DWTS 15, Week 2 – The Cheesecake Awards!!!!
Heidi: I’m on a roll…or a tear, depending on your POV, this week. I’m feeling mean. You’ve been warned. Don’t come crying to me later for my sense of humor having a mean streak this week.
Courtney: But everyone out to be thankful that Heidi’s on a streak, because I myself am feeling a bit…sedate. Apparently I am allergic to either Cajun seasoning or lump crabmeat, as I broke out into hives about 15 minutes after sampling a hot seafood dip Mama Spence made for the Colts game. A few hours, a trip to the urgent care, and a shot of dexamethasone later, I’m feeling less itchy…but a little blaaaahhhh. But hey, at least the Colts beat the Packers! 😀
The C U Next Tuesday Award, Redux: Carrie Ann Inaba, for rather heavy-handedly chastising Bristol Palin for breaking hold in her quickstep
Courtney: Let’s get one thing straight: I fully acknowledge that Bristol & Mark broke hold in their dance (if you haven’t yet, see my post about it) and I agree that the judges were right in pointing it out. HOWEVER – I don’t endorse CAI for going all Regina George on Bristol for it, claiming she was going to “slam back” because Bristol “slammed them in the face” by breaking the staying in hold rule. First of all, I have to laugh at how egocentric CA must be to think that all the couples break rules with the intention of somehow dissing the judges – I’ve heard her make the same ridiculous assumption about couples doing lifts, as if every single choreographic decision the couples make that doesn’t fit into her her specific (and ever-changing) rule book is a personal insult to her. My god, woman, IT’S NOT ALL ABOUT YOU!!! Second of all, at least direct your unwarranted indignance at the real guilty party – Mark. Have you somehow forgotten that the pros ultimately make the choreographic decisions??? I don’t care how much influence you may think a celeb has over their pro partner – the pro gets the final say in the choreography, and if it really was Bristol insisting they break hold (and I’m not sure it was), then Mark should have had the cojones to put his foot down and tell her no. But that’s neither here nor there – CA is a grown woman, not a teenage girl slamming another girl against a locker for stealing her boyfriend/copying her outfit/whatever. Grow up, ya diva…before they have to pull an extra chair up to the judges’ table for your ever-growing ego.
Heidi: She’s just a nutbar. As you said she’s done this before – taken it as a personal insult to her that someone broke the rules. Like Derek or Mark or Maks sit in a room with their partner saying, “What can we do to REALLY get CAI’s goat and piss her off?” But see, that’s the difference between CAI and the pros on this show. The pros are actual choreographers…it’s an art form, and sometimes they make creative decisions to put together the most exciting, memorable dance and that means a rule gets broken. I doubt CAI was considered until they looked at the final routine and figured that they better warn their partner they might get in trouble because CAI is a self centered biotch who thinks it’s all about HER.
The “Making out is the new black!” Award: Helio & Chelsie and Apolo & Karina, for finding ways to smooch in their routine; honorable mention – Val Chmerkovskiy, for finding any excuse he could to kiss Kelly on the head/hand/arm/etc.
Courtney: This seemed to be one week where the makeup department was discouraged from using the long-wearing lipsticks that we’re used to seeing – as both Helio & Apolo proudly sported lipstick kisses on their faces from their female partners. Love certainly seemed to be in the air this week…maybe they were inspired by Kirstie’s enthusiastic congratulatory smooch to Tom last week? 😛
Heidi: Well, I think Val and Karina have crushes. Don’t know what the hell the deal is with Chelsie. 😀
The “STFU Already” Award for Beating of a Dead Horse…AGAIN: Len Goodman for YET AGAIN reminding us of how shocking Sabrina’s elimination was in Season 6
Heidi: OMFG…how many times do we have to hear about this!!! Are they going to give her top of the leaderboard every week just to get the story they want at the end of the season?? “The most shocking elimination EVER finally wins!!! All is right with the fucking world.” :::rolls eyes::: I think I actually freaking screamed when he said it yet again.
Courtney: Wait…Sabrina’s elimination was shocking? Hold the phone. MIND…BLOWN. 😯
The Award for Most Intriguing Mystery of Season 15: Len Goodman for what appears to be eyeliner…on ONE eye…during the discussions about “breakthrough” dances on Tuesday Night
Heidi: What was up with that? Does he have an issue or did make-up get distracted when doing his face and slip?? I kept staring at it and wondering what the deal was. Like maybe he was taking Kenny Mayne or Jerry Rice’s role on Dance Center.
