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DWTS Season 10 – The Conspiracy

No, actually I don’t believe in a conspiracy, but lots of Evan and/or Erin fans do.  So, I’m going to attempt to debunk it, although I suspect that no amount of reason and/or logic and/or math will do that for disgruntled fans.

Erin fans, you’re out of luck. Unless you think the show is completely rigged, there is no way that Erin was “robbed” in the finale.  She was in second place after three dances and still Evan beat her into the final two. That’s simple votes, AND she was helped tremendously by the judges over scoring of her Samba.  I’m pretty much leaving her out of this discussion unless someone wants to argue with me about it.

First off, a list of the common conspiracy theories floating around out there, compiled by my equally evil sidekick (or co-conspirator, if you prefer), Courtney:

“The judges pimped Nicole from the beginning.” What the hell kind of drugs are you folks on?? The Judges picked her apart every time she made the slightest of errors, while some of the other couples got away with glaring mistakes.  For example:

Week 1, Len told her she had “no footwork” and “lacked musicallity” which was absurd overcompensation. He gave her a 7.

Week 2, Len told her he was “ambivalent about the whole thing” and gave her an 8 while the other two gave her (well earned) tens.

Week 3 – Len, to put it simply, shredded them. Carrie Ann yelled about a lift (get over it already) and the broken hold.  I don’t complain about this week too much because Derek broke the rules and he knew he was breaking the rules, so they earned their criticism. But I have to agree with Carrie Ann and Bruno – other than the two rules, it was a freakin’ amazing, creative, brilliant dance. Len gave them a 6 – which was ridiculously underscored. Break two rules, deduct two points, not FOUR.

Week 4 – their least memorable dance of the season. It was about this time Nicole got VERY defensive about her relationship with Derek. It affected the dance – but the judges did not blindly pimp a less than stellar dance. All three judges were critical of various things and they ended up with a 50 out of 60.

Week 6 – Len says “ugly legs” which is a load of bull. He likes certain moves in his sambas and they didn’t have enough of THOSE moves, despite having other samba moves recognizable to this non-professional. There is a point when the under scoring to make it a race becomes obvious and stupid – this would be that week. Len gave her a 7. Seriously. If Len were really being critical in an even handed manner he would have given everyone else on the show that week 4s.

Now, it was very obvious what Len was doing – over compensating for the fact that she was a great dancer going in.  But what we’re talking about here is that some people actually believe that Nicole was pimped the whole way through – that the judges always loved her. Ridiculous. If Len was as hard on everyone, and as critical about certain moves and footwork, then no one else would have gotten above a 5 or a 6 – ever. But for as much as some complain about the show not being fair with Nicole on it, it’s also not fair that lesser dancers get better scores than they should when having much larger errors than Nicole ever had. But that’s the way the show rolls – I have to accept that Erin was absurdly over scored in the finale, and you conspiracy theorists have to accept that the show does bring on people with previous experience. Although, Erin and Evan also had previous experience – two strikes on them.

“Nicole is a professional dancer.” – Assuming this is true (which technically it isn’t) – Big fucking deal.  The best dancer doesn’t always win, and if they do – then people must actually like them. Someone on the US Weekly boards put it very well: “If 98% of the people on the ABC boards today were angry that Nicole won, then who were the ones voting for her enough to make her win?” Nicole is not the first, nor will she be the last, person with some dance experience to be on this show.  Hello, Mel B (Maks fans – he didn’t win then either), Willa Ford, Sabrina Bryan, Lance Bass, Joey Fatone, Marie Osmond…even Kristi had dance training if i remember correctly. Remember that Donny actually took ballroom lessons BEFORE the show started for his Vegas act? That’s more than Nicole had. Now, let’s talk about Mya – where were you folks last season when someone who actually TEACHES dance was on the show. What, it’s okay because she didn’t win?? You mad now because a ringer similar to (but far less experienced than) Mya actually WON the show and beat the other ringers out?  Mya is the person with the most experience ever on the show. Nicole has no more experience than Mel B, Sabrina, Lance Bass…and really what we’re talking about here is experience learning choreography. NO one on the show has had actual ballroom training, to my knowledge, other than Donny Osmond. So why are people so pissed at Nicole REALLY? Because their favorite ringer and Olympic gold medalist, defied expectations and lost? Because he is an Olympic Gold Medalist, EVERYONE expected Evan to win – he’s the ringer of all ringers like Kristi was, moreso than Nicole. So why the outrage at Nicole? He was the one to beat. BUT I said it before and I’ll say it again – no previous gold medalist had a Nicole to deal with. Likeable AND talented – Gilles was a close as an Olympian had to a Nicole and he made some critical errors late in the season.  Heh – I guess this completely blows up the theory that “people” don’t like and won’t vote for people with previous experience. I’ve always said that was bull – people didn’t vote for Mya because they didn’t like her as much as they liked Donny. And we see evidence of that again this season – more people voted for Nicole because they liked her more AND she was a better dancer. Not to mention that the other two in the final three also had experience and, in a different season when Nicole wasn’t on, THEY would have been taking the ringer heat.

