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DWTS 16 Preliminary Power Rankings – Part I

So it’s time once again for me to gaze into my crystal ball before the premiere and try to take a wild (but educated) guess at how things are gonna pan out this season – who’s gonna be good, who’s gonna be bad, who’s gonna stick around, and who might get sent packing early.  Admittedly, this kind of snuck up on me – after my prolonged hiatus after season 15, season 16 seems to have arrived at breakneck speed and I’m just struggling to keep up.  Guess that’s what happens when one bad season turns you off of a show completely…don’t know that I’ve been this dubious about a new season of my favorite show since season 5 of Nip/Tuck 8-O

For those just tuning in, a few words of explanation about how I arrive at these rankings.  It’s a combination of factors – how good (or bad) of a dancer I think they’ll be, how much of a fanbase I think they do or don’t have, how likeable/unlikeable I think they’ll be to viewers.  So all those factors considered – this is how I predict the eliminations to shake out.  And they can (and usually do) change after seeing the first episode :-P So in today’s edition, I tackle the bottom half of the couples: the ones I don’t see lasting past the middle of the competition.  Here we go…

12.) Lisa & Gleb – It pains me to say this, considering that they’re my favorite couple, but I’m afraid my favorite Real Housewife of Beverly Hills may be the first on the chopping block this season :-( There seems to be several factors working against them – and the one that concerns me the most is the fact that Lisa’s a reality star, and she’s a Real Housewife at that.  Considering that TPTB have avoided casting from that franchise like the plague until now, and that the Housewives seem to be some of the more maligned reality tv stars amongst DWTS fans (some DWTS fans reeeeeallllly don’t like Housewives – trust me, I’ve gotten tweets complaining, as if I have any control over casting!), I’m worried that some viewers have already written her off, sight unseen.  Then again, I could be completely wrong – since we have no precedent for a Real Housewife on DWTS, how do I know that RHOBH fans won’t tune in and vote in droves for our British lass? :-)  They’re also contending with the fact that Gleb is a brand new pro without much of a fanbase (and without the benefit of being visible to the DWTS viewers already, a la Sharna in the troupe or Lindsay on SYTYCD) – although I daresay Gleb’s stunning good looks certainly don’t seem to be hurting them ;-) Besides those two hurdles, I also worry that they’re just too laid back - their rehearsals are neither memorably good nor memorably bad, which could make them blend into the woodwork amongst some of the bigger personalities this season.  And we don’t really have any idea what Lisa’s dancing prowess is like, nor do we know what Gleb’s teaching/choreographing prowess is like – they could be really good, they could be really bad, they could just “be”.  I’m hoping that we’re in for a pleasant surprise with these two, but my gut’s telling me that they’re probably not going to make it past the first few weeks of the season. Read more..

March 15, 2013 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS 16 Pros: Food for Thought – Did Maks Try to “Pull an Edyta”?

I know we’re all still reeling from the whiplash of Pro Watch – old pros are sitting this one out, entirely new pros are being brought in, troupe members are getting promoted, and the status of some pros seems to change from “out” to “in” and back again on a daily basis.  The general question on everyone’s lip: “WTF is going on at DWTS??!!!”

While I don’t have a ton of insider info about what’s going on with the casting (even the insiders seem to be somewhat in the dark this season!), I do have a theory or two, and some knowledge of previous seasons to help back up said theories – and I’m about to share one with you that may or may not put things in perspective, and may or may not help ease your concerns…but it’s one that at least makes some sense, given what we’ve seen unfolding the past week or so and what we know of previous seasons.  Take it with a biiiiig grain of salt, as I’m not 100% confident in the veracity of some of the claims made in it.  And Maks fans of the hypersensitive persuasion should probably just stop reading right now.  :-)

First, let’s go back in time to about 2.5 years ago – the week or so leading up to the season 11 cast annoucement.  Lacey had tweeted something cranky (and characteristically “Lacey”) about not being part of that season’s cast, and we were led to believe that she would be sitting that season out.  About 36-48 hours later, we were smacked in the face by the news that Edyta had suddenly quit DWTS, and Lacey was then excitedly tweeting that she was back in as one of the pros.  What happened??? Allegedly (and I’m using this as a precaution, as the info I’m about to share has been culled from multiple sources – some more credible than others, and not all of it matches up), Edyta had tried leveraging in her negotiations with TPTB – some think she was upset that her husband Alec wasn’t getting asked back as a pro, some say she was upset about the partner she got (which confuses me – read on), some say she was holding out for more $$$, who knows.  Whatever it was, I guess Edyta tried to throw her weight around as the longest-tenured pro on the show (at the time) and gave the producers an ultimatum: “You give me [insert demand here] or I quit.” To which the producers replied, “K, bye then!” I’m guessing Edyta wasn’t expecting them to call her bluff, and she also doesn’t strike me as the type who will swallow their pride easily, so of course, she had to follow through on her promise, and out she went. Read more..

February 25, 2013 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

The Top 10 Worst First Week Cha-Cha’s in DWTS History

Ahhhh, yes – the cha-cha.  The only first week dance that has remained the same in all 14 seasons of the show - they’ve often vacillated between the waltz, foxtrot, and Viennese waltz as the first week ballroom dance from season to season, but they’ve always had the cha-cha as a week 1 Latin dance.  That’s 75 regular week 1 cha-cha’s (I’m not counting the cha-cha relay from season 9 - the scoring is too funky) for me to run the stats on, to give us an idea of what we might expect in the coming week :-) So before I run down the list of the biggest “Oh god, that was baaaaaad!” week 1 cha-cha moments, here are a few interesting cha-cha stats:

*The lowest cha-cha score in DWTS history is 12 – and it’s a 3-way tie between Master P & Ashly, Tucker & Elena, and Jeff & Edyta.  Two of the couples were eliminated the first week of their respective seasons – and all 3 female pros are no longer on the show :-) (ok, that last one was probably not a direct cause of a bad cha-cha, but just an interesting coincidence ;-))

*Five former DWTS champions did cha-cha as their week 1 dance (Drew, Emmitt, Apolo, Brooke, & Hines).

*The pro who’s done the most week 1 cha-cha’s is Cheryl – she’s started 9 of her 12 seasons on the show with a cha-cha.

*A female celeb didn’t dance the cha-cha as a week 1 dance until season 5 – up until that point, the ladies had always done a ballroom dance the first week, and the men had always done cha-cha.

Now…without further ado…I give you the worst week 1 cha-cha’s in DWTS history :-) Season 14 celebs, pay attention! This is for your own good…do not try to emulate these routines!

10.) Clyde & Elena, season 4

I never got the feeling that Clyde was actually making a genuine effort during his season, really.  I think his handlers probably signed him up for the show just to get him some exposure, and it was never something Clyde really wanted to do – he just seemed to do the bare minimum each week and probably hoped to get voted off quickly. His whole “outrage” over Len pointing out that some couples weren’t practicing enough just really made me think that Clyde the Glide doth protest too much – he wasn’t putting in the hours and he knew it.  On top of the apathy, there was a huge height difference between he & Elena, and at 6’7″, he was generally just kinda ungainly…add that altogether and you’ve got a cha-cha that’s just kind of an awkward non-event.

9.) Billy Ray & Karina, season 4

I’m not sure who I feel worse for here – Billy Ray or Karina.  Billy Ray really was kind of ”a left-footed hillbilly from Kentucky” (his own words), and this cha-cha was a pretty hot mess.  I like to call this “drunk uncle at a wedding” dancing - some random grooving & flailing & forgotten footwork from Billy Ray while Karina did some cha-cha around him.   But I will say this – unlike Clyde, who had probably phoned it in before the season even started, I do think Billy Ray was giving it his all the entire season.  This poor guy REALLY wanted to do well for Karina, and he did put in the effort – but some people are just not natural dancers, and Billy Ray is unfortunately in that camp. Read more..

