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DWTS Season 12, Week 2 – Dancing by the Numbers

Well, a little bit of a shake up on the leader board – the top three and the bottom two remain the same, but a bit of juggling in the middle. Last week, Chelsea was solidly in 4th place, but she has fallen to 6th place due to out of the box choreography by Mark – as predicted in the comments by yours truly. It didn’t help her that others upped their game. Great dance, not enough Jive – where have I heard that before? 🙂 At least Len’s a tiny bit consistent – although he let that monkey thing go last season. Still haven’t gotten over that. Where was I…?

The Judges Scores and Percentages

Place Celebrity Score Percentage
1. Ralph 45 10.61
2. Hines 44 10.38
3. Kirstie 43 10.14
4. Chris 42 9.91
5. Romeo 42 9.91
6. Chelsea 39 9.2
7. Kendra 37 8.73
8. Petra 36 8.49
9. Sugar Ray 34 8.25
10. Wendy 31 7.31
11. Mike 30 7.08

What did I love? As I said before, I thought that Chelsea and Mark’s dance was a great dance but somewhat lacking in Jive content…but my faves are currently the Top 3. I’m afraid I have a mad crush on Ralph AND Hines and I wanna be Kirstie when I grow up. Way to go, girl – lay a big wet one on the goofy Russian. 🙂 Seriously, there is no one I dislike on this cast at all (for now, anyway) and I actually enjoyed most of them for one reason or another.

Hee…someone owes me a drink. Mark did have polka dots (his tie, her panties) and short pants. 🙂 It was different than his norm, but they were still present. Loved Chelsea’s outfit, though, which is VERY unusual for Mark’s Jive costumes. 🙂

Chris jumps up to fourth place!! What an improvement on all fronts – love his British accent too. 🙂 Speaking of accents, how much do I love Kym Johnson?? Talking street with Hines in that little girl Aussie accent. 🙂 Kendra also improved and I thought she looked lovely – and I felt for her tonight. She did go a long way though to busting out of that stereotype the show (and Louis) have been trying to stick her in. Wendy also improved, but Tony put in too much crap at the beginning – took too long for the dance to get started.

Who’s going home?? Well, I’m going to say that Ralph, Hines, Kirstie and Chelsea are safe, no problem. Chelsea got raked by Len which generally means her and Mark’s fans will go insane with the voting. Ralph, Hines and Kirstie just have too much of a spread from Mike to be in any danger at all. Barring shock of shocks, of course.

The person in the greatest danger is, of course, Mike – he of the gorgeous smile.  He improved this week a lot, but he suffers from being relatively unknown. His strength is that he has Lacey as a partner and she’s pretty popular…and he’s gorgeous and funny.  What does he have to do to stick around?  Well, he needs about 2,360 more votes per million votes cast to stay over Wendy. Is this likely? Not really, judging by what people say about Wendy’s fanbase.

So who else could go if Mike gets votes and Wendy does as well?  Well, I think Petra is in a lot more danger than either Sugar Ray or Wendy. It’s the Audrina syndrome all over again, although Audrina was a much better dancer.  Petra, beautiful and sweet, just gets lost in a sea of bigger personalities and her dance was not nearly as good as the judges made it out to be. Her Jive made me think of Shannon Elizabeth – but Dmitry is a lot quieter than Derek. Don’t get me wrong – I love Petra. But I worry for her. What would it take for Petra to leave over the bottom three?? ALL of the following must happen for Petra to leave:

Mike gets 14155 more votes per million votes cast; and

Wendy gets 11800 more votes per million votes cast; and

Ray gets 4728 more votes per million votes cast.

Will this happen? Nah, probably not. 🙂 I think Wendy and Ray can get the votes, but I don’t think Mike can muster it up – at least not that much.  He’s just not well known enough, IMO, to get upwards of 14k more votes than her.

