Dancing with the Stars Season 12, Week 1 – The Cheesecake Awards!!
We’re Baaaaack!!! It’s easy, it’s cheesey, it’s Dancing With The Stars!!! For those new to this site, Courtney and I hand out weekly awards for the funniest, cheesiest and occassionally most annoying aspects of this show. Sometimes we’re serious, sometimes we’re silly…and sometimes we’re dirty. Well, I’m dirtier than Courtney. More practice. 🙂 Mostly, we pick on the show and all the people involved in it. WARNING: if you are a hypersensitive fan of someone on the show, check your sensitivity at the door. We even pick on the people WE like. 🙂
On with the show…
The Award for Most Unintended Innuendo: Chelsea Kane
Heidi: This is mostly my brain at work on a glass (or two) of wine. When Chelsea says, “Yes, I got to kiss Joe Jonas. It didn’t suck” I confess my first thought was “Oh, you poor thing, he didn’t….” Oh. Wait. Totally not what she’s talking about.
Courtney: Pretty sure the purity ring would have gotten in the way.
Award for Most Intended Innuendo (That Went Over Most Everyone’s Head): Bruno to Chelsea – “You started on your back, you ended on your back, and everything in between was pure afterglow!”
Courtney: Was I the only one who raised an eyebrow to this? 😉 Somehow I think Bruno might have gotten the order mixed up a bit, though…doesn’t the afterglow come after the main event, and not during? Then again, maybe my boudoir adventures have tended towards the tame…or maybe Bruno likes to do things completely out of order. Best part: I don’t think Mark or Chelsea really picked up on the blantant innuendo of it…or if they did, they played it off quite well. Can’t imagine that Mark didn’t pick up on that one…;-)
Heidi: Oh, all my eyebrows were raised. 🙂 And where the hell was Tommy B. in this?? No way did he let that comment slide! Oh, Wait. He saw the purity ring and figured it was pointless. Or more uncomfortable. As for Mark, well, he’s been thinking about that for a while…
Award for the Earliest Start to a Showmance: Mark Ballas
Heidi: Kissing, rolling around on the floor, teasing…dude has a thing for chaste girls named Chelsea (ie)? 😉 How long until he whips out the guitar and serenades her to calm her down?
Courtney: This may be a record even for Mark – getting smoochy with his partner during their first rehearsal?! What’s the next step…canoodling in the Celebraquarium? Or do we move directly to the weekends in Napa/rosepetals on the bed/satin sheets phase of the relationship?
Heidi: You forgot the candles.
The Award for Most Hip Analogy by a Sixty Year Old: Len Goodman and his BEP reference.
Heidi: So, in Len’s mind the BEP are a crazy mess? Because I’m pretty sure that when he said Chelsea’s Foxtrot went all “Black Eyed Peas” in the middle, it was NOT a compliment. 🙂
Courtney: Blech. I hate the Peas. And Len is right – they’re a crazy mess. Didn’t you see the Superbowl??? They had to bring in Usher midway through the performance to save the day. Almost as hot a mess as Xtina flubbing the national anthem…almost.
Heidi: Oh, they were indeed a mess – interesting analogy for good ole Len, though. 🙂
The Award for Most Schizophrenic Backstage Crew Members (AKA: Award for Backstage Crew Members with an Unhealthy Fixation on the Three Bears): The Hair Department.
Heidi: I found Anna’s hair to be TOO BIG, but Lacey’s hair was too small…while Petra’s hair was juuuust right. Seriously, how can they do such a beautiful job on Petra’s hair (and others) then go so huge on Anna that her head looks like it belongs in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade? And me thinks they just avoid Lacey altogether cause that girl looked like she hadn’t seen shampoo in a month. L’Oreal is your friend, sister – the brunette shade. Gawd, that was some seriously bad hair, two tone AND oily. Ick.
Courtney: Anna looked like either Miss Texas USA 1976 or June Carter Cash’s redheaded Russian cousin. Country bumpkin hair TO THE MAX. Lacey…looked like trailer trash. Sorry, but she did. Those roots look ridiculous against the fried blonde of the rest of her hair. I sure hope the hair department either mandates a color change or finds a way to hide her roots with a headband or something next week. Petra was a vision – reminded me of a young Ingrid Bergman. Just lovely. 🙂
Most Boobage Ever to Appear on DWTS Award: Wendy Williams
Heidi: To quote Spamalot, “she has huuuge tracts of laaand.” Anyone who has seen that musical will immediately see the hand motions that go with that line and hear the British accent.