“Nicole is a slut/whore/skank/etc. and was banging everyone on the set for votes.” – Hehe, this was actually my personal favorite.  If she were in fact doing this, she was banging the wrong individuals – she should have been making housecalls to every voting viewer in the nation, rather than “blowing Bruno good after the first show” (no joke – actual comment made on one comments section), which we know would have been as effective as trying to wash your hair with ranch dressing.  Courtney had an extremely pithy comment in here about the intelligence of people making this argument, but we will just leave it as – “this is a really stupid argument”.  ;-)

“Nicole was the chosen winner before the show had even started.” - Seriously, what would the producers have to gain by a) choosing a winner before the show even started, and b) choosing Nicole as that winner? If the uproar over her win is any indicator, her victory has probably done more harm than good to viewership.  There’s just no incentive in it for them…really people, c’mon on now – you’re reaching ;-)  Ya need a real motive for the producers to do this – they don’t have one, actually. If you’re going by ratings, then they would have kept Kate Gosselin longer than they did – and they sure didn’t try! They gave her the lowest scores possible and it was VIEWER VOTES that kept her around.  And can you build more buzz than by having Nicole eliminated early? I think not – look at Sabrina. Talk about buzz. I think the biggest indicator that the producers didn’t tell the judges who was ahead was Len himself saying that Nicole should win. Courtney made the point in the Cheesecake Awards that Len, like everyone else, was afraid that Evan (not the best dancer) would win, so he was making his feelings known in advance. Having seen Len bitch and moan about the best dancer NOT winning in previous seasons, I think he was prepared for the (late) conventional wisdom to prevail once again – the gold medalist wins. Everyone, including myself, underestimated dedicated Derek and Nicole fans. I think she may be the first pop singer to have a huge fanbase that was actually aware of HOW to vote to win.

I must say, just because someone is a great dancer, it does not mean that they’ve had more training than someone else. It just means they are more talented.  Brooke Burke. Gilles Marini. Those are two people (just off the top of my head) who were really good dancers who won (or should have won) who had no training at all.  Erin has had some degree of training as recently as college – she had to learn choreography, just like Nicole. Evan took ballet at least once a week and had a ballroom dancer, Mark Ballas, choreograph a routine for him on ice – gee, there must be some translation there, eh? All those gorgeous spins he can do on the floor – just magic?? Of course his skating training applies. Nicole? Like others before her, she could do a variety of dance moves required for pop singer – but she was also not trained in ballroom.  She was just a better dancer then Erin and Evan. Period. And to top it off, she had a very popular pro (whose popularity and sheer talent, like it or not, cannot be discounted) and she herself was very likable (to the masses – and no, the ABC Boards do NOT qualify as the masses) – it’s a winning formula.  Great dancer, good personality (ie not boring), great choreographer as a partner who is extremely popular in his own right. I hate to say it, but Evan did not have a very popular partner (as much as I’ve come to like her) and his own personality was rather dry at times – none of my friends liked him and none voted for him. And these are NOT Derek fangirls that I’m talking about. I’m talking former Gilles/Donny voters. Don’t get me wrong, I love Evan – it’s some of his fans who annoy me. If only they had a fraction of the class that Evan himself clearly possesses.

But let’s forget about all that stuff, even though it makes sense.  Let’s look at the actual numbers. I’ve heard so often that “Evan was robbed” let’s see if that’s even remotely true per the judges scores. Yes, they scored him lower than BOTH Erin and Nicole – but was that unfair? Did it cost him the competition? I predicted before the finale that the judges would go one of two ways: they would either cop out and give everyone the same basic score OR they would rank the dancers according to how they thought the results should be – in their opinion.  At first, it appeared they would go with the former; at the end of the first dance, there was only one point between them and at the end of the performance show, Erin and Nicole were tied with 55 points and Evan was ONLY 3 points behind at 52. Like it or not, three points ain’t nothing – it adds up to 1.8% difference between Evan and Erin/Nicole- peanuts, when you’re an Olympic Gold Medalist.  We can argue about if Evan was underscored (he was) or Erin was overscored (she was) – but I’m saying it doesn’t really matter in the end. Nicole was the best dancer and she was TIED with the worst dancer of the three going into the Finale, with Evan only 1.8% behind.

So, Evan fans really poured it on since their guy was down, right? Well, not from what I hear. I heard what they said they did in terms of voting and it wasn’t what I would call “power voting”. I read how many times they voted and my thought was “amateurs”. ; -)  But internet fans aren’t going to win the show on their own – the average viewer has to vote too. Anyway…

So, the first dance on Finale night is a three way argentine tango. Again, I predicted that this was NOT a smart move on Erin/Maks part because a dance is more than just one lift and her dance didn’t have near the technical difficulty that Nicole’s did plus that lift was NOT clean the second time.  Maks should know that they typically reverse dance order from the first night which would mean Erin was going AFTER two better dancers.  And I can hear the bitching and moaning now: “but they changed the rules, they changed the scoring, they were ranked instead of all given the same chance at a 30″. Boo Hoo – they change the rules EVERY SEASON – where have you people been? I’ve been complaining about how they change the show every season on this very blog for three seasons now.  Frankly, I like this rule change. Another thing I’ve been complaining about for a while is how the judges wuss out and give everyone an automatic 30 (although they’ve been doing better last couple seasons) or 29 — whether they deserve it or not.  This rule change actually made them rank the contestants, which is what they SHOULD do – and is there anyone who sincerely believes that they were ranked incorrectly? Basically, there seem to be two choices in this instance – they are ranked or they are given wuss scores.  I can see some preferring the automatic 30, but I doubt if the situation was reversed you would be so quick to choose that option. If Evan were actually the better dancer, would you like Nicole getting that automatic 30? Doubtful. :-)

In any case, at this point Evan is 5 points behind Nicole. It’s at this point that Erin exits the competition – even though she is 1 point ahead of Evan. Was it a conspiracy against Evan that Erin had more points? Nah, the judges were trying to make it a horse race and it didn’t work. Erin just didn’t have the votes. Evan clearly did. Although he didn’t have to have many to beat Erin – approximately 4100 votes per 1 million votes cast. Evan versus Nicole? At this point, after three dances, he is only 2.03 percent behind her.