March 12, 2012 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS14 Casting Rumors – The Typecasting of Season 14, Part II

So we’re less than 24 hours away from finding out who is and isn’t part of this season’s cast.  Who’s pumped??? I know I am…but we’ve still got a few hours left to speculate, so let’s see what other cast types we’ve to fill this season, shall we? ;-) For those of you that may have missed it, check out part I as well.

The Teen Idol

Previous examples: Joey McIntyre, Aaron Carter, Donny Osmond, Lance Bass, Mel B., Joey Fatone, Drew Lachey, Joey Lawrence, Ian Ziering, Cody Linley, Sabrina Bryan, Mario Lopez, Kyle Massey, Chelsea Kane, Romeo

Advantages: If sales of Tiger Beat are any indicator, the teenyboppers will come out in full force to support their favorite heartthrobs/idols.  Being young & good-lookin’ sure doesn’t hurt! Many also have the added advantage of having a decent dance background, especially if they were part of a musical act.

Disadvantages: Youth can also have its disadvantages – as in immaturity.  What some might call “youthful exuberance”, others might call “immaturity” or “attention deficit disorder” – poor Cody Linley had a hard time sitting still! Emotional immaturity (a la Aaron Carter’s post-rumba meltdown in the confessional) can be especially off-putting. They’ve also got to contend with the large middle-aged female contingent of viewers/voters – they far outnumber the young viewers likely to vote for them.

Possible candidates this season: There’s that random Nicole Anderson chick that’s a friend of Chelsea Kane’s, and Heidi found some compelling evidence that rapper Darnell Robinson may be participating this season.

The Host

Previous examples: Jerry Springer, Brooke Burke, Leeza Gibbons, Mario Lopez, Kenny Mayne, Lisa Rinna, Tucker Carlson, Mark Dacascos, Rocco DiSpirito, Erin Andrews, Wendy Williams, Mike Catherwood, Carson Kressley, Nancy Grace, Ricki Lake

Advantages: Being that they’ve been at the helm of their own shows, these guys usually have the media savvy & charisma to appeal to the masses, as well as the previous exposure & recognizability.  Most (not all!) are also decently attractive, which never seems to hurt (unless, of course, you’re a model – see previous post for explanation).

Disadvantages: Many hosts are only used to hosting – as in just sitting down & talking (or dodging the occasional punch, if you’re Springer), so the lack of movement experience problem seems to come into play.

Possible candidates this season: This category seems to have EXPLODED with possibilities this season – the most solid of which being Sherri Shepherd, who was caught leaving the DWTS studio the other day.  I’m still wondering if someone fr0m GMA is part of the cast this season, since they all seemed to act so coy when announcing they’d be revealing the cast. And then we have the Maria Menounos rumor as well.

The Actor

Previous examples: John O’Hurley, Melissa Joan Hart, Steve Guttenburg, John Ratzenberger, Debi Mazar, Denise Richards, Ted McGinley, Shannon Elizabeth, Jennie Garth, Vivica Fox, Marissa Jaret Winokur, Shannen Doherty, Jennifer Grey, David Hasselhoff, Ralph Macchio, Kirstie Alley, David Arquette

Advantages: Being that their bread & butter is acting, most can usually nail the emotions of the dances. Bonus points if they’ve done any Broadway (like Winokur) because they have likely had dance experience.

Disadvantages: For lack of a better term, many of them seem to be “has-beens” – actors that haven’t been particularly active in the mainstream in the past several years – or were never that big to begin with (can anyone else think of anything John O’Hurley has been in BESIDES Seinfeld?), making it harder for them to garner votes from a public who may not remember them.

Possible candidates this season: We’ve got Melissa Gilbert & Ryan O’Neal, of course, but nothing really beyond that.

The Reality Star

Previous examples: Kim Kardashian, Kelly Osbourne, Melissa Rycroft, Steve-O, Holly Madison, Trista Sutter, Shanna Moakler, Kate Gosselin, Jake Pavelka, Audrina Patridge, The Situation, Rob Kardashian, Kristin Cavallari

Advantages: Many have achieved pop culture icon status on their respective reality outlets, making them fairly recognizable.

Disadvantages: They may be memorable for the wrong reasons – people tended to remember things like Kim Kardashian’s sex tape more than her reality show when she was on DWTS, and people seemed more focused on Holly Madison’s split from Hef than her antics on The Girls Next Door.  Many can also come across as attention-hungry & talentless(*cough*JakePavelka*cough*) – reality TV is often looked down upon as a way to get famous without having any talent whatsoever.

Possible candidates this season: Lots of talk about Ali Fedotowsky, who suspiciously moved to LA last week.

The Singer:

Previous examples: Mya, Billy Ray Cyrus, Mario, Belinda Carlisle, Master P, Chuck Wicks, Sara Evans, Willa Ford, Monique Coleman, Toni Braxton, Macy Gray, Nicole Scherzinger, Chynna Phillips

Advantages: As with the teen idols, many have had dance experience concurrent with their music careers.

Disadvantages: Most seem to be committed solely to one genre of music (often R&B or country), making it hard to appeal to a wide fanbase.

Possible candidates this season: Lots of loose lips at the Grammys about Gavin DeGraw, but it seems like less of a possibility now, considering that he is about to go on tour.

The Wild Card

Previous examples: Heather Mills, Tom DeLay, Mark Cuban, Steve Wozniak, Priscilla Presley, Buzz Aldrin, Bristol Palin, Chaz Bono

Advantages: The sheer novelty of having someone with such an off-the-beaten-path claim to fame (famous divorcee/widow, entrepreneur, disgraced politician, etc.) may be enough to have the public voting them – just to see what happens.  Being the “underdog” is a powerful thing…as we saw with Bristol in season 11!

Disadvantages: Due to their often dubious fame, people just may not have any clue who they are – I personally had to Google Mark Cuban’s name. There’s also the risk of backlash from some viewers who don’t think they’re “stars” per se, and shouldn’t even be on the show in the first place.

Possible candidates this season: Surprisingly, not too many outlandish rumors…especially since Herman Cain & Michelle Bachman have denied they’re doing the show. Phew!

So we’re getting down to the wire, kids…any last-minute predictions before the big reveal? ;-)

February 27, 2012 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS13 Casting Rumors – The Typecasting of Season 13, Part II

 So with each hour closer to the cast announcement that we get, we seem to be getting more and more leaks of who’s in – the next 24 hours will definitely be the time to stay tuned to PureDWTS, as we’ll be posting any potential last minute leaks as soon as we hear them! I dunno about you guys, but I’m getting excited…so let’s take a look at who else we might expect to see, based on casting patterns ;-)

The Teen Idol

Previous examples: Joey McIntyre, Aaron Carter, Donny Osmond, Lance Bass, Mel B., Joey Fatone, Drew Lachey, Joey Lawrence, Ian Ziering, Cody Linley, Sabrina Bryan, Mario Lopez, Kyle Massey, Chelsea Kane, Romeo

Advantages: If sales of Tiger Beat are any indicator, the teenyboppers will come out in full force to support their favorite heartthrobs/idols.  Being young & good-lookin’ sure doesn’t hurt! Many also have the added advantage of having a decent dance background, especially if they were part of a musical act.

Disadvantages: Youth can also have its disadvantages – as in immaturity.  What some might call “youthful exuberance”, others might call “immaturity” or “attention deficit disorder” – poor Cody Linley had a hard time sitting still! Emotional immaturity (a la Aaron Carter’s post-rumba meltdown in the confessional) can be especially off-putting. They’ve also got to contend with the large middle-aged female contingent of viewers/voters – they far outnumber the young viewers likely to vote for them.

Possible candidates this season: Now that the Candace Cameron-Bure rumor seems to have died down, it looks like we’re going to be seeing former child starKim Richards, also of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills fame…maybe she’s doing double-duty as the reality star this season, too!

