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DWTS Season 18, Week 8 – Let’s Recap Tonight’s Show (Spoilers)

Okay, due to heavy traffic, we have to institute a few ground rules for tonight show. Most of these are good rules ALL OF THE TIME, and are basic netiquette.

  1. DO NOT hitrefresh every few seconds – in fact, do not hit refresh every five minutes! Read, comment if you like, then walk away from the computer for five to ten minutes. I know this is hard, but it will prevent others from losing their minds trying to read and/or update the site.
  2. DO NOT use the comment section like it’s twitter – it’s not twitter. Make an actual comment with context of who you’re talking about, who you’re talking to (if it applies), etc. Context, and more than one line. If you break this rule more than one time, I start deleting. If you do it a couple times, you’ll find yourself on moderation.  Perhaps for life. :-)  Keep in mind that if you can’t follow this rule, I can make you follow it.
  3. Try very hard to keep the ugly to a minimum. Think before you post. If you’ve been called out previously on this blog for your behavior, this will be extra important because there’s only so much I will tolerate. I’m not talking about differing opinions, I’m talking about nasty. If I get the sense that you are purposely trolling  (look it up if you’re not sure), I will just block you. No warning other than this one.

Okay, that’s all I can think of. Let the games begin. Take a drink every time ALM is a mean ole beyotch and you’ll really enjoy the show! :-D

Court here, filling in for Heidi, who is running a tad late :-) Is it just me, or is Mark sounding an awful lot like Robin Thicke these days?

Oh, I see Abby Lee has her happy face on tonight…NOT.
Good to see Charlie is safe. Mama Spence, however, is worried that Sharna’s bewbs are gonna fall out of her dress during their quickstep.

Charlie kills the quickstep, and both Len & Abby go in for the kill. Tonight is gonna be a loooong night, I’m afraid.

Ok, happy that Charlie got that long-overdue 40, but did anyone else think those were the most incongruous scores/critiques EVER??! The way they were critiquing, I was expecting 8’s. Why pick someone apart if you’re gonna give them a 10? Kinda defeats the purpose…

ETA 1:  Heidi here – I’m back!!  Is it my imagination or are these dances really short. Perhaps it’s just that Danica’s dance took so long to get started.  Ha! Len just copied me. :-)

Meryl and Maks – Rumba or contemporary? I saw rumba content, but they were skating awfully close to the edge there.   Of course Bruno loves it.  Lord, I’m tired of hearing about their chemistry – and is that CAI justifying her good comments?? She’s recalling Charlie’s rumba – and she’s right about that.  Len’s coming down with CAI…and ABL needs to be put out of our misery. Seriously. LOL…sickled feet. Beyotch – bite me.  Maks: “Can we go now.”  Come on MAKS – if ever you were going to spout off, NOW is the time!!!

ALERT….ALERT…ALERT….for the next 10 minutes I’m going to be a Maks fan.  I might even declare this “Maks day” on the blog. Seriously – MOST of the time I hate his spouting off, but I think this time was beyond appropriate.

ETA 2: I knew Mark would give Candace a good dance to that song. Very nice.  One or two tiny rough spots, but I loved it.

ETA 3: So a Derek fan just asked me if his critics would comment about Val’s smoke machine. :::crickets:::  LOL – as if.

ETA 4: Wait…so Meryl gets an 8 from ALM, but JAMES gets a 10?? And we thought CAI judged with her vajayjay.  Lord have mercy.  I’m okay with Meryl getting an 8 for that….but in that case, James should have had a 7, not a 10.

OMG, Amy and Derek…perfection. And I rarely use that to describe anyone.  But I have to comment on Derek’s face. He was working up a good head of PISSED OFF on Amy’s behalf. I’ve been watching that boy for a long time, but that was his “You diss my girl, I kick your asssss” face. :-)  I think it’s very good thing for ALM that she didn’t take any unwarranted shots at him.   Anyway, that was a kick ass AT – I expect nothing less from Derek Hough.

ETA 5: Well, can’t believe I’m going to say this, but I think Meryl and Danica got a bit hosed.  Of course, that song is the worst thing I’ve heard on this show in a while, so there’s that too. I tried to block it out and just look at the dancing and I didn’t think it was as bad as 8’s. All 9’s would have been more appropriate.

