was tweeting her support for Derek. I just had to post this picture being I think Maria was the best Dressed Woman of the night!!

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What a night and one we won’t soon forget!! Lots more photos and Derek Hough coverage at
Zimbio Pictures and Pure Derek Hough.

Lastly, and wrapping up this post, below are some tweets from the cast (and fellow cast members from the past) congratulating Derek after he won his Emmy!! So cute! To you Derek Hough!!!xx

Gleb_Savchenko: “Amazing job and huge congratulations to @derekhough @DancingABC”
AnnaDemidova: “@derekhough Congratulations on winning the Emmy! So amazing! You deserved it !!!”
Edyta_Sliwinska: “Congrats @derekhough for winning the Emmy! Awesome to see great talent being rewarded.”
Karina_Smirnoff: “Congratulations @derekhough on your Emmy win! Amazing!!!! Yayayayay! Looking forward to toasting with you tomorrow! Xoxo”
CorkyBallas: “So proud of my BOY DEREK HOUGH Congrats winning the EMMY, Love U Derek :) @derekhough pic.twitter.com/0822B7XVWn”
PetaMurgatroyd: “Woohoo! Huge congrats to @derekhough tonight! Well done babe”
SharnaBurgess: “Big Congratulations and love @derekhough !!! A well deserved win at the #EMMYS always love your creative brilliance. #dwts xx”
LouisVanAmstel: “@derekhough congrats on your #emmy win for outstanding choreography! So happy for you…@DancingABC #DWTS17 #DWTS”
‏@HenryByalikov: “Congrats @DerekHough on your Emmy win for Outstanding Choreography @DancingABC !! #Emmys #DWTS wooo!!”
Sasha Farber: “@derekhough Unreal man, so happy for u, congratulations you deserve it.”
IamValC: “Congrats to @derekhough !!! Well done my friend
MarkBallas: “CONGRAAAAATS! @derekhough well deserved on your big win… Thx for the shout out too, love ya brother..”

September 23, 2013 I Written By

I'm a fashion and music fan....and I have always loved dancing too of any kind. Dancing With The Stars seems to have this way of bringing all of those things together. One of my favorite dancing quotes at the moment: "No matter what, nobody can take away the dance you've already had...." ~Gleb Savchenko . For fun music and dance mixes, visit WilUnleashed Soundcloud.

DWTS12 Week 9 – The Cheesecake Awards!! (“F You!” Edition)

 Oy veh. This gets harder every week. Gawd. I’m praying for a return to some form of sanity this coming week. Maybe we should take bets on who wears what and dances how for the freestyle. I got dibs on Mark’s shorty pants and maybe some horn rimmed glasses. Either white socks or sparkly socks. I’m also thinking that maybe Maks and either Cheryl or Chelsie won DaD – if it were Mark and/or Lacey they surely would have blabbed by now. :-) Question: Did Maks fans get out the vote?? It’s not the number of fans you have, it’s how many are willing to kill themselves voting. Mark’s fans ARE willing. Are Maks?? I guess we will (maybe) see… On with the show…

Most In Need of a Flashing “Vacancy” Sign on Their Forehead: Brooke Burke

CourtneyDo I even need to touch on the whole coin toss fail? Probably not, but I’m going to anyway :-) I loved the look on Hines’ face as he muttered “Ummm…I think they actually get to pick first.” The expression was one of “God love her, she’s sweet and she’s good lookin’, but MAN, she’s clueless. I play NFL football – I’m kind of an expert on coin tosses.  I have a Ph.D in them, dammit.” Pretty sure this clip is going to be a viral sensation by the end of the week.  The second, perhaps less noticeable (but no less excusable) fail, was when Brooke was introducing Tayla Kelley, the girl with the immunodeficieny syndrome that danced with Lacey & Chelsie.  Apparentely the poor girl’s name was too much for Brooke to handle, because she definitely (noticeably) paused to look down at her cue card before announcing her name.  *sigh* FAIL.

Heidi: Oh, lord, now who’s psychic?? That’s nearly exactly what I was thinking watching it. Hines had this, “Ummmm…how do I break this to her…” look on his face. If there is anyone there who’s going to know the difference between heads and tails (regardless of the head), it’s Hines. As for her blanking on Tayla’s name – gun shy?? If only she hadn’t been so glaringly obvious with the note check. Geez.

The “Mama Didn’t Raise No Fool” Award: Warren Sapp

Courtney: Warren Sapp is no dummy – even he can see right through the nonsense that is the 15 point “winner take all” cha-cha.  Which is why I found it deeply satisfying that he chose to mention it (and by extension, chastise it) on the special freestyle hour prior to the results show.  I believe his words were something like “I didn’t have this 15 points y’all throwin’ around!” You know you’ve made a bad, bad decision when a contestant from 5 SEASONS AGO makes a point of mentioning it, LIVE, when he’s supposed to be chatting about his freestyle.  And Conrad, I’d take heed – Warren’s a pretty big guy.  He could probably cause grave bodily harm just by sitting on you.  You best not be the object of his ire. He’s like Madea or something – he’ll injure you AND make you feel guilty for being bad.  And be hysterically funny while he’s at it :-)

Heidi: He said, “I had to work for my second place” which literally had me on the damn floor laughing. Pretty much summed it up, big guy. But he did seem rather annoyed by it. I have a feeling this won’t be the last “I had to work for it…” comment out of former contestants.

Understatement of the Century Award: Brooke Burke for her whiny immitation of a large chuck of the DWTS Audience “I miss Derek.”

Heidi: Smartest thing you’ve said in a long, long time, sister. And you don’t realize how much until you see his freestyle with Brooke, which was likely his best, IMO. Damn, I miss him. At least with all the crap they’re throwing into this show I would have something pretty to look at if he was around. :-) Not to mention, great dancing. If only he could tweet worth a damn. Then at least I would see more pictures from his set.

Courtney: One of the things I hate most about Brooke is that even when she’s being honest & is speaking from her own heart & mind, she sounds scripted.  That’s what I thought about this – that maybe the folks feeding her lines up in the control booth were like “Tell everyone how much you miss Derek!” in an effort to draw the guy back to the show next season, despite the 3-ring circus it’s been this season.  So of course, she throws out a fakey-sounding “I miss Derek!!!” that just makes me think that she had nothing better to say, even if she really did mean it. As for Derek - honey, run for the hills – or be prepared to throw your weight around to get some changes made.  Grab Conrad by the (proverbial) balls and demand that he bury this damned “winner take all” dance forever, and that the judges get sent to rehab over the summer.  And maybe demand that Mark’s sparkly sock & flood pants budget be cut – that way he’s forced to dress normally, like the rest of the male pros :-)

Heidi: I think you have identified part of the problem. When Derek is around he DOES ask Mark what the hell he’s wearing and asks him if he’s crazy…and makes fun of him. Apparently that had a much bigger impact on Mark than we previously realized. :-D

Award for Pro Most Likely to be Suffering from a Head Injury: Mark Ballas “The freestyle is the time to go out of the box”.

Heidi: Um…Mark? Were you dropped on your head?? As my friend Dee so eloquently screamed on Twitter, “He’s been out of the box half the season!!!!”

Courtney: *shaking my head* If he thinks he’s been IN the box all season, then I am dreading to see him really & truly “out of the box”.  Can’t wait to see what that entails – Russian folk dancing? Pole dancing? A giant squid costume? Midgets on rollerskates? :-) In all seriousness though – freestyles that have been “out of the box” have generally not fared so well on the show.  I daresay going against the grain didn’t work for Marie & Jonathan and Erin & Maks. Like it or not, there is a certain formula that seems to always work for freestyles on this show: high-energy & upbeat, with eye-catching tricks, and a good, collaborative effort by both members of the partnership.   If Mark is planning on going against that golden formula (which has won him two MBT’s in the past, mind you), he could be setting he & Chelsea up for failure.  Now is definitely NOT the time to go slow, edgy, or bizarre.

Heidi: You’re right, of course, now that I think on it more. None of Derek’s nor Mark’s previous freestyles were what I would call “out of the box”. None of Kym’s either. I wouldn’t even really call Julianne’s terribly risky or outrageous. But they were all upbeat, high energy with good music.

Stupidest Producer Idea BESIDES the BonASS Dance, Week 9: Play by Play during the freestyles.

Heidi: I love Warren and all, but I really wanted him to shut the hell up so I could watch the dance again in peace. And do I even need to comment on the massive ego that is Donny Osmond? Dude, your Vegas show is re-opening…MOVE ON. Amazingly enough, the only one that worked was Brooke, because she wanted to watch her dance with Derek again as much as I did! Which of course, makes me think of the next award…

Courtney: I actually got kind of a kick out of Warren giving his commentary – it was done in a rather tongue-in-cheek fashion, where you could probably tell that Warren felt silly doing it and just decided to run with it :-) I was half expecting him to bust out with a “Boom goes the dynamite!” or “Whammy!” mid-commentary.  Donny – just, no.  Nuff said. Move on.  Apollo – zzzzzzzz.  Brooke – meh.  Was nice to see her unscripted, but it still smacked of cluelessness. 

