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PureDWTS Season 29, Week 5 – Power Rankings

Soooo…I can’t be the only one who wonders what the Russian pros (minus Artem, he’s an angel) did to piss off the hair department this week, right? 😛 What in the name of Party City Clearance Bin was on Gleb & Val’s heads??? I think the conclusion Mama Spence and I came to was some unholy abomination born of Mandy Patinkin in The Princess Bride, the owner of the Oakland/Las Vegas Raiders, and this man looking for love in an 80’s dating service video:


Alan only got off marginally better than the other two, with what looks to be a discount version of Vicki Lawrence’s wig from Mama’s Family:

I don’t know if Tyrant is becoming more tolerable, or if everything else in this year is such a flaming dumpster fire by comparison and I’m just getting used to her particular brand of annoyance, but I found her MILDLY less annoying this week. MILDLY. But I will say I found it super-duper sketch when she brought up the whole elimination gaffe from last week again, and it makes me wonder if there’s more to it than simply being a control room “whoops”. Sis seemed awfully defensive about it, and eager to “set the record straight” – to which I say “Sure, Jan.” And so far, everyone that has fallen into the bottom two and been saved has ended up in the bottom two again and gotten flushed out the following week. But this week, Monica manages to avoid it altogether, owing to some awfully generous scoring for what I would consider a fairly weak tango? Just makes my brain itch. I don’t know to what end strings are being pulled, but it just adds to the stench of this season for me.

Well, in the aforementioned unexpected twist, Monica managed to stay completely safe this week, and it was Vernon and Jesse who took a tumble into the “Danger Zone” (seriously – of all the songs they could have resurrected for 80’s week, why not this one???).  Jesse was ultimately flushed out in a unanimous vote by the judges, and while I feel like he had plateaued (and even backslid) in the past two weeks, I am still a skosh disappointed that we lost him, because I do feel like he was trying; I feel like the one thing that gave Vernon a leg up over him, though, is that Vernon seems to take criticism from the judges and let it fuel him, while Jesse only seemed drained by it. Maybe it was for the best that he left sooner rather than later, as the weekly criticism seemed to be taking its toll on Jesse; but it still irks me that he and Sharna got screwed with music at least half the time, and I feel like that did play a major role in some of their dances being a bit lackluster. Their song this week had some really strange tempo changes that even Mama Spence noticed (and she will be the first to tell you she lacks all rhythm), so I’m inclined to cut them a bit of a break for some of their more awkward routines.

Given that it was a theme week, we of course had some songs that weren’t ideal for the dance that was being done to them, and most of the pros had to sacrifice a bit of content in favor of upholding the “spirit” of 80’s week…so I’m being a bit more lenient on filler/time wasters this week. I also have beaucoup gifs this week, so bear with me 😉 Read more..

October 13, 2020 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, baker, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble.

DWTS13 Week 5 Power Rankings

COWABUNGA!!! I don’t know about you guys, but I sure had fun during 80s night 8) I love how it brought out the fun side in all of the couples.  Plus it felt like I was listening to the 80s mix on my iPod.  Always a plus 😉

Can’t say I’m terribly surprised at how things stacked up tonight, although I hope that the voting does help a few couples who I’m not quite ready to let go of yet.  Gotta say – song selection tonight really seemed to trip some up and help others out.  Hope it’s not the final nail in the coffin for a few couples!

1.) JR & Karina – I definitely breathed an audible sigh of relief about 15 seconds into this dance when I realized that JR was gonna slay it, instead of going down in flames like I thought he would with that wretched song 😛 It was one of the better sambas I’ve seen on the show – JR managed to cut loose and really get his hips working in a way that most celebs attempting the samba can’t.  The bounce wasn’t quite there, but he more than made up for it in sheer energy & fun.  The dude even managed to do SEVERAL samba rolls in a row! Quite a feat, considering my bf doesn’t even like to do them in competition…let alone teach them to newbies.  And best of all – it was nice to finally see him getting proper credit from the judges, both in comments and in critiques. No wishy-washy “8” paddles, no “Well, it was pretty good, BUT-“…just a sincere, “Well done, JR!” Considering the kinda crazy points spread tonight, I think the likelihood of them being in danger is about the same as Len doing the Safety Dance tomorrow night 😉

2.) Ricki & Derek – Wish I could say these two conquered their crummy song the same way JR did, but unfortunately Heidi & I’s qualms about “Easy Lover” as a foxtrot weren’t unfounded – this dance felt awkward & disjointed, although not necessarily terrible in the technique department.  The judges were right about one thing – the parts in hold were actually quite lovely, and were indeed a proper foxtrot.  The parts not in hold weren’t quite so lovely, but in the same token, why harp on someone for doing the Roger Rabbit if it’s freakin’ 80s week? It’s not like they did it for a very long time, and I felt like it was in the character of the dance, with the “80s prom” kinda theme it had going on.  It’s the same beef I had with the judges last season when they ripped apart Ralph’s “Sweet Home Alabama” samba – honestly, what did you expect them to do, given the song & the theme? *sigh* Whatever…I kind of expected them to manipulate things so that Ricki had an “off” week, so I can’t say I’m shocked and awed.  Just annoyed, as usual 🙂 I wouldn’t go so far as to say they’re completely safe (the points spread this week is looking pretty precarious…), but I will say that I think there are couples more LIKELY to head home.  Besides, they might benefit from a bit of rage-driven power voting this week, since the judges decided to be asshats 😛  Read more..

October 17, 2011 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, baker, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble.