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DWTS Season 12, Week 3 – Who’s Dancing What…and When?

Okay, this could be one crazy week, for sure. :-) The celebs are telling a story that’s personal to them? Oh dear. This rarely bodes well. I can’t say that I’m a fan of this theme. But then, most of you know I’m not a fan of themes in general, although I did like the acoustic night that wasn’t. That will probably be the one they don’t do again. :-)

Now, does someone want to explain to me why we get FIVE rumbas and a hodgepodge (tm Len) for the remaining dances?? What on earth? It’s only week 3, it’s not like they’re running out of dances. Someone clue me in here. I can’t even guess what is going on – at first I thought all the top dancers were getting rumba and everyone else was getting something that played to their strengths. But then I saw that Hines has Samba and Chelsea has Cha Cha – arguably dances that will play to their strengths. They included Kendra in with the rumbas, so that also shot that theory. So, are Ralph and Kirstie so dominating the voting that they were given the rumba, while Hines and Chelsea need a little help so they got more uptempo dances? Same principle applies to Ray? The waltz definitely benefits Petra better than a Samba or a Rumba would. The only explanation I can come up with for this random set up is that it’s not random at all and it’s a bit of deck stacking to level the playing field – or attempting to. After all they got SO much attention with “shocking” eliminations…lord, I’m such a cynic. :-) Hey…anyone got a better explanation?? Back in the day, 3 years ago, they had two dances and you did one or the other. :-)

Ralph and Karina – Rumba
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.08

Kenda and Louis – Rumba – Dancing 4th per Louis
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.07

Chelsea and Mark – Cha Cha Cha
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.01

Wendy and Tony – Foxtrot – Dancing 1st (Per Wendy’s twitter – Thanks Greg)
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.02

Kirstie and Maks – Rumba- Dancing 9th, per Maks’ twitter
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.11

Romeo and Chelsie – Rumba
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.05

Chris and Cheryl – Rumba -Dancing 3rd per Cheryl’s twitter
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.09

Hines and Kym – Samba
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.03

Sugar Ray and Anna – Paso Doble - Dancing 8th Per Anna’s facebook (thanks Suzanne)
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.06

Petra and Dmitry – Waltz
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.04

Now for some girl bonding. :-)

Chelsea has her eye on the prize…

April 3, 2011 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS 12 – Dancing With The Stars Backgrounds and Time Warps (Videos)

Good Morning America did a cool spread on the dancing couples before they hit the dance floor. It shows them were they just little to now….including some of our pros. Really cute.

On a related note, Len Goodman explains why all three judges are important with each of their backgrounds and how it makes the judging panel unique as a whole. He explains why he wants the couples to stick to the rules of Ballroom dancing versus all the modern-day theatrics. Carrie Ann and Bruno explain their dancing backgrounds before they did the show and what think is important when judging as well.

March 30, 2011 I Written By

I'm a fashion and music fan....and I have always loved dancing too of any kind. Dancing With The Stars seems to have this way of bringing all of those things together. One of my favorite dancing quotes at the moment: "No matter what, nobody can take away the dance you've already had...." ~Gleb Savchenko . For fun music and dance mixes, visit WilUnleashed Soundcloud.

DWTS 2011 – The Dancing With The Stars Cast After The Results Show Week 2 (Videos)

PopTVDotCom has a fun video up of some the cast out on the town after the results show. Check out what Tom Bergeron’s says about the “Deer Hunting Lights” and the “Velcro suit”. LOL. Maks is a hoot too for what he says on making babies with Kirstie.

Edit To Add: Here are a couple of more videos of the stars after the show being interviewed by the paparazzi. These are good too!

I Written By

I'm a fashion and music fan....and I have always loved dancing too of any kind. Dancing With The Stars seems to have this way of bringing all of those things together. One of my favorite dancing quotes at the moment: "No matter what, nobody can take away the dance you've already had...." ~Gleb Savchenko . For fun music and dance mixes, visit WilUnleashed Soundcloud.

Dancing With The Stars 2011 – Costume Designer Wanted To Interpret Icons Ginger Rogers, Veronica Lake, and Donna Reed

And I’d say he did just THAT! Stylist has a new article up for how Randall Christensen came up with the “retro” costuming this week. Here is take, but, be sure to read more at the link.