Heidi: Apollo was on there?? Oh yeah, I have a vague recollection of saying “Apollo = Cute” on twitter before I took a bit of a nap. :-)

Best Freudian Slip, Possibly in the History of DWTS: Tom Bergeron, for (paraphrasing), “there’s where you needed the breast implant” when talking to Brooke during her Freestyle

Heidi: I would have to watch it again to get his exact wording, but I actually guffawed again when he said it. Totally Freudian and props to Brooke for rolling with it and snarkily correcting him. “That’s breast PAD, Tom.” Best work on DWTS she’s done since she did that Freestyle, probably. :-)

Courtney: Somewhat off-topic, but aren’t Brooke’s fake? And isn’t it kind of common knowledge? Cause the way she reacted, she made it seem like Tom was outing her as part of the Fake Boobie Brigade or something.  I could totally see her pulling Tom aside during the break and saying “How could you??!! Now EVERYONE’s gonna know my boobs are fake and I’m gonna be the laughing stock of this show!!!” No worries, Brookie – you’ve been the laughing stock for awhile now.  It’s nothing new :-)

Worst (Best???) Fashion Accessory, Week 9: Ralph Macchio’s “butt booster”; Honorable Mention: Brooke Burke’s “Boobie Butt”

Heidi: I confess I don’t know whether Ralph’s butt booster is “best” or worst because, while hilarious, it was kinda sad that you couldn’t be sure he was actually wearing a faux butt. Because, the man has no butt. Poor baby. Butt (heh) there to take all the spirit of fun out of it was Bruno the asshole and his diaper comment. Bruno, here’s a thought – put a diaper over your face and spare us your vile commentary, you little troll. Speaking of no butt – I only point out Brooke’s butt padding because it lead to one of the great Freudian slips of all time. :-)

Courtney: As one of the many Americans suffering from WGB Syndrome (white girl booty syndrome), I feel Ralph’s pain.  I myself have been forced to resort to “enhancements” just to fill out certain outfits on a few occasions – sucks that a lot of the clothing manufacturers don’t cater to the gluteally-deficient :-( And for those of you who follow me on Twitter, I’m sure you’ve seen me bemoaning the fact that the photographer definitely photoshopped my butt in my most recent photo shoot *sniff*.  But yeah, I digress – Bruno is a sleazebag and I could make a million & one distasteful jokes about his hindquarters and what he does with them…but I’m not gonna stoop that low.  :-) I gotta give Ralph props for playing along a bit and giving Bruno that adorable coy expression after Bruno’s inquiry about the diaper.  When you’re dressed up like Persian gangster, complete with silky shirt & chains, and you’re gyrating your fake butt to Pitbull – it helps to have a sense of humor :-)

Weirdest Freakin’ Rant in the History of DWTS: Maks, for “Stop reacting on my negative things in a negative way because then we both negative. One of us has to be normal”

Heidi: Um…Maks? Were you dropped on your head?? Dude, you realize I had to rewind that like four times to actually transcribe that whole bizarre, yet oddly amusing diatribe?? LOL. Weirdest of all – Kirstie understood what he was saying! She ALMOST starts laughing at him and then I think she realized that it’s not nice to laugh at crazy people.

Courtney: *still scratching head* WTF did he mean? Did it get lost in translation going from Russian to English? *shaking head* Guess I’m glad that Kirstie & Maks are so in tune with one another that she understood this without any explanation. 

Brooke Burke Question so stupid and redundant that even Kirstie had Nothing: “How do you like those 9′s???

Heidi: To which Kirstie responded, “um…YAY!!!” I mean, really, the voices in Brooke’s head have GOT to shape up because this is getting ridiculous. Surely there is SOMETHING else she can ask them about. Didn’t she just ask about their 9′s last week??

Courtney: Brooke had better shape up or get out.  This is her THIRD season doing this – she should be far better at it than she is at this point.  She’s like one of those Tickle Me Elmos that only can say like, 3 phrases – and she’s not as cute as Elmo.

May 21, 2011 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS12 Week 7 – The Cheesecake Awards!!

Heidi here, again – I should change the author of the post to save myself the trouble. :-) Anyway, this would have been posted 4 hours ago except that I fell asleep while waiting for Courtney….okay, I’m kinda kidding. I did fall asleep but according to my time line, my nap coincided with her getting done.  Hey!! I busted my ass all morning long!! I cleaned out TWO closets, bagged stuff for Goodwill and made a trip to the dumpster. So there.  Anyway…on with the show…

The Salt in the Wound Award: Brooke Burke

Courtney: Everyone’s favorite flaky cohost had an uncanny way of asking questions this week that seemed to make the answerers feel like poop :-) She made sure to ask Ralph how it felt to be the old guy on Team Chelsea. She asked Romeo how it felt to be the last one picked.  She reminded Team Hines that Chelsie had referred to them as “old parents”.  Wow Brooke, you sure know how to make the contestants feel like a million bucks :-)

Heidi: Now that you mention it, I did find myself saying STFU an awful lot…

Len Goodman Creepy Old Guy Phrase O’ the Week: “And the boobie prize goes to…”

Courtney: Was I the only one that saw a moment of utter disgust on Kendra, Kirstie, & Kym’s faces when Len announced that their team had won the “Boobie Prize”? They all looked down at their ample bosoms (of which Kym’s Awesome Boobage still reigns supreme ;-)) and then looked up in horror.

Heidi:I feel dirty.

DWTS Sexual harassment Lawsuit Fodder O’ the Week: Romeo’s declaration of there being “a party in my pants…and everyone’s invited!”

Courtney: I’m sure Bruno has already RSVP’d.

Heidi: I’m sure the place will be packed.

The “You Started it!” Award, a.k.a. Payback is a Beyotch Award: The Tag Team of Len Goodman and Tom Bergeron for video of Mark confronting Len and the declaration of “I don’t know what he’s moaning about…Maybe it’s Youth”.

Heidi: Ya know, I gotta laugh at that, because when you act like a brat on this show, you have to know there will be consequences.  Last week Tom and the producers got Bruno with the Elton John video. This week was Mark’s turn - act pouty and sulky and make non-obscene gestures which everyone around you then has to explain away as a secret hand gesture between you and your father, confront Len, complain about Len – and well, gee, you have to know that there could be repercussions. :-)  Funny ones.  So, they show the “confrontation” and then Tom and Len proceed to talk about Mark. Tom essentially gives Len a platform to come back and Mark has to grin and bear it. But the VERY best part of the whole exchange was the declaration by Len: “I don’t know what he’s moaning about. Maybe it’s youth”. It made me think that perhaps Mark and Chelsea shouldn’t have excused all their varied activities (risks, etc.) on being young. :-D It might come back on you at some point. Of course, Tom had to come back with, “You don’t remember that, do you.” Great thing about Len is he can laugh when Tom makes cracks about him.

Courtney: I would be lying if I said I didn’t get a certain smug satisfaction from seeing Mark squirm uncomfortably as Tom & Len talked about him in the 3rd person :-) And yes, as “unfair” as the show may seem to some, karma always comes back to either reward or punish people – granted, it may take a season or two, but payback’s a bitch regardless…trust me, I know her personally ;-) But you’d think by now that most of these pros would be cognizant of the fact that the cameras catch EVERYTHING…and they’ll use that footage however they see fit to garner ratings.  Just like you have no room to bitch & moan if you know Len hates “edgy” and he gives you bad scores when you do “edgy”, you also can’t complain about being painted in a bad light due to the footage they choose to show of you.  Lessons to be learned in your “youth”, dear Mark…

Best Use of Chemistry (and I don’t mean drugs), Week 7: Hines and Kym for their confessional as shown on the results show.

Heidi: Seriously, what was Hines doing with another woman the other night when he and Kym are the cutest things ever? Their confessional was, once again, the cutest thing about the results show. Kym’s going on and on about how Hines “took control” of her, blah blah and he grabs her arm and yanks her toward him and she’s all “Oh hello” – was she purring? I might have. :-) Wait…is this more than you needed to know about me? ;-)

Courtney: Idk, as much flak as this is probably gonna get me, Hines is in the doghouse with me right now – not for the whole accidental run-in with the law nonsense, but because he was with some “mystery woman” and not She of the Awesome Boobage.  Seriously – if there’s anyone in the cast that I think is mere inches away from a tawdry late-night, post-rehearsal rendezvous at the Chateau Marmont, it’s these two.  Such cute, genuine chemistry between them – on the floor and off.  I am a total Hinenkym shipper.  Their cute kids would emerge from the womb ready to model for United Colors of Benetton. :-)

Best Excuse for Screwing Up a Dance, Season 7 thus far: Kirstie Ally – “I kissed you and everything’s a blur after that.”