That brings us to the final dance. Can anyone seriously claim that Evan’s quickstep was better than Nicole’s Jive? Oh, I’m sure some will try. Nevermind, we’re talking percentages. After all four dances, Evan is 2.3 percent behind Nicole. Two. Point. Three. Peanuts.

But let’s say, for the sake of argument, that Evan also got a 30 on his final dance.  That means the percentage changes back to 2.03 percent difference between the two of them.  So, essentially, those two points that Evan DIDN’T get means he has to get 0.271 percent more votes than he would have if he had scored a 30. Seriously – can anyone call that a conspiracy??

Let’s take it a step farther and assume that Evan was underscored on his Freestyle.  He got a 24, Nicole got a 27. I think that Nicole’s freestyle, even with the bobbled lift, was better and more entertaining than Evan’s. But let’s give him a 26 – we’ll assume that Len was his usual self and stuck with the 8. If Evan keeps the 30 I gave him in the last paragraph and he gets a 26 instead of a 24 on his freestyle (and all other scores remain the same), the percentage difference between him and Nicole is reduced to 0.97 percent. Easier for Evan to win with this percentage difference? Of course. But what this REALLY means is that the judges actual scoring increased the margin between Evan and Nicole by 1.06 percent. Did this make a difference? Highly doubtful. Come on, it’s 1.06 percent. If the 1.06 percent made a difference, that means that Nicole won by an extremely small margin. Listen to Tom’s script on Finale night. Did he say anything about how close it was at the end? Did he ramp up the excitement and suspense? No, not like he did when Shawn beat Gilles by less than 1 percent.  I don’t think it was even close, frankly. They didn’t really act like it was close.

Still think there was a conspiracy? Well, there’s no hope for you then. You should stop watching this show.

Think that the conspiracy was that Nicole was even on the show? She was destined to win? I have to ask – where have you been? If you’re going to eliminate anyone with previous experience, the entire top 3 would be cut out, in addition to Lil Kim, Lance Bass, Melissa Rycroft, Sabrina, Mya, Mel B..the list goes on. Where do you draw the line? Joanna danced until she was 11, should she be cut? If you lower the dance experience age that far, I wager there would be no female celebs on the show. And if you’re going to do that, then you have to eliminate anyone with a massive fanbase because of their unfair advantage – which eliminates Evan, Donny, Kristi, and Shawn, to name a few. Suck it up people – it’s a vastly entertaining show, but it’s in no way FAIR. And do you really want it to be if it means never seeing Evan, Kristi, Shawn, Donny, Nicole, Sabrina, Mel B, Lance Bass….any of them DANCE?  Not only would it be boring (and give me nothing to bitch about), but the ratings would plummet.

June 13, 2010 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS 10 Evan & Anna Dance Comparison

Evan Lysacek & Anna Trebunskaya ended the season with five recycled dances:
- Two of them happen to be the Viennese Waltz: the first done on the Week 1 and the second one on Week 10
- Four of the Five dances are Ballroom dances (Viennese Waltz, Waltz and Quickstep)
- Two of the recycled songs were originally done by celebs in Season 8

Interesting stats for these songs…

So starting with the two Viennese Waltz’s:

The first song was I’ll Be by Edwin McCain Edwin McCain - Rhino Hi-Five: Edwin McCain - EP - I'll Be as originally done by Season 8′s Lil’ Kim and Derek Hough on Week 5.

And again on Season 10 Week 1 as done by Evan and Anna

The second Viennese Waltz was done to Billy Joel’s Piano Man Billy Joel - The Essential Billy Joel - Piano Man originally on Season 5 Week 4 by Jane Seymour and Tony Dovolani.

And of course on Season 10 Week 10 by Evan and Anna.

Read more..

June 2, 2010 I Written By

My life can be summed up in the following two quotes: 1) "I am married to engineering and am its faithful wife by day, but at night my wanderlust takes hold and the arts becomes my jealous paramour." and... 2) "Engineering is my safety net. Writing is my passion. Acting is my escape when the other two become too much." So where does dancing fit in? Pretty much anywhere at this point... =)

DWTS10 Finale – The Cheesecake Awards!!!

*sniff* Sorry for the delay, kids – this week’s awards were a little bittersweet for Heidi & I, since they’re the last chance we’re going to be able to nitpick & snark until September :-( But better late than never, eh? With 3 hours of nonstop ridiculousness to pull from this week, we definitely had a lot of material to work with – and I like to think we’ve really outdone ourselves this time :-D So please – sit back, relax, and savor your last piece of cheesecake from season 10!

Best Impersonation of a Jersey Shore cast member: Brooke’s Snooki-inspired pouffy hair
Courtney: I can’t recall a hairstyle in the show’s history that was more talked-about than this one (not even Karina’s mullet!).  Thank goodness Heidi & I weren’t the only ones that were totally distracted by Brooke’s sky-high Bump-It pouff on Monday night.  And with a headband? Totally ridiculous…send her hairstylist back to Jersey, PLEASE! In fact, this pouff could have actually rivaled Snooki’s in its size…looks like J-Woww, Pauly D, and the Situation are all fist pumping under there. 

Heidi: I think Voldemort was under there. Maybe that’s why she’s improved so much – he’s controlling her. :-)

Biggest Exercise in Futility: Kate’s encore performance of her paso doble, and subsequent hustle to “I Will Survive”; (dis)honorable mention for Evan & Anna and Erin & Maks unsuccessful use of outside choreography for their freestyles
Courtney: A question for whoever had the bright idea to put Kate front & center in the opening number: did you really think she was gonna pull off the simple act of walking with a feather thingie successfully? Because she managed to botch that completely.  And the paso was terrible the first time around – did we really need to relive it, as if to confirm “Yep, Kate really is a bad dancer!” The feeble hustle that ended with her being lifted up in a cherry-picker at the end? I guess we should be thankful that it was less hustle and more just Kate being lifted.  At least she seemed to be having fun.  And after the two mediocre freestyles from the couples that used outside assistance, I reiterate: the further you go outside of your comfort zone and into something that you’re unfamiliar with, the more clueless & uncomfortable you look.  Stick with what works.