The Host

Previous examples: Jerry Springer, Brooke Burke, Leeza Gibbons, Mario Lopez, Kenny Mayne, Lisa Rinna, Tucker Carlson, Mark Dacascos, Rocco DiSpirito, Erin Andrews, Wendy Williams, Mike Catherwood

Advantages: Being that they’ve been at the helm of their own shows, these guys usually have the media savvy & charisma to appeal to the masses, as well as the previous exposure & recognizability.  Most (not all!) are also decently attractive, which never seems to hurt (unless, of course, you’re a model – see previous post for explanation).

Disadvantages: Many hosts are only used to hosting – as in just sitting down & talking (or dodging the occasional punch, if you’re Springer), so the lack of movement experience problem seems to come into play. 

Possible candidates this season: I’ve started preparing myself to watch Nancy Grace try to hoof it this season, though I can’t say I’m even the tiniest bit excited about it.  Someone hosts I’d rather see? Craig Ferguson or Ricki Lake – the former is just hilarious, and the latter might actually be pretty good due to her Broadway background.

The Actor

Previous examples: John O’Hurley, Melissa Joan Hart, Steve Guttenburg, John Ratzenberger, Debi Mazar, Denise Richards, Ted McGinley, Shannon Elizabeth, Jennie Garth, Vivica Fox, Marissa Jaret Winokur, Shannen Doherty, Jennifer Grey, David Hasselhoff, Ralph Macchio, Kirstie Alley

Advantages: Being that their bread & butter is acting, most can usually nail the emotions of the dances. Bonus points if they’ve done any Broadway (like Winokur) because they have likely had dance experience.

Disadvantages: For lack of a better term, many of them seem to be “has-beens” – actors that haven’t been particularly active in the mainstream in the past several years – or were never that big to begin with (can anyone else think of anything John O’Hurley has been in BESIDES Seinfeld?), making it harder for them to garner votes from a public who may not remember them. 

Possible candidates this season: I think it’s safe to say David Arquette is a lock.  There’s been a couple of murmurs about Henry Winkler as well, and I’m still wondering if Lorenzo Lamas is gonna crop up, after all the talking he did last season.

The Reality Star

Previous examples: Kim Kardashian, Kelly Osbourne, Melissa Rycroft, Steve-O, Holly Madison, Trista Sutter, Shanna Moakler, Kate Gosselin, Jake Pavelka, Audrina Patridge, The Situation

Advantages: Many have achieved pop culture icon status on their respective reality outlets, making them fairly recognizable.

Disadvantages: They may be memorable for the wrong reasons – people tended to remember things like Kim Kardashian’s sex tape more than her reality show when she was on DWTS, and people seemed more focused on Holly Madison’s split from Hef than her antics on The Girls Next Door.  Many can also come across as attention-hungry & talentless(*cough*JakePavelka*cough*) – reality TV is often looked down upon as a way to get famous without having any talent whatsoever. 

Possible candidates this season: We had the great Snooki scare of 2011 (which I doubt is going to amount to anything), but Rob Kardashian & Kristen Cavallari’s names are still being tossed around. 

The Singer:

Previous examples: Mya, Billy Ray Cyrus, Mario, Belinda Carlisle, Master P, Chuck Wicks, Sara Evans, Willa Ford, Monique Coleman, Toni Braxton, Macy Gray, Nicole Scherzinger

Advantages: As with the teen idols, many have had dance experience concurrent with their music careers. 

Disadvantages: Most seem to be committed solely to one genre of music (often R&B or country), making it hard to appeal to a wide fanbase.

Possible candidates this season: Christina Milian’s name has been said quite a bit, but we haven’t had any confirmation. But rumor has it Chynna Philips is definitely in. 

The Wild Card

Previous examples: Heather Mills, Tom DeLay, Mark Cuban, Steve Wozniak, Priscilla Presley, Buzz Aldrin, Bristol Palin

Advantages: The sheer novelty of having someone with such an off-the-beaten-path claim to fame (famous divorcee/widow, entrepreneur, disgraced politician, etc.) may be enough to have the public voting them – just to see what happens.  Being the “underdog” is a powerful thing…as we saw with Bristol last season!

Disadvantages: Due to their often dubious fame, people just may not have any clue who they are – I personally had to Google Mark Cuban’s name. There’s also the risk of backlash from some viewers who don’t think they’re “stars” per se, and shouldn’t even be on the show in the first place.

Possible candidates this season: I’d say our best bet is Chaz Bono

So we’re mere hours away from the official announcement, gang – who do you think is in and who do you think is just wishful thinking? Be sure to check back here for Heidi’s Casting Announcement Live Blog starting at 8 PM EST tomorrow night …she (and the rest of us) suffer through Bachelor Pad so you don’t have to! And make sure you’re following @puredwts & @tvblog on Twitter for up-to-the-minute updates on who’s in!

August 28, 2011 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS Search Engine Round-Up – Week of June 24, 2011

 Sorry this is kinda late, kids – I’ve been caught up with end-of-quarter stuff at work, and have been spending more time at the office than I have at home, I’m afraid.  But things ought to let up a bit after next week, so look forward to some more fun posts headed your way ;-) I gotta admit – it’s getting harder and harder to write this each week, because we’re currently in the summer doldrums between seasons where we’re not getting as many hits as we do when the show is in-season…and fewer hits usually means fewer unique terms getting searched.  So just a warning – this may become a bi-weekly feature in the future, if I can’t get enough good material for it. 

Season 12 ratings

A quick search of “ratings” in the search bar will pull up all of the ratings posts, but here’s a link to the last one of the season.  Vogue posts them each week during the season, just so we can see how DWTS is stacking up against all the other shows.  They’re almost always in the top 5, but it is kinda cool to see how certain events on the show (say, “American Night” or the winner-take-all cha-cha) can affect the ratings for a particular week. 

Kyle Petty recent photos

Erm, I’d say his website would probably be the best source for that.  I was stumped as to how some of you ended up here looking for pictures of Kyle, until I did a search and realized Shawn Johnson rode along with Kyle for a few laps at the Coca-Cola 600 back in May of ’09 after winning DWTS.  I wouldn’t mind Kyle doing the show – we haven’t had anyone from the racing world since Helio, and Kyle would be the first Nascar representative to do the show.  What do you guys think?

What were Maks & Cheryl paid for dancing at the Southwest Airlines 40th Anniversary party?

A bajillion, fafillion, sho0-bad-ooh-wopillion dollars. *pinky to corner of mouth like Dr. Evil* Honestly, I don’t know…none of us know, with the exception of Maks, Cheryl, the folks at Southwest accounts payable, and the IRS. I’m sure it was a pretty penny…most well-known ballroom pros can command several grand for private exhibition performance.  DWTS pros can probably command even more.  I’m guessing at least $15K each. 

So You Think You Can Dance songs list 2011

Head on over to Pure SYTYCD for that…if you are still watching the show after the sham that was Iveta’s elimination the other night. It’s safe to say I’m pretty salty about it – it’s only week 2 and already the sole ballroom dancer this season is gone, along with the only true tapper.  I know a lot of us were talking about it on Twitter, and the topic came up of Iveta doing DWTS.  While I love Iveta, I don’t wanna see it happen – she’s just so damn good, and I almost feel like doing the show would be a waste of her talent.  Then again, maybe her talent would be better appreciated on DWTS than it was on SYTYCD.  I’m beginning to think they’re intimidated by ballroom dancers over there…

Mark Ballas gay

Hehe.  *shaking head* Sorry, couldn’t resist that one.  I’m guessing this musing sprung from the interview Mark did where he said he wouldn’t mind having a same-sex partnership, and the subsequent discussion we had about the implications of said statement.  If he is indeed gay, he’s doing a pretty damn good job of concealing it, considering the bevy of babes he’s been linked to since starting DWTS.  There was Sabrina…and Joanna Pacitti…and I think one of the Pussycat Dolls…and then there was Jeanine…and the Bristol rumors…and the Chelsie rumors…and then the other other Chelsea…which brings us to Pia, the current girl du jour.  If he is gay, he’s got a whole wardrobe of beards to chose from :-) Honestly, if nothing else, I think Mark’s stance on same-sex ballroom says less about his sexual orientation and more about his need for attention. You know that box on facebook that says “interested in” and you choose “men”, “women” or “both”? They’d need to add one for Mark – “attention of any sort”. :-D

Back in town jive song

I think you’re referring to “The Boys are Back in Town” by Thin Lizzy, the song that Mike & Lacey jived to. 