Heidi: No wonder Maks loves her – who wouldn’t love a constant ego boost. :-) And she’s just so dang funny about it while seeming as straight forward as you can get. It’s quite endearing.

Courtney: Kirstie, you wise & wily little minx – you know quite well that flattery will get you everywhere when it comes to a certain virile, macho Russian.  And you know that comedy will get you everywhere with the audience – only you would be able to turn kissing & bad juju into acceptable excuses for poor performances. :-)

Award For Open Mic Moment That Was Most Reminiscent of a Porn Movie: Karina (and Ralph)

Heidi: Um, not that I watch porn. No siree, not me. Ahem. Anyway, when they replay parts of the dance with the mics open on the couple, Karina *squeals* when Ralph drags her over the bar, then you hear a lot of heavy breathing, then Ralph says, “You Okay” and Karina pants “Yes”. Come ON!! That is so porno. No wonder I love Ralph. ;-) Is this too much about me again? :-)

Courtney: Ahem.  Well, those of you that follow me on Twitter know that I am quite openly a fan of “adult films”.  But we’ll leave that at that for now.  Anywho! If Stevie Wonder had been watching-er, LISTENING to the show, he may have gotten the wrong idea, based on the exchange that was heard following the 2nd “fall heard round the world”.  Oh Ralphie, you stud you – you and that fire down below! :-P

Award for Stupidest Time Filler in the History (probably, so far) of the Show: Pros and their Celebs, One on One

Heidi: CUT THE SHOW TO AN HOUR. Please. I beg you. Don’t feed me any more crap like this craptastic crap-fest. Okay, now that I’ve gotten that off my chest, the next two awards will be birthed from the crapfest, so while I beg you to STOP the f@#king melodrama, I also have to say thank you. :-)

Courtney: Dumb, scripted poppycock. I was waiting for a suitcase of cash and some drugs to exchange hands…or the Feds to burst in or something.  I was disappointed. :-(

Award for Best Rejection in the Stupidest Time Filler in History: Maksim Chmerkovskiy for his response to Kirstie Alley’s long winded request of what she needs for a good partnership followed by: “Deal?” Maks: “Probably not”.

Heidi: I got the feeling that Maks also thought it was the stupidest time filler in the history of the show. :-) When it’s Kirstie and Maks, he can say shit like this and make it the most endearing and funny thing ever. Context is everything.

Courtney: As I said previously in the season, I think these two were the first to really realize what a f*cking joke the show can be sometimes – and their brand of “playing along” involves some very tongue-in-cheek exchanges. This was no exception :-) I’m interested to see what kind of humor they bring to the table as the finale approaches…because we all know the amount of nonsense we’re made to sit through is directly proportional to how far along we are in the competition.  Yay.

Award for Best Ridicule of the Stupidest Time Filler in History: Tom Bergeron for “We had to kick out a poker tournament and 3 psychics to get that space!!”

Heidi: BURN. Well done, Tommy B. :-)

Courtney: Bah, I think Tom’s prolly exaggerating – Miss Cleo got shut down how many years ago? That room was probably bank-owned and sitting abandoned in a warehouse in Fresno -  I bet the location scout tasked with procuring a space for that bit nabbed it for pennies on the dollar and blew the rest of his budget on Cuervo. :-)

Tom Bergeron Line O’the Night: “Romeo has found that you’re never too imperiled to plug.” Honorable Mention: “The audience is all calmed down now that I’ve blamed everything on the producers.”

Heidi: Tom finally addressed what everyone noticed a while ago – that Romeo works this show like the media tool it was meant to be. :-) LOL. And then Tom sneaks in another dig at who REALLY makes him put people in jeopardy (and who are responsible for Pia pimpage, stupidest time filler in the history of the show, craptastic songs that don’t go with the dances they’re being used for, etc.) – those pesky producers. Tom was back in fine form after a week where everything (and not just him) seemed a bit forced.

Courtney: Hey, can’t blame the kid – if elimination is likely immenint, you may as well try to get people to come see you elsewhere :-) Sublimal message in Tom’s line about the producers: “Conrad Green is a turd. You will write many letters to the network demanding that he be replaced.  And you will protest outside the office of the Primetime Emmy Awards committee until they agree to fix the results of the Best Reality TV Host competition in my favor.”

Heidi: Man…EVERY year Tommy is robbed in favor of he of the massive dimples – The Probst.  Probst, sit out a season – you are massively edited to get the best results whereas Tom is LIVE every week and never misses a beat!!  The man is deserving!!

May 7, 2011 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS12 Week 5 – The Cheesecake Awards!!

Heidi here! You know, for a week that was pretty horrible in terms of themes and music, the Cheesecake wasn’t as sour as I expected. Still not as much funny as the show could provide, but what can you do? For all the griping I read on twitter, it could be far, FAR worse. :-)

I haven’t told any of my cohorts in crime this yet, but I am going out of town once again on Tuesday and will be back on Thursday evening. It should not affect Dancing by the Numbers, but it will once again push the Cheesecake Awards to Saturday at the earliest, mainly because chances are good that I won’t see the results show until I get home – and that’s where most of the cheese is. :-) Ah well, on with the show.

Most Likely to Get Slapped with a Sexual Harassment Lawsuit by Season’s End: Len & Bruno

Courtney: Len has pretty much cemented his reputation as the “creepy old guy” with such comments as “Cheryl’s showing off the Rocky Mountains!” (to which Cheryl replied “I feel violated”), and ”Yum yum, what a bum!” with regards to Chelsea’s hindquarters.  There’s been many more in previous shows this season – wish I could remember them all and then parlay it into some class action lawsuit on behalf of the cast :-P And we all know Bruno’s man parts do all the thinking for him – this week he ordered Ralph to “give him sex” and inquired about booking Maks as a private dancer, reassuring Maks he “could afford” his expensive price tag.  Um, yuck. At least Ralph had a good comeback for Bruno’s questioning of his “fire down below”: “I have 2 kids to show for my ‘fire down below’.  What about you, Bruno?” Ahhhh…touche, Daniel-san :-)

Heidi: You know, I don’t even know what to make of Len’s behavior – all that from a guy who acts so disapproving towards Bruno. What is wrong with him? As for Bruno – well, for some reason I don’t have a negative reaction when he says what he says. At the risk of being ageist, I would say it could be that he’s just younger than Len, but I think it has much more to do with delivery. Let’s face it, Bruno is over the top ALL the time, it’s not a shock or a surprise from him. And you KNOW it’s a crazy “I am BRUNO” act. You can’t take that stuff seriously from him. Len, on the other hand, is serious SO much of the time that when he tries to emulate Bruno it tends to just gross one out. Speaking of…

Best Pro Line O’the Night: Cheryl Burke – “I feel violated”

Heidi: You go girl, being funny and giving an appropriate response all in one fell swoop. Len was out of line in a big way. I give her props for her reactions – yeah, it was funny but from the way she immediately covered her chest, I think she was uncomfortable as well.

Courtney: Where’s sexual harassment panda when you need him?

The “Errr…nobody saw that, did they?” Award: Cheryl, for almost falling over in the Red Room prior to her Viennese waltz with Chris; (dis)honorable mention for Lacey falling down during the pro dance to “Should’ve Been a Cowboy”, Chelsie for losing her bra during practice, & Hines for farting on Kym

Courtney: Our celebs and pros managed to turn the art of bloopers into a full-time job this week – and who can blame them, during a week that just flat-out sucked? :-) Some of you may or may not have caught it, but during the clip of Chris & Cheryl in the red room before their V. waltz, when Chris is talking about how he’ll “go crazy” (said a la Regis Philbin) if Len doesn’t give him an 8, Cheryl can be seen in the background practicing their routine.  She goes to do a ronde, loses her balance, and almost falls down.  She looks up at the camera & gets a sheepish look on her face, as if to say “You didn’t get that, did you?” The whole thing is rather adorable, really :-) And for those who didn’t catch it, Lacey just kinda fell on her butt during the Toby Keith performance. I know everyone on Twitter was blaming Maks & his “bum leg”, but I watched this one several times and it’s actually Lacey’s fault – she swings too wide when she turns to go through Maks’ legs, and as a result she falls on her butt and trips up Maks.  Another instance when there was an expression of “Maybe no one saw that…” that crept across their faces before they kept going.  Poor Chelsie - the quickstep is just not conducive to the wearing of adhesive bras (yes, per Chelsie’s Twitter it was a “sticky bra”, and not padding like everyone else is claiming).  Romeo looked like he had just seen a Yeti or something.  And Hines – take Beano before practice and there will be-no gas…don’t you watch the commercials, dude? :-)

Heidi: People were blaming Maks for that?? It was clearly Lacey’s fault – Maks saved her ass (pardon the expression) by grabbing her and throwing her back into where she needed to be for the dance. Then they had the very awkward dismount from their final pose – are these two just not in sync or what?? As for Cheryl – you are right, that was adorable. The look on her face was priceless… “you guys were not looking at me, right?” You could almost hear a “ayuk ayuk” type goofy laugh just looking at her face. :-)

Courtney: Yeah, ever since “the fall heard ’round the world” during he & Kirstie’s rumba, everyone all of a sudden blames Maks’ leg for everything.  All sorts of tweets of “OMG! Maks needs to have that leg looked at!” and “He has no business dancing injured like that! He could hurt someone!” I’m guessing it was Lacey fans that didn’t want to believe she had fouled up.  Anywho, Maks is clearly fine, and Lacey is human, folks. 