Sooooo….I think this is a fairly easy call: Bye Mike, I will miss your gorgeous smile. 🙂

March 29, 2011 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS Season 12 Week 2- The Couples Reactions After Their Dance (Videos)

We have some fun interviews after the show from ABC in Los Angeles to share with you with the couples reactions to their second dances and more. This interviewer has to be one of my favorites. He doesn’t ask dumb questions and he seems to really know the show. He seems like a true fan as much as we are. So, let’s get right to it.

Here’s a recap;

Mike and Lacey felt better about their performance. They hope they can continue and build on it, but, Mike’s afraid tonight will be his last night.;

Kirstie wasn’t as pleased with her performance. She thought she could do better. Her and Maks also talk about their spontaneous kiss when asked about it and get embarrassed. They can’t stop laughing. It’s so cute.

Chris is getting more comfortable on the show. They had so much fun and met their goals. Cheryl mentions what an even competition it is this year.

Kym praises Hines for doing so well last night. She’s so proud to have him as a partner. He says he’s going to keep working as hard as he can and doing whatever she says.

Romeo wanted to tackle the criticism from last week and it made him work that much harder. Chelsie was so pleased when Len said they had the best dance of the night.

Petra says she’s having the most fun. She just wants to keep ‘living in the moment’ and ‘dance with a purpose’ as long as she can.

Mark and Chelsea talk about ‘taking a chance’ and they have no regrets even after the judges disapproving of their dance. Mark said their performance felt powerful and really good. He also thinks the judges should have scolded him and not Chelsea. They should have given her the score she deserved. The pop song they gave him inspired him to design the choreography. (after hearing his side, I can definitely understand how he was inspired now)

Kendra wasn’t satisfied with their dance. They plan to keep working hard and Louis says it’s ok to screw up and she needs to get over her fears. Next week he wants to show people how hot her legs are. 😯

Karina couldn’t be more pleased with having Ralph as a partner. He understands her even when she doesn’t speak. Ralph says she pushed him and he is glad and wants to keep being challenged to do his very very best.

Sugar Ray wants to keep working on his technique and getting better. Anna talks about how important it is to “feel” everything he’s learning and the scores will come.

Wendy defends her dance last week and feels she’s been moving in the right direction from the start. But, it’s been a challenge with how busy she is. Tony says we wouldn’t believe how much Wendy has improved since they met and that’s what matters.

Shew! What a night!! I don’t want to see any of them go yet. 🙁

I Written By

I'm a fashion and music fan....and I have always loved dancing too of any kind. Dancing With The Stars seems to have this way of bringing all of those things together. One of my favorite dancing quotes at the moment: "No matter what, nobody can take away the dance you've already had...." ~Gleb Savchenko . To view my photography site, see Lisa Kay Photography.

DWTS Season 12, Week 2 – Who’s Dancing What…and When?

From what I hear, our week 2 dances are the Quickstep and the Jive. Presumably, those who danced Foxtrot last week will be dancing Jive this week and those who had Cha Cha will be dancing Quickstep. Important to note – each couple keeps the same phone number throughout the competition and they will no longer coincide with dance order (if they did last week…I never checked). The only way we will know dance order is if the celebs or their pros tweet it over the next day or so. Check back here often, I’ll add info as it becomes available.

ETA: Programming Note – President Obama is scheduled to speak at 7:30 pm Eastern time (6:30 Central) and is supposedly going to be done in 30 minutes. This should not impact DWTS. If he goes over, the show is LIIIVE (tm Tom Bergeron) in the Eastern and Central time zones, so I think they can just delay the start of the show by however long he goes over. They delay programming all the time, I see no reason why they wouldn’t tonight.  It should have no impact whatsoever on the Mountain and Pacific time zones, unless they get the President on tape too. 🙂 UPDATE: According to Louis’ Twitter, he’s spoken to the producers and has been assured that the president’s speech will not go over time. Phew!

Ralph and Karina – Jive
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.08

Kenda and Louis – Quickstep
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.07 – dancing 2nd, per Louis’ Twitter.