ETA 6: Wow wow wow….Candace and Charlie!! Excellent dance. I wonder if the producers will blur Sharna’s lips in the skybox for the west coast. :-D   Love it Sharna, keep it coming.

ETA 7: Ouch – that fall was kinda bad…and Derek’s face. And again, I  have to go to Derek’s face during the judging – I don’t know if he realizes it, but he has a face when Abby is talking that says he’s either pissed or disgusted – not sure which. He was pretty vehement a few years ago in his criticism of ALM, either he or Mark called her teaching style “child abuse” and it appears to me that he’s not had a change of heart on that one.

Man…I don’t want any of them to go home at this point.

And the eliminee is….Danica. I’m sad to say I called this one correctly.  :-(  I had no trouble with the site tonight, so I think that means our readers all behaved themselves -thanks ya’ll.

May 5, 2014 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS Season 18, Week 7 – Let’s Recap Tonight’s Show (Spoilers)

I’d like to start by thanking our regular readers, the casual readers and our haters. ;-) Our page views have never been higher. So thanks. For some of you, I doubt this was what you intended. LOL.

Some of you who are fond of copying our stuff and then claiming we don’t know jack are in for a bit of a disappointment. I already know what three of the couples are dancing next week and if you behave yourselves, I might just share. Soon. :-)

Now, on with the show. Tonight’s drinking game is about Danica. How often will they mention, pimp or otherwise exaggerate her injury that sources say isn’t as bad as is being portrayed? Take a shot every time. DOUBLE shot for words to that effect out of Danica’s mouth…Triple shot for Val. Do NOT send me your rehab bill. :-D I’m paying for my own since I’ve been doing a shot every time someone is kissing Meryl’s ass in the comments. It beats back nausea. HA! Read more..

April 28, 2014 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

PureDWTS Season 18, Week 6 – Power Rankings

So as predicted, the show took a few liberties with “party anthems” last night – I can’t speak for you guys, but I’ve never been drunk off my heiny at a frat party and gone “OMG!!! This is my JAAAAAMMMM!” while toasting my Keystone in the air to “You’re the One That I Want” from Grease.  But hey, that’s just me :-P I’m also not quite sure that “Feels So Close” is even popular enough to receive “anthem” status, but maybe at 29 I’m just getting too old to know what’s popular…

Anywho…so Redfoo (aka Berry Gordy’s baby boy) did about as well as a guest judge as we expected him to – he was there more for entertainment value, comic relief, and self-promotion more than any sort of constructive input on the dances, but I was oddly ok with the whole thing because I don’t think it really affected the scores or critiques for better or worse.  I’d much rather hear Redfoo’s incoherent analogies about crustaceans running in the sand and NeNe being an entrepreneur than Donny Osmond’s self-centered prattling (or worse yet – the hellfire which I imagine the insidious Abby Lee Miller will be raining down on Derek & Mark two weeks from now 8-O ).  I can’t imagine he’s up to a whole lot since LMFAO decided to go on hiatus a year and a half ago – I have a feeling that the call he got from TPTB went something like this: “So Redfoo, we want you as a guest judge on DWTS!” “Sounds cool, but what’s in it for me?” “$100 bucks, a sammich, and your own personalized set of neon zebra print paddles!” “I’M SO THERE!!! Let me just go tease my hair real quick…”

Kinda sad to see Drew go, but I think he was ready – seemed like he was getting really tired and burnt out, and hadn’t been able to recapture the magic of his switch week dance with Witney in these past two weeks with Cheryl.  Really & truly, I wish it had been NeNe – and I guess I’m hoping that the novelty of her is beginning to wear off and we might say goodbye to her next week.  She may be fun to watch, but at this point, I feel like she’s not really even picking up legitimate choreography – it’s just a lot of booty shaking and “NeNe-ing” around the floor and getting absurdly high scores, while others doing appropriate choreography (namely Candace & Charlie) just can’t seem to catch any breaks with the judges.  What gives??? Read more..

April 22, 2014 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

PureDWTS Season 18, Week 7 – The Team Dances REVEALED!!!