Courtney: It did look like they maybe got a little rushed…and forgot to do the other one. Maybe he’s going for the Malcolm McDowell in A Clockwork Orange look?
The Most Shocking (HA! NOT!) Choice for “Breakthrough Dance”: Carrie Ann for choosing Emmett’s very first dance
Heidi: Me thinks someone doesn’t really get the meaning of “breakthrough”. But seriously…his FIRST dance?? I think this is vajayjay talk again.
Courtney: If it was CAI’s va-jay-jay doing the thinking on that one, then I am extraordinarily curious to know what strange forces were at work when Kirstie’s waltz (where she wore a strange, unflattering pastel monstrosity of a dress, and lost a shoe) as her breakthrough dance. Was it supposed to be ironic??? 😛
Heidi: Crack is wack.
The Ego-A-Go-Go Award: Louis Van Amstel, for somehow making his dropping of Sabrina all about him & his embarrassment; (dis)honorable mention – Emmitt Smith, for “not being intimidated” by Helio, Gilles, & Apolo
Courtney: Sabrina falls – HARD – on the floor after doing a move that Louis insisted upon, and lays there groaning in pain. Louis’ first thought? “I’m sooooo embarassed!!!” Because we all know this show is all about Louis’ enormous ego…although CAI is currently giving him a good run for his money. And as for Emmitt – I know everyone thinks he “didn’t really mean anything by it”, but the fact that he said it (kidding or not) just makes him sound a bit silly to me…and like he’s not really evaluating this competition as seriously as he should. Although I think those most offended by the comment would be Joey & Drew – as they didn’t even warrant a mention 😛
Heidi: Heh…Emmitt didn’t mention Shawn either and I think at his peril. 🙂 As for Louis – it’s always all about him. Did he even ask her if she was alright BEFORE he worried about his own image?? Either way…self centered in the extreme.
Tom Bergeron Line O’ The Night: “Gilles wants to send a special hello to all of you in Clevelage, Ohio.”
Heidi: Yeah, it’s not one of his best, but it made me giggle. Best of all: Gilles reaction. See below. 🙂 Someone isn’t taking you as seriously as you demand, Gilles. He’s not giving you the respect you deserve!! LOL – go Tom.
Courtney: If you aren’t joking with the Berge, you’re against the Berge. And if you’re against the Berge…you are on my sh*t list. Although Gilles was pretty much already on my sh*t list for inumerable other reasons 😛 But I seriously hope Tom keeps knocking Gilles down a few notches each week from now on. The dude needs a reality check!
The Award for the Person Most in Need of a Sense of Humor: Gilles Marini, for reasons too numerous to list in a heading
Heidi: Seriously dude, lighten up!! First, you are not at all amused when listening to Emmitt’s pre-dance package – okay, a little bit understandable, but still – with what you’ve been saying on twitter how can you be mad at someone else saying they aren’t intimidated?? Then, there is that little spiel to the camera when backstage getting ready to dance: “Gotta do it one more time… yadda yadda yadda”…like you’re in desperate condition and an Olympian getting ready to hit the freakin’ balance beam. I have a clue for you – Olympians have more balls. Even Shawn. 🙂 Tom makes a pretty funny little quip about Clevelage, Ohio and you can barely bring yourself to crack a smile – dude, Bergeron won an Emmy and is funny as hell on a OFF day. Get over yourself. Then, when you’re called safe, all that pointing up and thanking god – why did that all feel like it was a very heavy handed play for the cameras?? Because it was?? You know, you could learn a thing or two from Joey Fatone, dude – you’re starting to really turn people OFF. And let me tell you, the matinee idol looks fade badly when the reek of desperation is in the air.
Courtney: Y’know, at this point, I think Gilles’ level of desperation, competitiveness, and overall questionable sportsmanship is actually (and I can’t believe I’m saying this) making Jaleel look tame by comparison. I’m getting sick of Gilles for all of the reasons Heidi mentioned – plus his kinda douchey behavior in the infamous “Kelly Monaco F-bomb” video leaked earlier this week (which has already been taken down – and I frankly blame Gilles), plus some positively diva-ish behind-the-scenes behavior that I’ve been hearing about. It’s such a far cry from the charming, humble, mild-mannered Gilles of 3 years ago that it makes me wonder if we Gilles’ evil twin instead…and the real, sweet Gilles is hogtied in a closet somewhere. We’ve only finished 2 weeks of competition, and I’m already seeing a lot of people get turned off of Gilles in the same way we have – and he shows no signs of stopping. If he wants to have a snowball’s chance in hell of making the finale, he needs to hope that a) the judges continue to overlook any mistakes he makes and score him generously – ALL SEASON, b) the bulk of the viewers that are voting aren’t cruising the net, or picking up on these less savory behaviors, or c) he has a revelation within the next few weeks and suddenly starts acting more like Apolo – hard-working, but still making sure to have fun and bond with his fellow castmates.
The Award for the Person Most in Need of a Good Smack Up Side DA Head: Bristol Palin, for a complete and total lack of self awareness combined with total entitlement issues, and a BIOTCH mentality.
Heidi: Boy, the list is long on this chick too. First the “This time I’ll have full control” – like when don’t you, silly girl. YOU signed the contract to be on this show. Idiot. Next was the “I’ll be so glad when this night is over” – so, did you sign a contract to be on this show simply to make Mark’s life a living hell, get your mug on TV and pimp your family and not, you know, DANCE?? Oh wait. Sorry. Stupid assed question. Of course you’re only a low rent fame whore. I think the Kardashians may have more talent than you do – and that’s saying something. I’ve never been a Mark fan at the best of times…but dang, do I feel sorry for that boy this season. Let’s not forget the confessional “I’ll get 6’s no matter what” – no, you get 6s because they want to keep you around – you only deserved a 5!! And that’s because YOU SUCK.
Does anyone sense I have anger issues where Bristol is concerned? 🙂 Of course, that doesn’t mean what I said isn’t true. 🙂
Courtney: And drawing another contrast with the Kardashians – at least people actually watch their show. And instead of getting cancelled – they get spin-offs 😛 And their trainwreckyness is actually fun to watch. What else can I say about Bristol that Heidi hasn’t already eloquently said? All I can really say is to be prepared, kids – from the murmurings I’ve heard, Bristol, like Gilles, has shown no signs of cleaning up her act. For Mark’s sake, I hope that her act wears thin on both the judges and the voters…
The Person Most in Need of a New Hard Drive: Brooke Burke for Three Verbal Fumbles, one at the opening of the results show, one introducing the pro segment and then at the end of the show when she says, “will be elim-going home.”
Heidi: The first one and the last one were the most significant. It’s not even like she really screwed up, it’s like her hard drive got hung up trying to think too hard and she got a “Warning – High Disk Usage” that made her words kinda slow down and fumble a bit. I was waiting for Tom to turn and give her a smack to get it running again. Or end the high usage process. 🙂 The last one mystified me – are they not allowed to use the word “eliminated” any more? And why not?? Is “going home” supposed to be kinder?? In reality, no one actually sleeps in the ballroom – except maybe Len – and they all go home every night, so why not “eliminated?”
Courtney: Maybe Brooke has just been using a thesaurus and decided to mix things up at the last minute. *shrug* Although it would be kind of fun to hear her try to use a new term each time…”will be ERADICATED”, “will be TERMINATED”, “will be DISCHARGED”, “will be ANNIHILATED!!!” That could actually add a whole new layer of drama to the results shows…make it more Thunderdome-ish… 😎
The “Who’s That Girl?” Award: Lacey Schwimmer for being one more blonde in a sea of blonde. (Dis) Honorable Mentions: Anya, aka Little Red Riding Hood, and that other blonde female trouper.