DWTS Celebrity Trend O’ the Week: Thwarting Brooke‘s stupid questions with nonsense

Courtney: I have to credit the divine Miss Kirstie Alley for starting this trend – she’s been doing it since week 1, but it looks like the other couples have caught on to its effectiveness and have started doing it as well, which has resulted in absolute hilarity and one very confused hostess :-) Whether it’s Romeo dodging a dumb question about his biggest competition by threatening to tamper with Hines’ toothpaste, or Chris commenting on Romeo’s accent instead of answering his question, or Petra musing about Maks’ “sex on a stick” monologue – it all resulted in Brooke laughing uncomfortably and not quite sure what to do :-) LOVE.

Heidi: I think Kirstie has been giving lessons, like Ms. Myagi or some such thing. “You too can distract Brooke, Daniel-san…”

Personality 180 Award: Romeo

Courtney: 2 weeks ago the boy was throwing a fit about hating dancing shoes, and now he’s merrily jumping around the dance floor like Jiminy Cricket and pulling faces like Mark :-) Good to see him move out of the shadow of his dad, the stick in the mud, and finally enjoy himself out on the floor!

Heidi: That was, IMO, the dance of the night. Awesome – and you can’t tell me that he hasn’t embraced all of “the ballroom”. Dude was having fun and you can’t fake that.

Most Lackadaisical Performance: Toby Keith singing “Should’ve Been a Cowboy” accompanied by Maks, Lacey, & the DWTS Troupe

Courtney: Was it just me, or did pretty much everyone involved in this number seem like it pained them to be there? Toby looked like he would have rather been getting a root canal than performing on the show, and all of the dancers seemed a bit ho-hum about the whole thing.  Then again, it is a bit hard to imagine what it’s like to be a cowboy if you grew up behind the Iron Curtain…

Heidi: I despise Toby Keith with a passion reserved typically for Benji Schwimmer and Ann Coulter. Not that any of those three have anything in common…well, Ann and Toby do as they are both Republican men….I mean, people. Heh. BUT, besides that – Ick. Not a fan. I think lackadaisical is his usual performance style, although I can’t be sure. Besides Toby and Lacey, though, were there any natural born Americans dancing?? It might be hard to see the appeal of the whole “country” thing if you didn’t grow up around it. Well, hell, it’s hard for me to see it and I *DID* grow up here. So I get them. :-)

 Best Celebrity Cameo on the show, EVER: John Travolta, aka the “Dance Doctor”

Courtney: “American Night” was in dire need of saving by the time Kirstie’s former co-star & Scientology bff showed up to save the day.  God bless Travolta – even this piddly little impromptu blurb for DWTS shows just what a good actor he is.  He just walked into the frame like it was no big deal, and dude didn’t miss a beat – as if to say “Yeah, I’m J-Trav, I’m way too famous for this show but I’m gonna show up anyway and thrill you all.  Capeesh?” And God bless Kirstie for making it happen – I think she is probably the only celeb in DWTS history with enough clout to bring in a celebrity guest as big as John. 

Heidi: I dunno, I think Jennifer Grey brought in Michael J. Fox and he’s a pretty iconic character – maybe moreso than Travolta, particularly now with all his work re: Parkinson’s. That said…Travolta is a gem. So hilarious – seriously brightening up a relatively disastrous performance show.

Brooke Burke Flub o’ the Week: “Choreographer”

Courtney: I can’t decide if the teleprompter was stuck or she was just so frazzled by the nonsense going on around her, but Brooke just couldn’t manage to spit this word out…much to Tom’s delight. :-)

Heidi: Her Hard Drive was acting up. Or it was a RAM problem.

Judge Most in Need of a Reality Check: Len Goodman for criticizing a Samba forced into a stupid-ass Americana Night Theme.

Heidi: Seriously Len?? Seriously? When you criticize what I thought was a cute and well executed Samba (and props to Karina for tying line dancing into a Samba) for technique when the producers inflict on the couples the stupidest theme ever done on DWTS, you’ve let your need to storyboard get in front of reality. Seriously – get a grip and go with Carrie Ann (shocker, I know!) – she had it right when she commented on the theme and how it impacts the given dances. Jerk. And this on a night when you praised Kendra. Jaysus.

Courtney: I guess Len has just decided that Ralph is going to be his permanent punching bag this season.  I can’t think of any other reason why he’s so damn grouchy every time he critiques him.  Maybe he’s jealous of how well Ralph has aged…who knows.  But yah, I definitely cursed at the TV when he praised Kendra’s non-foxtrot – just made his hatchet job of a critique of Ralph’s samba that much more hard to swallow.

The Selectively Blind as a Bat Award: Carrie Ann Innaba, for her failure to call out the biggest and most glaring lift in the history of the show…or, well, in a really long time

Heidi: Geezas – that lift at the end of Hines and Kym’s dance?? Hello? Remember a beautiful rumba by Derek and Nicole with much more technically difficult move that resulted in the same sort of carry MUCH later in the song – to the point it was actually debateable whether the music had stopped (certainly, the applause was loud enough that Derek thought it had)?? The one that you called out spoiling what was one of the better rumbas in the history of the show?? And you did that AFTER you blatantly excused a similar move by Mark and Shawn?? Among others?? Speaking of storyboarding – I guess we only call lifts when it is convenient to the story you are trying to tell. Jerk.

Courtney: I thought of the exact same thing when I saw that bit at the end – but alas, they must’ve given Hines the Marine diplomatic immunity this season, because he can do no wrong in the eyes of Carrie Ann…or Carrie Ann’s lady parts.  It just annoys me to no end how inconsistent she’s been in her “lift policing” this season – only calling couples out when it suits her interests…whatever those interests happen to be. 

The Tom Bergeron-In-Training Award for Best Impressions: Chris Jericho

Heidi: His imitation of Len is spot on scary good. He’s just hilarious and just seems so intelligent – he has a future in TV, methinks. It doesn’t hurt that he’s cute as hell. :-)

Courtney: I <3 Chris :-) And that’s saying something, because those little hearts made from the less-than sign and a 3 annoy the hell out of me most of the time! I tweeted him a proposition the other night that he and I should make gorgeous, waltzing, wrestling babies that speak in fake British accents…he hasn’t responded  yet, so he’s probably just trying to work out his schedule to make it happen before he promises anything ;-)

Heidi: He was busy just then. :::happy sigh::: ;-)

The Best Butt Crack Award: Maks Chmerkovskiy

Heidi: Hey, he may not appeal to me, physically, but I’m going to call out a nice plumber’s ass when I sees one. ;-) Laying on the floor in front of Kirstie at the end of their dance. Just sayin’. But, I also have to say that there’s a gay bar in New Orleans called “Rawhide” where Maks’ pants make a nightly appearance on half a dozen, not as well built, guys – at least. There’s a matching vest. Just something to keep in mind. :-)

Courtney: Oh wow! How did I miss this one??? Maybe I’ll have to rewatch that performance later while dying Easter eggs.  And yes, leather pants are a gay bar staple…as are assless leather chaps with nothing underneath :-) *pours one out for the biker guy in The Village People*

Tom Bergeron Line O’the Night: “I think we’ve learned that a top hat undercuts the ‘tough guy’”; Honorable Mention: “Let’s let the emotional Grand Canyon (aka Len) settle down.”

Heidi: Oh that Tom does make me laugh out loud on a regular basis. I also loved at the end of the night when he was making the cracks about the confetti and not being able to read the TelePrompTer. LOL.

Courtney: Quite possibly the only other person besides Kirstie & Maks to really acknowledge through his behavior that American Night was absolute cat crap.  I respect that :-) And as for the confetti malfunction – at least Tom was able to ad-lib his way through the remaining moments of the show.  I saw a moment of pure panic cross Brooke’s face when she realized the teleprompter was obscured. I giggled.

Best Dressed Celebrity, Female – Week 5: Petra Nemcova

Heidi: WOW!! Wow. So elegant and beautiful – everything was perfect. Hair, makeup, jewelery, dress…just gorgeous.

Courtney: Evaine has assured me that I could rock this dress well (but probably not as well as Petra), so maybe one of these days when I’m flush with cash and my job is just to be fabulous all day, I will purchase this dress and act out one of my bucket list fantasies: wearing this dress in a casino.  And then when I go to the craps table, a crowd gathers around to watch, and as I throw the dice, everyone screams! I know I’m not alone in this fantasy…anyone else care to join? We can take turns wearing the dress and screaming for each other ;-)

Heidi: You forgot the part where Chris is standing just behind you in a Tux, smiling. Can we take turns with him too? Heh. I call first.

