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DWTS 11, Week 2 Media – Part IV

Okay, I hated what Bruno said….but Michael, get over it already. Entertainment Tonight:

Audrina on ET – this Michael thing ain’t going away anytime soon.

The Situation – Paparazzi are bizarre people.

Chelsie on her charity work and Latisse…and the Situation. She’s a cutie, for sure.

Jennifer on Ellen

Jennifer and Derek on Ellen

October 2, 2010 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS 11, Week 3 Media – Part III

Tom was on George Lopez last night and I saw this little ad for it – If I find more I’ll post it. Looks to be Tom Bergeron at his best. ;-)

The Sitch and Karina

Kyle and Lacey

Cheryl on a Box and Rick. :-)

Mad props to Maks for this – LOL:

Kurt and Anna with George from the LA Affiliate

Bristol – much ado about nothing.

October 1, 2010 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS Season 11, Week 2 Media – Part II

It always strikes me as so funny how Len is so different with the paps as he is on the show. Hilarious. Len, Carrie Ann and several of the rest talk to PopTV.com. Including Kym!! After Tony, there is a whole bunch of weirdness, the Maks makes an appearance towards the end.

ET from before Results

The Insider from Tuesday

Watch Derek veer into dangerous “I don’t mean to infer anything about your age” territory at the end of this video. Lots of good commentary about Michael too.

Michael and Chelsie

September 30, 2010 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS11, Week 2 – The Cheesecake Awards!

Here it is, hungry patrons…Heidi soldiered through and came up with some great stuff! And we have visual aids this week. ;-) LET THEM EAT CHEESECAKE!!!

The Costume Brain Fart Award – Tony Dovolani, with an assist from the folks at Randall for dittoing Melissa’s waltz dress from season 8 for Audrina’s quickstep this week; honorable mention for Jennifer’s jive dress, Maks’ jive outfit, and Bristol’s quickstep dress




Courtney: Not sure if it was a feeling of nostalgia or just a lack of creativity on the part of the pros or the costume department, but some of this week’s costumes felt awfully familiar…and probably the most familiar of those was Audrina’s quickstep dress, which was (nearly) identical to the dress Melissa wore for her waltz in season 8, save for a color change and a slightly different cut around the midsection. Jennifer’s jive dress almost seemed like a hybrid of the dress that both Chelsie wore for her salsa with Ty in season 8 (and Nicole wore her finale jive with Derek last season) and the fringe top & pants that Brooke wore for her salsa with Derek in season 7.  A little minor tweakage of the pattern from Kym’s dress from her Viennese waltz with Donny in season 9 gave us Bristol’s quickstep dress this week, and Maks fell back on the ol’ checkered highwater pants, suspenders, and a tie combo from his would-be jive with Misty in season 7 for his jive with Brandy this week.  Ahhh, memories…

Heidi: Derek said he designed Jennifer’s (and had to assure her that she had the body to wear it), so I know he was involved.  But there were so many similarities in costumes that I wonder if the pros are kinda at the point of saying – while running to teach the dance – Hey Randall, I want something like that time I danced with so and so only with this and this instead of that and that.  When you are more worried about your celeb getting the dance, how much time are you going to spend coming up with new designs every week??  In some cases, it works (Jennifer and Audrina) and in others? Not so much – Brandy and Maks (but more Maks than Brandy :-) ).  And that leads us to…

The WTF Was That? Costuming Choice Award, Male – Tony Dovolani for leather trimmed pants; honorable mention to Maks’ Checkered Highwater Pants and Suspenders

Heidi: Don’t get me wrong – I LOVED the color coordinated shirt with the long jacket with the leather (patent leather?) trim, but when you add that trim to the pants in not only a stripe but what appeared to be…shin guards?… and a wrap around thigh it was just much too much. I had to watch the dance a second time to get past it. :-)  And Maks? Dude, you are much too old and much too burly for that outfit.  That outfit requires a slender model’s body and a more boyish look, IMO. Not that there’s anything wrong with burly – just put it in different clothes. :-)

Courtney: Not sure exactly what look Tony was going for this week…going to do a piano concerto at a biker rally? Dressing up as a cross between Don Johnson on Miami Vice and “The Crow”? Or maybe trying rehash the Adam Lambert look (with a classy twist) from his tango with Kate last season? Whatever it was, I agree with you, Heidi – it was a bit much.  At least if he goes for a late-night jog in this outfit, the patent leather will reflect enough light to keep him safe from motorists ;-) As for Maks – I’m gonna go with the Al Borland from Home Improvement meets hip-hop manservant Fonzworth Bentley look.  Just not a fan of it on Maks…seems something better-suited to one of the goofier guys, like Mark or Louis. I prefer him doing jive in just black dance pants and his signature black tank – kinda like the one from the Hall & Oates performance a few seasons back.

The WTF Was That? Costuming Choice Award, Female – Lacey Schwimmer for that Quickstep dress

Heidi: This is one of those things that really makes me believe that Lacey thinks mainly of herself at all times. I mean, come on – could you even see Kyle behind that dress? That dress was ghastly at the best of times, but during a quickstep?? Aren’t you supposed to be able to see the feet? Or maybe THAT was her point – Kyle didn’t have footwork. But really, that dress seriously detracted from the dance – but I guess as long as YOU’RE happy, Lacey.

