DWTS Season 14, Weeks 1 and 2 – The Cheesecake Awards!!

Another season, another wheel of cheese. Occassionally, what you read will be an inside joke from a previous season; if you want to catch up on previous awards, just click that big box over there —>

Also, newbie note: In these awards, Courtney and I are sometimes funny, sometimes sarcastic, sometimes bitchy, sometimes annoyed by the whole show….ALWAYS guaranteed to piss someone off. You’ve been warned. 🙂

I also apologize that these weren’t done sooner – that was actually my fault.  My regular 9-5 zapped pretty much all of my creative energy this week, so I didn’t even get to touch these until late yesterday.  So sorry for those of you tweaking from cheese withdrawal 😛 -Court-

Award for Most Innovative (NOT!) Choreographic Choice: Whoever instructed Oksana to do nothing more than whip her hair around like the weapon it is.

Heidi: Seriously – is that the only thing she knows how to do?? It pretty much dominated her little section of the Troupe tribute bit…which in and of itself was a waste of space. Is this like the mating dance of the Mail Order Bride??

Courtney: Newsflash, Mail Order Bride: you are not Willow Smith, and thus whipping your hair back & forth is not really going to garner you any high praise or ignite a dance craze.  But yeah, that hair looks downright deadly at times – and it’s starting to look a little stringy and coarse, too, I’m afraid.  And that steely silver color she’s got going on????! YIKES.  Is she trying to attract a more mature (and affluent) potential husband over at the mail order bride site? I never did understand the whole “fashion gray” hair craze that started last year…trying to look elderly when you’re in your 20s just confuses me. And kids, remember: hairography KILLS.

Heidi: Or at the very least, put out an eye. 🙂 Read more..