Courtney: The first glimpse I caught of Wendy making her way down those glittery stairs nearly blinded me. All I could see was BOOBS for days! And this wasn’t in the same class as Kym’s Awesome Boobage (TM); these were scary boobs – looked like they might jump out and bite me if I wasn’t careful. Kids, this is the reason your parents told you not to sit so close to the TV – renegade boobs could gravely injure you.
Heidi: Just imagine if you had 3-D TV and you were wearing the glasses. It would be like…well, scary.
Moment of the Night that Shouldn’t be Hurl-worthy but was: Dmitry and Declaring the War of the Chests
Heidi: Automatic FAIL. I think I might have gagged aloud. And yes, I am a straight female. 🙂 And no, I don’t know why I have that reaction. Maybe it’s the implied arrogance. And yes, I know the producers write a lot of that crap that goes into the opening, but I MUCH prefer the way Derek reads his lines (I’m rough, I’m tough, I’m Derek Hough) and then laughs his little tiny butt off like it’s one of the most ridiculous thing EVER. And it was. Until now.
Courtney: I think my analogy to Heidi on Twitter went something like this: “Dmitry is like a housecat to Tony’s panther & Maks’ lion.” This was just so…feeble. It may as well have been Milton from Office Space (“I’d really like my stapler back, p-p-please.”) up there challenging Mark & Maks to a chest-off. And while we’re on that topic – I think Tony’s chest is more formidable than Mark’s. And it may be more formidable than Maks’, even. Dude is DIESEL…quite possibly the most cut of the male pros. He could be freebasing protein shakes or something, who knows.
The Award for Getting Away with Breaking the Most Unwritten Rules in One Night: Dmitry Chaplin
Heidi: I might actually have to give him props because if you’re going to break rules (or hit on the judges pet peeves), it sure is best to get it out of the way on the first night when they’re feeling very forgiving. A lift AND having your partner sit on her ass in the audience AND fussing about (TM Len) with your jacket all in one dance?? Okey Dokey then, buddy, you got LUCKY.
Courtney: I think Dmitry also lucked out in having Petra – I think it’s impossible for anyone to hate her. She’s just so SAINTLY. I have a feeling they could have done multiple, INTENTIONAL lifts, been completely off-time, futzed around in the audience, and messed with a coat, a feather duster, a table, and an orangutan and still gotten a reprieve from the judges. And I wouldn’t blame them…she’s the Mother Theresa of the modeling world 🙂
LOL Moment of the Night – Female: Anna Trubunskaya, “I will break you into a dancer” with requisite RUSSIAN Accent; Honorable Mention to Carrie Ann for “Chippendale’s Cha Cha”
Heidi: I love Anna – that was a truly goofy line delivered in this Cold War Russian accent that implied torture was not far behind. And that was actually a pretty clever line from Carrie Ann and she’s not really known for clever lines.
Courtney: Some episodes of DWTS feel like Coming to America to me – except instead of Eddie Murphy, we have Anna 🙂 She learns about American sports (remember the Walter Payton vs. Belka & Strelka analogy last season?), she dances to songs she clearly never heard until she came to America (“Hella Good”?), and she says funny, stereotypically-Russian things like this and makes it totally adorable 🙂 As for Carrie Ann – I’m not gonna credit her with that one. I’ll credit her va-jay-jay for that one…cause that was clearly what was doing all the talking when she was critiquing & scoring Chris’ cha-cha. *eye roll*
LOL Moment of the Night – Male: Bruno Tonioli, “Call me, Daphne”
Heidi: Just LOL – no clue what he was getting at, don’t remember what he was talking about, but I have a feeling that Tommy B. called him Daphne for hours afterward.
Courtney: I think it was to Ray – a guy I’m not so sure quite understood the humor of it. Awwwwwkwwwwarrrrd.
TMI/Grossest Moment of the Night: Kendra – “I just went into your butt crack.”
Heidi: :::gag::: Oh, I so did NOT need to hear that. Or visualize it. Or anything it. Really, the blame has to go to the producers – seriously boys, out of all the hours of video you got of these two, you went with THIS???