Courtney: The top reminds me of something a circus trapeze artist might wear, and the bottom is a cross between a tutu, a quincenera dress, and one of those cakes with a Barbie stuck in it where the icing is the skirt of her dress.  The overall result is, like Tony’s pants, just too much.  If the top had flowed into a more simple, streamlined skirt, I think I may have really liked it.  I can picture her running into the costume department and demanding “more ruffles! more ruffles!” Oh well – I guess if any of the ladies on the show had to wear it, Lacey would pull it off the best.

Heidi: Ummm…cake.

Awkward Brooke Burke Comment o’ the Week: Referring to Florence’s “beautiful age”

Heidi: Things that make you go whuuutt??  I think she started to say something else and something happened. Either she thought better of it, or the voices in her head…I mean, the producers were talking to her. ;-)

Courtney: Oy…had to cringe at that one.  Tried to wrap my brain around how that one could possibly make sense…to no avail.  It’s like saying “musical elbow” or “conceited trumpet” – just an adjective and a noun that don’t really go together to me.  Poor Brooke – either she was trying to come up with something on the fly (and it didn’t really work), or someone was feeding her something in the earpiece and she just got it garbled.

Asshat o’ the Week Award: Bruno Tonioli

Courtney: If Bruno set out to make himself look like an inconsiderate, condescending, dance critique ignoramus, he sure passed with flying colors.  I almost feel like, in true flamboyant Bruno fashion, he set out to make a spectacle of each critique – even if it meant raking poor Michael across the coals, then rubbing salt in the wounds of his metaphorical 3rd-degree burns.  Did that jive suck? Yes.  Did he need make a hatchet job of his critique and humiliate Michael, who already seemed very humbled and embarassed by the experience? HELL NO.  What he did was not a genuine, constructive critique – it was an excercise in self-love and attention whoring.  And praise Len for calling him out on it – the man may be the known as the “grumpy old one” on the panel, but he has never been unecessarily cruel and has always managed to say something constructive about every routine, no matter how terrible.  And then when Bruno was given a golden opportunity to redeem himself & apologize on the results show, what did he do? He shit on it, and then proceeded to make an even bigger spectacle of himself by making haughty comments about moving to Fox.  Michael looked like he was mortified.  But props to him for staying classy and calm about it!

Heidi: What the fuck, Bruno. Damn. Michael couldn’t dance, true. But I’m pretty sure it’s NOT your job to humiliate people who come on the show to the point that others may consider not doing it, so they can avoid that same treatment. I’m also pretty sure that if *I* felt uncomfortable watching it, that much of the rest of the audience did as well. Simon Cowell you are NOT. For all of Maks’ ill advised or misplaced bitching about the judges, he got it right when he said in an interview that if you’re auditioning for a movie role or something, give it up. And that comment about Fox?? Dude, they’ve already cast the judges for American Idol AND I’m fairly sure the slots on X-Factor are filled as well. But even worse, was on results show night – you just compounded an already uncomfortable situation. God, I felt so sorry for Michael Bolton.

Most Ironic Pre-Show Ritual: Louis’ chocolate cake consumption

Heidi: “Hey, Cheryl and Lacey, you are too heavy. Now excuse me while I scarf down some chocolate cake…it’s different for us men. We have needs.” Gee, haven’t heard that one before. I challenge you to have an ab-off with Derek or Mark or Maks or Tony. Especially Derek – since he’s been hitting the gym every morning and that will benefit me as well. :-)

Courtney: Funny to me that a man who has ridiculed both Cheryl & Lacey about their weight is the one that chows down on chocolate cake before every show.  Wonder why we have yet to see him with his shirt off…

Worst Fabricated Controversy: “Boo-gate”; (dis)honorable mention for Brandy & Maks’ perceived animosity

Courtney: Aaaaand cue the manufactured drama.  Although I think the blame for this one lies more with the fans than on those wiley producers…so many people were so quick to assume the booing was for Sarah Palin, rather than the more logical explanation that they were simply upset at Jennifer & Derek’s scores.  I mean, it seemed pretty obvious to me – the booing started immediately after the scores had been totaled.  Maybe it wasn’t as obvious to everyone else – whatever. Had it been anyone else Tom had been interviewing immediately afterward, I could almost guarantee there wouldn’t have been a “Boo-gate” (whoever came up with that moniker deserves an award…makes me giggle ;-)).  Never ceases to amaze me how people manage to manufacture drama where there is really none to be found.  And the whole “OMG Brandy & Maks hate each other!” mess? Puh-lease.  If anything, I think these two have had the best rapport of any of Maks’ partnerships…they can disagree without screaming at each other, and can joke about their mistakes.  They were buddy-buddy again 5 minutes after the alleged “blow-up”.

Heidi: Yeah, totally with you on Maks and Brandy. I think that was fan driven though, although Maks blames the producers. Wrong Maks, they didn’t edit the live show during the judges remarks – that was all you and Brandy. That said – what was the big deal? That is their relationship and it appears to work. As for the Boo-gate bullshit, my question is why DWTS worked so hard to show it wasn’t Sarah Palin getting booed. I mean, so what if she was (although everyone knew she wasn’t)? Who are they pandering to? Or are they just feeding off all the promotion-giving idiocy to get better ratings for the results show? Watching twitter after that was hilarious though – the left and right wings were killing themselves over it. The right were desperate for the booing to be for real so they could manufacture outrage at the left for booing her, thereby pumping up their base. The left assumed she was being booed because, well, most of them have booed her (myself included and with good reason). I say, “Oh boo-fricken-hoo – that audience doesn’t boo anyone but the judges but if they had booed Sarah – she’s heard worse, I’m sure. Politicians get booed, you big freakin’ babies.”