Heidi: Dude, she was downright creepy, what with the way she was “flying” and the way she was lit.  Eeep!! As for the outside choreography…well, I guess I kinda understand it *in theory*, but at that point in the season the dancers know each other (and their strengths and weaknesses) so well, that it seems to me that an outsider would mess with that.
  
Most Interesting Double Entendre: Maks’ excuse for the mess-ups on the bed – “That wasn’t the bed we rehearsed on!”
Courtney: I still can’t decide if he said this in earnest, or deliberately threw out something saucy like this.  He only dug himself further into a hole with his follow-up comment on GMA yesterday morning: “The first time we did it on the bed, she went flying off!” Oh jeebus…

Heidi: I’m tempted to make a crack about you giving Maks too much credit for superb innuendo. :-)  But it beats me if he was earnest or not.  Better was Tom’s reaction to it last night – making a big O with his arms and yelling “over sharing!!!”

Courtney: Eh, I’m leaning more towards the former – that he was just flustered and blurted it out without thinking – but Maks does have interesting ways of getting attention…maybe he actually thought of it beforehand and had it in his verbal arsenal just incase ;-)
  
The “Denial is not just a river in Egypt” award: Nicole & Derek’s vehement denial of there being anything going on between them romantically
Courtney: Ok, first there was the armpit sniffing and gum sharing.  Then the strange neck caressing.  And then, after an overtly sexual rumba, they pan to Nicole’s boyfriend in the audience – and he is NOT a happy camper.  And after a juicy bit of insider info that I heard a few days ago, I am almost 100% certain that SOMETHING has gone on between these two. 

Heidi: You forgot that she jumped on top of him in happiness – not only that, but she was running her hand over his hair and kissing on him.  More than anything it’s the hands in the hair thing and the multiple times she wrapped her legs around him. :-) And Derek keeps picking her up.
  
Biggest Accident Waiting to Happen: Erin nearly taking Maks out during the infamous jump off the stage in the their Argentine tango
Courtney: Maybe she overshot it a bit, maybe he wasn’t quite grounded enough – maybe a combination of both.  But for a second, Maks wavered, and I was worried that they both were going to topple.  Seriously – that is one dangerous lift! I don’t blame Erin for being apprehensive…

Heidi: I gasped – thought they were going all the way to the judges.
 
Best “Hairstyle on a Budget”: Nicole’s banana claw for the rumba
Courtney: Prior to their rumba, I was like “Really, hair people? First you Snookify Brooke, now you’re scrimping on Nicole and sticking her with a $2 Goody banana clip from the drugstore? You could at least bedazzle that thing, jeez!” Then I saw the rumba…and I was like “Ahhhh. I think I need to invest in some banana clips.”

Heidi: LOL – I was gonna say, nothing says “We’ve done it” more than a practiced hair loosening. Ya see, it’s the subtle little moves like that that make me go “Ahhh…I want some of that kind of action please.”
  
Best Intro for a Returning Celeb Dance: Tom’s description of Pam’s performance – “Pamela Anderson…and some guys.”
Courtney: Oh Pam – I knew you would make a triumphant return to the floor in your own steamy way! And she really did upstage all three of them, slinking around in that corset and fishnets.  Leave it to Tom to summarize it best…I’m gonna miss you till September, Tom Bergeron :-(

Heidi: Follow him on Twitter – hilarious. He and Melissa Rycroft have some weird relationship. He used her as a paparazzi shield monday night and then pseudo apologized on Twitter.  Anyway, Pam didn’t just upstage them, she ROLLED across them.  Wowza!!
 
The Candid Camera Award: Evan & Anna’s unhappy expressions in the dressing room; (dis)honorable mention for Anna clearly mouthing the f-word at the end of Monday night’s show
Courtney: Now we’ve all seen what kind of damage can be done when the couples know the camera is running during their practice sessions.  But the real fun happens when they DON’T know the camera is on them – like finale night, when they showed Nicole & Derek backstage energetically practicing their jive, and then panned to the adjacent room where Evan & Anna were sitting – glumly, like someone had killed their dog – or they were about to kill each other. Now before anyone can say “But they felt defeated after Len told Nicole she should win!”, keep in mind this was BEFORE Len said that, as neither of them had performed their final dance yet.  Not sure what they were so upset about, but someone must have told them to perk up, because they next time they showed them backstage, they were all smiles.  As for Anna’s pottymouth moment, it’s at the very end of Monday night’s show, when they’re going through the scoreboard – they pan to Evan & Anna as they’re saying “And at the bottom of the leaderboard…” and Anna looks over her right shoulder and says “F&%!” It actually made me laugh – if I were on the show, I would probably have the censors taking beta blockers, they’d be bleeping me so much…nice to know the pros slip up from time to time, too;-)

Heidi: That was striking, them sitting there. I was like, what the hell??  But at the end of the results show, when Mark picks Derek up, I’m pretty sure he lets out an involuntary “shit” of surprise – or it was my high def making the audio cut out. Buncha potty mouths. :-)
 

Best Wardrobe Malfunction Waiting to Happen – Brooke Burke and her gold Mummy dress
Heidi: When she went to talk to the final two and she actually SAT DOWN – I actually held my breath to see if the dress would bust in a strategic spot. :-) I was oddly disappointed when it held together. Seriously, they work so hard to keep the dancers in their dresses wouldn’t it be freakin’ hilarious if Brooke busted (heh) out of hers?? Anyway, she gave a whole new meaning to the words Golden Globes.