Courtney: Kendra’s whole package seemed to be a montage of her just saying stupid shit. “My hips don’t lie!” “I’ve got moves for a white girl!” Are they deliberately TRYING to paint her as a crass bimbo? Cause so far, it seems to be working. As for this particular comment…I wouldn’t go near Louis’ butt crack with a ten foot pole. Errr…bad phrase to use…let’s move on…:-/
Heidi: Damn, I worked so hard with my brain to NOT go there and then you went there. 🙂
WTF Moment of Costuming: Brooke’s Dress with Audrey Hepburn’s hat stitched on to the front.
Heidi: You know, Brooke is beautiful. And this dress was beautiful too…but when I get distracted by that large round hat that appeared to be stitched to the front, it’s probably not a dress she should wear on the show. I spent way too much time trying to figure out what the hell that was, beyond simple ornamentation. Is it a fan? Is it a hat? Didn’t Audrey Hepburn wear that in Breakfast at Tiffany’s? WTF?
Courtney: It’s a satellite dish so she can get better reception from the control booth when they’re feeding her lines, duh! I just have to wonder if they had to strategically plan Brooke’s route through the studio to avoid narrow spaces…she could have gotten stuck, y’know. 🙂
Most Overdone Running Joke: Master P’s bad scores; (dis)honorable mention for reminding Hines several times that he’d lost the Superbowl
Courtney: Hardy har har har, Master P got the worst score in DWTS history. It’s funny once – but 3, 4, and 5 times? It’s just getting annoying and makes me wonder if they have nothing else to talk about. The only truly funny instance to me was when Mike joked about his own scores, saying “Well my dad is Master P, so it’s not so bad.” And then the near constant “So Hines, you lost the Superbowl…” intro. By the 3rd time, I think he had just permanently plastered that grin on his face to keep from rolling his eyes. It’s ok, Hines – everything sounds more annoying coming out of Brooke’s mouth. Just smile and nod and she’ll go away eventually.
Heidi: And to think we’re only in Week 1! Hines might do an endzone dance on her head if she keeps it up. “I’ll show you losing the Superbowl!!!” As for Master P?? Bad idea, since half the viewers likely didn’t know who he is. They do now thanks to YouTube. Poor Romeo.
Yay! Good stuff. One thing that I had a question about – Chelsea Kane also does the “purity ring” thing? I had no idea! I just thought she was a Disney actress but not necessarily one of the over-religious and under-pleasured bunch. Interesting if it’s true!
Laughed OUT LOUD. Thanks.
@Fig – I’m not sure if she does or not, but I was referring to the purity ring that the Jo-Bros all wear…and I was insinuating that he wears it on a part of his body other than his finger…hence, it “gets in the way”, both literally & figuratively 😉
Oh boy…I can’t wait to see the party poopers coming out to harass us on this edition 😀 …fan war commencing in 5…4…3…2…1…
Fig, you stole my question. So Chelsea is one of the purity crowd? That makes me liked her even less, and I was just beggining to warm up to her a little. Interesting spin for Mark though. I wonder if we’ll hear about it on the show.
Courtney – that’s what I thought you were referring to as well, but it was actually this statement in conjunction with the purity ring joke that had me wondering:
Heidi: Kissing, rolling around on the floor, teasing…dude has a thing for chaste girls named Chelsea (ie)
So the chaste thing – never heard about that being the case, is all.
Bruno was talking to Sugar Ray. Asked if he could call him Sugar.
Sugar and Daphne were Tony Curtis and Jack Lemmon’s character names in “Some Like it Hot”, a classic Marilyn Monroe film… and if you insist, a favorite of some gay men.
It would be a huge mistake to take anything I say in the Cheesecake awards as actual knowledge, and not me just being snarky. For example, I am pretty sure that Lacey has washed her hair in the last month.
Just sayin’.
Is Anna ever “totally adorable”? Hmm, I’m not on board with that one. I’m more with Steve Guttenberg, and Anna’s mother — be afraid, very afraid! (Although Anna does seem to have sanded down her more abrasive side as the seasons have gone by.)
So glad the purity ring is on that tool Joe Jo and not Chelsea. (Yes, tool — anyone catch his guest appearance on Top Chef?) That would make me like her less. Right now I find her utterly charming, plus her blog is great. (I can’t remember where it’s pub’d.) Lovely plus she writes so well — I’m smitten.