Courtney: Yah, it was a little odd how they chose to put so much effort into showing us that it wasn’t Sarah getting booed.  Regardless, I agree – it was hilarious watching the political mudslinging on Twitter.  Drama created for the sake of drama. Honestly I thought Sarah was pretty inoccuous when they were talking to her on the show – I just saw a proud mom supporting her daughter.  Too bad that everything had to get blown so far out of proportion…hopefully next week we’ll get enough “drama” from the storytelling on the dance floor that no one – producers, fans, or otherwise – will feel the need to manufacture any extra :-)

Mr. Congeniality Award – The  Situation, for his show of good sportsman ship right before the elimination, and just being a lovable dork; honorable mention for Kyle’s lovable impishness

Heidi:I thought that was very sweet and gentlemanly of the Sitch to do that. The big Goober. :-) Kyle – I will buy you a cheeseburger, you little sweetie. I also have to add that I thought it was sweet how Jennifer and Margaret seemed to wrap themselves around Michael Bolton when they were all discussing the judge thing.

Courtney: The general consensus amongst everyone around here seems to be that our buddy The Situation is turning out to be far more likeable than anyone could’ve imagined.  He’s proving to actually be a pretty humble, goofy guy, who actually seems to be taking the competition seriously and wants to grow.  I found it very charming that he took the trouble to step over to Michael & Chelsie before the elimination to shake their hands – even if Karina seemed like she was freaking out about it (god forbid they not have the dramatic, obligatory side-by-side camera view of the two possible eliminees moments before the verdict!).  And Kyle is turning out to be this season’s happy, youthful rascal who can actually dance (and has fun doing it).  Both very pleasant surprises this season :-D

Most Unintentionally Hilarious Moment: Panning to the shocked faces of various pros and celebs after Michael got his scores

Courtney: Ok, I know it was done for dramatic effect, but I couldn’t help but chuckle when they showed a montage of the slack-jawed faces of the folks backstage when Michael got his scores.  Sweet that they were so concerned for his welfare, but out of context it looks like they had all seen a naked man or something.

Heidi: They needed to add little thought clouds over their heads with the words “NO you di’int just say that!!” in them.

Courtney: Let me fill in those thought bubbles for you ;-) The Situation: “Chill out, Freckles McGee! We about to have a Situation up in here!” Rick: “You’ve just awoken a sleeping giant.  Be warned!” Mark: “How dare thee chastise my beloved’s partner! I shall challenge you to a gentlemen’s duel after I comfort the lovely Chelsie with many kisses & rose petals and perhaps a weekend in Napa Valley!”

Heidi: Aaannndddd….Heidi throws up. Did you forget I’ve been sick? I didn’t need that visual – it was bad enough Mark ran straight to Chelsie and practically ripped her out of Michael’s arms after the eviction. Jaysus, boy. Who was making cracks about Derek being lovesick? Paging Marianya!!! ;-)

Most Bizarre Pre-Show Ritual: Corky’s practice of getting intimate with the floor; honorable mention for Derek’s refridgerated double-sock ritual & Cheryl’s hand-sanitizer-in-lieu-of-deodorant ritual

Heidi: Derek, let me help you with those socks…not quite sure why they have to be cold, but whatever works for ya sweetie. :-) Cheryl does realize that the hand sanitizer is doing nothing for her in that particular location, right? That’s the point of rituals, right? It’s a mental thing. I actually think that Corky’s is (almost) the most logical – I mean, I could understand walking the floor in your bare feet, anyway. The sniffing seems more than a bit weird, though. :-)

Courtney: Walking around the floor, I can understand.  Sniffing and kissing it? Ok, now we’re in fetish territory.  I almost think Corky made that one up just so he could stand out.  He probably really does something mundane, like doing the Reader’s Digest crossword puzzle or something.  Hand sanitizer in the armpits? Meh, the antibacterial properties would have a (short-lived) diminishing effect on any odor, but it sure as hell wouldn’t keep ya Soft ‘n’ Dry.  Refridgerated socks actually would sound divine after a long day of competing or a marathon session of dance lessons.  But the fact that there’s two layers of them seem like it would kinda counteract the cooling effect, and just make your feet hotter & sweatier in the long run.  Pedicure time!

Heidi: Derek also said at one time that he’s rather….he didn’t use the word manic, but we’ll go with that…about making sure the bottoms of his shoes are not slippery. That thing we saw him doing to Jennifer’s shoes (while she’s wearing them)? Was part of that little ritual. So I imagine the double socks is part of that, so his feet don’t slide in his shoes or whatever. Hey, I never claimed that my hot blond pretend boyfriend wasn’t a bit strange. Just sayin’. :-)

The Award for the Most Limber Reality Show Host – Tom Bergeron

Heidi: We are now entering the Tom Bergeron portion of the program. :-) I have to wonder how many people it took to get him OUT of that position once he got himself into it. :-) “Tune in next week to see Tom’s Downward Facing Dog.”

Courtney: One word: Tom-a Sutra.  ;-) Cue porno music.

Heidi: I was tempted to go there but resisted the urge. Thank you, oh equally evil twin. ;-)

The Tom Bergeron Line ‘O the Night Award – “Len lecturing Bruno on how to be nice has to be a sign of the apocalypse.”

Heidi: Tom, I love ya, I do. But even you were having trouble finding the funny this week and I don’t blame you a bit. This line would have been hilarious any other time, and was a valiant effort at breaking the tension after what was a totally uncalled for series of remarks. But, awesome try, dude.