Heidi: Really, when it takes me a few long seconds to realize that Lacey is Lacey? You’ve had too much work done and the platinum blonde thing is WAY over done on this show. I seriously wasn’t sure it was her during her and B-word’s dance. As for Anya and that other blonde Troupe girl (is it Emma??)…really, you girls need to pick some different shades because I spent that entire dance trying to figure out who was who. I knew that Anya wasn’t Julianne, but she sure was a dead ringer for another blonde Hough – I just didn’t think that Marabeth was a professional dancer. 🙂 It was a mystery until after the show. I”ll say one thing for Oksana – you don’t have to spend anytime figuring out who she is – just a few head whips and you’ve got it. 🙂
Courtney: And actually, not to be a douchebag, but it was actually Emma “Freaky Eyes” Slater that was Red Riding Hood – can’t believe you didn’t notice, based on her strange ability to find the camera and stare directly at it for longer than what’s considered acceptable 😛 Anya was just filling out the ranks during the first and 3rd numbers – and was actually not attempting to compete for camera time, like the rest of the troupe and the Schwimmer Spawn. Anya’s my homegirl – and she’s actually a natural blonde, which is more than I can say for the rest of them…especially the she-Schwimmer, who has become such a caricature of her former self on the show that it’s not even amusing. The blindingly blonde, over-weaved ‘do, the porno-y makeup, the wild dance moves…ack. That flash & trash may work in Vegas, but it takes a lot more to impress the tv audience…
Heidi: So, it wasn’t Anya it was Emma?? I think you just proved my point. 😀 Of course, the camera work during those dances is OUT of control – it’s a wonder we can see anything.
The “ICK!” Award of the Week 2 Results Show: Benji Schwimmer for being…Benji Schwimmer
Heidi: Many of you know that I’ve had a strong negative reaction to Benji for years. Nothing has changed. He’s still an egotistical (“hey – they stole MY move!”) over-dancing fool. My reaction is oddly visceral. Can’t explain it. Don’t ask me to. 🙂
Courtney: I’m just glad he ditched the Hilter-esque bowl cut I saw him with a few years back. I think it was during the time he was all BFF with Leann Rimes – y’know, before she married smarmy Eddie Cibrian and just kinda lost her marbles. But I find the thing that bothers me the most about him is his teeth. They just seem to dominate the overall look of his face, and they kinda scare me…like they might try to gnaw off my face. Sorry, having serious Zombie Apocalypse fears…
Non-Tom Bergeron LOL Moment ‘o the Results Show: Maks, Tony and Joey in the Celebraquarium laughing and bumping into each other, with Joey asking “Slam back? What is that?” during CAI’s commentary to Bristol and Mark
Heidi: Damn that was all kinds of funny – giggling like little boys. Maks looked like a bad little boy who was relieved to know that he’s not the only one that gets hit with nonsensical Carrie Ann comments. Leave it to Joey to lay it all out there. 🙂
Courtney: See? It’s just common knowledge that Carrie Ann is a bitter hag now…and a bitter hag that is about as good at issuing threats as Gilles is at being modest. If CA wants to really scare the contestants into submission, she needs to ditch the vague threats about “slamming” that leave hapless bystanders like Joey wondering WTF she meant. She should start watching Sons of Anarchy, and take a few tips out of the Gemma Teller playbook – you’re not going to just “slam back” at Bristol, you’re going to “slam your face all the way back to Wasilla with a skateboard” if she breaks the rules again. Except that CAI will never be as badass as Katey Sagal 😛
The “Cute as Kitties and Puppies” Award of Week 2: Kelly and Val in the Celebraquarium…I mean Photo Booth. Honorable Mention: Derek/Shawn for “I believe in you” and “I love dancing with you” moments
Heidi: Of course the funniest thing was half naked Peta in the foreground practicing her moves alone while the camera catches syrupy sweetness in the back ground. Just a bit of cognitive dissonance there. 🙂 Seriously though, Kelly and Val were cute as all get out (and you all know I’m not a big fan of “cute”) with their photo booth poses. I was especially impressed with the Val who is coming out in his interactions with Kelly – VERY charming. But don’t worry, for all the sweetness there were moments of sheer WTF during the results show as well – there were just too many to list.
Courtney: Peta seems to have taken on some of the traits of her partner this season – she just seems so…harsh. But anyway! Yes, Kelly & Val are sweet as pie…and a little spicy, too, if you saw the aforementioned “F-bomb” video before it was taken down. The syrupy cuteness is ALMOST making me forgot Val’s comment about “not caring about anyone in the competition except family”…almost.