Chelsea and Mark – Jive
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.01
Poor Chelsea. LOL 🙂

[blackbirdpie url=”″]

Mike and Lacey – Jive
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.10

Wendy and Tony – Quickstep
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.02

Kirstie and Maks – Quickstep
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.11

Romeo and Chelsie – Quickstep
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.05

Chris and Cheryl – Quickstep
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.09

Hines and Kym – Quickstep
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.03

Sugar Ray and Anna – Jive
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.06 – dancing 1st, per Anna’s Twitter.

Petra and Dmitry – Jive
Voting Number: 1.800.VOTE4.04

And we get a tiny hint about “The Troupe” from Peta:

[blackbirdpie url=”″]

March 27, 2011 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS Season 12, Week 1 – Dancing by the Numbers

A new season, a whole new set of calculating and prognosticating. To anyone new to this site, this is one of the series that we’ve been carrying on for a few seasons now; if you want to read what the calculations were for previous seasons, you should be able to find them by searching “dancing by the numbers”. You can find last season’s starting here —> Dancing by the Numbers Season 11.

Anyway, what I do in this series is calculate the standings according to the rules of DWTS. The way DWTS works is, each dancer is given a score. That score is then divided by the total number of points awarded on that night; that is, all the couple’s scores added together. That yields a percentage for each couple which counts for HALF of their combined score, the audience vote being the other half. The audience vote is handled the same way; the total number of votes cast is divided into the number of votes for a given couple, yielding their percentage of the audience votes. The judges percentage is added to the audience percentage for a combined total score. The couple with the lowest combined score goes home.

Now, we’re talking about first week scores with no elimination in the first week. The couples get a chance to dance again before anyone is eliminated. As a result, this is just a “where we stand before Dance number 2” post – absolutely everything could change after the second dance. Consider this a practice post. 🙂

So, what are our Judges percentages??

Dancers Percentage of the Judges scores

Ralph = 11.54%
Kirstie = 11.06%
Hines = 10.10%
Chelsea = 10.10%
Chris = 9.13%
Romeo = 9.13%
Petra = 8.65%
Sugar Ray = 8.65%
Kendra = 8.65%
Wendy = 6.73%
Mike = 6.25%

Obviously, Mike and Wendy are in the most danger going into week 2. I think Wendy is likely safe based solely on being more well known than Mike is – which is a shame because I found Mike to be relatively funny and definitely cute. Wendy? I dunno, I felt bad for Tony (whether he deserves it or not 🙂 ) because she seems kinda like a mess already.

Barring disaster, Ralph, Kirstie, Hines and Chelsea are likely to be very, very safe. I’m going to guess that their week 2 dances won’t change that. What can change is the middle of the pack and the bottom of the pack; everyone is switching from latin to ballroom or vice versa and the change in style could have a severe impact on the weaker dancers. Of course, if any of the 4 I mentioned crash badly, they’ll be in trouble too – but they benefit from going into week 2 with fairly high scores.

For example, Mike as the low scorer is 3.85% away from Hines and Chelsea, who are tied for 3rd place. This equates to 38.5k votes. As a relative unknown, Mike is unlikely to catch either Hines or Chelsea. Same goes for Ralph and Kirstie.

As for Wendy, the difference between her and Mike is only 0.48%, which equates to 4,810 votes. This is practically equivalent to zero if we were talking about two celebrities who were on equal footing…but we’re not. We’ll have to wait and see how both Mike and Wendy do on dance number 2, but it’s hard for me to believe that Mike, a relative unknown, can make up that differential. Now, if he kicks butt on his next dance and Wendy doesn’t?? All bets are off. 🙂

On to Monday! I usually post my stats on Tuesday morning – check back here to see how we do. 🙂

I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

Dancing with the Stars Season 12, Week 1 – The Cheesecake Awards!!