Courtney: I was squirming on the couch at home, so I can only imagine how terribly uncomfortable everyone in that ballroom had to be on performance night.  Carrie Ann looked like she might have a nervous breakdown.  Brooke looked totally confused (although that’s not really a new thing…); somebody probably had to rassle Len up a hot toddy during the commercial break.  God bless Tom for trying to do something – ANYTHING – to lighten the mood…even if the joke fell a bit flat.

The Most Awesome Production “Payback is a Bitch” Award – Whipping out Tony’s Leg Waxing Bet Video at Just the Right Time

Heidi: OMG, hilarious. Tony, word to the wise – buy your field producer cookies, the occasional beer, whatever, to avoid these problems in the future. :-) Either that, or don’t make bets on something so erratic and unpredictable as the judges on this show. I mean, really – the way these three wave their paddles you couldn’t even make a good drinking game out of it. Unless you chug every time they wave a SEVEN. :-D Yes, dude, a seven. The best part was the reaction of all the other pros and celebs.

Courtney: This, like the footage of Maks’ jumping-up-and-down-like-a-toddler temper tantrum last season, is pure GOLD to the producers – probably not worth much to begin with, but when perfect time presents itself…priceless :-D I have to wonder if the judges maybe had a bit of prior knowledge about this one…because it almost seemed TOO perfect that it went “Carrie Ann Inaba – 8, Len Goodman – 8, Bruno Tonioli – SEVEN!!!” Oh well – it was the one useful thing Bruno did on the show this week.  And Tony tweeted earlier today that the big day is Friday…so if we get any valuable twitpics, we just might have to post a “Leg-gate” update here ;-)

Cutest Display of Enthusiasm: Jennifer moving in any way she could to make the fringe on her dress shake

Courtney: I think Heidi may have mentioned it in another post, but I too was like “Why is she moving so weird?” as she was coming down the stairs.  Then I realized “Awww…she’s shimmying the fringe on her dress!” It was just too adorable…as if she was so excited to be wearing fringe that she just couldn’t bear to let it go to waste. :-)

Heidi: Yeah, that was me. I thought she was having a seizure – then I realized she was making her fringe move. She really has an inner 12 year old that presents itself at interesting times. It’s at times like that when you have to realize why Derek got Jennifer instead of Audrina, who many have mentioned as his “type”. Jennifer is he goober match. Love it. :-)

September 29, 2010 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS 11, Week 2 Media – Part I

Part One of what I’m sure will be several parts. :-)

The Insider – on Michael’s elimination.

Michael Bolton on GMA

Local Affiliate on the Elimination

Karina and the Situation on ABC Local LA Affiliate

I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS Season 11, Week 2 – Dancing by the Numbers

I have to say – this is probably the most overall likeable cast that they’ve maybe ever had. There is not one single person on this show that I don’t like and enjoy – albeit in different ways. Seriously – I love all of them in different ways. It’s also a very good competitive season, which will make things VERY interesting about 2 weeks down the road. :-) That said, I’m not quite ready to call it quits on Michael Bolton just yet. We will see. But here’s how the numbers stack up. If you want a refresher on how they determine who goes home, visit last week’s Season 11 inaugural post. :-)

The judges really tried to separate the men from the boys last night – but still seeming to try to keep the race competitive. I hate when they do that. I don’t know if it’s intentional or just accidental. I thought there was some underscoring going on. I don’t think there was any real *over* scoring, but a couple couples definitely deserved higher scores, Rick and Cheryl being one, Jennifer and Derek being another. And I would NOT have been upset if Audrina and Tony had gotten a point or two higher, even though it would have ruined that stroke of sheer brilliance that requires Tony wax his legs. :-) Genius, pure and simple. Word to the wise, be nice to the producers at all times or they will whip out footage that you will live to regret. :-) So, how did our couples do?

The Judges Scores and the corresponding percentage of points awarded:

The Judges Scores and Percentages

Place Celebrity Score Percentage
1. Jennifer 24 10.86
2. Audrina 23 10.41
3. Kyle 22 9.95
4. Bristol 22 9.95
5. Rick 21 9.5
6. Brandy 21 9.5
7. Kurt 21 9.5
8. Florence 19 8.6
9. Situation 18 8.14
10. Margaret 18 8.14
11. Michael 12 5.43

Just looking at that table, the natural assumption is that Michael is going home. But not so fast. Yes, I thought this about David and we know how that turned out, but I really believe that Michael has a solid, voting fanbase – and he’s not burned any bridges or damaged his own rep the way David has. Will it be enough for Michael to stay around? Well, I kind of doubt it, but I think it could be close.

I think that the top 7 couples shown above are likely safe. Jennifer performed amazingly well, doing what was easily the most difficult Jive choreography of the night and if YouTube views and twitter chatter are anything to go by, she’s building (or rebuilding) a pretty solid fanbase of her own. While that comes with it’s own problems (ie, people assuming she’s safe) I don’t think that is a concern for another week or two yet.

Audrina did what was easily, and far and away, the best quickstep of the night and easily the number 2 dance of the night. I think she and Jennifer were both underscored by a point or two. I think she’s safe tonight and probably for another few weeks. But she doesn’t have the excitement factor that Kyle does, and has probably an even smaller fanbase. She’s very beautiful, but she risks being boring – or too quiet might be a better word. The leg waxing thing, as painful as it will be for Tony, will help them tremendously. For now. :-) Her dress was awfully similar to Melissa’s dress, with the webbing at the top. But then Jennifer’s was similar to Nicole’s – weird.