Courtney: That dress just confused me.  It was some crazy patchwork concoction – like someone didn’t have enough of any one type of fabric to make a dress, so they just combined scraps they had laying around.  I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I actually think I liked Samantha’s dresses better than some of the ones Brooke has worn. 
 
 
Tom Bergeron Line O’ The Night: “Hey Kate, while you’re up there, sing ‘Don’t Cry for me Argentina’”
Heidi: I think I actually guffawed. I don’t even know what that actually sounds like, but I’m pretty sure I did it. :-)

Courtney: Eva Peron > Kate Gosselin.  *shudder* Somehow I think that Kate would actually be a worse singer than she is a dancer (and I think we’ve already established that she is a TERRIBLE dancer!) Tom, don’t give Kate any ideas – next thing you know, the tabloids will have her auditioning for Broadway!

Hugest Disservice to an American Hero – Buzz and his strange space suit, complete with Green Lasers
Heidi: Really DWTS Wardrobe??  Really? Talk about cheesy!! Holy hell.  And Star Wars? It also lasted about ten minutes too long. :-)

Courtney: Ugh.  Enough with the space suits and references to his astronaut background.  Although I have to wonder if Buzz had some say in what he wanted to do – the man does wear a lot of NASA shirts…

Biggest Piece of Cheese I’m Most Ashamed to Admit that I Thought was Kinda Cool – The “Mirrorball Cage In Which Nicole and Evan Descended from the Ceiling.
Heidi:: I’m so ashamed. Between that and the fog, I was like “Coooool”.  :::sigh:::

Courtney: My DVR cut that part out. Thank goodness!
  
Best Self Impersonation – Derek Hough, Describing his Reaction to Almost Dropping Nicole
Heidi: So nice to see these two so relaxed. Ahem. :-) Relaxed. 

Courtney: DVR cut out on this one too…so I’ll just take your word for it ;-)

Heidi: I’ll post it. It’s actually pretty funny. Apparently there was a lot of dialog during that dance and it was Derek who screwed it up. The dance, not the dialog.

Worst Opening Sequence in the History of the Show: Tuesday Night
Heidi: Is it just me or was that a craptastic opening dance?  Did you see Kate walking along the edge of the dance floor trying to find her spot?? Did you notice Derek’s “I’m so going to puke” face?? LOL

Courtney: Another group number that looked like it was thrown together at the last possible moment.  Lots of confused choreography, dittoed costumes, and pained expressions. I think the feather thingies were meant to distract us from a clearly terrible performance – some very wise production assistant must have plucked them from the prop closet & suggested they reuse them from the female pros’ opening dancing last season.  If I were one of the producers, that production assistant would be promoted to creative director! Haha.

The “I’m So Uncomfortable Watching This” Award: Kate Gosselin informing Tony That She’s Controversial “You know”
Heidi: Um, ick? I can’t decide if it was mean of the producers to show that, or stupid of Kate to seem oddly proud of it.

Courtney: I think what bothered me most was the way she said the word “controversial”.  She put too much emphasis on the “i” – “controverSEE-al”. Like she wanted to make it sound more high-class or something.  Honey, if you have to tell us that you’re controverSEE-al – then you’re just fishing.
Moment I Expected To Be Supremely Craptastic: Vienna Dancing
Heidi: Why wasn’t she on the show?? She’s way better than Jake. I was surprised how well she did with Dmitry, then not surprised when with Jake everything got…stiff. Pardon the expression. :-) Jake turns everything Cheesy.

Courtney: Jake is a goober.  And Vienna was alright – but she still looks like she has no clue what is going on around her.  Totally blank expression.  Dude, at least Tenley had more facial expressions than just “confused”.

Heidi: :::gasp:::  Did YOU watch the Bachelor?!?!  Come sit with me in the hall of shame, girly. :-)

Courtney: Eh, I saw some of the finale…CSI must have been a rerun that night.  It was like a train wreck in progress -  terrible, but you just can’t seem to avert your eyes!
  
Surest Sign that Len’s Meds Need Adjusting: Telling Nicole She Should Win BEFORE Evan Even Danced
Heidi: I’m a Derek/Nicole fan and I have to say that was shitty. Super Shitty. I groaned out loud.  

Courtney: Call me insensitive, but it actually didn’t bother me too badly – granted, I was really surprised Len actually said it, but at that point I think it was just getting too obvious that Nicole was miles ahead of Evan. And I think you mentioned it earlier, but Len may have thought that Nicole wasn’t going to win – and hence was trying to soften the blow a bit…even if he went about it in a rather uncouth way.  Or maybe he just got sick of all of the storyboarding, and the fakey “OMG! It’s anyone’s game!” schtick, and this was his geriatric way of rebelling.  It seemed to bother Anna more than it bothered Evan – that boy is sweet as pie and totally laid back, so he probably didn’t give it much of a second thought. Good for him :-)

Biggest “Oh no you didn’t!” Moment: Kelly Monaco calling Alec the Iceman
Heidi: Geez, maybe it’s true but can you be ANY more unprofessional, bitch?

Courtney: My guess is that ABC cited some obscure line in her contract from the original season that forced her to attend – because she made it abundantly clear that she really didn’t have any desire to be there.  Maybe she was cranky cause her character’s boytoy on General Hospital just got sent to prison. No sex scenes for Sam McCall for awhile…I’d be cranky too!  But I gotta give her props for saying out loud (on national television) what we’ve been saying all along – Alec is totally blah.