Heidi: That is a pretty toolish thing to say, for sure – but I look at it as over compensating. For a lot. 🙂
Zombie Gif of the Week:
Caption: DWTS Zombie Apocalypse
Non-Porno Gif of the Week:
Caption: Henry narrowly escapes decapitation by Mail Order Bride
Ha! everyone missed an odd “tongue thing” done by Louis just at the beginning of Bristol & Mark’s chat with Brooke. He was seriously having a moment there, lol.
Wow Lucas, I just LOVE it when the first comment on a post is someone taunting us for something we “missed” (I really have no idea what you’re talking about), instead of a “Hey, I enjoyed this – thanks for taking the time to write it!”
i’m not a giant fan on smootches in dances, but I have to say, I find Kelly and Val adorable together. I didn’t like her with Alec, and expected her to go early this season, but now i find myself casting votes for her. They just look like they’re having a great time. Their rehearsal packages are the ones I look forward to seeing, even if Kelly’s not the best female celeb in the game. The photobooth confessional was ADORABLE.
Hope you make a quick recovery, Courtney! I can just see the pros crouching in a dark corner plotting against CAI! LOL As for Brooke, maybe the thesaurus filled up her hard drive and she got an “Out Of Disk Space” error. And finally, love how the gif looks like Bruno has been sucked into a hair vortex! LOL Thanks for another great edition of cheese! 🙂
OMG, warning: Never eat dinner while reading Cheesecake (and literally either)!!! lollll SOOO FUNNY and perfect PERFECT new Porno Gif of the week too. Henry will be so pleased. I love the Zombie gif of the week too. You guys are hilarious, thanks, and I couldn’t agree more about Bristol. LOL to the bit on Len Goodman and the eyeliner.
And Lucas, sad….these girls worked so hard. Can’t you say something about what they didn’t miss?
Heidi, your hilarious breakdown of Bristol Palin has made my shitty night! I just can’t believe no one has brought up her ridiculous new chin.. Maybe next week? Lol
Pretty much agree with everything.
PEta looks so weird this season, She is pretty but I’m not seeing a lot of that this time. Hair ,make up , costume, everything just look odd for me. She posted a picture of her make up free the other day on twitter, can I just say , she is NOT that pretty at all.
On a similar topic, Lacey WHY WHY, again the hair, the make up, She used to be so beautiful back in season 7,8,9. But now she does look like a porn star, such a shame.
I can’t even comment on Gilles anymore, I’m done with him this season already.
Some one please give Oksana a haircut, that girls hair just out of control, I feel bad for all her partners, I saw a video of her dancing with Derek the other day, you can’t focus on the dance with that hair everywhere.
one more thing, it is season 15, I’m done with the judges table being use as a prop. Stop using the judges table.
Awesome, awesome, awesome ladies. Made my evening.
Now I have to go back and look for the eyeliner thing.
I loved the Derek & Shawn “syrupy sweetness” bit.
The Benji comments are hilarious. He is quite scary!-LOL
Poor Henry. That!s hilarious. I can’t believe Tom hasn’t mentioned her hair flopping yet-lol
This was hilarious. Thanks !
Courtney, I hope you get better soon.. Take care.
Cheesecake always makes me so happy. 🙂 Thank you ladies! Hope you’re feeling better Courtney. That’s scary.
Lucas, sometimes there is just SO MUCH STUFF that they provide, that it’s just too much to decide on….. Not everything gets added to the cheesecake, and C and PH do a great job sorting through it all…. They could probably provide a serving of cheesecake every day in between the shows, and still not get everything!
And with it being All Star season, and the…. Stuff that is likely going to be thrown at everyone each and every week, they’re going to have PLENTY of stuff that won’t make the cheesecake!
I enjoyed it once again, gals!
Sweet Sunday night! Great work, ladies! Agree with nearly every comment you made, particularly re: Gilles and Bristol.
Thank you for this Sunday night treat – you ladies were in rare form. I am enjoying Kelly and Val too and find smooches – real or just lipstick marks that go with the song’s lyrics- getting very tiresome and fake.
I love the caustic humor in the cheesecake awards column. Just the right amount of sarcasm and outright funny. You guys keep it real and I love how nothing is off-limits. Super kudos to all.
I hope you feel better soon Courtney, I know allergic reactions suck.
I find your idea about Brook using different terms for eliminated hilarious. I would love it if she actually did that.