Kyle – I counted this guy out before the seasons started and boy, was I WRONG! This kid is just plain delightful. Will he make the final four?? Well, I don’t know. I’m still inclined to say no, if only because of the powerhouse fanbases that he’s up against. He could build a fanbase in the coming weeks though.

Ah, Bristol. I can’t believe it but I really like this girl. But, despite what some righty blogs are saying, she’s unlikely to make the final four. She did a good job last night, but she’s definitely not up to the calibur of Jennifer, Audrina, Kyle, Rick and Brandy. She’s not a performer, and I think Sarah’s followers will only take her so far. I don’t think that that she earned the 22 she was given, especially not when compared to Rick Fox. But, anyway, Bristol is safe for a bit yet.

Rick-Brandy-Kurt, also known as the 21 club. One of these pairs does not belong in this group and that would be Rick and Cheryl. I think that Rick should have at least changed places with Bristol, he maybe even should have had a 23. He did a great job. Brandy was very disappointing and this is an example of why I’m always on a roller coaster with Maks – his choreography last night was just not up to par and to top it off, they both seemed either off time or out of sorts. No, I’m not talking about their squabbling (people, she was joking!) – I actually thought that was hilarious. GO Brandy!! But the speed kept changing, slow to fast to slow and there were lots of rest periods built in. Lots of breaks and they just weren’t together. Very strange – I had to watch it again to try to figure out what the problem was. But in any case, none of these three are going anywhere. Kurt? He and Anna looked adorable but their dance made no impression on me.

Now here’s where it gets interesting. The bottom four score getters. Hmmm…I’m going to say that, based on goober charm, the Situation is safe. He didn’t do a good dance, but he’s clearly TRYING and he’s oddly charming. People, don’t give me any crap about Jersey Shore (or The Hills for that matter) being hit shows guaranteeing their safety – please. These shows are popular, but they are not the ratings powerhouses you would like to believe. They get great ratings – for MTV or whatever channel they are on. But this audience isn’t likely to vote in the same numbers as the main DWTS audience. HOWEVER, both Audrina and The Situation will likely stick around for a while because SHE can dance and he’s a charming goober. :-)

That leaves us with Michael, Margaret and Florence. My gut instinct is to call Michael out just because they were SO harsh on the scoring – and the dance wasn’t good. At all. They clearly want him gone, IMO. Margaret did a much better dance than last week, and Florence made no impact but she didn’t suck. But I think he has a larger fanbase than Margaret and Florence – is it big enough?? Well, let’s go back to the numbers.

Michael versus Florence – Michael needs 32k more votes per 1 Million votes cast to beat Florence
Michael versus Margaret – Michael needs 27.2k more votes per 1 Million votes cast to beat Margaret

Conversely, to touch anyone in the top 3 Michael needs at least 45.3k more votes per million. I definitely don’t see that happening. But what about Margaret and Florence?? He only has to beat one of the in order to stay and if he’s going to beat anyone it will likely be Margaret. Will Michael get 27.2k more votes per million than Margaret?? I have no freakin’ clue. :-) I’m going to say no. You heard it here first.

September 28, 2010 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS11 Week 2 Power Rankings

Anyone else feel like this was “redux” week? As I was mentioning to Heidi on Twitter, there were several costumes, songs, and even routines that felt a bit recycled to me from previous seasons – I’m sure some of you noticed them as well.  But I won’t go into detail, because we’ll save it for the Cheesecake Awards & perhaps an edition of “Who Wore it Better?” ;-)

All dittoing aside, another great night of dancing, and I’m still astonished at how no one really & truly sucks this season…well, except for Bolton :-P ON WITH THE RANKINGS!!!

1.) Jennifer & Derek - My god, I am still in awe of how great a body this woman has at her age.  And at how well she moves! This jive was sharp, sassy, and totally adorable – Jen definitely kept up with Derek’s choreography well, and it was of course choreography that was very well-suited to each beat of the music.  She did seem to run out of steam a bit in the middle, but I can’t blame her in the slightest…poor woman must’ve been feeling faint, because it looked like someone had given her something to eat off-camera that she was still swallowing when they got their scores.  It looks like Jen is quickly becoming the sentimental favorite this season, but one really nice thing about Jen is that she also CAN ACTUALLY DANCE :-D These two seem totally safe this week – if the booing after they got their scores (which were still the highest of the week, but I agree – they should’ve been a point or two higher) is any indicator, there are a lot of fans in Jen’s camp, and they’re bound and determined to keep their girl in!

2.) Audrina & Tony – 2nd highest score of the week, and a hilarious bit about Tony having to wax his legs – plus a really well-choreographed quickstep that Audrina actually pulled off well.  I gotta give Tony props – this was some great quickstep choreography.  Very nice balance of basic steps and flashier tricks.  Audrina definitely improved this week, and seemed to be a bit more comfortable moving her body this time. Still seems a bit tentative with her movements (and still not a lot of facial expressions), which I’m hoping continues to improve week after week.  And DAMN – Audrina has got some wicked abs.  I noticed them last week, but something about her dress this week just really drew my eyes to them. Great performance, great score, and great comedy.  People will remember them, and memorability (is that a word? Call me Mama Palin ;-) ) equals votes.  These two should be safe.