We’re Baaaaack!!! It’s easy, it’s cheesey, it’s Dancing With The Stars!!! For those new to this site, Courtney and I hand out weekly awards for the funniest, cheesiest and occassionally most annoying aspects of this show. Sometimes we’re serious, sometimes we’re silly…and sometimes we’re dirty. Well, I’m dirtier than Courtney. More practice. 🙂 Mostly, we pick on the show and all the people involved in it. WARNING: if you are a hypersensitive fan of someone on the show, check your sensitivity at the door. We even pick on the people WE like. 🙂

On with the show…

The Award for Most Unintended Innuendo: Chelsea Kane

Heidi: This is mostly my brain at work on a glass (or two) of wine. When Chelsea says, “Yes, I got to kiss Joe Jonas. It didn’t suck” I confess my first thought was “Oh, you poor thing, he didn’t….” Oh. Wait. Totally not what she’s talking about.

Courtney: Pretty sure the purity ring would have gotten in the way.

Award for Most Intended Innuendo (That Went Over Most Everyone’s Head): Bruno to Chelsea – “You started on your back, you ended on your back, and everything in between was pure afterglow!”

Courtney: Was I the only one who raised an eyebrow to this? 😉 Somehow I think Bruno might have gotten the order mixed up a bit, though…doesn’t the afterglow come after the main event, and not during? Then again, maybe my boudoir adventures have tended towards the tame…or maybe Bruno likes to do things completely out of order.  Best part: I don’t think Mark or Chelsea really picked up on the blantant innuendo of it…or if they did, they played it off quite well.  Can’t imagine that Mark didn’t pick up on that one…;-)

Heidi: Oh, all my eyebrows were raised. 🙂 And where the hell was Tommy B. in this?? No way did he let that comment slide! Oh, Wait. He saw the purity ring and figured it was pointless. Or more uncomfortable. As for Mark, well, he’s been thinking about that for a while…

Award for the Earliest Start to a Showmance: Mark Ballas

Heidi: Kissing, rolling around on the floor, teasing…dude has a thing for chaste girls named Chelsea (ie)? 😉 How long until he whips out the guitar and serenades her to calm her down?

Courtney: This may be a record even for Mark – getting smoochy with his partner during their first rehearsal?! What’s the next step…canoodling in the Celebraquarium? Or do we move directly to the weekends in Napa/rosepetals on the bed/satin sheets phase of the relationship?

Heidi: You forgot the candles.

The Award for Most Hip Analogy by a Sixty Year Old: Len Goodman and his BEP reference.

Heidi: So, in Len’s mind the BEP are a crazy mess? Because I’m pretty sure that when he said Chelsea’s Foxtrot went all “Black Eyed Peas” in the middle, it was NOT a compliment. 🙂

Courtney: Blech.  I hate the Peas. And Len is right – they’re a crazy mess.  Didn’t you see the Superbowl??? They had to bring in Usher midway through the performance to save the day. Almost as hot a mess as Xtina flubbing the national anthem…almost.

Heidi: Oh, they were indeed a mess – interesting analogy for good ole Len, though. 🙂

The Award for Most Schizophrenic Backstage Crew Members (AKA: Award for Backstage Crew Members with an Unhealthy Fixation on the Three Bears): The Hair Department.

Heidi: I found Anna’s hair to be TOO BIG, but Lacey’s hair was too small…while Petra’s hair was juuuust right. Seriously, how can they do such a beautiful job on Petra’s hair (and others) then go so huge on Anna that her head looks like it belongs in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade? And me thinks they just avoid Lacey altogether cause that girl looked like she hadn’t seen shampoo in a month. L’Oreal is your friend, sister – the brunette shade. Gawd, that was some seriously bad hair, two tone AND oily. Ick.

Courtney: Anna looked like either Miss Texas USA 1976 or June Carter Cash’s redheaded Russian cousin.  Country bumpkin hair TO THE MAX.  Lacey…looked like trailer trash.  Sorry, but she did. Those roots look ridiculous against the fried blonde of the rest of her hair.  I sure hope the hair department either mandates a color change or finds a way to hide her roots with a headband or something next week.  Petra was a vision – reminded me of a young Ingrid Bergman.  Just lovely. 🙂

Most Boobage Ever to Appear on DWTS Award: Wendy Williams

Heidi: To quote Spamalot, “she has huuuge tracts of laaand.” Anyone who has seen that musical will immediately see the hand motions that go with that line and hear the British accent.