Bristol Palin book

I’d personally rather use it as a doorstop than summer reading material, but there’s a few excerpts from it in a post Vogue did earlier this week.  Overall, it just sounds like a bitter, sensationalized attempt to prolong her 15 minutes of fame a bit more – she takes some cheap shots at her fellow contestants and her baby daddy, and seems hellbent on reminding us about the “hefty check” she got for doing DWTS.  I don’t think I’ve ever heard another celeb talk about the money they made on DWTS as much as Bristol.  And Bristol, honey, no matter how easy or irresistable it might be – don’t Hassle the Hoff.  You may just get yourself labeled persona non grata in Germany…and what would that do for your political aspirations? Tsk, tsk.

Derek Hough little toe

*facepalm* No comment…

HEY! If you haven’t voted in the End-of-Season Awards yet, do so quickly – voting ends soon!!!

June 25, 2011 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS Who Wore it Better? Part XI – Season 12 Thus Far Edition

With a mere 4 weeks of competition complete, we’ve already seen a slew of costume dittos from the pros and also the troupe this season.  Let’s have a look, shall we? It’ll give Heidi & I some time to come up with this week’s cheesecake…and I’m sure it will be a doozy, after suffering through “American Night”-mare. :-)

Battle of the lime green, jeweled & feathered Latin costume: Peta in the “On the Floor” pro/troupe dance this season vs. Kym’s pro dance with Tony to Santana in season 11

Courtney: Hmmm.  Tough one for me.  I like Petra’s hair better, but I think the color looks better with Kym’s skin.  Although I’m not wild about that thing they’ve got going across the midriff on Kym…glad they omitted it for Peta.

Heidi: Peta is certainly beautiful, and looks good in the dress, but I don’t think the Awesome Boobage of Kym can’t be beaten – by anyone. :-) Add in that her darker tan compliments the dress and there you go. I do see something resembling a crotch doilie though and it’s giving me flashbacks. :-)

Courtney: I was thinking more “feather loincloth”, but crotch doily works too :-)

The winner: The Awesome Boobage prevails once more :-D

Battle of the beaded black mesh Latin dress with plunging neckline, redux: Karina’s pro dance with Louis to Jennifer Hudson this season vs. Anna’s pre-season photo shoot with Sugar Ray this season vs. Kym’s cha-cha with the Hoff in season 11

Heidi: Again, I have to go with Kym for reasons previously stated. :-) Plus, I think Anna is too pale in her photo and with the red hair it just washes her out. Karina looks amazing, but I would go with Kym.

Courtney: The problem with this dress is that it’s not a typical “Anna” dress – she seems to tend more towards the conservative, less va-va-va-voom Latin costumes these days, so she’s out.  I loved the way the dress looked on Karina while she was moving - quite quickly, I might add, which is why it was hard for Heidi to get a clear screen cap – but alas, Kym reigns supreme once more with her sex kitten hair, smoky eye makeup, and perpetual Awesome Boobage :-)

The winner: You don’t mess with the Awesome Boobage.

Battle of the hot pink fringed Latin dress, redux: Chelsea’s pre-season photo shoot with Mark this season vs. Lacey’s Team Kristi cha-cha with Kyle in season 11 vs. Anna in the “On the Floor” pro/troupe dance this season

Courtney: Poor Anna always seems to get stuck with the 3 & 4-peat costumes :-P God love her…she’s cute, but I’m not wild about the hot pink paired with her red hair.  Sticking with cute-as-a-button Chelsea on this one… 

Heidi: Ummm….not Lacey? :-) I think I lean toward Chelsea, as I think her hair style compliments the “cute” of the dress.

The winner: Chelsea’s still pretty in pink.

Battle of the red & gold paso doble dress: Karina’s paso doble with Mario in season 6 vs. Oksana’s paso doble demo with Kiki this season

Heidi: I’m going to go with Karina based on skin tone and, even though it’s not a fair comparison since we’re looking at stills, the movement she achieved with this dress. Although that could also be due to what appears to be a different cut to the bottom portion – did they remove a slit and the gold trim for Oksana?

Courtney: Oksana keeps reminding us of how she’s a “powerhouse in a small package”, so I’m guessing they probably had to hem this dress for her – hence, the disappearance of the gold trim at the bottom of the dress.  Looks like they also omitted the gold belt (likely to make her torso appear longer) and may have sewn up a few of the slits & jeweled the bodice to balance the look.  A good example of how some minor tweaking can really change the look of a costume :-) But I agree – I like the look better on Karina.  Just works better with her skin tone and her build.

The winner: Oksana the powerhouse-in-a-small-package is no match for powerhouse-in-any-package Karina!

Battle of the pink & red ruffled Latin dress: Oksana in the “On the Floor” pro/troupe dance this season vs. Cheryl’s samba with Gilles in season 8

Courtney: I feel like a lot of Cheryl’s costumes in season 8 were similar to this – ruffly, midriff-y, and brightly-colored.  I guess she was maybe celebrating her weight loss (and departure from the frumpy costumes she wore in season 7 to cover up her weight gain) with all of these loud dresses…but it just doesn’t feel like something that really fits her personality well.  For that reason, I’m gonna go with Oksana…seems like something she’d actually pick out for herself.

Heidi: Hmmmm….I think I have to go with Oksana and I’m not really sure why I like it better on her. Overall, I don’t much care for the dress at all, but Oksana wears it well.

The winner: Everyone’s favorite pint-sized mail-order bride – Oksana :-)

Battle of the red & orange fringed Latin dress: Melissa’s would-be jive with Tony in season 8 vs. Lacey in the “On the Floor” pro/troupe dance this season

Heidi: Again, a dress that I don’t care for much – but believe it or not I’m going to go with Lacey. Again, not a fair comparison because Lacey is benefiting from movement whereas Melissa is stationary. That said, Lacey’s hair is gawdawful.  But then, Melissa looks like a school marm posing as a hot Latin momma and failing miserably. :-)  So, it’s really a double fail, but less on Lacey. This time. :-)

Courtney: Poor Melissa – she didn’t even have a chance to show us this dress in motion (this was the week that she injured herself and was unable to do her jive, so they showed us the footage of the camera blocking instead).  She just wore it on the results show for the sake of consistency.  Not that I’m too disappointed – this dress reminds me of a Muppet.  Or rather, the leftover trimmings of a Muppet on the cutting room floor of Jim Henson studios :-) But weird & Muppet-y fits right in Lacey’s wheelhouse, so I’m gonna go with her as well.

The winner: Lacey rocks the “leftover Muppet” look well.

Battle of the pink ruffled mesh rumba dress & the jeweled & ruffled black mesh samba dress: Lacey’s rumba & samba with Kyle in season 11 vs. 2 wardrobe assistants futzing around backstage this season :-)

Courtney: Two of Lacey’s weirder costumes from last season, fo sho…but these boys are fearlessly rocking them.  The Asian guy dominates in this one – he’s even got the artsy Latin hand gesture down cold! Other guy gets points for trying, but the socks, dude? As for Lacey…she never stood a chance against either of these fashion plates :-)

Heidi: The Asian guy, definitely. The other guy would be doing well if not for the white ankle socks. ;-)

The winner: Lacey never stood a chance against the fabulosity of these two :-)

April 20, 2011 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS Who Wore it Better? Part X – The Pre-Season 12 Edition!