3.) Kyle & Lacey – There were two male contestants that had the hens in my office all a-twitter (and not actually on Twitter – half of them don’t even know what it is) last week – and Kyle was one of them.  Can’t blame them – this kid is an absolute RIOT out on that floor.  I always find myself so amused by him, his facial expressions, and the gusto with which he attacks each step.  Is his technique impeccable? Hell no, but then again I don’t think any of Lacey’s partners have been praised heavily for their technique – if there’s one pro that can help their partner get by solely on showmanship, it’s Lacey.  Luckily, though, Kyle does have some degree of skill…some skills I hope he continues to develop as the show progresses, because I have a feeling the judges may grow a bit weary of his sometime-sloppy (but very enthusiastic!) approach.  Pretty sure their presence in the bottom 2 last week was a complete ruse, and these two will be one of the first announced as safe this week – especially with some very weak scores by other contestants lurking out there…

4.) Rick & Cheryl – This man continues to astound me, not only with that GORGEOUS megawatt smile of his (mmmm :-D) but also by his busting of every single stereotype there is on the show about very tall men.  That jive was good, PERIOD.  Not just “good for someone that’s 6-foot-7″ – he was light, he was crisp, he was on-time, and he was having a great time.  It was a delight to watch – both he and Kurt are the two guys who give me warm fuzzies everytime they dance, because they seem like the two that are just so daggone happy to be there that they could get the lowest score of the week and still thank the judges for the opportunity to dance.  I actually Rick & Cheryl were underscored a bit (Heidi concurs), but 21 is still a solid score, especially with the points spread so wide this week (I’ll leave it to my cohort to elaborate).  They also have the boon of going first, which always helps.

5.) Bristol & Mark – If you had told me in the preseason that I’d be ranking these two this high, I would have laughed quite heartily before offering you a great deal on some swampland in Florida :-) But something about Bristol seems very endearing and likeable, and a part of me is really wanting to see her do well on the show.  This quickstep was pretty damn simple, yes, and probably overscored a bit; but Bristol seemed to roll with the punches (from Mark’s nose, hehe) quite well this week, and came across as very classy in this dance.  She held her own and stayed on time. Loved her dress – thought she looked really pretty this week, in a very age-appropriate, understated way.  Also seemed to love the way that she seemed to quietly laugh and shake her head like “Oh, mom” whenever Mama Palin talked.  The simple fact that they got the coveted pimp spot this week tells me that they may be pulling in far more votes than we initially thought they were – I’m calling these two as safe for at least the next 2 weeks, especially if Bristol continues to improve.

6.) Brandy & Maks – Erm.  Little bit of a stutter from these two this week – I don’t think the jive was really Brandy’s dance, as she definitely seemed to struggle to keep up and they did get off-time in a few spots.  The parts where she was in control (like her solo, which I’m not sure was a very good choice choreographically – judges didn’t seem to like it), this girl looked great, and seemed like she was having the time of her life; unfortunately, those seemed outnumbered by the parts where she looked bewildered and out of breath.  Had to chuckle a bit when Brandy pointed the finger at Maks for some iffy choreo, but also have to respect him for owning it – as opposed to throwing a shirt ;-) I think Brandy may one of the rare ladies that actually does better in the ballroom dances than the Latin ones, so hopefully she can recuperate with a foxtrot next week.  I’m thinking Maks’ fanbase (which, if my office is any indicator, seems to have grown exponentially since last week!) will keep these two safe for awhile, but hopefully Brandy will improve – because with a competition this tight, it will turn out to be the battle of the fanbases.

7.) Kurt & Anna – Ahhh, my little ray of redheaded sunshine and her equally as lovable partner J Seriously – could this guy be any more adorable, and just an all-around class act? I actually really liked this jive too – Kurt kept up, his moves were clean, and he seemed to have a lot of fun with it.  LOVED Anna’s costume! Wasn’t quite as tacky as I had hoped, but oh well – I’ll take good dancing over tacky themes if I can get it ;-) This was a vast improvement over last week.  Kurt will likely have the NFL vote behind him for at least a few more weeks, and possibly more – if he improves from week-to-week like he did this time, he could actually make it to the semifinals.  Team Evanna from last season seems to also be heavily throwing their support behind Team Kurtanna (poor Anna, there just aren’t a whole lot of creative team names to be made with a name like hers!), so these two will likely be safe as we weed out some of the less-skilled, less popular celebs.

8.) The Situation & Karina - I’ve got him this high solely because everyone seems to think he’s a riot, and look forward to hearing the crazy stuff he says each week.  I really have to shake my head & chuckle a bit about the Sitch – for as much machismo and swagger as this guy throws around, he is completely INEPT when it comes to dancing – and he knows it, which is actually kind of endearing.  Gotta give him props for effort – even if that effort doesn’t translate to a whole lot of success on the floor.  This was pretty damn shuffly and out of step, but I did enjoy some of the more athletic parts – the little catch at the end was pretty cool.  One thing that was very interesting to me – the Sitch seems to almost have the opposite problem of many of the guys on the show, in that he holds his frame too high as opposed to letting it crumble.  Anywho, these two got a decent spot in the running order, and I think he’s still got the novelty factor on his side – but he will need to improve FAST in order to keep up with the Joneses in this competition.  Interested to see his paso doble – I feel like it could be a turning point for him.