It’s been a long ass day and I need sleep, so I’m just gonna get right to it…your teams for next week’s team dances are:

Team Meryl: Meryl & Maks, Danica & Val, Amy & Derek, and Candace & Mark

Team Charlie: Charlie & Sharna, James & Peta, NeNe & Tony

Yes, I know – please take a moment to lift your jaw off the floor as I did when I first heard the teams. I assure you, there’s a perfectly rational explanation…and her name is Saint Meryl the Peacemaker. :-) Apparently Meryl won the coin toss and got to pick first – and the funny thing is, the pros did not have any say in who got picked for each team. Deep Throat insinuated that the pros may not have even been in the same room when the picking of the teams was happening…which I actually think is kind of cool. Kept some of the politics out of the team-picking. Anywho! Danica & Val were Meryl’s first pick, as that was who she “thought Maks would really want”. Then Charlie picked James & Peta (bromance!), and Meryl picked Amy & Derek. Charlie picked NeNe & Tony, and Meryl was left with Candace & Mark. Read more..

April 21, 2014 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS Season 18, Week 6 – Let’s Recap Tonight’s Show (Spoilers)

Anyone got an idea for a good drinking game? I have several… :-)

Loved the opening number.

NeNe – that weren’t no Salsa.  And she’s safe. Now I’m scared.

Candace in jeopardy. I’m wondering if she can buy another week or if they’re just giving her fans huge hints to get voting and Drew’s on the block. I sure hope Amy is safe….

James knows he has to step it up. Took a bit too long to get the dance started. Lack of body content.  Huge break in hold. Pretty dangerous. Annnddd….Len doesn’t disappoint. There is some hope.

Ten bucks says the time wasting move of the week is Meryl taking off her coat. If I’m right, everyone DRINKS. :-)

That was okay….but still all the walking. Congrats to Meryl anyway.

Abby lee Miller on this show is a disgrace. That is all.

So Candace and Danica are in jeopardy. Worried for Amy…but I wonder if Danica and Candace – the rivals – will be the last two standing.

And Sharna shows Maks how to put a lot of content in a dance. That was great. I love it. :-)

And Charlie gets hosed once again. Seriously – what is up here. There is no way that Charlie was four points lower than Meryl. Is he killing it in votes or what??

Well, that was actually one of the kickiest and flickiest jives I’ve seen. Who was saying Amy couldn’t jive?? LOL – she did a great job. It’s about physics, people. She’s moving faster so it’s easier.

In the end, Drew has left the ballroom. He was my second choice, but I’m not surprised.

I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

PureDWTS Season 18, Week 6 – What’s Left to Dance?

So we’re at the halfway point in the competition – 5 more weeks to go, and there’s still 8 couples left…seems like a lot, but I guess numerically it makes sense.  We’ve got party anthem night this coming Monday, Latin night the following Monday, and then who knows.  Will the guest judges cease once we hit week 8? Will the themes cease? When’s the team dance? What other funky sh*t are they gonna throw our way between now and the finale? :-P

I don’t have ALL of the answers, but I’ll try and paint the clearest picture I can of the remainder of the season.  Here’s the list of what the remaining couples have left to dance in the coming weeks – I’ve already removed their party anthem week dances, so consider this the remaining dances for Latin week onward. I’ve added a bit of my own commentary as well.  And because I’m nice, I did it both a list format AND a handy-dandy chart. :-) I have a question mark by the Viennese waltz (see why below) and I honestly doubt we’ll see anyone else doing the swing this season, but I went ahead and included it since we did see it from two couples already. Read more..

April 17, 2014 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

PureDWTS Season 18, Week 6 – Party Anthem Week Song Predictions!!!

So next week promises to be either totally awesome or a complete trainwreck :-P Maybe a bit of both.  Should be interesting to see what they pick as “party anthems” considering some of the songs they picked for prom week in season 16 were pretty debatable as songs one might hear at the prom, so I won’t be shocked if we hear something like “Friday” by Rebecca Black this coming week as a “party anthem”.