Tom Bergeron Line O’ The Night, Take Two: “I’ll Never Get Tired of Seeing You Do That”, when imitating Maks jumping tantrum
Heidi: If anyone can bring Maks down to size, it’s Tom Bergeron. LOL

Courtney: Somehow, I don’t think that’s the last we’ll see of the clip of Maks jumping up and down like a toddler who wants candy at the grocery store.  I have a feeling it will resurface in subsequent seasons when they’re doing background videos of the pros.  Congrats, Maks – your tantrum is now cemented in the annals of DWTS history. :-)

*sigh* Well, we hope you guys have enjoyed your weekly helpings of cheesecake this season as much as we’ve enjoyed dishing them out. The Heidi & Courtney Bitchin’ Kitchen may be closed for the season, but will reopen for business again in September for another fun-filled season of snark ;-)  Until then, please  do continue to lurk! Pure DWTS doesn’t go on summer vacay – we’ll still be keeping up with the latest casting rumors, post-season media appearances, pro gossip, and who knows what else! It promises to be a good time…so stay tuned!

May 27, 2010 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

SPOILERS!!! DWTS Season 10, THE FINALE – And the Winner is…

After a bazillion weeks of dancing, it came down to the final two I expected. And the winner is…

Nicole Scherzinger and Derek Hough!!

Congratulations to Nicole and Derek – such a high level of dancing tonight. Amazing.

Congratulations to Evan and Anna on a fantastic season – very worthy competition. I would have been happy if you had won, I predicted you would win, but I’ve never been so glad to be wrong. Nothing against you, Evan – on the final night of dancing, Nicole and Derek delivered.

Congratulations to Erin for making it that far and taking 3rd place with a lot of grace and dignity. Well done.

Stay tuned for the Cheesecake Awards – tomorrow night. They gave us a ton of material, to be sure. :-)

May 25, 2010 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS Season 10, Pre-Finale Media!

So, Edyta Slwinska says on twitter that “it’s supposedly a shocking elimination” – she’s tweeting from dress rehearsal and she sounds skeptical. Question is, since there is one more dance…how would they know? Think Tom has two scripts? Is he reading a fake script? Did Edyta mis-hear Tom saying “*Will* there be a shocking elimination”? All interesting questions to ponder in the next couple hours. :-)

ET

Len is hilarious

Access Hollywood

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I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS Season 10, THE FINALE – Dancing by the numbers

Random Musings

Oh dear, just as I was afraid – too many high expectations which lead to disappointment on many fronts. I personally wasn’t too disappointed, mainly because my boy Derek retains his standing as King of Choreography, win or lose. ;-)

At the risk of sounding biased – and acknowledging that I said in advance this would happen so I shouldn’t be surprised – the underscoring of both Nicole and Evan (and the extreme overscoring of Erin) was ridiculous. There is no way in hell that Erin deserved a 29 for her Samba, while Evan and Nicole both get lower scores. Maks has this tendency to waste too much time at the beginning and ending of the dances and neither dance was particularly “clean”. Nicole’s rumba was amazing – the core strength at the end when she wraps herself around Derek deserved a 10 on all on its own (and I wonder how they discovered that move ;-) ) – and Carrie Ann’s lift rule is ridiculous at that point in the dance. Pretty sure she let Louis and Maks BOTH get away with something similar last season, in addition to letting Mark get away with it at least twice, once this season. I believe her words were “it was at the end and it fit so beautifully” when he did it with Shawn. I don’t have a problem with the rule in general – but they don’t actually apply that one evenly. No wonder Derek was up in arms. That said – Maks should take a cue from Derek. Protest, then apologize and take responsibility. Very mature, Derek. Or canny. Or both. :-)

I was tempted to save this comment for the Cheesecake awards, but I can’t wait – did you all see the look on Len’s face while Carrie Ann was talking about lifts?? LOL – it was freakin’ hilarious. He was looking at her like she had three heads. Of course, Len was on crack too, but I was glad to see he agreed that the dance was over when the lift happened and said so. His face was priceless though.

LOL – just saw Maks claim on Twitter that you know you’ve been a part of something special when you’re part of the most talked about Freestyle of the season. Um, Maks, you do realize that it’s not all GOOD, right?? LOL – is this like the Supreme Court Justice thing?

Freestyles? Derek and Nicole came out on top –but I have to say that, while I didn’t care overly much for Evan’s, a 24 was ridiculously low. The judges are trying to make this into a horse race and I predict that by the end of dance three it will be a three way tie. Ridiculous. Who are they trying to kid, here? Are they consciously storyboarding the finale or is it an unconscious thing? Whatever, it worked – lots of media asking the question “Can Erin Win?” They got what they wanted, but at their own expense (again). I saw a comment on Twitter that Erin technically works for ABC as an ESPN Reporter – true? I also saw a reference to Derek’s freestyle choreography being “ripped off” Mark’s – I suggest these people go back and watch Mark’s again both with Kristi and Shawn (like the cross promo, John? :-) ). Note where Mark uses a Derek/Julianne move at the beginning of his dance with Shawn. The only similarities are Derek’s pants and the energy level. Kristy does hip hop/mambo routine, while Shawn does Jaberwockies/gymnastics, while Nicole does a range of quickstep/jive/lindy hop/salsa.

You know, I say these things every season and yet I continue to be surprised and annoyed by it. I must be a dork. :-) I also, every season, try to figure out if the Judges know the vote tally going into the finale or if that is kept secret from them. It would explain a lot. Imagine this headline “Lowest Scored Dancer Going into the Final Night WINS” – meaning Evan. Huge press, the media idiots completely buying into the storyline. Even better “The Two BEST Dancers LOSE DWTS!!!” – more huge headlines and a smidge of credibility, erasing the stain of “ringer” and “Olympians always win”. Since I consider the second one fairly unlikely, I almost expect to see Evan scored harshly again tonight, so they get their big story when he wins. Only thing is, you can’t really know how the votes are going. Plus, they would have to be extraordinarily mean to overcome the relatively minor difference in scores from last night.