9.) Florence & Corky – Sorry, but I am just not feeling these two AT ALL.  Blah. They do nothing for me – this routine was pretty damn boring, and it seemed like they were moving painfully slow for a quickstep.  Ill-received comedy – blech.  Uncomfortable shuffling and hauling Flo around the floor – blech.  Corky is kinda disappointing me this season with his choreo – can’t believe I’m saying this, but I actually preferred some of the stuff he gave Cloris to some of the stuff he’s giving Flo.  At least she seems to have reigned in some of the awkward behavior this week.  These two could possibly be in trouble, due to a bad running order position (the dreaded #2) and a relatively low score.  But I think they’ll barely make it in under the wire, due to some REEEALLLY low scoring from certain others…

10.) Margaret & Louis – Props to Louis for not going for the slapstick comedy this week, but unfortunately this seemed rather unmemorable to me.  I actually have to disagree with both Louis & Carrie Ann – Marge’s facial expressions would’ve improved this dance, which otherwise seemed just…blah.  Yes, Marge did keep up pretty well, but she was pretty heavy on her feet and the choreo wasn’t super hard. Overall, kinda low energy.  I think they could be in more danger this week than last week, due to sheer boredom on the part of the voters, but if their near-miss last week was any indicator, they may have more fans than we think.  Likely in the bottom two; but could get ousted if there’s a miracle pulled off by…

11.) Michael & Chelsie - To quote my good friend Brian, who was texting me during the show: “It’s rare when I actually feel embarassed for someone, but that did it.” Ooh wee – this was painful to watch.  I could tell Chelsie had thrown in the towel when she proposed that Michael come out of a doghouse at the beginning of their routine.  Self-fulfilling prophecy, perhaps? I’m not sure he’s even TRYING at this point…the odd semi-fight with Chelsie just made him seem kinda uptight to me, and I don’t even feel like he’s moving during his performances.  My mom is convinced he’s deliberately trying to get sent home.  I don’t think it was the WORST jive I’ve ever seen on the show (Master P’s will forever be the worst in my eyes), but it’s damn near close.  Without doing the detailed math (I’ll leave that to Heidi), these two are gonna have to pull off a voting miracle in order to overcome the ridiculous point spread – and while I think Michael still may make women want to doff their undergarmets, I’m not sure its enough to counteract such a terrible score.  I’m actually kinda hoping these two go home – it’s hard for me to watch Michael looked pained out on the floor, and it’s hard for me to see Chelsie have to put up with it.  Sayonara, Bolton.

Ok folks, what say you? Will Michael make it out of the doghouse to foxtrot next week? Will Marge & Louis’ cautious routine be their undoing? Will Jenougher get the encore – can they even make it through a repeat performance? Will the Cheesecake Awards be epic? Let me answer that last one: YES. :-D

September 27, 2010 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS 11 Stat Class – Week 2

One week has come and gone… and with it a celeb. The Hoff, it seems, couldn’t cut the rug. And I was so hoping that he would stick around a bit longer. Ah well.

From the judges’ comments of last Monday’s show, we know that the Jive or the Quickstep would be performed this week. But who is dancing what? Well considering it is only the second week, I’m going to go out on a limb and say that whoever did the Viennese Waltz last week will perform the Jive this week, and those that performed the ChaCha last week will have the Quickstep this week…

QUICKSTEP
Florence Henderson & Corky Ballas
Since Corky has yet to show his prowess with the Quickstep, we are going to attempt to use data from more “mature” actresses.
– Tony & Jane Seymour (Season 5/Week 7): 24/30
– Fabian & Marlee Matlin (Season 6/Week 2): 24/30
– Damian & Pamela Anderson (Season 10/Week 5): 21/30
Predicted Score: 20/30

Kyle Massey & Lacey Schwimmer
– Lacey & Lance Bass (Season 7/Week 1): 21/30
– Lacey & Mark Decascos (Season 9/Week 2): 21/30
With so little information… how did the other Disney related folks do?
– Louis & Monique Coleman (Season 3/Week 7): 27/30
– Mark & Sabrina Bryan (Season 5/Week 2): 23/30
– Julianne & Cody Linley (Season 7/Week 1): 23/30
Predicted Score: 22/30

Bristol Palin & Mark Ballas
– Mark & Sabrina Bryan (Season 5/Week 2): 23/30
– Mark & Kristi Yamaguchi (Season 6/Week 8): 29/30
– Mark & Shawn Johnson (Season 8/Week 9): 27/30
Again, with so little info, let’s so how some of the “celebs” in the “others” group have fared…
– Kym & Penn Jilette (Season 6/Week 2): 17/30
– Karina & Steve Wozniak (Season 8/Week 2): 17/30
Predicted Score: 21/30

Audrina Patridge & Tony Dovolani
– Tony & Stacy Keibler (Season 2/Week 7): 27/30
– Tony & Jane Seymour (Season 5/Week 7): 24/30
– Tony & Marissa Jaret Winokur (Season 6/Week 2): 21/30
– Tony & Susan Lucci (Season 7/Week 1): 22/30
– Tony & Melissa Rycroft (Season 8/Week 10): 28/30
– Tony & Kathy Ireland (Season 9/Week 2): 18/30
Predicted score: 23/30

Mike Sorrentino & Karina Smirnoff
– Karina & Mario Lopez (Season 3/Week 2): 21/30
– Karina & Billy Ray Cyrus (Season 4/Week 2): 21/30
– Karina & Floyd Mayweather Jr (Season 5/Week 2): 18/30
– Karina & Mario (Season 6/Week 2): 26/30
– Karina & Steve Wozniak (Season 8/Week 2): 17/30
– Karina & Aaron Carter (Season 9/Week 2): 27/30
Predicted score: 22/30