So far, I have a few hunches: one is that they’re going to probably reuse some songs we’ve heard in the past, to save some time & money.  Second hunch? They won’t be able to resist using at least one LMFAO song, since Redfoo is the guest judge – question is, will somebody get it as their actual performance music, or will it be used for the pro dance? Third hunch: if these songs are considered “party anthems”, they’re probably pretty well-known and have been commercially successful at some point.  Below is a list I’ve compiled of songs used on the show in the past that might be considered “party anthems” – I’ve divided them up by the dance they correspond to, but that’s not to say that TPTB (in their infinite wisdom) will actually use them for the dances they’re intended for :-P I’ve bolded the ones that I have a strong feeling we’ll see again this week – and no, that’s not me hinting at a song spoiler, because I haven’t talked to Deep Throat yet this week.  Just purely a Court gut feeling. Don’t get it twisted, kids. ;-) I’ve also added a few that we haven’t seen on the show, that I just think might fit the bill – those are in blue. Read more..

April 15, 2014 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS Season 18, Week 5 – Let’s Recap Tonight’s Show (Spoilers)

I’m back in the saddle again…oh, wait, that’s not a Disney song. I have a feeling this damn music is going to be stuck in my head for DAYS. :-)  Anyway, Heidi here, with the recap- as-I-feel-like-it method of blogging.

LOVED the opening number. Love. Made me happy.

Eight minutes into the show and we’ve already heard TWICE how Donny won. Once from him, once from either Erin or Tom.

I would have killed Len if he had picked on Drew for breaking hold. Pisses me OFF that their damn animation is probably dictating choreography.

Gee, Danica looked great in that preview for someone who isn’t a dancer. :::cough:::

Holy shit! Sorry john, but that’s all I can think of after Charlie’s dance. I’ll be pissed if he doesn’t get a ten or 3 – it was just a cane!

Danica’s dance was very cute! Yes, Len, she is a fantastic dance. She’s a ringer!

Okay, she was overscored, folks. Our news “story”.

I forgot to mention Cody in Jeopardy…if he’s safe tonight he will be for a while. Let’s talk riled Fanbase.

:::sob::: That was beautiful, Amy.

I really liked NeNe’s dance. Don’t know what to say about that package, but I guess Tony was honest.

I guess some fans don’t much care if they are perceived as soulless….I guess it’s good to have goals.

Wow. Great dance from James – first perfect score and he ain’t even the big ole ringer!

Meryl’s dance was well executed, but pretty uninspired compared to the rest of the dances of the night.

I wonder if NeNe’s going because they gave her such a great score.

So, Mark’s the crab? :-)

Donny: “me me me me”

I was kind of hope they would call Candace safe right there. That would have made it exciting.

And that shocking elimination we were all wondering about? Well it happened tonight. Although it wasn’t really that shocking. I kind of wondered if Candace had a good voting Fanbase. And to all of you wondering about teenybopper fans and guys with huge Twitter following? There’s your answer.;

April 14, 2014 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

PureDWTS Season 18, Week 4 – Power Rankings

Tonight’s episode of Sesame Street was brought to you by the phrases “these are the couples you chose!”, “keep it all in the family”, and “incestual”.  :-) I know I can’t be the only one that thought they were trying to drive the point home just a bit too hard that the couples we saw last night were the ones that we voted for – defensive much? Had they actually given Meryl to Derek (as the voters had), it would have created an entire cascade of partner changes that I think would have created an entirely different outcome last night.  But that’s neither here nor there – I guess I’m just sort of over the entire partner switch at this point. It’s over and done with, and it’s hard to dwell on what a turd the whole thing was when we’ve got Disney Week  next week :-)

I do feel the need to touch on the phrase “keep it all in the family!” though – on the surface, it seems innocuous enough, but I feel like it’s yet another barrier the Chmerkovskiy brothers (and Tony, to a lesser degree) put up between themselves and the other pros on the show.  I know they seem to have a sort of “us against the world” mentality, but more often than not, they themselves are the ones creating that environment.  “Keep it all in the family” says to me “I don’t trust the other pros.  I refuse to associate with the other pros.  I am better than the other pros. Don’t let the other pros near my partner…mine, mine, MINE!” It implies that the only family that matters is theirs – and the relationships with the other pros that they’ve cultivated over the years are worthless.  The Chmerkovskiys are a family, but so is DWTS – when the cards are down, the pros do look out for each other. I guess the reason I’m bringing it up is because I was rather surprised to hear Meryl repeat it in her package – I think it was probably just out of politeness to Val & Maks, but in the spirit of the switch (which so many of the other pros embraced with open arms – including Tony), it just seemed almost like self-segregation.