Well…you can surely see why that wouldn’t necessarily seem to be part of the “joke”, whereas the hair thing obviously was. Not a big deal whatsoever, I just don’t think the “kidding” part of the chaste thing comes across as such, since Chelsie is a Disney star and associated with the Jonas Brothers – and why I was confused as to why I hadn’t heard anything about her being virginal. I wasn’t familiar with her prior to DWTS so I was just wondering if they were trying to downplay that or whatever – but apparently that is not the case. So she’s probably banged lots of dudes. Phew. 🙂 lol
@Pincess Heidi: “For example, I am pretty sure that Lacey has washed her hair in the last month.” I don’t know, I have my doubts. As a male this is certainly not my area of expertise, but… how can Lacey even go out in public looking like that, much less allow herself to be viewed by >20 million people? Shocking. I mean, with her tats, and (ahem) interesting sense of style she’s obviously embracing the label of the alt-DWTS pro. But is there possibly anyone in the show’s fanbase who’s ready for her evolution into SKANK dance pro? I don’t think so.
I always enjoy the Cheesecake Awards and this is no exception. Thank you for sharing your creativity and, especially, the snark.
Yeah, I’ve actually seen a few women pull off ridiculous roots. It’s rare, but it has happened. Lacey is absolutely not one of those women – especially as nasty greasy as it looks. That comb down flat against the head is just awful. A friggen crime.
sasa, figmentation that is stupid, you dislike her because she wears a purity ring? Why be so judgmental?
Huh? LOL I was joking about that. And she doesn’t wear one, that was what I was wondering about. I could not care less if she did or not, I was just surprised that they would downplay her being a purity ring wearer – but she’s not, so they haven’t downplayed it, so it’s all moot.
Fig, don’t worry about explaining, and ignore Karla – she seems to enjoy picking fights around here by attacking people’s opinions. She’s been warned about it before, and should she decide not to be more tactful in the future, we have a problem on our hands.
If anyone wants to dislike a contestant for something, that’s their perogative and it’s no one else’s place to tell them they’re wrong or stupid – we leave that nonsense to the trolls on the ABC boards. You listening, Karla?
Oh, no worries! I’ve got thick skin and while I can’t stand the trolls at the ABC boards (mostly because they aren’t even amusing or funny), I can deal with someone being a little antagonistic – but I can see why you guys would want to maintain a higher level of integrity and not want blatant meanie-bo-beanies (yes I went there) on your site 🙂
“she’s obviously embracing the label of the alt-DWTS pro” Great line.
For the record, is this the first time the word skank has been used on this site? Laughing OUT LOUD again. And here I thought there’d be a dearth of controversial topics. “Call me Daphne”? How’d I miss that one? OT – does Bruno wear satin-like suits often?
Thanks for this – always love the cheesecake awards. And you are so right about Lacey – roots can work (see Sarah Jessica Parker in Sex in the City), but washing it – that’s sorta the key.
Agree on the Bruno comment to Chelsea – wow, I think Tom just stayed away, much safer, especially when she is a Disney star and Disney pays your bills.
And no comment on Kirstie giving the ‘left one’ to 20MM plus people? I laughed out loud, I think she’s gonna be future GOLD for your cheesecake awards….
ROTFLLLLLL I knew you guys would PROVIDE and I loved the HAIR DO BITS THE MOST!! LOL to Miss Texas and Lacey’s hair looking so oily!!
Excellent Girls! I sooo love Cheesecake!!!
Ah, I also thought you said Chelsea wears the ring (and didn’t see Courtney’s explanation in time). I tend to dislike people who wear them for reasons I don’t feel like explaining on a DWTS site.
LOL! Too funny. I had forgotten some of these things, so I got to “re-laugh” all over again. Great job you two.
Love it. First time I have see the Cheesecake awards. I kept looking at Brooke’s dress trying to figure WTF that was on it.
I totally agree on Dmitry’s chest-o-tron moves. Should be hot but somehow it’s really not.
@Jay – I think it may be the first use of “skank”, but Heidi actually used the term “skanktastic” when describing Edyta’s skimpy pink foxtrot dress back in Who Wore it Better? Part VII 🙂
Courtney calm down, free speech on here is selective I see.
Free speech isn’t protected on a blog, Karla. And neither is insulting fellow posters – we’ve been through this before. Discuss – don’t attack. You could have easily said “I don’t understand why you don’t like Chelsea”, but instead, you said Fig & sasa’s opinion was “stupid” and then proceeded to call them judgemental. And Karla, I am perfectly calm – but over my dead body will this site become a place for people to attack and insult one another for having differing opinions. That’s what the ABC boards are for – and if you want to talk to people like that, by all means…do it there.