The Math

It’s almost pointless to actually do that math, seeing as how the scores are so close and will change before they announce third place and the winner. But, anyway:

Dancer/Total Score
Nicole/55
Erin/55
Evan/52

When you add up the total points awarded and divide into the individual dancers total score, their percentages are as follows:
Nicole/33.95
Erin/33.95
Evan/32.10

If there were no other dances to be scored, this would mean that Evan only needs 18,501 more votes than both Erin and Nicole per 1 million votes cast in order to win. Piece. Of. Cake. Of course, there’s a rub. Evan and Erin both have celebrities pimping votes for them. Nicole is not as well placed as those two. But do you vote for whoever your favorite celeb tells you to vote for? I sure hope most people don’t – that’s so sheep-y. :-) On the other hand, all three fan groups were voting maniacs last night. Judging by my tweetdeck only (and this is not the least bit scientific, only annecdotal), Nicole and Erin have the edge in power voters. Thanks to crazy ass scoring by the judges, this could turn into a horse race – but I still think it’s a race between Evan and Nicole. I could be wrong. Dial Idol has Erin in last place and they are calling her third – but you know that I don’t think that site works for DWTS. They said she was going home last week. Still, two weeks in a row in last place – a certain degree of repetition in even the most flawed polling has to make one wonder.

But that’s all that – there IS still one more dance before third place is decided. All three dancers chose Argentine Tango, AND if they do it like they’ve done it in some years past, they completely reverse the dance order. If they do that, Nicole will be first and Erin will be last, with Evan still in the middle. I don’t think this benefits Erin – if they actually judge the dances side by side, Erin’s has the lowest degree of difficulty. If all the dances are good, with no obvious flaws, and Erin scores even with the other two, I call foul. But that’s probably what they will do. :-)

So, here’s my guess. I predict that the last dance will either be scored such that there is a three way tie OR scored such that nothing changes in terms of difference between the dancers. I’m going to stick with my original prediction of Evan as the winner with Nicole a close second and Erin in third place. I hope I’m wrong – I think Nicole deserves the mirrorball.

What do you guys think? Do you think they (the judges) know that that 3 points ain’t no big thing for an Olympian and know they can score him lower and get a good story? Or do you think they are really punishing him for a poor dance? Are they storyboarding? Or wussing out?

I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

Dancing with the Stars Season 10 Finale

This is what I call a pretty crazy finale. 4 dances? That’s a lot of dances for any dancer. Let alone those that aren’t exactly ballroom dancers. Although, it seems good that they raised the bar for these 3 dancers since they are all so good. Ok, without further ado, tonight’s list of DWTS music:

Erin & Maksim danced a Samba to the song “Mi Swing Es Tropical” Nickodemus & Quantic featuring Tempo - Endangered Species - Mi Swing Es Tropical (Featuring Tempo)- Nickodemus & Quantic feat Tempo
Erin & Maksim danced a Freestyle to the song “Alone” Heart - Greatest Hits - 1985-1995 - Alone—Heart
Erin & Maksim danced a Argentine Tango to the song “Una Música Brutal” Gotan Project - La Revancha del Tango - Una Música Brutal—Gotan Project
Erin & Maksim danced a ??? to the song
Evan & Anna danced a Viennese Waltz to the song “Piano Man” Billy Joel - The Essential Billy Joel - Piano Man—Billy Joel
Evan & Anna danced a Freestyle to the song “Footloose” Kenny Loggins - Footloose (15th Anniversary Collectors' Edition) - Footloose—Kenny Loggins
Evan & Anna danced a Argentine Tango to the song “Bust Your Windows” Jazmine Sullivan - Fearless - Bust Your Windows—Jazmine Sullivan
Evan & Anna danced a Quickstep to the song
Nicole & Derek danced a Rumba to the song “The Lady in Red” Chris de Burgh - Into the Light - The Lady In Red—Chris De Burgh
Nicole & Derek danced a Freestyle to the song “A Little Less Conversation” Elvis Presley - Elvis - 30 #1 Hits - A Little Less Conversation—Elvis Presley
Nicole & Derek danced a Argentine Tango to the song “El Capitalismo Foraneo” Gotan Project - La Revancha del Tango - El Capitalismo Foráneo—Gotan Project
Nicole & Derek danced a Jive to the song

Check out the previous weeks DWTS music here.

May 24, 2010 I Written By

Better known as Charlie.

DWTS10 Week 10 Power Rankings – FINAL PREDICTIONS!

“Hmmm.”

 That basically sums up my feelings about tonight.  I was expecting to be really “wowed” at every dance – and I was indeed wowed at certain moments – but overall, I kinda just feel lukewarm about tonight’s performances.  Disappointing :-( Hopefully tomorrow night will be much more rewarding! But alas, I still must rank – for the last time this season.  So without further ado – the final predictions for season 10.