JIVE
Michael Bolton & Chelsie Hightower
– Chelsie & Ty Murray (Season 8/Week 6): 18/30
– Chelsie & Louie Vito (Season 9/Week 2): 19/30
– Chelsie & Jake Pavelka (Season 10/Week 2): 20/30
To help with predicting this score… let’s look at more “mature” singers/entertainers…
– Kym & Donny Osmond (Season 9/Week 2): 25/30
Predicted score: 19/30

Margaret Cho & Louis van Amstel
– Louis & Lisa Rinna (Season 2/Week 3): 15/30
– Louis & Monique Coleman (Season 3/Week 3): 27/30
– Louis & Kelly Osbourne (Season 9/Week 8): 26/30
– Louis & Niecy Nash (Season 10/Week 5): 18/30
Predicted score: 20/30

Rick Fox & Cheryl Burke
– Cheryl & Drew lachey (Season 2/Week 3): 27/30
– Cheryl & Emmitt Smith (Season 3/Week 6): 25/30
– Cheryl & Ian Ziering (Season 4/Week 3): 24/30
– Cheryl & Cristian de la Fuente (Season 6/Week 3): 25/30
– Cheryl & Maurice Greene (Season 7/Week 3): 24/30
– Cheryl & Gilles Marini (Season 8/Week 6): 26/30
– Cheryl & Chad Ochocinco (Season 10/Week 8): 24/30
Predicted score: 24/30

Jennifer Grey & Derek Hough
– Derek & Jennie Garth (Season 5/Week 8): 24/30
– Derek & Shannon Elizabeth (Season 6/Week 3): 24/30
– Derek & Brooke Burke (Season 7/Week 9): 21/30
– Derek & Lil Kim (Season 8/Week 6): 28/30
– Derek & Joanna Krupa (Season 9/Week 2): 20/30
– Derek & Nicole Scherzinger (Season 10/Week 2): 28/30
Predicted score: 24/30

Brandy & Maksim Chmerkovskiy
– Maksim & Willa Ford (Season 3/Week 3): 22/30
– Maksim & Laila Ali (Season 4/Week 8): 26/30
– Maksim & Mel B (Season 5/Week 3): 27/30
– Maksim & Erin Andrews (Season 10/Week 5): 22/30
Predicted score: 23/30

Kurt Warner & Anna Trebunskaya
– Anna & Jerry Rice (Season 2/Week 3): 19/30
– Anna & Evan Lysacek (Season 10/Week 2): 24/30
Let’s add in the other NFLers… =D
– Cheryl & Emmitt Smith (Season 3/Week 6): 25/30
– Edyta & Jason Taylor (Season 6/Week 3): 23/30
– Kym & Warren Sapp (Season 7/Week 8): 26/30
– Edyta & Lawrence Taylor (Season 8/Week 6): 22/30
– Cheryl & Chad Ochocinco (Season 10/Week 8): 24/30
Predicted score: 22/30

So how did I do? Stay tuned for the show tonight and find out!

I Written By

My life can be summed up in the following two quotes: 1) "I am married to engineering and am its faithful wife by day, but at night my wanderlust takes hold and the arts becomes my jealous paramour." and... 2) "Engineering is my safety net. Writing is my passion. Acting is my escape when the other two become too much." So where does dancing fit in? Pretty much anywhere at this point... =)

DWTS 11, Week 2 – Who’s Dancing What…and When

The dances for the week are Quickstep and Jive – kinda crazy for week 2, but maybe that’s just me. :-) It appears that everyone who did the Viennese Waltz is doing the Jive, everyone who did the Cha Cha is doing the Quickstep. HOWEVER, all the pros and their celeb partners are being suspiciously silent on the dance order – it also seems that camera blocking happened later today than normal so maybe that’s all there is to it. Whatever, we don’t have ANY of the dance order yet, So check back as I will update if and when I find out.

ETA: TMZ claims they have the songs the couples are dancing to, as well as the dance (beat you guys on the dance, neener neener :-) ).

ETA 2: It has been suggested that the TMZ order in which they list the dancers/dance/song is the dance order as well, since Kurt is going 9th and Rick is going first – which mimicks the order that TMZ has them in. So I’ve rearranged the couples in that order, below. When it’s actually confirmed (if), I’ll type it in bold. Which would make Courtney incorrect as it puts Derek/Jennifer at the top of the hour (6th place). :-) The Sitch and Karina in the pimp spot, eh? That means one of two things. :-)

These are the dances the couples are doing per their twitter accounts:

Rick and Cheryl – Jive
Dancing 1st

Florence and Corky – Quickstep

Brandy and Maks – Jive

Michael and Chelsie – Jive

Audrina and Tony – Quickstep

Jennifer and Derek – Jive

Margaret and Louis – Jive

Kyle and Lacey – Quickstep

Kurt and Anna – Jive
Dancing 9th

Bristol and Mark – Quickstep

The Sitch and Karina – Quickstep

According to Louis’s facebook/twitter, next week is storyline week and he’s praying that the music they are given “fits” the storyline ideas that he and Margaret have. Oh dear. I really don’t like storyline week, much.

In other news, Jonathan and Anna are working on a Pro dance for the first results show in October. :-)

September 26, 2010 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS 11, Week 1 – The Week in Entertainment News, Part III

Sabrina – Behind the Scenes of DWTS

Rick and Cheryl dance on Ellen!

Access Hollywood with The Situation and Karina

Dancers (MARK) will change clothes anywhere anytime. :-)

Mark and Bristol on ET in Alaska

I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)