So the official cast pictures were released on Thursday, and we could be like every other site and just post them for you to see…or we could have fun and do a new (long-awaited!) edition of Who Wore it Better? :-) Enjoy!

Battle of the hot pink, fringed cut-out Latin dress: Petra’s pre-season 12 photo shoot with Dmitry vs. Denise’s cha-cha with Maks in season 8

Courtney: It’s almost not fair to pit ANYONE against someone as gorgeous as Petra :-) And while I always thought Denise looked pretty awkward in every costume they put her in, Petra wears this one well – I think the color looks much more flattering on her that it does on Denise, and I love the loose, wavy hair and understated makeup.

Heidi: Well, Denise’s makeup is too over done when she’s wearing the dress – that was distracting to me. You can tell Petra is a model – she knows how to wear clothes. Conversely, Denise is an actress, NOT a model (or a dancer) and isn’t as comfortable in her skin in this sort of outfit. It shows.

The winner: Petra by a pose.

Battle of the white & black embroidered, ruffled “crotch doily” dress: Lacey’s pre-season 12 photo shoot with Mike vs. Lacey’s jive with Kyle in season 11

Heidi: You know this dress might be cute on someone else – but not many people. Julianne could probably wear it. But this is just not a flattering cut on Lacey and I don’t get why she insists on wearing it!! But forget about the dress…what the HELL is wrong with her damn hair!?!?! Good lord, you have hair and makeup people at your disposal and this is what you do? This is not “rebel”, this is…I hate to say trailer park is the first thing that came to mind!! Limp and lifeless. You look at pictures of Lacey with the very dark hair (which makes her eyes pop) and she looks gorgeous. I don’t get why a beautiful girl sabotages herself.

Courtney: *sigh* I have to wonder sometimes what the pros’ (or the costume department’s) motivations are for picking certain costumes for these shoots.  This is one of those times.  I always thought this costume was silly – I think someone mentioned the comically placed “crotch doilies” on it, and it just kinda reminded me of something a circus performer would wear.  As for the hair and makeup – oy.  If I hated Lacey’s bleach blonde hair last season, then I downright LOATHE this dark roots, light ends ‘do she’s rocking now.  Her makeup also seems a little drab in this photo shoot – I kinda liked the “pop” that the bright red lipstick gave her face when she wore this costume the first time.

The winner: Ain’t no winners here, move along.

 

Battle of the white-fringed, asymmetrical Latin dress: Kendra’s pre-season 12 photo shoot with Louis vs. Edyta’s cha-cha with Aiden in season 10

Courtney: It’s hard for anyone to hold a candle to Edyta in pretty much any costume, but Kendra gives her a good run for her money here! Both ladies look very pretty, but I think the white is a bit more striking against Edyta’s darker hair & skin.  I kinda wish they had given Kendra a more textured ‘do…maybe some loose waves or something to frame her face better than this straight hair.  And what’s with this pose they’ve got her doing? Does she have to pee? Or did she forget to put on undies before leaving the house this morning?

Heidi: That’s the Playboy pose. You can take the Bunny out of the mansion but you can’t take the….wait. You can take the Bunny out of Playboy but you can’t take the playboy out of the bunny. Happy Hour wuz gud. Anyway, Edyta wins on skin tone.

Courtney: I guess we should also point out that Julianne actually wore this dress recently for she & Derek’s exhibition performance in Hong Kong.  Special thanks to Lori for pointing it out :-)

The winner: Edyta by a spray tan.

 

Battle of the black lace, off-the-shoulder asymmetrical hem tango dress: Wendy’s pre-season 12 photo shoot with Tony vs. Niecy’s Argentine tango with Louis in season 10

Courtney: Eh…this seemed like a bit of a cop-out on the part of the costume folks.  “Gee, we’ve got a curvy, outspoken black gal this season.  Let’s put her in a costume that another equally curvy, outspoken black gal wore 2 seasons ago!” Kinda seemed like they were typecasting a bit with this one.  I didn’t love the dress on Niecy, and I don’t love the dress on Wendy.  I think I would have rather seen her in something with a little more impact – they’ve got the other gals wearing hot pink and bright white, why not Wendy?  I guess if I had to chose, I would have to give this one to Niecy – her overall look seems a bit more put-together.

Heidi: I dunno, I think the cut of the dress works better on someone taller, like Wendy. Either way, I don’t like that cut high at the hip and then long in front.

The winner: A rough tie – Wendy wins for fit, Niecy wins for ensemble.  But neither is perfect.

Battle of the sparkly, silver-ruffled rumba dress: Karina’s pre-season 12 photo shoot with Ralph vs. Karina’s rumba with Aaron in season 9

Courtney: This dress came from the season where Karina seemed to be having a love affair with ruffles – almost every costume she wore seemed to have them! Some of you may also recall this dress as the one she was wearing when Aaron had his post-rumba meltdown in the confessional :-) Anywho…I guess it’s kind of a pretty dress.  Not necessarily my favorite rumba dress (there have been some gorgeous ones over the years), but it looks nice on her. Funny how it almost looks like it’s pale blue when she wore it in the rumba, and it clearly looks silvery-white here.  Gotta love the magic of photo shoot lighting. I gotta give this one to photo shoot Karina for the oh-so-dramatic poses :-)

Heidi: I think this dress is very pretty – but she wore it for a Rumba?? Seems very strange for a Rumba dress – of course, it was a Rumba with Aaron, so that could explain it. :-)

The winner: Photo shoot Karina…because the only drama comes from her pose, rather than her unstable partner :-)

 

Battle of the hot pink-fringed Latin dress: Chelsea’s pre-season 12 photo shoot with Mark vs. Lacey’s Team Kristi cha-cha with Kyle in season 11

Heidi: Chelsea is darling. And too tall for Mark – I wish she was dancing with Derek. :-) I smell future showmance. And exploding Bristol/Mark shipper brains. :-) She looks great in this dress and is confident enough to wear it well. I predict top 3 with these two – either that or a shocking elimination. I still don’t like Lacey’s blonde hair, so I have to go with Chelsea.

Courtney: Ok, Chelsea may be the cutest thing EVER :-) Out of all the celeb ladies, I think she looks the best in the costume they chose for her.  Love the flirty pink color, the fringe, and her adorable blonde bob.  Just darling. Lacey looks alright – definitely not the worst costume she wore last season, but the hot pink with the bleach blonde hair just looks kinda…Barbie-ish.

The winner: Mark, no question. *drum riff* :-)

 

Battle of the black tuxedo-inspired dress w/ruffled neckline: Kym’s pre-season 12 photo shoot with Hines vs. Kym’s freestyle with Donny in season 9

Courtney: At first blush, this may not even look like the same costume – but if you look at it a bit more closely, you’ll see that they just removed a lot of the tuxedo details, slapped on some ruffles, and turned it into a simple black Latin outfit.  I think she also wore it for the opening pro dance for the season 11 finale. I kinda like the simplicity of it now, without all the cheesy tuxedo stuff - although the bowtie in the back is a bit odd.  Whichever way you look at it, it makes her legs look miles long!

Heidi:I dunno, I have to go with the cheesy tuxedo version mainly because I don’t like the black ruffles at the neckline or the way it’s cut around her legs in the other version. Plus she’s really rockin’ out the hair in the tuxedo version – she makes the best, fierce dance faces ever, too – as we’ve mentioned before. :-) So, I have to go with the in action shot versus the posed one.

The winner: Cheesy tuxedo Kym, for all-around fierceness!

 

Battle of the white-fringed, sparkly-neckline Latin dress: Chelsie’s pre-season 12 photo shoot with Romeo vs. Chelsie’s cha-cha with Jake in season 10

Courtney: I actually really like this dress on Chelsie, even if I never did quite understand how it fit in with the “Risky Business” theme of she & Jake’s cha-cha.  And I dig the fiercer, more mature look she seems to be sporting this season – I like the straight hair better than the crimpy ‘do they gave her the first time around, and I’m glad they 86′ed the long black gloves.  Only one complaint: don’t she & Kendra kinda look like the Bobsy Twins? White, tiered-fringe Latin costumes with rhinestone trim & long, straight blonde hair.  Wish they had put one or the other in a colored costume, just to set them apart…both are gorgeous.