Val with Kelly is the first time I’ve found him remotely attractive, physically or personalitywise. Up until now he’s always been the Randy Quaid to Maks’ Dennis Quaid for me. (Not that I like Maks anymore the way I once did years ago, but I still appreciate his physical attractiveness and superficial charm when he’s actually making an effort to be charming.) However, Val always says or does something almost immediately to ruin what little attractiveness I’ve been able to find this season, and I’m sure he will continue to do that. So he still hasn’t won me over (and I seriously doubt ever will), I just don’t dislike him quite as much as before.
Thank you ladies – well done & much appreciated! 🙂
*Comes back in to check out the Porno gif of the week again! 😀
Ditto, Vogue!
Thanks for the entertainment, ladies! 😀
You know, with how much we ridicule Oksana, how is she still on the troupe? She’s an original member even! Maybe TPTB thinks she fuels you two? hehehehe
How about a “celebrity cage death match” between CAI and Louis for the “biggest DWTS ego” award? I think I’d actually pay to see that… Either way, for us, it’s win-win. 😉
As always, ladies, the cheese was a hoot! Thanks!
Len’s eyes in that .gif!
Gee, Lucas, how about I cheesecake you, eh??
Get your own damn blog, how about that.
Geez, I was just pointing out something I thought was funny… And I’ve been quite a fan of the Cheesecake for a long while, I even commented that on previous posts… Sorry for offending everybody here, it was just not my intention. I really appreciate the effort here, that was the reason I tried to help a little bit.
Oh, so yeah, the Schwimmers tried their thing in a brother-sister dance like Julianne and Derek one year ago. Sorry. Fail. The Houghs are amazing, the Schiwmmers… not so much.
Thanks for the laughs! How scary about the allergic reaction Courtney, hope you’re feeling better.
Sophia, Len’s eyes in the Porno gif are too funny. It looks like he got an eye full.
Jim, are you still checking in again this morning? lollll
Yeahhh…don’t help us. We spent hours of our lives working on that and to have you come in and “help” on the first comment is more than a little off putting.
Love, love, love it ladies! PH, I love the cheesecake the most when its served with a generous amount of mean streak aka snark. Court, I hope you are feeling better now! The whole cheesecake was so funny, I can’t choose a favourite serving. I do have a question though. I saw the clip with Val and Kelly during the rehearsal of the bottom two, but I didn’t pay much attention to Gilles. Could you elaborate please? I don’t think Peta is very happy this season. I watch her whenever Gilles is talking or they show behind the scene clips and she is never smiling. She actually looks like she wishes Gilles would just shut up!
Thanks everyone for your concern 😀 I’m feeling much better today, now that the offending food item is out of my system! I was more annoyed by the whole thing than scared – I’m allergic to penicillin as well, and it just makes me itch like crazy if I take it by accident…last night was basically a repeat of that. Just a maddening itch on my torso. All good today, though 😉
I’m glad everyone enjoyed the cake 🙂
Haha…love it. Great work ladies!!!!!!!!
Great work as always! Love the Peta hair pic….and the Oksana-Henry bit….and the annoying Bristol snarf….and totally agree with the porno-playmate-wannabe Lacey. I think I miss the old Lacey. You found such great Cheesecake material. Giles was bugging me and I thought it was just me-now I have validation! Can’t wait to see what you come up with next week,
I already apologized, and I guess it won’t happen EVER again. So I’m just laughing it off as a misunderstanding. “I slammed you guys in the face with my lack of good-effort recognizing and, guess what… slam back”.
Wickedly funny as usual…TY ladies. Courtney, glad you survived the allergic reaction…and YES! the Colts did beat the Pack! That had to be a soothing balm to your itches…and made me some awesome Fantasy Football points.
Thanks for the comments. I needed a laugh! So true about the hair whipping around on the female
troupe dancers. Every time I see their hair slapping the faces of their male partners I think they’re going to take out an eye on the poor guys faces. Although Peta should have kept her long hair–I liked it better.
I am giving all my votes to Apolo and Karina. They are my favorites this season.
Thanks for all the hard work, ladies; I didn’t see the show, but reading this was almost like being there, except my TV is still in one piece since nothing was thrown at it.
Question: Does CAI even have a background in ballroom dance? A quick look at Wiki (yeah, I know) doesn’t mention it. If she has no training or experience in these dances, she really, REALLY needs to get off that high horse.