Best Dressed Pro, Female – Week 5: Kym Johnson

Heidi: Yeah, I’m talking a lot about clothes this week because Petra and Kym were such standouts in a night where many tended to succumb too much to the “theme” Americana – to the point that it was over the top. But hot damn!! Kym is rivaling Edyta in that fringed dress. Beautiful and sexy all at the same time without being too overt – add in the hat at the end and, well…perfection. A scene from An Officer and A Gentleman. I am envious yet again. :-)

Courtney: Oh but Heidi, that dress of Kym’s was the reason she & Hines got a higher score than Chelsea & Mark…sooooo totally not fair! *snicker* Sorry, couldn’t help but take a swipe at some faulty logic some people were spouting on Twitter.  All kidding aside, it was a very pretty dress…Kym definitely seems to be having a love affair with fringe this season.  But nothing can hold a candle for me to her quickstep dress this season – just dreamy :-)

The “You can take the girl out of the Trailer Park, but…” Award: Kendra Wilkinson

Heidi: Someone needs to explain irony to this girl. “I’m not f^#king afraid of elegance!!!” Um…ooookay. FAIL.

Courtney: Methinks the lady-er, Bunny doth protest too much…

Worst Idea In Facial Hair…Ever: Louis Van Amstel for his faux beard

Heidi: Louis, if you lived in Tennessee, Alabama or Mississippi, you would NOT be so fond of the Hillbilly Soul Patch you were sporting this week. TRUST ME.

Courtney: Kinda looked like someone glued a merkin to his chin.  And if you don’t know what a merkin is – look it up on Urban Dictionary at your own risk :-)

Heidi: :::snicker::: Merkin…Hillbilly Soul Patch…it’s all the same to me. LOL

The Award for the Best “Accidental” Boob Grab by a Male Celebrity: Romeo

Heidi: LOL – oops. Romeo, I hope that was a true accident. :-) Of course, since Chelsie seemed to be magically enhanced from Chelsie Hightower to, say, Jessica Simpson, I guess I can understand accidentally grabbing something that wasn’t there during all your rehearsals. :-) Was I the only one seriously distracted by Chelsie and her dress and how her figure…got bustier?? Or is it simply a sign that Derek isn’t on the show that I pay too much attention to other women’s chests…and Maks’ butt crack… ;-)

Courtney: “After seeing Hines & Kym’s high scores, Chelsie opted to try some “Awesome Boobage” on for size”…I should totally make an LOLChelsie out of that.  And I can’t blame Romeo’s curiousity, if it was intentional…did you see that boy’s face when Chelsie’s sticky bra fell off during quickstep practice??? He looked mesmerized as he mumbled something about “mechanical bam-bams”. 

The Award for the Cheesiest Cheese that Ever Cheesed – Season 12, thus far: The 1000th Dance Hoopla

Heidi: Is there nothing you wackos won’t celebrate in a totally over the top cheesy fashion?? I mean, I get 100th episode and 200th episode – but 1000th dance? Maybe I would care if you hadn’t chose Kendra and Louis to dance it. Talk about a buzz kill. :::rolls eyes:::

Courtney: I have to wonder if they would have made such a big deal out of it if it were any other couple…seemed a little fishy to me that Kendra & Louis, who have been dancing in the first half of the show for the entire competition, all of a sudden got bumped to 2nd to last this past week.  Verrrry interesting indeed…but yeah, dumb hoopla.

April 23, 2011 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS12 Week 3 – The Cheesecake Awards!!

 Well, well, well…Heidi here. I’m afraid Courtney and I were very hit and run this week. While I am extremely grateful for my job, it actually had me working some nights and last weekend – and it’s sucked much of the creativity right out of me. In it’s place…well, just read me and Evaine’s commentary about half naked Derek and Maks. :-) That’s just about all I can handle. In any case, I hope you enjoy the cheesecake. Courtney is on her way out of town so I will also be struggling to fill in on her Power Rankings too. Oy. On with the show….

Worst Prop of the Week: The smoke machine

Courtney: Seldom does smoke really “enhance” a performance on DWTS – a notable exception is Jonathan & Anna’s waltz to “Hallelujah” last season – so I don’t understand why some pros insist on using them.  In Dmitry’s case, I think it was a clever ploy to conceal Petra’s subpar footwork – and it seemed to work, as Carrie Ann conveniently missed several lifts, and everyone raved about how great her waltz was, despite some rather shuffly feet.  Not sure what Louis was thinking putting Kendra in a smoke cloud – we all see how well that panned out.  She looked about half-baked as she manged to stumble out of it.  And maybe the judges had a bit of a contact high as well when they scored her, which could explain her inflated scores.  Thankfully, Tom has assured us that the smoke machine in question has since been relegated to the community theater circuit :-)

Heidi: What was really funny was the “Oh my god” that you hear in the recap – Kendra freaking out. Which is why they were all laughing so hard when they cut back to the couples on the results show. :-) Pretty hilarious. Kendra said she argued strenuously against the smoke machine and obviously lost. Which seems sucky. ALSO in the recap, you see a BLATANT lift by Dmitry and Petra – seriously blatant – and long. Kinda annoying. And the smoke wasn’t that strong – she wasn’t being eaten in like a horror movie where you could only see her from the waist up. Combine that with the TWO other lifts and I’d have to call Carrie Ann out for selective blindness.

Best Prop of the Week: Sugar Ray’s boxing announcer; honorable mention: Hines’ Terrible Towel

Courtney: Let’s face it: Ray ain’t the best dancer this season, and he probably isn’t going to last much longer. So I can’t really blame Anna for going the gimmicky route with his paso – the boxing gloves, the entrance, the punching bag…and quite possibly the most creative intro I’ve ever seen for a dance on the show: a boxing announcer, complete with drop-down microphone.  I thought it was pretty damn cute. And I daresay Hines has managed to make the Terrible Towel trendy on the show – the audience is waving it, the judges are waving it…I’m half expecting the entire celebraquarium to be waving it by season-end.  For those of you unfamiliar with what it is, it’s a yellow towel that Steelers fans wave at games.  I used to hate it, since as a Colts fan I pretty much LOATHE the Steelers. A local bar I frequent is unofficially a Steelers fans bar, and there’s always a Terrible Towel up on the wall.  The towel has been known to inexplicably jump into my purse after I’ve had a few drinks, and then commits suicide back at my house either in my fireplace or in the jaws of my Chow mix, Xena (see below). It’s really an interesting phenomenon ;-) Anywho…now I’m faced with a bad case of cognitive dissonance, since I hate the Steelers and I’m starting to LOVE Hines.  *sigh* What’s a girl to do?

Heidi: See, this is why some pros get yelled at for “messin’ about” and some don’t. Some messin’ about is pretty creative – like this. Another example is when Derek and Jennifer played the piano in the opening of their accoustic Argentine tango - very creative. Not so creative? Dusting the judges table for half the song. Sitting in the audience on your ass. LOVED the announcer, and Tom stepping in with the correct dance. As for the terrible towel – I thought that was sweet of the judges to do that. You could tell by Hines face that he was surprised and happy to see that. :-)

Costume Brain Fart Award: Louis Van Amstel, for Kendra’s rumba dress

Courtney: If Kendra’s rumba dress looked familiar, it’s because it was almost identical to the one Chelsie wore for her pro dance with Damian in season 10, and then again for her rumba demo with Dmitry last season.  But I have to confess – I thought it looked much better on Chelsie. Not only the color, but the cut – I think Heidi remarked on Twitter that all of the bodysuit-based costumes this week seemed to be cut a little on the conservative side. 

Heidi:Actually, I think I said that the bottoms look like granny panties. :-)

The “I Can Tell You’re New to This Show” Award – Week 3: Tristan and Oksana

 Heidi: Tristan, DUDE, get thee to the spray tan! I haven’t seen that much white skin since…well, since Ralph disrobed in his own bathroom. But he’s not a pro dancer AND that was funny. :-) And also…I don’t need to see tongue in the Paso Doble. Not cool. Oksana – Mark Ballas’ facial expressions are OTT and not something to emulate. Just sayin’ – that will NOT help you be a better mail order bride, sweetheart. ;-)

Courtney: I have a feeling we’re going to be having a heydey with Oksana all season :-) Very pretty girl, but an easy target – everything about her is just a bit too much.  The voice. The facial expressions. The hair. The makeup.  Definitely gunning hard for the green card ;-) As for Tristan – ok, I realize he’s trying to set himself apart as the “Irish lad” this season, but that doesn’t mean he has to look the part by being fair as the Emerald Isle! He was less Michael Flatley & more Casper the Friendly ghost out there.  Side note: anyone else think it was a bit weird that they had Ted & Nicole dancing together and having to get up in each other’s face all kissy-like a couple of times? I know Derek has said that he’s had to rumba with Julianne in the past – awwwwwwkward – but it was never on the show.  There’s 2 other chicks in the troupe…they couldn’t be bothered to stick Ted with Peta or Oksana? God I hope they separate those two in the future…because this show is gonna give me some serious Oedipal issues if not…

Heidi: Plus, the only time I remember actually seeing Derek dance rumba with Julianne was on tour when her original partner (or was it his??) was hurt – kinda funny, after the dance was over they couldn’t get away from each other fast enough. :-) You know, it also occurs to me that that Oksana could borrow Tristan’s tongue action….THAT would help the the green card for sure. ;-)

Least TV Friendly Clothing Selection: Wendy William for those rehearsal shorts.