Heidi: For it to fit the Risky Business theme wouldn’t she also have to be wearing a man’s dress shirt?? Or am I remembering that movie wrong?? And doesn’t it always seem to come back to hair with us when we’re talking dresses?? :-) And yes, her dress is too close to Kendra’s – but I don’t think it’s wardrobe’s fault. There is video of Derek picking what he wants to wear and I see no reason to think that the celebs don’t go through the rack and pick what they want. The only thing is, I think they went with a color tone last season so they may have only brought clothes that went well together. Anyway, I’m with you on this one.

Courtney: You’re remembering the right movie – although Rebecca DeMornay never wore a men’s shirt in Risky Business.  She did, however, wear a pretty sexy black trenchcoat & matching fedora…kinda wish they had went with that to maintain the movie theme, but unfortunately I think the men’s-shirt-over-tightie-whities look is so iconic that no one would have remembered the trenchcoat/fedora ensemble. FAIL.

The winner: Photo shoot Chelsie, for not having Fake Jake as an accessory.

 

Battle of the beaded black-mesh Latin dress with the plunging neckline: Anna’s pre-season 12 photo shoot with Sugar Ray vs. Kym’s cha-cha with the Hoff in season 11

Courtney: I seriously think this might be my favorite Latin dress on the show, EVER.  Kym was a total bombshell in this getup – the long legs, the smokey eyes, the sexy bedhead hair, the great boobs – I wanted to be Kym in that outfit.  Minus the whole having to dance with the Hoff part, of course – that was painful to watch. Anna looks great in it, but as I always say, it’s hard to out-fox Kym & her awesome boobage.

Heidi:HEY!! I was gonna use “awesome boobage”. :-) I think we’ve been blogging together a long time. :-) Gotta agree with you. Not only awesome boobage, but better skin tone and hair for that particular dress.

Courtney: Indeed we have, dearie :-) “Awesome boobage” is also a memorable line from an episode of South Park where Kenny hallucinates about boobs.  But on a slightly off-topic note, I think (don’t quote me on this, because I haven’t done the research) this is the first time that a female pro has worn a costume for a pre-season shoot that was originally worn by another female pro.  For the promo shoots, the pros seem to just pick out costumes they themselves have worn in the past and really liked…or that a celeb has worn in the past.  Wonder how/why Anna ended up with Kym’s costume from last season…did she just not have any black costumes of her own to wear?

The winner:Kym’s awesome boobage.

 

Battle of the short purple Latin dress with black lace overlay: Cheryl’s pre-season 12 photo shoot with Chris vs. Cheryl’s “Toy Story” paso doble to Gipsy Kings with Tony in season 10

NOTE: We searched high and low for a decent quality photo of Cheryl in the Gipsy Kings performance – to no avail.  Screen-capping was equally unsuccessful. So while a side-by-side comparison is impossible, you can check the dress out in action on YouTube. And here’s a special shoutout to our reader Ryan, who pointed this one out to us when we were stumped on where we had seen this dress before :-)

Heidi: I like it, it’s cute – I think Cheryl really likes the lace overlay deal though.

Courtney: It’s a cute dress – but I’m not wild about it.  Kinda seems similar to a lot of other dresses Cheryl has worn.  I do think it’s funny that Cheryl’s pose for this season’s promo photo is identical to last season’s.  I guess it’s become her signature pose,  now that she’s gotten extensions :-)

The winner: Ummm…Cheryl.

 

And a special note on Kirstie’s dress…

As far as we (and our readers, who’s help we solicited) can tell, the dress Kirstie is wearing has never been worn before on the show - or was worn so long ago that no one can remember when.  If you think otherwise, and can provide the specific instance of when this dress was worn (i.e. “Cheryl wore this for her paso doble with Maurice in season 7″) or, better yet, a picture of when this dress was worn, we will post it in a future edition of “Who Wore it Better?” and give you credit :-) But until then, enjoy some commentary from Heidi & I…

Courtney: This dress looks comfortable.  Kinda like a nightgown.  I’d wear it!

Heidi: Definitely straight out of the boudoir – and that’s where I’d wear it too. :-)

Alright, folks – thus ends another edition of “Who Wore it Better?”.  Hope you enjoyed Heidi & I’s warm-up round of snark before we resume the Cheesecake Awards :-) So who do you guys think will be this season’s fashion plate? And who will be this season’s fashion victim?

March 6, 2011 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS Season 12 Casting Rumors – The Typecasting of Season 12, Part II

In part one of my typecasting analysis, we took a look at who we might get from the Olympian, athlete, model, comedian, legend, & soap star categories.  Now let’s take a look at the other 6 categories and speculate on who else we might see before tonight’s cast announcement!

EDITOR’S NOTE: The site is getting hit with an extraordinary amount of hits right now (which is great! :-D) but it’s also slowing us bloggers down while we post – hence, there are no links in this edition because it’s just taking too long to add them all in.  However, you can access all of the DWTS casting rumors in Vogue’s post from the other day if you need a refresher on some of these :-)

The Teen Idol

Previous examples: Joey McIntyre, Aaron Carter, Donny Osmond, Lance Bass, Mel B., Joey Fatone, Drew Lachey, Joey Lawrence, Ian Ziering, Cody Linley, Sabrina Bryan, Mario Lopez, Kyle Massey

Advantages: If sales of Tiger Beat are any indicator, the teenyboppers will come out in full force to support their favorite heartthrobs/idols.  Being young & good-lookin’ sure doesn’t hurt! Many also have the added advantage of having a decent dance background, especially if they were part of a musical act.

Disadvantages: Youth can also have its disadvantages – as in immaturity.  What some might call “youthful exuberance”, others might call “immaturity” or “attention deficit disorder” – poor Cody Linley had a hard time sitting still! Emotional immaturity (a la Aaron Carter’s post-rumba meltdown in the confessional) can be especially off-putting.

Possible candidates this season: I think the Lindsay Lohan rumor has been almost completely shot down, but Full House fans have been campaigning for both Jodie Sweetin & Candace Cameron Bure in the online voting.  I’ve also seen a surge of support within the past few days for New Kids on the Block member Jonathan Knight to do the show.

The Host

Previous examples: Jerry Springer, Brooke Burke, Leeza Gibbons, Mario Lopez, Kenny Mayne, Lisa Rinna, Tucker Carlson, Mark Dacascos, Rocco DiSpirito, Erin Andrews

Advantages: Being that they’ve been at the helm of their own shows, these guys usually have the media savvy & charisma to appeal to the masses, as well as the previous exposure & recognizability.  Most (not all!) are also decently attractive, which never seems to hurt (unless, of course, you’re a model – see previous post for explanation).

Disadvantages: Many hosts are only used to hosting – as in just sitting down & talking (or dodging the occasional punch, if you’re Springer), so the lack of movement experience problem seems to come into play. 

Possible candidates this season: Wendy Williams name has been repeated quite a bit, although Joan Rivers’ name was out there for awhile as a possible contestant.

The Actor

Previous examples: John O’Hurley, Melissa Joan Hart, Steve Guttenburg, John Ratzenberger, Debi Mazar, Denise Richards, Ted McGinley, Shannon Elizabeth, Jennie Garth, Vivica Fox, Marissa Jaret Winokur, Shannen Doherty, Jennifer Grey, David Hasselhoff

Advantages: Being that their bread & butter is acting, most can usually nail the emotions of the dances. Bonus points if they’ve done any Broadway (like Winokur) because they have likely had dance experience.