Kirstie Alley: Just two weeks into the competition, Christensen says he’s already altering dresses to make them smaller for the former “Fat Actress” star who has pledged to shed 40 pounds dancing. Such was the case with the sublime ballgown he designed in a peachy shade of Alley’s choosing. “Kirstie is a wonderful example of how hard work and dedication will pay off with a more sleek body,” he says. “Dancing just makes the body more toned, which forces the costumes to be taken in and in and in!”

Kendra Wilkinson: Christensen let Ginger Rogers inspire Wilkinson’s royal blue and fuchsia ballgown with elbow length hand-dyed gloves. Despite the Playmate’s fears of not seeming lady-like, “I actually think Kendra channeled some of that Old Hollywood glamor,” Christensen says. “Because of that she had a wonderful payoff this week.”

Ralph Macchio: Christensen’s team sewed more than 10,000 hematite crystals on the former “Karate Kid’s” bedazzzled jacket.

Petra Nemcova: The model, once again, played an active role in designing the red and yellow vintage-inspired dress and wide-brimmed hat that was a nod to Brinkley’s turn in ex-husband Billy Joel’s “Uptown Girl” music video. Nemcova ripped the dress skirt off mid-jive to reveal her model frame. “We had to have a hot and sexy skirt for the reveal and what’s hotter than a red mini-skirt with tons of beaded fringe?”

Below are some pictures of the Dancing With The Stars Hair Team getting Karina and Petra ready for Monday night.

So, if you had to pick your favorite costumes this week, which would they be? My faves were Kenda and Kym!!

I Written By

I'm a fashion and music fan....and I have always loved dancing too of any kind. Dancing With The Stars seems to have this way of bringing all of those things together. One of my favorite dancing quotes at the moment: "No matter what, nobody can take away the dance you've already had...." ~Gleb Savchenko . For fun music and dance mixes, visit WilUnleashed Soundcloud.

DWTS Season 12, Week 2 – Dancing by the Numbers

Well, a little bit of a shake up on the leader board – the top three and the bottom two remain the same, but a bit of juggling in the middle. Last week, Chelsea was solidly in 4th place, but she has fallen to 6th place due to out of the box choreography by Mark – as predicted in the comments by yours truly. It didn’t help her that others upped their game. Great dance, not enough Jive – where have I heard that before? :-) At least Len’s a tiny bit consistent – although he let that monkey thing go last season. Still haven’t gotten over that. Where was I…?

The Judges Scores and Percentages

Place Celebrity Score Percentage
1. Ralph 45 10.61
2. Hines 44 10.38
3. Kirstie 43 10.14
4. Chris 42 9.91
5. Romeo 42 9.91
6. Chelsea 39 9.2
7. Kendra 37 8.73
8. Petra 36 8.49
9. Sugar Ray 34 8.25
10. Wendy 31 7.31
11. Mike 30 7.08

What did I love? As I said before, I thought that Chelsea and Mark’s dance was a great dance but somewhat lacking in Jive content…but my faves are currently the Top 3. I’m afraid I have a mad crush on Ralph AND Hines and I wanna be Kirstie when I grow up. Way to go, girl – lay a big wet one on the goofy Russian. :-) Seriously, there is no one I dislike on this cast at all (for now, anyway) and I actually enjoyed most of them for one reason or another.

Hee…someone owes me a drink. Mark did have polka dots (his tie, her panties) and short pants. :-) It was different than his norm, but they were still present. Loved Chelsea’s outfit, though, which is VERY unusual for Mark’s Jive costumes. :-)

Chris jumps up to fourth place!! What an improvement on all fronts – love his British accent too. :-) Speaking of accents, how much do I love Kym Johnson?? Talking street with Hines in that little girl Aussie accent. :-) Kendra also improved and I thought she looked lovely – and I felt for her tonight. She did go a long way though to busting out of that stereotype the show (and Louis) have been trying to stick her in. Wendy also improved, but Tony put in too much crap at the beginning – took too long for the dance to get started.

Who’s going home?? Well, I’m going to say that Ralph, Hines, Kirstie and Chelsea are safe, no problem. Chelsea got raked by Len which generally means her and Mark’s fans will go insane with the voting. Ralph, Hines and Kirstie just have too much of a spread from Mike to be in any danger at all. Barring shock of shocks, of course.