Heidi: Is she wearing a diaper?? That’s what goes through my brain every time they showed her rehearsal footage. :-)

Courtney: Maybe she’s just SUCH a dedicated dancer that she doesn’t have time for bathroom breaks.  ;-) HA! I think those damn rehearsal shorts were about the only thing on the show that Wendy was 100% committed to.  The thing that got me is that she mentioned in a segment on her show that she loved looking the part of a “serious dancer” so much that she would wear her rehearsal clothes out to run errands and whatnot! I can only imagine the thoughts of onlookers…”Is she incontinent?” “Is she trying to conceal a bad case of camel toe?” “Is she one of those extreme gamers that doesn’t have time to use the bathroom?”

Heidi: More like, “Is she a crazy bag lady?”

Biggest BURN by a Celebrity – Female: Chelsea Kane for Outing Mark’s Request for False Eyelashes the Previous Week; Honorable Mention: Chelsea Kane for telling Mark he is a better girl than she is.

Heidi: I’m liking this girl more and more all the time. What more can I say that Chelsea didn’t? :-)

Courtney: Mark is just a liiiiiiittle too comfortable gyrating around like a drag queen – guess the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, because Corky is pretty damn good at it, too.  Someone should sign Mark up for RuPaul’s Drag Race, what with his fondness for false eyelashes and sassy dance moves.  I can  just picture him lip-synching to “Show Me Love” by Robin S. now…anywho, yeah, Chelsea calls it like she sees it, and I like that :-D I’d also like to give my own personal “honorable mention” to Anna, who made the comment “I wouldn’t be able to keep up with Mark’s choreography!” before giggling heartily during the pros/celebs talk about the other pros/celebs time-killer during the results show.  Even Anna seems to notice Mark’s spaztasticness.  LIKE.

Heidi: Last season, Mark had a thing for eyeliner. LOTS of eyeliner, not just a little. Does this mean he’s graduated?? :-)

Biggest Production Screw Ups of the Week: The Camera Dudes; (dis)Honorable Mention: The Sound Dudes

Heidi: Lovely shot of the FLOOR during Chelsea and Mark’s dance…Oh, and I really liked when it looked like someone smacked a steady cam during One Republics performance so we got that drunken pan of the audience next to the stage. Problem is, I don’t think you dudes use a steadicam, do you? :::rolls eyes::: And you sound dudes? Turn the audience mikes DOWN and the Bergeron’s mike UP – Tommy often says things that I find very humorous. Brooke? She’s fine. ;-)

Courtney: Hell, I would just get rid of Brooke altogether…except then I wouldn’t have as much cheesecake material, since a lot of it stems from her obtuseness :-) But yeah, looks like they’ve got the orangutans and Muppets manning the cameras and sound board again this year as a cost-cutting measure – either that or they’ve outsourced the grunt work to India, and they’re taking liberties with the “censoring” of the show…maybe there was a dance move they found objectionable in Chelsea & Mark’s routine and decided to avert the camera to spare us.  You think the censors over here in the States are bad…ooh wee.  Try watching a Bollywood flick.  It’s Sesame Street compared to most American movies! Instead of kissing or anything suggestive, they break into song.  I can only imagine what an episode of Dancing with the Stars: India would look like…

Tom Bergeron Line O’the Night: “Later tonight, Len goes to the Wizard to get a heart.”

Heidi: WHY are all the good ones married? :-) Seriously apropos line for the Berge, not to mention funny as hell.

Courtney: Yeah.  Tom’s dreamy :-) And Len still sucks.

Most Over Done Costuming Gimmick for the Week – Male: Dmitry Chaplin

Heidi: You know, if you whip your chest out all the time it stops being exciting OR sexy. Just sayin’. “Oh look, there’s Dmitry’s chest, it must be Dancing with the Stars.”

Courtney: He’s still holding out for a chest-off…and Tony & Maks aren’t taking the bait.  Totally unfair fight…for Dmitry.

Best Brooke Distraction Technique of the Week: Kirstie Alley, for “You’re sooo pretty Brooke Burke” to get Brook off the fall topic

Heidi: Genius Kirstie has the ideal tactic – call the other female “so pretty” – she is forced to say thank you and laugh and then she’s out of time. Ta da!! LOL!!

Courtney: You know what I really love about Kirstie? She really GETS the show.  I think she realizes that most of the banter that goes on during the show is complete crap, and unlike some of the other celebs, she’s learned to cleverly circumvent it…and she’s figured out early on that the path of least resistance is Brooke, who tends to fall apart if she drifts too far away from her canned dialogue, since her powers of improv are basically non-existent.  Kirstie, if you keep poking Brooke with this metaphorical sharp stick, I will love you forever…it is my goal for you to get her completely tongue-tied by season’s end.  :-)

COOLEST Production Dude of the Week: Little Producer Dude in the Black Shirt During Petra’s Behind the Scenes

Heidi: Please don’t tell me that I’m the only one that caught the blatant eye roll the producer (stage manager??) gave the camera after telling Petra to get out on stage (and, by extension, to STFU)!! It was HILARIOUS. His face totally said, “Get the F@#k out there already, would ya?” Poor Petra, she was all “gush gush gush” and dude wasn’t having it. :-)

Courtney: Miserable little peon :-) Nobody rolls their eyes at Saint Petra! Even you, self-important crewneck-wearing stage guy.  No matter how much her philanthropic gushing in broken English may irk you. Kapeesh? :-)

Most Bizarre Non-DWTS Costuming of the Week: Selena Gomez

Heidi: I spent most of her song thinking either she’d had a run-in with a mean guy on a lawn mower or she invited a bunch of school kids to make snowflakes out of the bottom of her dress for craft day. What the hell? It was pretty…but it was like Brooke’s satellight dish/Hepburn Hat dress. It was hard to focus on anything else.

Courtney: That whole performance was just odd to me.  I wasn’t particularly floored by her singing, her outfit, the song, or Mark & Chelsie dancing…it was all just meh.  But I’m sure Lacey would have loved to hack up that dress to make more crotch doilies.  ;-)

Heidi: I’ll give her one thing – unlike SEVERAL “pop” tarts…I mean, stars I could name, she actually sings LIVE. :-)

April 8, 2011 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS Season 12, Week 3 – Dancing by the Numbers

Oy veh. Another crazy night of scoring. As much as I love Petra as a person, and like Kendra too, you can’t tell me that their dances were that many points better than Ralph or Chris, or even Chelsea. It’s weeks like this where I have to wonder if the judges are trying really, really hard to manipulate who’s going home. Why do I say that? Well…gee, let’s take a look at the scoring. It seems clear, to me. The question is, will it work? :-)

The Judges Scores and Percentages

Place Celebrity Score Percentage
1. Hines 25 11.68
2. Petra 25 11.68
3. Chelsea 23 10.75
4. Kendra 23 10.75
5. Ralph 21 9.81
6. Kirstie 21 9.81
7. Chris 21 9.81
8. Romeo 20 9.35
9. Sugar Ray 20 9.35
10. Wendy 15 7.01

As you can see, Wendy is scored WAY below the other contestants – she’s five points below the next celebrities! That is 23,365 votes per million votes cast! I don’t disagree with that at all. It’s the scoring of the other contestants where things get hinky. :-) Specifically, Petra and Kendra – overscored, as much as I like both of them. Anyway…

I think that Kirstie Alley’s likely the safest of them all after watching Maks get injured and then soldiering through so brilliantly. Way to Go!! Maks looked to be in pretty serious pain and even at the end of the show he was favoring the one leg and not putting weight on it. I hope like hell he’s not badly hurt, but I worry. Usually the pros on this show don’t let it show as much as Maks did, which makes me think he was really hurting. I’ve got my fingers and toes crossed for him and Kirstie that he’s not hurt too badly. Regardless, I think they are safe.

I also think that Hines, Ralph, Chris and Chelsea are also safe, not so much on the scoring, but on my perception of their popularity combined with the voting. Hines, Ralph and Chris in particular seem like they would be very popular. Hines and Ralph for sure, Chris possibly less so. Chelsea is likely the fourth of the four, but she’s got some time to ramp up the competition. Keep in mind that my analysis has less to do with actual dance ability, but more the scoring combined with my feel at the end of the night for who is connecting with the audience. Of course, the overscoring of Petra and Kendra play into this as well.