Disadvantages: For lack of a better term, many of them seem to be “has-beens” – actors that haven’t been particularly active in the mainstream in the past several years – or were never that big to begin with (can anyone else think of anything John O’Hurley has been in BESIDES Seinfeld?), making it harder for them to garner votes from a public who may not remember them. 

Possible candidates this season: Lorenzo Lamas has been claiming he’s on the casting “short list” for weeks now, so we’re thinking he’s a lock. 

The Reality Star

Previous examples: Kim Kardashian, Kelly Osbourne, Melissa Rycroft, Steve-O, Holly Madison, Trista Sutter, Shanna Moakler, Kate Gosselin, Jake Pavelka, Audrina Patridge, The Situation

Advantages: Many have achieved pop culture icon status on their respective reality outlets, making them fairly recognizable.

Disadvantages: They may be memorable for the wrong reasons – people tended to remember things like Kim Kardashian’s sex tape more than her reality show, and people seemed more focused on Holly Madison’s split from Hef than her antics on The Girls Next Door.  Many can also come across as attention-hungry & talentless – reality TV is often looked down upon as a way to get famous without having any talent whatsoever. 

Possible candidates this season: Aside from the omnipresent Heidi Montag rumor and ridiculous rumors about both NeNe Leakes & Kim Zolciak from The Real Housewives of Atlanta, we’ve also heard of former Idol contestant Danny Gokey gunning for a spot.

The Singer:

Previous examples: Mya, Billy Ray Cyrus, Mario, Belinda Carlisle, Master P, Chuck Wicks, Sara Evans, Willa Ford, Monique Coleman, Toni Braxton, Macy Gray, Nicole Scherzinger

Advantages: As with the teen idols, many have had dance experience concurrent with their music careers. 

Disadvantages: Most seem to be committed solely to one genre of music (often R&B or country), making it hard to appeal to a wide fanbase.

Possible candidates this season: There’s been big campaigns in the online voting for both Zack Wilde & Paul Byrom, but nothing really “legit” to go off of.

The Wild Card

Previous examples: Heather Mills, Tom DeLay, Mark Cuban, Steve Wozniak, Priscilla Presley, Buzz Aldrin, Bristol Palin

Advantages: The sheer novelty of having someone with such an off-the-beaten-path claim to fame (famous divorcee/widow, entrepreneur, disgraced politician, etc.) may be enough to have the public voting them – just to see what happens.  Being the “underdog” is a powerful thing…as we saw with Bristol last season!

Disadvantages: Due to their often dubious fame, people just may not have any clue who they are – I personally had to Google Mark Cuban’s name. There’s also the risk of backlash from some viewers who don’t think they’re “stars” per se, and shouldn’t even be on the show in the first place.

Possible candidates this season: Not sure if it was the hailstorm of controversy from Bristol last season or what, but this category was booming with rumors this season – everyone from Tony Robbins to Christine O’Donnell to Al Sharpton to Brooke Mueller.  Will any of them actually do the show? That remains to be seen.

So we’re mere hours away from the official announcement, gang – who do you think is in and who do you think is just wishful thinking? Be sure to check back here for Heidi’s Casting Announcement Live Blog starting at 8 PM EST…she (and the rest of us) suffer through The Bachelor so you don’t have to :-) And make sure you’re following @puredwts & @tvblog on Twitter for up-to-the-minute updates on who’s in!

February 28, 2011 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS Season 11 – The Myth of Bristol

Okay, I threatened to do this a while ago and now I’m doing it. I’m putting my fingers to the key board to answer the question – how did Bristol last as long as she did? Was it really a Tea Party, or just dumb luck and silly judges?

This post isn’t really even about Bristol herself – it’s about the judges scores versus the voting. People always claim that the judges scores mean nothing. Well, bull, they’re worth 50% – it’s the judges who decide whether they mean very little or if they mean A LOT. The way the judges scored most of this season, they were irrelevant. When push came to shove, in the finale, they got their act together. I argue that it should happen sooner – like Week 7 or so.

Okay, with that out of the way, let’s get back to business with a recap:

Week 1 – The Departure of The Hoff

I consider this the first, and one of the bigger, shocks of the season.  But maybe German’s didn’t realize they can indeed vote on DWTS, if they are properly educated on how to do so. :-) Anyway, the bottom scorers this week were:

- The Hoff, 15
- The Sitch, 15
- Margaret, 15
- Michael, 16
- Florence, 18
- Bristol, 18

So, that one really shouldn’t have been a shock, as he was one of the low scorers.  No surprise that Bristol stayed, much surprise that Margaret stayed. :-)  Bristol had a whole lot of people with lower scores (and less infamy) than her.

Week 2 – Dog Houses are very, very bad.

Michael Bolton and Chelsie Hightower exit the competition after a thorough humiliation. One that was hard to watch indeed.  The bottom scorers were:

- Michael, 12
- Margaret, 18
- The Situation, 18
- Florence, 19

See, the judges were already giving Bristol 22 at this point for dancing that wasn’t that good. You expect me to believe that Bristol was only 2 points behind Jennifer Grey, who did a seriously kick ass jive?? Sorry, but nope.  In any case, Bristol was never in any danger thanks to overscoring AND people who were worse than her. Anyway, Michael was no great shock really, now that I think about it.  A 12 is very hard to overcome when the next lowest was an 18.  He had to get 27,000 more votes per million votes cast in order to stick around.

Week 3 – Rainbows are bad too??

Nah, not really. Louis was saying on Twitter that Margaret going the gay pride route was what did her in, but what I really think happened was that after that first dance no one took her seriously. She lasted as long as she did because The Hoff and The Bolton were so much worse.  I don’t think gay pride had anything to do with it – but maybe I’m naïve.   The bottom scorers were:

- Margaret, 18
- Bristol, 19
- Florence, 20
- The Sitch, 20

Now we see Bristol hit the bottom 2 in scores – but Margaret is the low scorer, here. No great stretch. Marge needed 4,500 votes to catch Bristol (chump change) and there is no way that was happening. No shocks here.

Week 4 – Here’s the Situation as I see it

Poor Situation, and by extension, poor Courtney. :-) He did well making it to the fourth week though, I have to say. The bottom scorers this week were:

- Situation, 28
- Bristol, 32
- Florence, 34
- Kurt, 35

Again, we see Bristol insulated by a 4 point cushion – not a huge number, but she’s not the low scorer and Sitch was a worse dancer. For the Situation to stay, he had to get 11,200 more votes than Bristol per 1 million votes cast.  Say thank you to your judges, because they are charting the course of Season 11 history here.  That 4 points isn’t huge – but it still counts.  No great shock that Bristol stuck around when put up against a relative unknown (to DWTS audience) guy who is 4 points behind her. And him being the worse dancer helped. :-)

Week 5 – Serious Monkey Business

This is the week where the wheels fell off, IMO.  I dare say that Michael Bolton was more than a little irate to see Bristol wear a Monkey suit and still get an 18.  I dare say that any pro who’s gotten scolded pretty harshly from Len for use of a prop (Maks, Derek, Dmitry…) was more than a little irate at the end of this night as well.  Remember when Nicole and Derek did a FANTASTIC quickstep that broke a ton of rules? Len gave them a 6. Then Len turns around this season and gives Bristol a 6 after forgetting most of her steps and wearing a Monkey suit. And you still wanna know why Bristol is still around at this point? :-) Hint: it ain’t the Tea Party – unless of course Len whipped out his silver tea set on the commercial break. :-) Check out this weeks scores:

- Bristol, 18
- Kyle, 20
- Florence, 21
- Audrina, 23

Kyle the Popular is only TWO points ahead of a girl who danced in a monkey suit. TWO.  And Audrina, who dances better on her worst day than Bristol does on her best, is only 5 points ahead of girl in monkey suit.  Florence is only three points ahead of Bristol – and three points ain’t nothing particularly when 8 or 7 people are getting votes. The voting is spread out over more people than it is in later weeks. Florence ultimately goes home, which means that:

Kyle got 5,500 more votes per million votes cast than she did, AND;

Bristol got 16,500 more votes per million votes cast than she did.