The person in the greatest danger is, of course, Mike – he of the gorgeous smile.  He improved this week a lot, but he suffers from being relatively unknown. His strength is that he has Lacey as a partner and she’s pretty popular…and he’s gorgeous and funny.  What does he have to do to stick around?  Well, he needs about 2,360 more votes per million votes cast to stay over Wendy. Is this likely? Not really, judging by what people say about Wendy’s fanbase.

So who else could go if Mike gets votes and Wendy does as well?  Well, I think Petra is in a lot more danger than either Sugar Ray or Wendy. It’s the Audrina syndrome all over again, although Audrina was a much better dancer.  Petra, beautiful and sweet, just gets lost in a sea of bigger personalities and her dance was not nearly as good as the judges made it out to be. Her Jive made me think of Shannon Elizabeth – but Dmitry is a lot quieter than Derek. Don’t get me wrong – I love Petra. But I worry for her. What would it take for Petra to leave over the bottom three?? ALL of the following must happen for Petra to leave:

Mike gets 14155 more votes per million votes cast; and

Wendy gets 11800 more votes per million votes cast; and

Ray gets 4728 more votes per million votes cast.

Will this happen? Nah, probably not. :-) I think Wendy and Ray can get the votes, but I don’t think Mike can muster it up – at least not that much.  He’s just not well known enough, IMO, to get upwards of 14k more votes than her.

Sooooo….I think this is a fairly easy call: Bye Mike, I will miss your gorgeous smile. :-)

March 29, 2011 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS Season 12 Week 2- The Couples Reactions After Their Dance (Videos)

We have some fun interviews after the show from ABC in Los Angeles to share with you with the couples reactions to their second dances and more. This interviewer has to be one of my favorites. He doesn’t ask dumb questions and he seems to really know the show. He seems like a true fan as much as we are. So, let’s get right to it.

Here’s a recap;

Mike and Lacey felt better about their performance. They hope they can continue and build on it, but, Mike’s afraid tonight will be his last night.;

Kirstie wasn’t as pleased with her performance. She thought she could do better. Her and Maks also talk about their spontaneous kiss when asked about it and get embarrassed. They can’t stop laughing. It’s so cute.

Chris is getting more comfortable on the show. They had so much fun and met their goals. Cheryl mentions what an even competition it is this year.

Kym praises Hines for doing so well last night. She’s so proud to have him as a partner. He says he’s going to keep working as hard as he can and doing whatever she says.

Romeo wanted to tackle the criticism from last week and it made him work that much harder. Chelsie was so pleased when Len said they had the best dance of the night.

Petra says she’s having the most fun. She just wants to keep ‘living in the moment’ and ‘dance with a purpose’ as long as she can.

Mark and Chelsea talk about ‘taking a chance’ and they have no regrets even after the judges disapproving of their dance. Mark said their performance felt powerful and really good. He also thinks the judges should have scolded him and not Chelsea. They should have given her the score she deserved. The pop song they gave him inspired him to design the choreography. (after hearing his side, I can definitely understand how he was inspired now)

Kendra wasn’t satisfied with their dance. They plan to keep working hard and Louis says it’s ok to screw up and she needs to get over her fears. Next week he wants to show people how hot her legs are. 8O

Karina couldn’t be more pleased with having Ralph as a partner. He understands her even when she doesn’t speak. Ralph says she pushed him and he is glad and wants to keep being challenged to do his very very best.

Sugar Ray wants to keep working on his technique and getting better. Anna talks about how important it is to “feel” everything he’s learning and the scores will come.

Wendy defends her dance last week and feels she’s been moving in the right direction from the start. But, it’s been a challenge with how busy she is. Tony says we wouldn’t believe how much Wendy has improved since they met and that’s what matters.

Shew! What a night!! I don’t want to see any of them go yet. :(

I Written By

I'm a fashion and music fan....and I have always loved dancing too of any kind. Dancing With The Stars seems to have this way of bringing all of those things together. One of my favorite dancing quotes at the moment: "No matter what, nobody can take away the dance you've already had...." ~Gleb Savchenko . For fun music and dance mixes, visit WilUnleashed Soundcloud.