Courtney: The first glimpse I caught of Wendy making her way down those glittery stairs nearly blinded me.  All I could see was BOOBS for days! And this wasn’t in the same class as Kym’s Awesome Boobage (TM); these were scary boobs – looked like they might jump out and bite me if I wasn’t careful.  Kids, this is the reason your parents told you not to sit so close to the TV – renegade boobs could gravely injure you. 

Heidi: Just imagine if you had 3-D TV and you were wearing the glasses. It would be like…well, scary.

Moment of the Night that Shouldn’t be Hurl-worthy but was: Dmitry and Declaring the War of the Chests

Heidi: Automatic FAIL. I think I might have gagged aloud. And yes, I am a straight female. 🙂 And no, I don’t know why I have that reaction. Maybe it’s the implied arrogance. And yes, I know the producers write a lot of that crap that goes into the opening, but I MUCH prefer the way Derek reads his lines (I’m rough, I’m tough, I’m Derek Hough) and then laughs his little tiny butt off like it’s one of the most ridiculous thing EVER. And it was. Until now.

Courtney: I think my analogy to Heidi on Twitter went something like this: “Dmitry is like a housecat to Tony’s panther & Maks’ lion.” This was just so…feeble.  It may as well have been Milton from Office Space (“I’d really like my stapler back, p-p-please.”) up there challenging Mark & Maks to a chest-off.  And while we’re on that topic – I think Tony’s chest is more formidable than Mark’s.  And it may be more formidable than Maks’, even.  Dude is DIESEL…quite possibly the most cut of the male pros.  He could be freebasing protein shakes or something, who knows. 

The Award for Getting Away with Breaking the Most Unwritten Rules in One Night: Dmitry Chaplin

Heidi: I might actually have to give him props because if you’re going to break rules (or hit on the judges pet peeves), it sure is best to get it out of the way on the first night when they’re feeling very forgiving. A lift AND having your partner sit on her ass in the audience AND fussing about (TM Len) with your jacket all in one dance?? Okey Dokey then, buddy, you got LUCKY.

Courtney: I think Dmitry also lucked out in having Petra – I think it’s impossible for anyone to hate her.  She’s just so SAINTLY.  I have a feeling they could have done multiple, INTENTIONAL lifts, been completely off-time, futzed around in the audience, and messed with a coat, a feather duster, a table, and an orangutan and still gotten a reprieve from the judges.  And I wouldn’t blame them…she’s the Mother Theresa of the modeling world 🙂

LOL Moment of the Night – Female: Anna Trubunskaya, “I will break you into a dancer” with requisite RUSSIAN Accent; Honorable Mention to Carrie Ann for “Chippendale’s Cha Cha”

Heidi: I love Anna – that was a truly goofy line delivered in this Cold War Russian accent that implied torture was not far behind. And that was actually a pretty clever line from Carrie Ann and she’s not really known for clever lines.

Courtney: Some episodes of DWTS feel like Coming to America to me – except instead of Eddie Murphy, we have Anna 🙂 She learns about American sports (remember the Walter Payton vs. Belka & Strelka analogy last season?), she dances to songs she clearly never heard until she came to America (“Hella Good”?), and she says funny, stereotypically-Russian things like this and makes it totally adorable 🙂 As for Carrie Ann – I’m not gonna credit her with that one.  I’ll credit her va-jay-jay for that one…cause that was clearly what was doing all the talking when she was critiquing & scoring Chris’ cha-cha. *eye roll*

LOL Moment of the Night – Male: Bruno Tonioli, “Call me, Daphne”

Heidi: Just LOL – no clue what he was getting at, don’t remember what he was talking about, but I have a feeling that Tommy B. called him Daphne for hours afterward.