Does anyone honestly think that Kendra was 2 points better than Ralph and Chris? How about Petra being 2 points better than Chelsea and 4 points better than Ralph, Chris and Kirstie?? Seriously. Even if you are a die hard fan of Dmitry and Petra…4 points? Don’t get me wrong – I adore Petra. I think she might be an angel. Someone whose outside matches her inside perfectly. And her dance wasn’t bad, or terribly flawed – just not as good, emotionally or technically, as the others. There is no way in HELL that she should have outscored the people she did by as much as she did. Not to mention the fact that her feet came off the floor at least 3 times and Carrie Ann was conveniently blind. I can see missing one lift…but three?? The conspiracy theorist in me is screaming right about now.

Look at the scoring – you’ve got Kendra and Petra who are two not horrible but not great dancers scoring higher than those that I consider to be more entertaining and better dancers, and you’ve got Wendy way down at 15 points. Now, if you think Kendra and Petra are overscored, but others scored about right, it certainly appears that the judges are protecting Kendra and Petra from Wendy’s voting fanbase – giving them a bit of a safety net that Kirstie, Ralph, Hines and Chris may not need. Honestly, I can’t figure any other reason that Petra and Kendra end up towards the top of the pack. I think they are trying to set Wendy up to leave. I don’t have a problem with that, per se, but I do kinda have a problem with them propping up dancers just to keep them around. They did that last season and we all remember what happened there. :-)

As it stands right now, Wendy would need about 47k votes per million votes cast to beat Petra and about 37.5k votes per million cast to beat Kendra. If Petra and Kendra were scored down at 21 with Kirstie, Ralph and Chris, Wendy would only need 28k plus votes to stay over one of them. And if the stories about her fanbase are to be believed, then she could probably do it. But those extra points provide them some protection – an 19k vote cushion if you will. :-)

So, now, it appears more likely that Wendy, Ray or Romeo is the one in danger. For Wendy to stay she would need to do one of the following:
- Get 23,400 more votes per million votes cast than Ray, or;
- Get 23,400 more votes per million votes cast than Romeo, OR;
- Get 28,100 more votes per million votes cast than either Kirstie, Ralph or Chris
- And so on with the other contestants upwards of 37,400 votes…

Honestly, I think it’s Wendy’s time to go. I hear too much complaining about her on twitter and in the comments here. Her fanbase would have to be massive and I think tonight we will find out. IF Wendy manages to stay, then it may be Romeo – based solely on his age and the likelihood that his fanbases is a voting one.

We find out tonight!!

April 5, 2011 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS Season 12, Week 3 – Who’s Dancing What…and When?

Okay, this could be one crazy week, for sure. :-) The celebs are telling a story that’s personal to them? Oh dear. This rarely bodes well. I can’t say that I’m a fan of this theme. But then, most of you know I’m not a fan of themes in general, although I did like the acoustic night that wasn’t. That will probably be the one they don’t do again. :-)

Now, does someone want to explain to me why we get FIVE rumbas and a hodgepodge (tm Len) for the remaining dances?? What on earth? It’s only week 3, it’s not like they’re running out of dances. Someone clue me in here. I can’t even guess what is going on – at first I thought all the top dancers were getting rumba and everyone else was getting something that played to their strengths. But then I saw that Hines has Samba and Chelsea has Cha Cha – arguably dances that will play to their strengths. They included Kendra in with the rumbas, so that also shot that theory. So, are Ralph and Kirstie so dominating the voting that they were given the rumba, while Hines and Chelsea need a little help so they got more uptempo dances? Same principle applies to Ray? The waltz definitely benefits Petra better than a Samba or a Rumba would. The only explanation I can come up with for this random set up is that it’s not random at all and it’s a bit of deck stacking to level the playing field – or attempting to. After all they got SO much attention with “shocking” eliminations…lord, I’m such a cynic. :-) Hey…anyone got a better explanation?? Back in the day, 3 years ago, they had two dances and you did one or the other. :-)

Ralph and Karina – Rumba
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.08

Kenda and Louis – Rumba – Dancing 4th per Louis
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.07

Chelsea and Mark – Cha Cha Cha
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.01

Wendy and Tony – Foxtrot – Dancing 1st (Per Wendy’s twitter – Thanks Greg)
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.02

Kirstie and Maks – Rumba- Dancing 9th, per Maks’ twitter
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.11

Romeo and Chelsie – Rumba
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.05

Chris and Cheryl – Rumba -Dancing 3rd per Cheryl’s twitter
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.09

Hines and Kym – Samba
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.03

Sugar Ray and Anna – Paso Doble - Dancing 8th Per Anna’s facebook (thanks Suzanne)
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.06

Petra and Dmitry – Waltz
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.04

Now for some girl bonding. :-)

Chelsea has her eye on the prize…

April 3, 2011 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS12 Week 2 – The Cheesecake Awards!!

 Sorry for the delay, kiddies – if  you want to blame someone, I guess blame Derek for being unusually active this week and forcing Heidi to spend more time over at PDH than usual lately.  But no further delays…ON WITH THE CHEESE!!! (Heidi: Yep, totally Derek’s fault. I worked on this in 5 minute increments. Hopefully it doesn’t show.)

Biggest Tabloid Mess Waiting to Happen: The Mark, Chelsea, Chelsie, Romeo, Stephen love pentagon

Courtney: Ooh wee.  Is anyone starting to feel the tension build up with this one? We’ve got Mark & Chelsea showmancing it up, we’ve got Romeo crushing on Chelsie, Mark & Chelsie real-life romancing it up (sort of), and Stephen Colletti is buying Chelsea small appliances.  Should any of these relationships escalate, this is gonna be a tabloid journalist’s delight.  I daresay Mark is the most unstable point of this pentagon, as I could see him getting very, very jealous if things between Chelsie & Romeo get any closer – then again, Mark seems to have his hands full with trying to get touchy-feely with Chelsea, who at times seems to play along and at other times is too busy gushing about the microwave that Colletti bought her.  Poor Romeo seems to be in serious puppy love with Chelsie.  If anyone gets hurt in this whole mess, I fear it’s gonna be him.  Be on the lookout for icy glares in the celebraquarium during rumba week – this love pentagon could quickly turn into a hate rhombus.

Heidi: So, Mark will make cow eyes at Chelsea, and Chelsie will go “hmmmm” which will make Romeo say “get out” and Steven is in the corner sayin’ “Who da HELL is Mark Ballas…Oh, wait…Hell-O Chelsie!” at which point Mark will say, “step back, dude, all the Chelsea(ie)’s for me and my mime self. Where’s my guitar, I can dual serenade.”

A microwave? Seriously? :::rolls eyes::: Go for Ballas, Chelsea, he can do better than a microwave. You’ll have to arm wrestle the shorter, pro dancer version of you, but you can probably take her. :-)

Courtney: And you can count me in as a Chelsie/Romeo shipper.  She needs someone a lot less…Mark-ier than Mark. Which reminds me…does this Mark think he’s the 2nd coming of Marky Mark (aka Mark Walberg)? Because I feel like I’m seeing him in his Calvins more and more.  I do not like this.

Len Goodman Word O’ the Week: “Chesticles”

Courtney: This week, Kendra was pushing hers into poor Louis, and Chris was concerned about how his looked to Len.  Last week, Wendy’s were attacking my face through the TV.  I wish we could see more of Kym’s, which are AWESOME.  Say it with me, kids – “chesticles”.

Heidi: I really don’t know how I feel about Len saying Chesticles. I am baffled. At the time my mouth fell open in shock and I didn’t know what to make of it. And I still don’t. I don’t know whether to be offended that he would use such a word, or be thankful that that British accent would never say “boobies” or “ta ta’s”. Confused. Where’s my wine?

Best Impersonation of a Mail-Order Bride Video: Oksana’s part of the dance troupe intro

Courtney: I actually have to credit my mom with this one, as she looked over at me while watching the show and said “So this Oksana chick…is she like, somebody’s mail-order bride? Is that how she got this gig?” I just may have to parlay some of my mom’s zingers into a segment called ”S@#t Court’s Mom Says”.   But I digress.  She was totally on the mark with this one – Oksana was just trying wayyyy too hard in her intro to be over-the-top sexy, with the honeyed Russian accent and the overdone makeup and the sultry stare.  I could practically hear the subliminal messaging in this one: “You like? You want? You get me green card? Call number on bottom of screen…cannot wait to meet my sexy American husband!” If not that…maybe she moonlights as a phone sex operator.  HIYOOOOOO!

Heidi:I got nuthin’. Your mom beats it all to hell. :-) Of course, this chick could star in soft core porn films: “Goldmember – staring James Conman and Oksana Goodnight.” “Hey, hook up with Oksana and you will have a ‘Good Night’” :::insert creepy leering guy::: Synopsis: Boner, James Boner (picture an Ohio Congressman) travels to post Cold War Russia and discovers that the sexy KGB is alive and well when he is taken prisoner…Really…I got nuthin’.