DWTS Season 12, Week 2 – Who’s Dancing What…and When?

From what I hear, our week 2 dances are the Quickstep and the Jive. Presumably, those who danced Foxtrot last week will be dancing Jive this week and those who had Cha Cha will be dancing Quickstep. Important to note – each couple keeps the same phone number throughout the competition and they will no longer coincide with dance order (if they did last week…I never checked). The only way we will know dance order is if the celebs or their pros tweet it over the next day or so. Check back here often, I’ll add info as it becomes available.

ETA: Programming Note - President Obama is scheduled to speak at 7:30 pm Eastern time (6:30 Central) and is supposedly going to be done in 30 minutes. This should not impact DWTS. If he goes over, the show is LIIIVE (tm Tom Bergeron) in the Eastern and Central time zones, so I think they can just delay the start of the show by however long he goes over. They delay programming all the time, I see no reason why they wouldn’t tonight.  It should have no impact whatsoever on the Mountain and Pacific time zones, unless they get the President on tape too. :-) UPDATE: According to Louis’ Twitter, he’s spoken to the producers and has been assured that the president’s speech will not go over time. Phew!

Ralph and Karina – Jive
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.08

Kenda and Louis – Quickstep
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.07 – dancing 2nd, per Louis’ Twitter.

Chelsea and Mark – Jive
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.01
Poor Chelsea. LOL :-)

Mark's sense of style is rubbing off on me. I can't decide how I feel about that. @ Team KanenBall Dance HQ http://gowal.la/p/cCCo #photo
@ChelseaKane
Chelsea Kane

Mike and Lacey – Jive
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.10

Wendy and Tony – Quickstep
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.02

Kirstie and Maks – Quickstep
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.11

Romeo and Chelsie – Quickstep
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.05

Chris and Cheryl – Quickstep
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.09

Hines and Kym – Quickstep
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.03

Sugar Ray and Anna – Jive
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.06 - dancing 1st, per Anna’s Twitter.

Petra and Dmitry – Jive
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.04

And we get a tiny hint about “The Troupe” from Peta:

Out the door for Camera Blocking on the Troupes first 2 dances!!! Now where's the coffee??
@PetaMurgatroyd
Peta Murgatroyd
March 27, 2011 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS Season 12, Week 1 – Dancing by the Numbers

A new season, a whole new set of calculating and prognosticating. To anyone new to this site, this is one of the series that we’ve been carrying on for a few seasons now; if you want to read what the calculations were for previous seasons, you should be able to find them by searching “dancing by the numbers”. You can find last season’s starting here —> Dancing by the Numbers Season 11.

Anyway, what I do in this series is calculate the standings according to the rules of DWTS. The way DWTS works is, each dancer is given a score. That score is then divided by the total number of points awarded on that night; that is, all the couple’s scores added together. That yields a percentage for each couple which counts for HALF of their combined score, the audience vote being the other half. The audience vote is handled the same way; the total number of votes cast is divided into the number of votes for a given couple, yielding their percentage of the audience votes. The judges percentage is added to the audience percentage for a combined total score. The couple with the lowest combined score goes home.

Now, we’re talking about first week scores with no elimination in the first week. The couples get a chance to dance again before anyone is eliminated. As a result, this is just a “where we stand before Dance number 2″ post – absolutely everything could change after the second dance. Consider this a practice post. :-)

So, what are our Judges percentages??

Dancers Percentage of the Judges scores

Ralph = 11.54%
Kirstie = 11.06%
Hines = 10.10%
Chelsea = 10.10%
Chris = 9.13%
Romeo = 9.13%
Petra = 8.65%
Sugar Ray = 8.65%
Kendra = 8.65%
Wendy = 6.73%
Mike = 6.25%

Obviously, Mike and Wendy are in the most danger going into week 2. I think Wendy is likely safe based solely on being more well known than Mike is – which is a shame because I found Mike to be relatively funny and definitely cute. Wendy? I dunno, I felt bad for Tony (whether he deserves it or not :-) ) because she seems kinda like a mess already.