Hey, I take great pride in the word skanktastic. 🙂
Free speech. :::rolls eyes::: That all you got, Karla?
Yo, people, I think the absence of a purity ring is also still to be determined. I didn’t say I made it up, I said that I don’t always KNOW FOR SURE. 🙂 I have no clue whether she has one or not, nor do I care. I was messing around with purity rings and girls named Chelsea(ie) – the ie one being a mormon and all that.
Fun comments from the peanut gallery! Thanks for the another edition of the “Cheesecake Awards!” All cheeseyness aside I thought it was a great first week! Even the bad dances were entertaining, judging seemed fair for all contestants, the voting systems all worked well, and it was nice to enjoy Tom’s talents again. Lets hope the whole season is as good or better than the first night!
Sue, I don’t remember that comment you’re talking about, otherwise I probably would have mentioned it. Hmmm….I tend to take notes too and somehow I missed it.
Can I just say that the use of commas also appears to be selective??
😀
When you hate on somebody because they hate on people who wear purity rings I think that is stupid.
I was commenting on two people who were being judgmental and rude. Figmentation said people who wore purity rings we ‘over religious and under pleasured.’ That does not get called out by you, but me calling them out, and there is a problem.
sasa said ‘Chelsea one of the purity crowd? That makes me like her even less.’
Heidi you do not have free speech on this blog, that is why Courtney called what I said, that I think what they said was judgemental and stupid.
I am not contributing to your view count by coming to this blog anymore. Bye Bye.
Bye Bye.
Gee, where have I heard that line before? 🙂 See you in a week or so, Karla.
Funny how people who think others are being judgemental and rude are ALSO exceedingly…wait for it…judgemental and rude. This is the best example of the pot calling the kettle black that I think I’ve EVER seen!! A+ for the day on that one, sweetie.
You are also correct – we don’t have free speech on this blog. You keep calling people names we just ban your ass so we don’t have to deal with you anymore. 🙂 Absolutely correct.
You girls picked up on a lot of what I caught. I busted out laughing on Bruno’s “afterglow” comment and yeah, NO ONE caught it (or pretended it didn’t happen. Anna, love her to death, but she reminded me of Pennywise the Clown from It. SCARY! THAT #$#^% still scares me everytime I see it in a store on a dvd flippin’ cover! And then Anna came out like that I was like “NOOOOO! Pennywise is dancing! Oh it’s Anna?” LOL. AND THANK YOU FOR CATCHING DMITRY!! I’m still upset for that horrid freestyle he gave Mya (although had she gotten a perfect score, I think Donny still would have won) and Dmitry is still doing it with Petra who I think has a ton of potential. I’m glad I’m not alone. GREAT CHEESECAKE COURTNEY AND HEIDI!! THANKS!
Karla, I’m sure you’ll be around – I was just joking about that comment. If you actually want to know, my daughter wears a purity ring and has taken a purity vow. I did not encourage this, as I don’t believe in them, but she is pretty religious, but I did tell her that I was proud that she cared enough about herself to want to wait til marriage, but that I was afraid that she would get married too early just so she could have sex, and that I hoped that she continued to talk to me about these things (she is very open and communicative with me) and that I loved her for being so conscientious. Actually, it is less about “Jesus” and more about “not ending up young and pregnant like mom did the fourth time she had sex, even with a condom”. But regardless, I am proud of her – but I know that it’s a hard vow to keep and I wanted to encourage her to keep thinking of sex as something special, but that if she finds herself at 19 and really wanting to consummate things that she doesn’t just get hitched to keep her vow. Wow, totally giving out too much info.
And omg LOL @ Pennywise – I knew she reminded me of someone! Poor Anna – she has great hair but that hair and dress combo was definitely one of the worst looks she’s ever sported. And I agree with the Cheese that Petra just looked gorgeous.
Bravo, Courtney and Heidi!!! Reading that had me ROTFL! 😀
Courtney, I especially liked the “crass bimbo” moniker … but based on “The Girls Next Door” episodes hubby forced me to watch, that’s pretty much Kendra.