Courtney: I think it was to Ray – a guy I’m not so sure quite understood the humor of it.  Awwwwwkwwwwarrrrd.

TMI/Grossest Moment of the Night: Kendra – “I just went into your butt crack.”

Heidi: :::gag::: Oh, I so did NOT need to hear that. Or visualize it. Or anything it. Really, the blame has to go to the producers – seriously boys, out of all the hours of video you got of these two, you went with THIS???

Courtney: Kendra’s whole package seemed to be a montage of her just saying stupid shit. “My hips don’t lie!” “I’ve got moves for a white girl!” Are they deliberately TRYING to paint her as a crass bimbo? Cause so far, it seems to be working. As for this particular comment…I wouldn’t go near Louis’ butt crack with a ten foot pole.  Errr…bad phrase to use…let’s move on…:-/

Heidi: Damn, I worked so hard with my brain to NOT go there and then you went there. 🙂

WTF Moment of Costuming: Brooke’s Dress with Audrey Hepburn’s hat stitched on to the front.

Heidi: You know, Brooke is beautiful. And this dress was beautiful too…but when I get distracted by that large round hat that appeared to be stitched to the front, it’s probably not a dress she should wear on the show. I spent way too much time trying to figure out what the hell that was, beyond simple ornamentation. Is it a fan? Is it a hat? Didn’t Audrey Hepburn wear that in Breakfast at Tiffany’s? WTF?

Courtney: It’s a satellite dish so she can get better reception from the control booth when they’re feeding her lines, duh! I just have to wonder if they had to strategically plan Brooke’s route through the studio to avoid narrow spaces…she could have gotten stuck, y’know. 🙂

Most Overdone Running Joke: Master P’s bad scores; (dis)honorable mention for reminding Hines several times that he’d lost the Superbowl

Courtney: Hardy har har har, Master P got the worst score in DWTS history.  It’s funny once – but 3, 4, and 5 times? It’s just getting annoying and makes me wonder if they have nothing else to talk about.  The only truly funny instance to me was when Mike joked about his own scores, saying “Well my dad is Master P, so it’s not so bad.”  And then the near constant “So Hines, you lost the Superbowl…” intro.  By the 3rd time, I think he had just permanently plastered that grin on his face to keep from rolling his eyes.  It’s ok, Hines – everything sounds more annoying coming out of Brooke’s mouth. Just smile and nod and she’ll go away eventually.

Heidi: And to think we’re only in Week 1! Hines might do an endzone dance on her head if she keeps it up. “I’ll show you losing the Superbowl!!!” As for Master P?? Bad idea, since half the viewers likely didn’t know who he is. They do now thanks to YouTube. Poor Romeo.

March 24, 2011 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS 11, Week 2 Media – Part IV

Okay, I hated what Bruno said….but Michael, get over it already. Entertainment Tonight:

Audrina on ET – this Michael thing ain’t going away anytime soon.

The Situation – Paparazzi are bizarre people.

Chelsie on her charity work and Latisse…and the Situation. She’s a cutie, for sure.

Jennifer on Ellen

Jennifer and Derek on Ellen

October 2, 2010 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS 11, Week 3 Media – Part III

Tom was on George Lopez last night and I saw this little ad for it – If I find more I’ll post it. Looks to be Tom Bergeron at his best. 😉

The Sitch and Karina

Kyle and Lacey

Cheryl on a Box and Rick. 🙂

Mad props to Maks for this – LOL:

Kurt and Anna with George from the LA Affiliate

Bristol – much ado about nothing.

October 1, 2010 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS Season 11, Week 2 Media – Part II

It always strikes me as so funny how Len is so different with the paps as he is on the show. Hilarious. Len, Carrie Ann and several of the rest talk to Including Kym!! After Tony, there is a whole bunch of weirdness, the Maks makes an appearance towards the end.