Barring disaster, Ralph, Kirstie, Hines and Chelsea are likely to be very, very safe. I’m going to guess that their week 2 dances won’t change that. What can change is the middle of the pack and the bottom of the pack; everyone is switching from latin to ballroom or vice versa and the change in style could have a severe impact on the weaker dancers. Of course, if any of the 4 I mentioned crash badly, they’ll be in trouble too – but they benefit from going into week 2 with fairly high scores.

For example, Mike as the low scorer is 3.85% away from Hines and Chelsea, who are tied for 3rd place. This equates to 38.5k votes. As a relative unknown, Mike is unlikely to catch either Hines or Chelsea. Same goes for Ralph and Kirstie.

As for Wendy, the difference between her and Mike is only 0.48%, which equates to 4,810 votes. This is practically equivalent to zero if we were talking about two celebrities who were on equal footing…but we’re not. We’ll have to wait and see how both Mike and Wendy do on dance number 2, but it’s hard for me to believe that Mike, a relative unknown, can make up that differential. Now, if he kicks butt on his next dance and Wendy doesn’t?? All bets are off. :-)

On to Monday! I usually post my stats on Tuesday morning – check back here to see how we do. :-)

I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

Dancing with the Stars Season 12, Week 1 – The Cheesecake Awards!!

We’re Baaaaack!!! It’s easy, it’s cheesey, it’s Dancing With The Stars!!! For those new to this site, Courtney and I hand out weekly awards for the funniest, cheesiest and occassionally most annoying aspects of this show. Sometimes we’re serious, sometimes we’re silly…and sometimes we’re dirty. Well, I’m dirtier than Courtney. More practice. :-) Mostly, we pick on the show and all the people involved in it. WARNING: if you are a hypersensitive fan of someone on the show, check your sensitivity at the door. We even pick on the people WE like. :-)

On with the show…

The Award for Most Unintended Innuendo: Chelsea Kane

Heidi: This is mostly my brain at work on a glass (or two) of wine. When Chelsea says, “Yes, I got to kiss Joe Jonas. It didn’t suck” I confess my first thought was “Oh, you poor thing, he didn’t….” Oh. Wait. Totally not what she’s talking about.

Courtney: Pretty sure the purity ring would have gotten in the way.

Award for Most Intended Innuendo (That Went Over Most Everyone’s Head): Bruno to Chelsea – “You started on your back, you ended on your back, and everything in between was pure afterglow!”

Courtney: Was I the only one who raised an eyebrow to this? ;-) Somehow I think Bruno might have gotten the order mixed up a bit, though…doesn’t the afterglow come after the main event, and not during? Then again, maybe my boudoir adventures have tended towards the tame…or maybe Bruno likes to do things completely out of order.  Best part: I don’t think Mark or Chelsea really picked up on the blantant innuendo of it…or if they did, they played it off quite well.  Can’t imagine that Mark didn’t pick up on that one…;-)

Heidi: Oh, all my eyebrows were raised. :-) And where the hell was Tommy B. in this?? No way did he let that comment slide! Oh, Wait. He saw the purity ring and figured it was pointless. Or more uncomfortable. As for Mark, well, he’s been thinking about that for a while…

Award for the Earliest Start to a Showmance: Mark Ballas

Heidi: Kissing, rolling around on the floor, teasing…dude has a thing for chaste girls named Chelsea (ie)? ;-) How long until he whips out the guitar and serenades her to calm her down?

Courtney: This may be a record even for Mark – getting smoochy with his partner during their first rehearsal?! What’s the next step…canoodling in the Celebraquarium? Or do we move directly to the weekends in Napa/rosepetals on the bed/satin sheets phase of the relationship?

Heidi: You forgot the candles.

The Award for Most Hip Analogy by a Sixty Year Old: Len Goodman and his BEP reference.

Heidi: So, in Len’s mind the BEP are a crazy mess? Because I’m pretty sure that when he said Chelsea’s Foxtrot went all “Black Eyed Peas” in the middle, it was NOT a compliment. :-)

Courtney: Blech.  I hate the Peas. And Len is right – they’re a crazy mess.  Didn’t you see the Superbowl??? They had to bring in Usher midway through the performance to save the day. Almost as hot a mess as Xtina flubbing the national anthem…almost.