If Emma is a camera hog, I guess she and Sasha (“I should be a pro! Tweet everyone every five minutes and tell them I should be a pro!”) Farber are the perfect, self-promoting couple.
As to Peta, pretty or not? She reminds me of that Seinfeld episode, where he dated a girl who looked gorgeous or hideous, depending on the light she was in. Peta’s far from hideous, but I think she falls more into the “plain” or “handsome” category than typically pretty. The right styling and photography do wonders for her.
Marvelous effort as always, ladies. So glad you’re feeling better today Court.
You hit so many of my favorite moments and peeves this week, I swear you two are psychic!
The non-porno gif of the week is priceless! Can’t stop watching it. Len looking right up one of the Troupette’s skirt … Oksana’s hair?!? Girlfriend, word of warning: don’t you mess up Henry. Let’s put the new guy in front of Mailorder next time, okay?
I can’t stand Louis. His ego and attitude are horrible. His first, and only, concern when he dropped Sabrina should have been to Sabrina and by putting himself first, he just shows what a fool he is. I’m tired of hearing about her early elimination. It’s done, leave it in the past where it belongs and move on. I agree with Courtney. Gilles is beginning to look very, very desperate to win this and in the process, making Jaleel look good. He needs to lighten up ALOT and learn to have fun. He was given a second chance at this competition, he should enjoy it. I’m sure there are a lot of past celebrities that would have loved the opportunity and wouldn’t be as irritating as he is becoming more and more each week. I lost all respect for Emmitt after his comment about the actor, race car driver and speed skater. I don’t care if he later said it was a joke, it shouldn’t have been said. With the exception of the actor, the other two are doing way better than he is. Then there’s Bristol. I cannot state how much I’m hoping her having “creative” control this week is what finally gets her eliminated. Heidi is right. She signed the contract to get her and her family back in public view and, in my opinion, really doesn’t want to be there. I’m not a Mark fan, never have been, but I too feel sorry for him. She can’t dance, has an attitude and her whining about getting 6’s was ridiculous. She didn’t even deserve those. With the troupe dance, I didn’t even realize which one was Lacey until the very end of the dance. She didn’t look like herself, and with all the other blondes, she gets lost. Except, I agree, Oksana. Can’t miss her hair whipping around. I don’t think they’re allowed to say eliminated anymore. It’s like award shows. They can’t say and the winner is anymore because they’re all winners being nominated. Saying eliminated is probably too harsh for some of the egos to handle, and saying going home is kinder. Courtney and Heidi, thanks for these! It’s a sure smile for me every week. Your work is appreciated.
another yummy success – THANK YOU <3 <3
always good to start the work week with a good belly laugh. thank goodness I long ago learned to put down my cup/my glass/my spoon/my fork before entering the bakery LOL
Lucas -LOL #35, thanks for having a sense of humor, it's often difficult to convey what you intend when you only have your fingers to do the talking; misunderstandings happen all the time.
#3 Mimi Does anyone know where I can see the photobooth confessional with Val & Kelly ? Thanks
Carol, the photobooth is in the week 2 confessionals. the video is on the main show site and youtube
Are we voting for THE DANCE or a popularity contest? Joey Fatone said it best “I feel crazy.” Everyone in the rare atmosphere of First Class Alpha and being friendly at the same time…crazy. Only Emmett, Kirstie and Maks (Toni and Melissa maybe) have the sense of “not the end of the known world” seasoning. What hasn’t DWTS seen yet? A real shooting match? Steps on a high beam? Dancing on hands? Ripping around a curve with just enough bank not to spill or choreographed spill and recovery? Block and Tackle? What’s the matter with rules that define a dance? Holding too hard for these athletes? Darn, Joey was FUN and good. About teeth-what does everyone see in the Queen of Teeth? I just don’t get Sabrina mania? JUST my thoughts.
I don’t get the hype around Sabrina either. She wasn’t the first shocking elimination, and she sure as hell wasn’t the last. She was eliminated because people didn’t vote for her. End of story. Stop rubbing it in our faces like we did something wrong, judges.
And Lacey…oh God, Lacey…the hair bothered me, and her rear end looked enormous in those yellow pants. Benji has always creeped me out, to be honest.