That may seem like a lot for Bristol to achieve, but in reality it is only 1.65 percent – a tiny number. Here’s another way to look at it: this was the week where you got 8 votes per phone and 8 votes per email address. So say the average person uses one phone and one email – that means only about 1,000 more people needed to vote for Bristol than they did for Florence. Of course not everyone who watches votes…but everyone who votes doesn’t use ONLY two accounts. We’re dealing in what could be very small numbers, here.

Week 6 – The Real Shocker

Okay, THIS was a shocking elimination – but after you really think about it for a bit, you realize maybe not.   Audrina is in the top two for judge’s scores and goes home. Because of Bristol? Hardly. There was a lot more at play here.  These were the scores for the week:

- Kurt, 22
- Bristol, 28
- Jennifer, 29
- Rick and Kyle, 30
- Audrina, 32
- Brandy, 36

There are FIVE people with lower scores than Audrina going into the audience vote. Five. The spread between the low scorer and Audrina is TEN points. Now that is a nice big number.  But is it shocking that Bristol stayed and Audrina when home? No – there is only 4 points between them, while Kurt is 10 points behind her.  When the second highest scorer goes home when there are 7 dancers?? It means that person wasn’t getting votes, period, not that Kurt and Bristol had huge fanbases. It wasn’t just Bristol that beat her, after all.  Kurt had to get nearly 5% more of the vote than her, or 48,500 more votes per million votes cast. Bristol only needed 1.93% – her highest margin of the season up until the finale. And of course, Jennifer, Rick and Kyle all had to make up a difference as well.

Audrina suffered from the model curse, IMO. Very beautiful but relatively unknown to the DWTS voters. Combine that with being paired with Tony and having a high score that week and you can kiss her goodbye. People continue to assume that if a dancer has a high score they are safe. Several of us on this blog had expressed concern about her longevity for these reasons. Put Audrina up against the movie icon, the fun Disney kid, the daughter of an infamous political figure, and two well liked (and well known) athletes? Then pair her with Tony instead of Derek and her odds get worse. Nothing against Tony, but, like it or not, Derek can make a model stick around longer – Joanna Krupa was far more unpopular than Audrina was popular.  With all these conditions, Audrina was never destined to go higher.

Week 7 – The Athletes Split the Votes

That’s one of my theories anyway. People who are inclined to go the athlete route had two to choose from.  Still think it’s Bristol’s fault? Nah.  This is only the second time that Bristol has been the low scorer and it isn’t by that much:

- Bristol, 57
- Kyle, 59
- Rick/Kurt, 61
- Jennifer/Brandy, 64

There is a significant problem here. First, when you hand out that many points in a week (366) and still keep the margin at 7 points between the top and bottom you actually decrease the percentage the low scorer needs to stick around. If they did the typical 30 point possible and had a spread between the top scorer and the bottom scorer of 7 points, the bottom scorer would need more than 5% to beat the top scorer. In this week, with a total points awarded of 366, there was ONLY a spread of 1.91% between Bristol and Brandy/Jennifer.  When you are talking less than a percent between the bottom FOUR scorers, of course it’s going to be anyone’s game.  Did Rick’s fans assume he was safe because of that four point cushion? Who knows? Were Kyle and Bristol fans really, really worried?? Probably. If those two sets of fans are worried, how hard do they really have to work? Kyle’s fans had to get 0.55% more and Bristol’s fans had to get 1.01% more.  Piece. Of. Cake. Odds are always good that the low scorers fans are going to vote like maniacs and it doesn’t take many maniacs to make up 1.01%.

Week 8 – Well, I think it was Close.

Seriously, Kurt versus Bristol with Bristol being the low scorer – but only by a point. We know what a point really means at this point, don’t we? Nothing. In this case, it was obviously going to be one of the two of them and I wager it was very close. Of course, I base that on what happened in the finale, so of course hind sight is 20-20.  Here were the scores for Week 8:

- Bristol, 47
- Kurt, 48
- Kyle, 57
- Brandy/Jennifer, 58

Much better point spread this week between the top and the bottom – but still that 10 points only means that Bristol is 3.77 percent behind Brandy/Jennifer.  That’s a small number and it’s again the result of a higher number of points awarded.  So, if there is only 3.77 % between the top and bottom, it’s not hard to believe that there is only 0.38% between Bristol and Kurt – that’s no spread at all. I will say it again – Bristol didn’t need a miracle to stay over Kurt. Not at all. She only needed a couple dozen more fans than Kurt who were passionate about her staying. Maybe not even that many if they were power voting.

Week 9 – Tragedy

Well, I think it was a tragedy, anyway. Even though my favorite won, I would have liked to see a real competition. Brandy/Kyle/Jennifer would have been great.  But the question is – did Bristol play spoiler? Hmmm…Maybe for the first time.  But how much of it was Bristol and how much of it was Brandy herself? How much of it was the judges?? Again, the judges had a great deal of influence – look at the scores:

- Bristol, 53
- Brandy, 57
- Kyle, 58
- Jennifer, 60

Bristol only 4 points behind Brandy? Seriously?? People keep saying the judges scores mean nothing, but I think they’ve got it backwards – the judges scores mean everything, just  not in a good way. By scoring Bristol relative only to herself, THEY give her more potential to stick around longer.  Now, I understand doing that early on – but this was the 9th week and it was time to turn into a hard ass and they all FAILED.  Sometimes I think the judges think they are being tough, like above, giving Bristol a 53. Problem is, they don’t really get how the scoring and the audience vote works out either – or it doesn’t appear so, anyway. Because that 4 points equals 1.75%. How many time have I said how little 4 points amounts to? It’s a pittance. When you have Kyle being a likeable teddy bear, Jennifer Grey being JENNIFER GREY and Bristol getting all the buzz (plus the Vote for the Worst crew), Brandy is going to need more than that 4 points – she wasn’t getting any attention that week. No attention = kiss of death.

Week 10 – The Finale Tells the Tale.

And Bristol takes 3rd. And in doing so we learn the limits of her voting fanbase.   The final scores were:

- Bristol, 104
- Kyle, 110
- Jennifer, 118

Again, because so many points were awarded, the spread between them goes down even though the points difference seems greater.  That six points between Kyle and Bristol only equates to 2.75%, which is not that much greater than the spread between her and Brandy. But it is clearly enough to knock Bristol out of the game. I think there were a few things at work here – the judges finally started scoring them relative to each other, or seriously ranking them. When they do that, it makes an impact. But that wasn’t all – people finally figured out that if they didn’t want Bristol to win, they had to vote like hell for someone else. The highest number of votes in the history of the show isn’t going to benefit Bristol, as much as the Tea Party would like to think otherwise – hey, DWTS mirrors real life!! ;-)

At the end of the day, Bristol was eliminated because she couldn’t get past the 2.75% between her and Kyle. That was the largest spread she ever had to overcome over the entire 10 weeks of the competition.   Here’s a summation of where Bristol was each week – if she was the low scorer, I put the margin she had to overcome.

-          Week 1 – Not in the bottom 4

-          Week 2 – Not in the bottom 5

-          Week 3 – Margaret was low scorer, Margaret went home

-          Week 4 – Sitch was low scorer, Sitch went home

-          Week 5 – 1.65%

-          Week 6 – Kurt was low score by 6 points, Audrina went home

-          Week 7 – 1.01%

-          Week 8 – 0.38%

-          Week 9 – 1.75%

-          Week 10 – 2.75% – Bristol is eliminated first.

Now, do you still think that it’s surprising that Bristol lasted as long as she did?? I would hope not. I would also hope that people realize they have to vote for their favorite because the judges don’t put in enough of a spread between the dancers to amount to anything.

The moral of the story is – the judges scores mean everything, when they actually rank the contestants. ;-) But if they don’t?? You best vote.

December 16, 2010 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)