Heidi: Oh, they were indeed a mess – interesting analogy for good ole Len, though. :-)

The Award for Most Schizophrenic Backstage Crew Members (AKA: Award for Backstage Crew Members with an Unhealthy Fixation on the Three Bears): The Hair Department.

Heidi: I found Anna’s hair to be TOO BIG, but Lacey’s hair was too small…while Petra’s hair was juuuust right. Seriously, how can they do such a beautiful job on Petra’s hair (and others) then go so huge on Anna that her head looks like it belongs in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade? And me thinks they just avoid Lacey altogether cause that girl looked like she hadn’t seen shampoo in a month. L’Oreal is your friend, sister – the brunette shade. Gawd, that was some seriously bad hair, two tone AND oily. Ick.

Courtney: Anna looked like either Miss Texas USA 1976 or June Carter Cash’s redheaded Russian cousin.  Country bumpkin hair TO THE MAX.  Lacey…looked like trailer trash.  Sorry, but she did. Those roots look ridiculous against the fried blonde of the rest of her hair.  I sure hope the hair department either mandates a color change or finds a way to hide her roots with a headband or something next week.  Petra was a vision – reminded me of a young Ingrid Bergman.  Just lovely. :-)

Most Boobage Ever to Appear on DWTS Award: Wendy Williams

Heidi: To quote Spamalot, “she has huuuge tracts of laaand.” Anyone who has seen that musical will immediately see the hand motions that go with that line and hear the British accent.

Courtney: The first glimpse I caught of Wendy making her way down those glittery stairs nearly blinded me.  All I could see was BOOBS for days! And this wasn’t in the same class as Kym’s Awesome Boobage (TM); these were scary boobs – looked like they might jump out and bite me if I wasn’t careful.  Kids, this is the reason your parents told you not to sit so close to the TV – renegade boobs could gravely injure you. 

Heidi: Just imagine if you had 3-D TV and you were wearing the glasses. It would be like…well, scary.

Moment of the Night that Shouldn’t be Hurl-worthy but was: Dmitry and Declaring the War of the Chests

Heidi: Automatic FAIL. I think I might have gagged aloud. And yes, I am a straight female. :-) And no, I don’t know why I have that reaction. Maybe it’s the implied arrogance. And yes, I know the producers write a lot of that crap that goes into the opening, but I MUCH prefer the way Derek reads his lines (I’m rough, I’m tough, I’m Derek Hough) and then laughs his little tiny butt off like it’s one of the most ridiculous thing EVER. And it was. Until now.

Courtney: I think my analogy to Heidi on Twitter went something like this: “Dmitry is like a housecat to Tony’s panther & Maks’ lion.” This was just so…feeble.  It may as well have been Milton from Office Space (“I’d really like my stapler back, p-p-please.”) up there challenging Mark & Maks to a chest-off.  And while we’re on that topic – I think Tony’s chest is more formidable than Mark’s.  And it may be more formidable than Maks’, even.  Dude is DIESEL…quite possibly the most cut of the male pros.  He could be freebasing protein shakes or something, who knows. 

The Award for Getting Away with Breaking the Most Unwritten Rules in One Night: Dmitry Chaplin

Heidi: I might actually have to give him props because if you’re going to break rules (or hit on the judges pet peeves), it sure is best to get it out of the way on the first night when they’re feeling very forgiving. A lift AND having your partner sit on her ass in the audience AND fussing about (TM Len) with your jacket all in one dance?? Okey Dokey then, buddy, you got LUCKY.

Courtney: I think Dmitry also lucked out in having Petra – I think it’s impossible for anyone to hate her.  She’s just so SAINTLY.  I have a feeling they could have done multiple, INTENTIONAL lifts, been completely off-time, futzed around in the audience, and messed with a coat, a feather duster, a table, and an orangutan and still gotten a reprieve from the judges.  And I wouldn’t blame them…she’s the Mother Theresa of the modeling world :-)

LOL Moment of the Night – Female: Anna Trubunskaya, “I will break you into a dancer” with requisite RUSSIAN Accent; Honorable Mention to Carrie Ann for “Chippendale’s Cha Cha”

Heidi: I love Anna – that was a truly goofy line delivered in this Cold War Russian accent that implied torture was not far behind. And that was actually a pretty clever line from Carrie Ann and she’s not really known for clever lines.