Ladies thanks so much for the great laughs and I have to say I agree with all of them. Courtney so glad you are feeling better. I was going to say a whole bunch of things, but @Cindy you pretty much covered how I feel.
Just want to say if Bristol survives a double elimination week, then this season (for me) will be one big disappointment. I just hope the voters vote for who should be there and leave all the other stuff out of it. I have heard that some people won’t vote for someone who has won before. I don’t understand that logic. JMO
Thanks again for the great laughs.
I missed Len in the porno gif the first time around… What a dirty old fart! 🙂 He was gettin’ himself an eye-full, wasn’t he? And he probably didn’t have a thing to say concerning “messin’ about”. 😀
What’s Matthew Lillard’s picture doing on the cheesecake awards? I didn’t know he was a ballroom dancer HA! 🙂
I cannot believe that Bristol can survive a double elimination. I agree with Gail, #46, vote for who deserves to be there, not to screw up the results and keep someone who can’t dance and doesn’t want to be there.
I can’t stop laughing you girls do a great job. Petas hair to me was so strange it looked like a roosters cockscomb….I keep saying she needs a good stylist!
THANK YOU HEIDI AND COURTNEY!!!
This is just what I needed after a week of pain in the ass college work and real work.
You two are great! I cannot wait until the next cheesecake.
OMG, the side-splitting laughs!! Thank you Heidi and Courtney for this hilarious, witty and “right-on-the-money” cheesecake. You tell it like it is! Your comment about the Berge needing to smack Brookebot to get her hard drive in gear again, was hysterical but true! And the silly Schwimmers: poor Lacey, what a mess: she used to be so pretty but now looks like a plasticized doll and the hair color is just wrong. And Benji…he does overdance as you said! I agree they for sure aren’t the Houghs, but back in the day, on old you tube videos, imo they were a cute bro/sis team. Not any more. All your hard work and creative commentary is amazing and so appreciated! Thanks again for this yummy cheese-fest!!
I just want to say thanks to mods!! This site is amazing! Long story short, it’s been a long 24 hours for me. But honest to God, all day I’ve been thinking “When I get home, I can read the Cheesecake Awards & then DWTS will be on”. Courtney & Heidi, thank you once again for making my day by serving some extra delicious cheesecake. It’s much appreciated!! xo
I agree with you guys about Gilles. He seems to be taking this friendly competition a little too seriously. I understand it means a lot to him (and I’m sure it’d mean a lot to me, too) but seriously, lighten up dude. Have fun, man. That’s what this show is all about, right?
OMG, the laughs!! Thank you Heidi and Courtney for this hilarious, witty and “right-on-the-money” cheesecake. You tell it like it is! Your comment about the Berge needing to smack Brookebot to get her hard drive in gear again, was hysterical but true! And the Schwimmers: poor Lacey. I agree, she used to be so pretty but now her looks are all just wrong for her. And Benji…he does overdance as you said! All your hard work and creative commentary is amazing and so appreciated! Thanks again for this yummy cheese-fest!! And glad you feel better Courtney!
Wow, I had a blast reading this recap!! I even laughed at the Benji comments despite being a Benji fan! And yeh, I don’t even recognize Lacey anymore. In fact, I confess that I didn’t recognize Benji doing the Helio dance! When they did that cartwheel move, I thought “how weird that they’re doing that Benji thing!” DUH!
I’m sad that Gilles is acting like a jerk. To be honest, I’ve been watching The Voice so I only catch bits and pieces of DWTS so I haven’t witnessed his behavior. Hmmm! I’ll have to tune in more often because I’ve been voting for him and Apolo!
And perhaps someone’s already said this weeks ago, but I just want to say that I think it’s unfair that some stars get to have the same pro partner. They should all get different partners. I think it’s an unfair advantage to have the same pro partner, especially for those who won (eg. Emmett/Cheryl). Do others think the same?
Keep up the great recat…hehe I mean recap!
I’m really enjoying everything! keeping my comments to myself for now. i’d still like to place an ad on your site for my ballroom dance book (BALLROOM WORLD DANCE BOOK,468 pages 300 dance pictures) but can’t seem to get anyone to e-mail me … allen darnel, dance teacher
please how long will it be before cai gets a REAL life. She really needs to be replaced. Or get rid of saying you did well, BUT.