ET from before Results

The Insider from Tuesday

Watch Derek veer into dangerous “I don’t mean to infer anything about your age” territory at the end of this video. Lots of good commentary about Michael too.

Michael and Chelsie

September 30, 2010 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS11, Week 2 – The Cheesecake Awards!

Here it is, hungry patrons…Heidi soldiered through and came up with some great stuff! And we have visual aids this week. 😉 LET THEM EAT CHEESECAKE!!!

The Costume Brain Fart Award – Tony Dovolani, with an assist from the folks at Randall for dittoing Melissa’s waltz dress from season 8 for Audrina’s quickstep this week; honorable mention for Jennifer’s jive dress, Maks’ jive outfit, and Bristol’s quickstep dress

Courtney: Not sure if it was a feeling of nostalgia or just a lack of creativity on the part of the pros or the costume department, but some of this week’s costumes felt awfully familiar…and probably the most familiar of those was Audrina’s quickstep dress, which was (nearly) identical to the dress Melissa wore for her waltz in season 8, save for a color change and a slightly different cut around the midsection. Jennifer’s jive dress almost seemed like a hybrid of the dress that both Chelsie wore for her salsa with Ty in season 8 (and Nicole wore her finale jive with Derek last season) and the fringe top & pants that Brooke wore for her salsa with Derek in season 7.  A little minor tweakage of the pattern from Kym’s dress from her Viennese waltz with Donny in season 9 gave us Bristol’s quickstep dress this week, and Maks fell back on the ol’ checkered highwater pants, suspenders, and a tie combo from his would-be jive with Misty in season 7 for his jive with Brandy this week.  Ahhh, memories…

Heidi: Derek said he designed Jennifer’s (and had to assure her that she had the body to wear it), so I know he was involved.  But there were so many similarities in costumes that I wonder if the pros are kinda at the point of saying – while running to teach the dance – Hey Randall, I want something like that time I danced with so and so only with this and this instead of that and that.  When you are more worried about your celeb getting the dance, how much time are you going to spend coming up with new designs every week??  In some cases, it works (Jennifer and Audrina) and in others? Not so much – Brandy and Maks (but more Maks than Brandy 🙂 ).  And that leads us to…

The WTF Was That? Costuming Choice Award, Male – Tony Dovolani for leather trimmed pants; honorable mention to Maks’ Checkered Highwater Pants and Suspenders

Heidi: Don’t get me wrong – I LOVED the color coordinated shirt with the long jacket with the leather (patent leather?) trim, but when you add that trim to the pants in not only a stripe but what appeared to be…shin guards?… and a wrap around thigh it was just much too much. I had to watch the dance a second time to get past it. 🙂  And Maks? Dude, you are much too old and much too burly for that outfit.  That outfit requires a slender model’s body and a more boyish look, IMO. Not that there’s anything wrong with burly – just put it in different clothes. 🙂

Courtney: Not sure exactly what look Tony was going for this week…going to do a piano concerto at a biker rally? Dressing up as a cross between Don Johnson on Miami Vice and “The Crow”? Or maybe trying rehash the Adam Lambert look (with a classy twist) from his tango with Kate last season? Whatever it was, I agree with you, Heidi – it was a bit much.  At least if he goes for a late-night jog in this outfit, the patent leather will reflect enough light to keep him safe from motorists 😉 As for Maks – I’m gonna go with the Al Borland from Home Improvement meets hip-hop manservant Fonzworth Bentley look.  Just not a fan of it on Maks…seems something better-suited to one of the goofier guys, like Mark or Louis. I prefer him doing jive in just black dance pants and his signature black tank – kinda like the one from the Hall & Oates performance a few seasons back.

The WTF Was That? Costuming Choice Award, Female – Lacey Schwimmer for that Quickstep dress

Heidi: This is one of those things that really makes me believe that Lacey thinks mainly of herself at all times. I mean, come on – could you even see Kyle behind that dress? That dress was ghastly at the best of times, but during a quickstep?? Aren’t you supposed to be able to see the feet? Or maybe THAT was her point – Kyle didn’t have footwork. But really, that dress seriously detracted from the dance – but I guess as long as YOU’RE happy, Lacey.