The “Ok, we get it, you’re a tomboy!” Award: Kendra Wilkinson; (dis)honorable mention: Chelsea Kane, for “We’re young!”

Courtney: AKA, the “Kendra says stupid shit every week” award.  This week she was having a hard time with “being all ladylike & stuff” and let us know pre-quickstep that her armpits “don’t really smell like a lady”.  Lovely.  I don’t know why she insists on reinforcing the fact that she’s a tomboy if she’s trying to be more of a lady on the show. 

Heidi: Errrr…if you’re going to use the AKA, then we have to give Chelsea Kane a dishonorable mention for her “We’re young, we’re suppose to take risks”…or was it “the meaning of being young is being outside the box and taking risks”. Either way it was verging on moronic and definitely ageist. Girl, you ain’t risky, you’re DISNEY. :::rolls eyes::: As for Kendra – she needs to learn to THINK like how she wants to be. If she doesn’t, then the tomboy ain’t going anywhere. And what the hell’s wrong with being a tomboy anyway?? It’s more likeable that faux “lady”. She got married when she was a tomboy, so apparently her husband likes it just fine.

Most Memorable Exit: Mike Catherwood

Courtney: Mike could have gone the normal route of most ousted contestants, just swaying awkwardly out on the floor with their partner, maybe shedding a couple tears as they’re surrounded by the other contestants and showered with hugs.  But Mike knows not to waste a great opportunity to show us what we are missing out on by letting him go so early – he drops scintillating dance move after scintillating move, just to titillate and thrill us.  The shovel. The Irish jig. The vegetable chop. The pelvic thrust – from several positions.  And some dance move so tawdry that we the viewers weren’t privy to it, and had to guess from the shocked and amused expressions on both the hosts’ & other contestants’ faces just what kind of gyrations Mike was blowing their mind with. EPIC WIN.

Heidi:I only have one thing to say: Nice ass, dude. :-)

 Least Sassy Use of a Sassy Phrase: Len’s feeble “Talk to the hand!”

Courtney: Ok Len, you had just eviscerated poor Sugar Ray for a jive that really wasn’t all that bad, and rather than just keep talking over the boos from the audience, you add insult to injury by throwing out a phrase that was, like, sooooo 10 years ago :-P This had about as much ‘tude as Dmitry’s threat of a chest-off last week.  Zzzzzz.

Heidi: A fine example of being able to dish it out but not being able to take it. Suck it up Len, really. You were unnecessarily mean, so you get mean in return. Butt head.

Most Unsuccessful Attempt to Channel a 1960′s movie star: Brooke Burke

Courtney: Last week, she was going for Holly Golightly – by affixing a big hat to the side of her dress.  This week, on Monday night, it seemed as though she was going for the “Morticia Adams at the disco” look, and on Tuesday, it was “Barbarella meets Kim Kardashian”.  Methinks Brooke (or, as another blogger now refers to her, “Broke Burke”) needs to fire her stylist. 

Heidi: Oh dear, I actually liked Brooke’s outfit on Monday night…of course maybe it was just such a vast improvement that my senses were dulled. :-)

Worst and Best Costuming All At The Same Time – Male: Mark Ballas

Heidi: I’m going to just say three words. Ooompa Loompa Mime. Okay I lied – you know how short girls wearing those mid calf length leggings make the girl look shorter? Same principle here. Add in the make up and you have edgy Ooompa Loompa. And I still want my drink for the polka dots and short pants combo. :-) It’s worst AND best because once the Oompa Loompa struck me, I couldn’t stop giggling – that’s the good. :-) All that said, it was interesting costuming other than the little person effect and I loved Chelsea’s little outfit and makeup.

Courtney: I definitely have to give him points for originality with this one.  I get so tired of the 50′s rockabilly look for the jive sometimes.  It was part Clockwork Orange, part Willy Wonka, part Marcel Marceau, and part WTF – and 100% hilarious.  I approve of this.  And I thought Chelsea was adorable in her little ballerina corset and doll lashes. 

Worst and Best Costuming All At the Same time – Female: The Easter Basket Babes plus a little Sugar…and Kym Johnson

Heidi: Am I the only one who noticed that when all the celebs were standing together at the beginning of the show it was like looking deep into a huge Easter Basket?? So many bright colors on just about all the women and Sugar Ray. It was a little too much for me. I started thinking that perhaps some hallucinogens were in order to take full advantage. :-) Looking at each separately was fine and they looked good – put them in a line and it’s blinding. But let us talk about Kym Johnson – that woman designed herself the most classic and beautiful dress for the week. Gorgeous. Love the black velvet(?) with the red lining over the white tulle underskirt. Gorgeous. I want her body and her dress. And her partner, since were going there. :-)

Courtney: I can only imagine what kind of psychadelic experience one might have if they did indeed ingest hallucinogens while watching the show :-) It kinda reminded me of the Crayola bold marker pack that I always got in trouble for using in elementary school instead of the teacher-mandated traditional pack. We  had the electric blue (Kendra), the purple (Anna), those crazy gold & red colors that I can’t remember the name of (Petra), and the fuschia (Wendy & Karina). We were one jungle green costume short of completing the set. But I agree – Kym hit the mark perfectly with that black velvet & white tulle confection.  Reminded me of that vintage Taittinger Champagne ad with Grace Kelly.  Just lovely…even if the awesome boobage didn’t make an appearance. :-)

Most Overused Costuming Addiction BESIDES Mark’s Thing for Polka Dots and Shorty Pants: Lacey Schwimmer and the short, ruffled skirt

Heidi: So this time it was boy shorts with black ruffles with red trim all around her butt. :::sigh::: I guess it’s an improvement from ruffles with a crotch doilie. Do you think this is a repressed cheerleader thing? Or what? Hey Court, send me all the different variations of this outfit that Lacey has done and I’ll do do a side-by-side. :-)

Courtney: Ask and you shall receive, m’dear :-)

Courtney: Yeah, Lacey does seem pretty fond of the whole bra-and-skimpy bottoms ensemble – but I have to give her credit for at least ditching the feathered skirt in favor of ruffles this time. And don’t forget her penchant for dancing in boots instead of dance shoes, too!  You may be onto something with the whole “repressed cheerleader” thing, Heidi – I get the feeling Lacey was more of a rebel in her high school days and probably didn’t get to be one of the popular cheerleaders.  But Lacey, honey, none of the cheerleaders I’ve seen wore bottoms like that – as one blog described it, “rejects from the Victoria’s Secret ruffles collection”.

Heidi: Bwahaha…Victoria’s Secret reject! That’s IT. I’m missing a crotch doily shot above, but ya’ll get the drift. You know, these outfits MIGHT be cute on a really scrawny, really tall girl (and maybe not), but for whatever reason they just don’t work on Lacey. Maybe it’s the hair. It’s not that she’s fat – she not even close to fat. But she is really muscular and I think that throws the outfit off. Or maybe it’s just a poor selection for anyone. Beats me.

Funniest Pro Line O’the Night: Mark Ballas “I promise if I DO kick you in the head I will promptly get an ice pack.”

Heidi: I gotta give Mark his props for that line – pretty funny and the look on Chelsea’s face was priceless. I laughed. :-)

Courtney: *sigh* *facepalm* Oh Mark…

Heidi: I know, right? THIS is why he needs rose petals and candlelight. :-)

April 2, 2011 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS 12 – Dancing With The Stars Backgrounds and Time Warps (Videos)

Good Morning America did a cool spread on the dancing couples before they hit the dance floor. It shows them were they just little to now….including some of our pros. Really cute.

On a related note, Len Goodman explains why all three judges are important with each of their backgrounds and how it makes the judging panel unique as a whole. He explains why he wants the couples to stick to the rules of Ballroom dancing versus all the modern-day theatrics. Carrie Ann and Bruno explain their dancing backgrounds before they did the show and what think is important when judging as well.

March 30, 2011 I Written By

I'm a fashion and music fan....and I have always loved dancing too of any kind. Dancing With The Stars seems to have this way of bringing all of those things together. One of my favorite dancing quotes at the moment: "No matter what, nobody can take away the dance you've already had...." ~Gleb Savchenko . For fun music and dance mixes, visit WilUnleashed Soundcloud.

DWTS 2011 – The Dancing With The Stars Cast After The Results Show Week 2 (Videos)

PopTVDotCom has a fun video up of some the cast out on the town after the results show. Check out what Tom Bergeron’s says about the “Deer Hunting Lights” and the “Velcro suit”. LOL. Maks is a hoot too for what he says on making babies with Kirstie.

Edit To Add: Here are a couple of more videos of the stars after the show being interviewed by the paparazzi. These are good too!

I Written By

I'm a fashion and music fan....and I have always loved dancing too of any kind. Dancing With The Stars seems to have this way of bringing all of those things together. One of my favorite dancing quotes at the moment: "No matter what, nobody can take away the dance you've already had...." ~Gleb Savchenko . For fun music and dance mixes, visit WilUnleashed Soundcloud.