Great job again, ladies! Looking forward to the next cheesecake awards! 😀
One thing that surprised me, when my daughter and I were watching it yesterday on the DVR she knew a few of the people I expected – Kirstie Alley (Summer School is one of my favorite movies lol), Ralph Macchio, and Chelsea Kane a bit (but she’s not a Jonas fan at all). But then when Kendra comes on she’s like – oh look, Kendra. My head whipped around like, wtf, how do you know who she is? I guess her friend’s dad loved The Girls Next Door and it was on all the time at their house. The things you learn, jeeeez! She also thought they played up on her sleazy past and didn’t focus on her goofy, athletic nature. I’m not familiar enough with her to know, but I have always heard she’s funny. I think a LITTLE of that came through in the package, but it was definitely all about stripper/skanky/playboy stuff – and Louis is treating her like a piece of meat! Stop it, it turns people off!
Louis has been really good the last couple seasons about turning people off. Maybe taking Kelly to the Finals messed with his head. 🙂
Haha…if it’s any consolation, Fig, I actually found Girls Next Door to be pretty tame. It was mainly just Holly, Bridget, & Kendra running around playing dress-up, going to parties, going on vacation, and playing with animals. Those girls had a pretty charmed life, that’s for sure! And I think that may have resulted in Kendra turning out a bit immature – she was only 19 when she moved into the mansion, never really had to “work” (aside from the occasional photo shoot) and basically did whatever she wanted. I do think she’s improved quite a bit from the time she was on the show (if you think some of the stuff she said on Monday night was bad, it was much worse when she was actually on Girls Next Door) – being a wife and a mommy seems to have matured her somewhat, but there’s still shades of the “outrageous tomboy” Kendra from her time at the mansion.
As for Louis…*shakes head*. He’s always been known in the ballroom world as being a bit arrogant, but it seems to have increased considerably since he went to the finals with Kelly. Maybe he was just less vocal about it before, but now he seems like a bit of a loose cannon. I just hope these two can take it down a few notches, because I think they’re running the risk of turning people off completely if they continue behaving the way they have thus far.
Puredwts writing this season is great. New DWTS controversy brewing??? Who’s cuter??? Chelsie or Chelsea???
*crying* @ Pennywise the Clown comment
Ooooh the battle of the Chels girls, I’m in! I wonder which one Mark would choose. Probably IE judging by the rumors but I bet EA can be very charming too. And while IE is all about being cute EA can be snarky/fun which is always a plus.
Fig practically forced me to address the purity issue with her eloquent answer so here goes in short.
I’m very interested in the religious aspect of things even if I am an atheist. I’m fascinated by fundamentalists (Duggars and crowd) and by how religion translates into practical life and influences everybody. For more see FreeJinger forums.
And my personal opinion is that I very much dislike the religious aspect of purity rings. That does not mean I wouldn’t hang around people who wear them or that I think they should change. It’s like having a friend who is religious and in end effect his pastor preaches that I will go to hell for being an atheist. Does he (my friend) believe that I will go to hell or not? Does that change anything about our friendship?
So, I didn’t really say much in all those words. I don’t like purity rings because they say: look at me, I’m not having sex. I only had sex with my partner of 11 years but I never wore a ring for it. And the part about Dad keeping the key! Oh GAG. Then those Disney kids who wear them, they act like it’s a fashion accessory. When it’s first spotted then it’s a big deal but when it quietly comes of no one ask them THE QUESTION which logically presents itself. I find purity rings to be like modesty clothing. You claim that you honor God by it and that it’s all so pure and perfect but fact is you actually draw attention to yourself.
Thanks Courtney and Heidi! LOL funny! You’ve outdone yourselves this time! I’m sitting in an airport on the way to Beijing and I’m laughing out loud. You guys don’t miss a thing! I can tell the cheese is going to be superb this season! (well you’ve got a lot to work worth!!!)
EPIC CHEESECAKE AWARDS!!!!!!!! Everything was hillarious because it was so friggin true! ROTFL. 🙂
Just got home to this hilarious post – thanks girls. I was waiting for the best beard award. You got it with Wendy walkin out with all that boobage but she had the hair, nails, makeup and all. She always all this confidence, MYYYY Tony, the mirror ball ring and dances like that? Like a minute man, which freakin cracked me up Courtney, all show….no go.
OOPS meant she always comes out with….
“Skanktastic” ROTFL You guys just crack me UP!!!