 1.)    Nicole & Derek – I am placing my faith in humanity on this one! Personally, I think Nicole’s performance throughout the season (and tonight especially) makes her the most deserving of the trophy (go ahead and disagree, cite “no growth” and “previous experience” as reasons you won’t vote for her – but she’s been the most entertaining this season for me, and the reason I’ve looked forward to each show!).  That rumba – now THAT is a redemption dance.  It’s nights like these when I truly loathe Carrie Ann and her ridiculous “lift policing”, because her harping really seemed to overshadow her praise of an otherwise perfect dance.  A little confused with Len’s complaint of Nicole not looking confident – so, the rumba is all about vulnerability, but it has to be confident vulnerability? Seems like a bit of a contradiction.  The line at the end was just gorgeous.  I actually think I liked their rumba better than their freestyle…which was still great compared to the other two this evening.  The energy and execution (aside from the botched lift at the end…there was a collective “oh no!” at my house when it happened) were unmatched, and while there wasn’t necessarily a “theme”, I think the costumes and choreo worked well with the song.  After tonight’s show almost cast Evan in a bit of a bad light (and brought Erin up to tie with her), I’m beginning to think Nicole might really have a shot at this, despite Heidi & my skepticism…fingers crossed :-D 

2.)    Evan & Anna – Oy.  These two were definitely off their game tonight.  While the Viennese waltz was a definite improvement from the previous one, I almost feel like Evan was overcompensating for lack of chemistry by flailing around the floor dragging Anna along with him.  It certainly didn’t help me much that they were dancing to “Piano Man”, quite possibly one of my least favorite songs ever written (sorry, music can ruin a whole performance for me ;-) ), and one that doesn’t necessarily have a romantic undertone to it for Evan & Anna to play to.  The freestyle…eh.  It was high-energy, yes, and Evan looked like he was having a blast – going with a jive-like routine was probably a good idea – but I have to agree with the judges: they were out of sync and you could tell Anna was not happy with it.  I didn’t think the lead-in package did them any favors either – after quite possibly being the most harmonious couple so far this season, I don’t think their breakdown could have come at a worse time – then again, maybe this will get Evan’s fans to rally.  Overall, I’m left with a feeling of blah from these two tonight – kinda forgettable.  Again, hopefully Evan can square off with Nicole in the final 2, because I do think he deserves to be there, but I’m starting to think that he may not be the voting juggernaut that we think he is… 

3.)    Erin & Maks – I’m left on the fence about these two in both dances – parts I loved, parts I hated.  The samba was a definite improvement – this was the first time I’ve seen Erin truly “let loose” and have fun, even if she did still struggle with the runs a bit. Thought the bit at the end with the grinding on the judges and kissing Len was silly and a waste of time – but that seems to be Maks’ M.O. these days, throwing in fluff at the end to fill in the few remaining bars of music.  But overall, a fun dance that showed growth.  Ok, now as for the freestyle – I actually loved the idea of it.  While I may hate “Piano Man”, the show redeemed itself when they used “Alone”, which is in my top 10 favorite songs of all time (god, I <3 Heart!), and I loved the idea of doing something slower & more artsy as a freestyle.  However…I thought the overall execution of the idea just missed the mark completely.  The choreography felt extremely frantic and messy to me – and I’m not sure who the blame for that lies with…could be Mandy, could be Erin, because Maks seems like he let those two take the reigns this time, out of lack of experience in the contemporary style.  Thought the couch at the beginning was completely unnecessary, and they relied too heavily on the bed choreographically.  I really had a hard time not comparing this to two different routines from season 4 of SYTYCD – Mandy’s lyrical to “Alone” for Will & Jessica, and Mia’s contemporary bed routine for Twitch & Kherington – because that’s really what this felt like to me…those two routines combined, but not as good as either one.  I definitely give them props for taking the risk – this is routine I will definitely remember as a standout – but it just fell short, which is what I’m thinking will happen with Erin tomorrow night…she’ll just fall short of Evan in terms of votes, and will likely get third.

And with that, I lock in my predictions for season 10, and hang up my ranking hat until September :-) But the best part of the rankings is the feedback, so troops, SOUND OFF! How do you think things will play out tomorrow night?

 P.S. I know I’ve been shamelessly plugging Purdue for the past 2 weeks in the college competition, but I’m gonna do it one more time: VOTE FOR ‘EM! Yes, they will likely get their butts handed to them by Utah Valley (seriously, they’re like robots…how are they that in sync???), but let’s at least make it close race, mmmkay? ;-)

I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

Pure Dancing with the Stars Season 10 Winner

In case you missed it, we posted a poll after last week’s show to predict the winner of Dancing with the Stars season 10. So far we’ve gotten 684 votes. Here are the results:

Looks like it’s down to Evan and Nicole (no surprise there) with Evan the winner of Dancing with the Stars season 10. This should be fun to watch.

I Written By

Better known as Charlie.

DWTS 10: Final Dance Predictions

So here we are… the Finals. The last week of Dancing with the Stars for the season until the Fall Season starts and the cycle begins again.

Normally I would do a breakdown of dances and predict a score… since most of the dances are rehashes of what they have done previously I will only provide the score they have achieved when they did the dance the first time around:

Erin Andrews / Maksim Chmerkovskiy
Monday Night:

Judges Choice: Samba – Week 6: 25/30
Freestyle
- Season 4 (w/ Laila Ali): 26/30
- Season 5 (w/ Melanie Brown): 27/30

Tuesday Night:
Argentine Tango – Week 8: 28/30
Viennese Waltz(?) – Week 9: 27/30

Nicole Scherzinger / Derek Hough
Monday Night:

Judges Choice: Rumba – Week 4: 25/30
Freestyle
- Season 7 (w/ Brooke Burke): 30/30

Tuesday Night:
Argentine Tango – Week 9: 30/30
Jive – Week 2: 28/30

Evan Lysacek / Anna Trebunskaya
Monday Night:

Judges Choice: Viennese Waltz – Week 1: 23/30
Freestyle
- Season 2 (w/ Jerry Rice): 27/30

Tuesday Night:
Argentine Tango – Week 7: 30/30
Quickstep – Week 3: 26/30

Read more..

I Written By

My life can be summed up in the following two quotes: 1) "I am married to engineering and am its faithful wife by day, but at night my wanderlust takes hold and the arts becomes my jealous paramour." and... 2) "Engineering is my safety net. Writing is my passion. Acting is my escape when the other two become too much." So where does dancing fit in? Pretty much anywhere at this point... =)