Courtney: Some episodes of DWTS feel like Coming to America to me – except instead of Eddie Murphy, we have Anna :-) She learns about American sports (remember the Walter Payton vs. Belka & Strelka analogy last season?), she dances to songs she clearly never heard until she came to America (“Hella Good”?), and she says funny, stereotypically-Russian things like this and makes it totally adorable :-) As for Carrie Ann – I’m not gonna credit her with that one.  I’ll credit her va-jay-jay for that one…cause that was clearly what was doing all the talking when she was critiquing & scoring Chris’ cha-cha. *eye roll*

LOL Moment of the Night – Male: Bruno Tonioli, “Call me, Daphne”

Heidi: Just LOL – no clue what he was getting at, don’t remember what he was talking about, but I have a feeling that Tommy B. called him Daphne for hours afterward.

Courtney: I think it was to Ray – a guy I’m not so sure quite understood the humor of it.  Awwwwwkwwwwarrrrd.

TMI/Grossest Moment of the Night: Kendra – “I just went into your butt crack.”

Heidi: :::gag::: Oh, I so did NOT need to hear that. Or visualize it. Or anything it. Really, the blame has to go to the producers – seriously boys, out of all the hours of video you got of these two, you went with THIS???

Courtney: Kendra’s whole package seemed to be a montage of her just saying stupid shit. “My hips don’t lie!” “I’ve got moves for a white girl!” Are they deliberately TRYING to paint her as a crass bimbo? Cause so far, it seems to be working. As for this particular comment…I wouldn’t go near Louis’ butt crack with a ten foot pole.  Errr…bad phrase to use…let’s move on…:-/

Heidi: Damn, I worked so hard with my brain to NOT go there and then you went there. :-)

WTF Moment of Costuming: Brooke’s Dress with Audrey Hepburn’s hat stitched on to the front.

Heidi: You know, Brooke is beautiful. And this dress was beautiful too…but when I get distracted by that large round hat that appeared to be stitched to the front, it’s probably not a dress she should wear on the show. I spent way too much time trying to figure out what the hell that was, beyond simple ornamentation. Is it a fan? Is it a hat? Didn’t Audrey Hepburn wear that in Breakfast at Tiffany’s? WTF?

Courtney: It’s a satellite dish so she can get better reception from the control booth when they’re feeding her lines, duh! I just have to wonder if they had to strategically plan Brooke’s route through the studio to avoid narrow spaces…she could have gotten stuck, y’know. :-)

Most Overdone Running Joke: Master P’s bad scores; (dis)honorable mention for reminding Hines several times that he’d lost the Superbowl

Courtney: Hardy har har har, Master P got the worst score in DWTS history.  It’s funny once – but 3, 4, and 5 times? It’s just getting annoying and makes me wonder if they have nothing else to talk about.  The only truly funny instance to me was when Mike joked about his own scores, saying “Well my dad is Master P, so it’s not so bad.”  And then the near constant “So Hines, you lost the Superbowl…” intro.  By the 3rd time, I think he had just permanently plastered that grin on his face to keep from rolling his eyes.  It’s ok, Hines – everything sounds more annoying coming out of Brooke’s mouth. Just smile and nod and she’ll go away eventually.

Heidi: And to think we’re only in Week 1! Hines might do an endzone dance on her head if she keeps it up. “I’ll show you losing the Superbowl!!!” As for Master P?? Bad idea, since half the viewers likely didn’t know who he is. They do now thanks to YouTube. Poor Romeo.

March 24, 2011 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

Dancing With The Stars 12 – Questions & Answers At ABC “Team Pages”

Hey Fans, just a quick update. Be sure to visit the Team Pages at the Official Dancing With The Stars. They are currently working at filling each of them up with new interviews, pictures, etc. You can view all of the Team Pages >>>>HERE. Thanks to PureDWTS reader @ElmariL for the heads up on this news.

I Written By

I'm a fashion and music fan....and I have always loved dancing too of any kind. Dancing With The Stars seems to have this way of bringing all of those things together. One of my favorite dancing quotes at the moment: "No matter what, nobody can take away the dance you've already had...." ~Gleb Savchenko . For fun music and dance mixes, visit WilUnleashed Soundcloud.