Oh God, is Chelsea Kane dating Stephen Colletti, of Laguna Beach: The Real OC? They’ve been seen around town together, apparently. If true, then: 1. We can safely assume that she has no interest in purity rings; and 2. I take back what I said about her being charming. Dare I now say… skank? No, I won’t go that far. But if Colletti is the kind of guy she likes to make time with, well, there’s no purity ring poweful enough to fend off the skanky cooties she’s likely to catch from him.
Skank, Skanktastic? People really use these words? lol
Sure, I love the word ‘skank’ (maybe too much.)
The Brits say ‘slag’ instead. (Clive Owen said it to great effect to Julia Roberts in “Closer”, if I recall correctly.) That’s good, too, but I prefer ‘skank’.
It was in a different thread that someone mentioned the cocaine use rumor for Chelsea, right? Well, her dating Colletti makes me about 86% more inclined to believe that rumor.
And as long as I’m being so mature and all, I’ll go ahead and say that if Chelsea is in fact dating him then I’m not voting for her. I just refuse. And if he starts showing up on camera in the audience in support of her, I think I might start actively rooting for her to be eliminated early. So there!
(Hmm, do you think I might be taking the Stephen Colletti hatred too far???)
I didn’t know who Stephen Colletti was until I saw the tweets about him. I’ve never watched Laguna Beach (or One Tree Hill) or any of those reality shows – I do know who some of the people are like Lauren Conrad, Speidi, Kristin Cavalleri, and of course Audrina Patridge are because of other things they’ve done. He’s dated some well known people I guess – Hayden Panettiere, all those Laguna Beach ladies. I don’t know anything about him being an ass, but I think all those people from those shows come across as superficial jackasses.
Here is a picture of them together at the Petra/Dmitry hosted DWTS after-party – so either they are hanging out a lot or are dating.
http://www.zimbio.com/pictures/CWNv4b4tKFW/Stars+at+The+Abbey/vQaNRHD5j9N/Chelsea+Kane
As far as the coke video, it could be her. The hands/arms are very slim like hers are, but the hair seems darker and thicker than hers does (but I’ve not seen all of her hairstyles, just basing this on pics I’ve seen of her). Even if it is her, I don’t think doing coke makes you a bad person, nor would it keep me from liking someone. I would hate if she was a hypocritical bitch about it like that prosecutor from Nevada or whatever that got caught doing loads of coke – or someone that is really anti-drug or whatever publicly and secretly a huge coke fiend. That to me is way worse than some young starlets partying it up. Sure it’s a bit wanky cause she’s Disney, but really is that a shock considering all the kids and the behavior that have come out of that world? I do think some people wouldn’t vote for her if it came to light that it was true, but I *personally* don’t care. I don’t vote, and I’m rooting most for Ralph and Kirstie anyway so it doesn’t really matter 🙂
Did anyone else notice Kelly Preston in the audience the other night for Kirstie alley. Wonder if John Travolta might turn up next?
I want to know who Stephen Colletti is and why we hate him!
This thread is getting more fun all the time and it had already started with a bang. Cheese bang.
Well, I think it’s safe to say that Chelsea & Stephen are more than friends…she just tweeted that she came home and he had bought her a new microwave. Guess they’ve moved on to the small appliance-giving phase of the relationship 🙂
@sasa – Stephen Colletti was one of the cast members on Laguna Beach, the reality show that gave us Lauren Conrad and later The Hills. Now he’s an actor on the tv show One Tree Hill. I don’t personally hate him (other than the fact that he looks like one of my exes), but a lot of people just think he’s kind of a jerk.
Oh, and Margaret – I wouldn’t get your hopes up about John doing the show. He’s allegedly already turned them down several times (not surprising), and his wife Kelly is actually there supporting Kirstie. She actually was tweeting from Kirstie’s Twitter account on Monday night encouraging people to vote for her friend.
Thanks Courtney. I was hoping it was more juicy but I’ll take it.
I don’t think Kirstie should highlight her Scientology connections if she wants to appeal to the general public. I wonder if she’s aware of that and if she cares.
Sasa, Kelly is one of Kirstie’s best friends and it’s only natural that she be there, like Jamie Lee Curtis was there for Jennifer last season. I don’t know where you see that the religious connection has been ‘highlighted’, especially by Kirstie. If anything, the Scientology angle has been virtually ignored by all involved and in the interviews I’ve seen, it’s always been the interviewer who has brought up John, who also is a long-time best friend and co-star. I sincerely hope that this continues and the Scientology stays way, way in the background. Just sayin’. 🙂
No Courtney, I meant that John Travolta may turn up to support Kirstie, I know she wants him to, she said it in an interview.