I’m left feeling rather puzzled by the judges’ comments & scoring last night – there were certain couples that got raked across the coals that I didn’t think were that bad (Candace & Tony, Charlie & Peta), couples that got treated with kid gloves (and this is probably gonna get me in trouble, but Amy & Mark), and couples that just did not really register at all with the judges (Danica & Maks, Cody & Sharna). And apparently there was fallout backstage last night after the show – a source says that Peta was in tears and was being consoled by Charlie & Sharna, and Mark was allegedly overheard saying that he thinks he’s “as good as done” next week thanks to Tony (which I don’t agree with…at least not the reasoning).  Tough day at the office for those two :-(

On the upside, we got a pretty cute opening number (that was perhaps a little heavy on the “switch” theme, but whatever), and the Macy’s Stars of Dance segment returned triumphantly with a pretty cool flamenco-infused number by Derek, Artem, Sasha, Henry, Jon Platero, & the beast that is Kathryn McCormick.  I smell some potential Emmy fodder, if the Stars of Dance segments in the coming weeks measure up to the one we saw last night! Julianne also returned as a judge, to both cheers and jeers – and WTF was up with her eyebrows??? Somebody get Anastasia Soare on the phone, because somebody is using the wrong color pencil on Miss Hough…

Bear with me as I try not to repeat too much of the stuff I said in the live discussion post last night – guess I should have held back a bit for my power rankings :-P I went ahead and put the original pro partner names in parentheses here, as they will be the ones potentially at-risk to be eliminated next week. Read more..

April 8, 2014 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Check out some of my other work at pureamericasgottalent.com!

DWTS Season 18, Week 4 – Let’s Recap Tonight’s Show (Spoilers)

Heidi is otherwise occupied for the time being…so for now, you get me (Court).  Who’s ready to see this partner switch?

Cute opening number…maybe a little repetitive on the whole “switch” theme. That song takes me back to sorority recruitment 2005. Damn, Julianne’s hair is SHORT.

Candace & Tony actually seem like a good match, personality-wise. I think that dance suited them both well, and she actually handled it better than the last two dances we’ve seen from her.

Kinda surprised at Candace’s score. Thought she was a little low-balled. Wonder if this is gonna be one of those nights with lots of over & underscoring…

Wow. James & Cheryl must’ve found some chemistry after all – cause that was hot, both technically & from a showmanship perspective. He really may be a “dark horse” (pun intended ;-) )

Unrelated: isn’t that Oksana’s bf that was standing up by Cheryl’s throne? Jonathan Platero?

Erin, your voice makes me want to punch babies. Please stop with this inane showmance talk.

Drew & Witney were actually really cute – I think having a younger partner brought out the more playful side of Drew.

Hmmmm…beginning to wonder if they’ve decided that Candace is expendable, the way they’re scoring everyone else…

Pretty cool Stars of Dance performance from Derek & Co. Kathryn McCormick is a beast – probably only one of two female contemporary dancers that could have kept up with the ballroom boys…the other being Allison Holker.

Hmmm…Danica & Maks were interacting exactly the way we said they would: Maks saying “just do it” and Danica asking super-detailed questions. It was cute, but it seemed like an awful lot of time-wasting…and WTF was up with the wedge sneakers???

Charlie & Peta were nice to watch – if not a bit incestuous-looking, with their twinnie-looking hair. Thought I saw a lift, though…will Carrie Ann call them out?

Really glad Amy is going back to Derek next week – Mark tried, but I think Derek just knows better how to utilize Amy’s skills. On the upside – her ass looked hot. I’m envious :-)

Kinda left with mixed feelings about Cody & Sharna’s foxtrot – I think she did a good job of choreographing to his strengths, but his frame is still wonky and I feel like he doesn’t get very invested unless he can make the dance very “Cody”. Also, Cody & Sharna aren’t the first Aussies to dance together on DWTS – that would be Ingo & Kym on season 16. :-)

Now that may not have been the most difficult jazz routine, but it was PERFECT for NeNe and I thought going the Afro-jazz route was pretty clever. Was nice to see her let loose completely!

Meryl nailed that. ‘Nuff said. :-)

April 7, 2014 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)