Kirstie said she may beg him to. I think he will, he’s very down to earth.
By the way it was great to see Jennifer there the other night. Hope she turns up more often! Do you know if and when celebrities go to the show, if they are given special passes or something. How does that work?
The Kendra rehearsal footage was a little much I think. Some things r better off not shown on the show. I feel like they r defeinately doing her a diservice. I was reading EW, and on the back page that looksl iek a dartboard under a pic of Kendra it litteraly sais “aren’t we done wit hher already” or something like that. People dislike her already thte package wasn’t going to help. She coukld go home early if they contine w that kinda footage. Louis is kina a drama queen too so this is not gonna help either lol. I am a fan of Kendra but they r showing me a side of her that I really ddin’t want to know about.
As for Stephen Colleti, I actually know who he is and he may be al ittle bit of a jerk at times but he and Chelsea look cute together. Glad to see him actually stepping bak into the spotlight a bit too. The other guys from the Hills are just plain jerks w the exception of Brody who is a jerk but one that is actually quite likeable in a way.
Thanks, Ladies. Your humor is right on target for me and I love the way you spread it around. If I wasn’t at work wasting time waiting for the weekend to start, I would have been laughing out loud. Instead I was doing a lot of snickering.
@Evaine
Sorry, I wasn’t clear in what I said. I didn’t mean Kirstie highlighted Scientology, she absolutely didn’t. I was just talking theoretically about what could make people dislike her if she makes that connection more prominent. I understand she is best friends with Kelly&John but I’m not sure it would benefit her to keep reminding everyone about it. Maybe I’m wrong, I dunno. She did name drop Travolta on Jay Leno.
I think the connection between Kirstie and John & Kelly is sincere friendship and has nothing to do with their Scientology connection. Maybe some people automatically associate John Travolta with Scientology, but I don’t think that’s the first thing that comes to most people’s minds. For one thing, they don’t make a big deal out of it themselves, and they live a true and faithful life devoted to each other and their family, I think most people have positive vibes from them, regardless of the Scientology.
Oh I’m not doubting their friendship, just wondering how people will perceive it. If it will remind them of Scientology or not. But I think you’re right that despite all the weirdness going on in some aspects the Travoltas still have public respect.
John may not be as out there as Tom Cruise has been (no couch jumping) but he’s gotten his fair share of bad publicity because of Scientology. The death of his son from the seizure had many people faulting the beliefs of Scientology and how it prevented Jett from taking the proper medicine. That and the years of rumors from all over the place about his bathhouse liasons (not to mention a lot of crappy movies since like what – Get Shorty?). There’s quite a few people that have long talked about Travolta’s marriage being a sham, much like Tom Cruise. If you haven’t seen South Park’s humorous take on Scientology, watch the episode at southparkstudios.com called Trapped in the Closet. It’s hysterical and it caused Isaac Hayes (aka Chef and also a Scientologist) to leave the show. So while Travolta doesn’t need to necessarily reclaim his image as much as Cruise does, he’s certainly not without his own controversy. All that being said, I don’t care whether a celeb is a Scientologist or a follower of Kabbalah or any of it. There’s plenty of celebs from all sorts of wacky religions that I like (and those that are wacky and non-religious too!).
Nice cheesecake awards pure comical.
OH GAWD…what did I do before I found the “cheesecake” awards? This is getting better than actually watching DWTS.
Why no one has commented on the satellite dish flower that Brooke wore is beyond me? I went hysterical reading all of that but you both missed an opp with that one in that every time she turned to interview one of the cast (OY VEY when it was a guy) she nearly knocked off a few wee wee’s in the process! I held my breath a couple times waiting for Audrey Hepburn’s hat to take out someone’s family jewels. I am drooling with laughter reading this edition of cheese. You two should be working for some major comedy show.
OW MY GOODNESS! You know Heidi you may have a point with Mark and girls named Chelsea(ie). Or we all have waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay toooo much free time and like to see things that aren’t there. As to the purity rings, I thought it was funny(AND I wear a purity). Can’t wait for week 2’s cheesecake.
Il dio benedice