Courtney: The top reminds me of something a circus trapeze artist might wear, and the bottom is a cross between a tutu, a quincenera dress, and one of those cakes with a Barbie stuck in it where the icing is the skirt of her dress.  The overall result is, like Tony’s pants, just too much.  If the top had flowed into a more simple, streamlined skirt, I think I may have really liked it.  I can picture her running into the costume department and demanding “more ruffles! more ruffles!” Oh well – I guess if any of the ladies on the show had to wear it, Lacey would pull it off the best.

Heidi: Ummm…cake.

Awkward Brooke Burke Comment o’ the Week: Referring to Florence’s “beautiful age”

Heidi: Things that make you go whuuutt??  I think she started to say something else and something happened. Either she thought better of it, or the voices in her head…I mean, the producers were talking to her. 😉

Courtney: Oy…had to cringe at that one.  Tried to wrap my brain around how that one could possibly make sense…to no avail.  It’s like saying “musical elbow” or “conceited trumpet” – just an adjective and a noun that don’t really go together to me.  Poor Brooke – either she was trying to come up with something on the fly (and it didn’t really work), or someone was feeding her something in the earpiece and she just got it garbled.

Asshat o’ the Week Award: Bruno Tonioli

Courtney: If Bruno set out to make himself look like an inconsiderate, condescending, dance critique ignoramus, he sure passed with flying colors.  I almost feel like, in true flamboyant Bruno fashion, he set out to make a spectacle of each critique – even if it meant raking poor Michael across the coals, then rubbing salt in the wounds of his metaphorical 3rd-degree burns.  Did that jive suck? Yes.  Did he need make a hatchet job of his critique and humiliate Michael, who already seemed very humbled and embarassed by the experience? HELL NO.  What he did was not a genuine, constructive critique – it was an excercise in self-love and attention whoring.  And praise Len for calling him out on it – the man may be the known as the “grumpy old one” on the panel, but he has never been unecessarily cruel and has always managed to say something constructive about every routine, no matter how terrible.  And then when Bruno was given a golden opportunity to redeem himself & apologize on the results show, what did he do? He shit on it, and then proceeded to make an even bigger spectacle of himself by making haughty comments about moving to Fox.  Michael looked like he was mortified.  But props to him for staying classy and calm about it!

Heidi: What the fuck, Bruno. Damn. Michael couldn’t dance, true. But I’m pretty sure it’s NOT your job to humiliate people who come on the show to the point that others may consider not doing it, so they can avoid that same treatment. I’m also pretty sure that if *I* felt uncomfortable watching it, that much of the rest of the audience did as well. Simon Cowell you are NOT. For all of Maks’ ill advised or misplaced bitching about the judges, he got it right when he said in an interview that if you’re auditioning for a movie role or something, give it up. And that comment about Fox?? Dude, they’ve already cast the judges for American Idol AND I’m fairly sure the slots on X-Factor are filled as well. But even worse, was on results show night – you just compounded an already uncomfortable situation. God, I felt so sorry for Michael Bolton.

Most Ironic Pre-Show Ritual: Louis’ chocolate cake consumption

Heidi: “Hey, Cheryl and Lacey, you are too heavy. Now excuse me while I scarf down some chocolate cake…it’s different for us men. We have needs.” Gee, haven’t heard that one before. I challenge you to have an ab-off with Derek or Mark or Maks or Tony. Especially Derek – since he’s been hitting the gym every morning and that will benefit me as well. 🙂

Courtney: Funny to me that a man who has ridiculed both Cheryl & Lacey about their weight is the one that chows down on chocolate cake before every show.  Wonder why we have yet to see him with his shirt off…

Worst Fabricated Controversy: “Boo-gate”; (dis)honorable mention for Brandy & Maks’ perceived animosity

Courtney: Aaaaand cue the manufactured drama.  Although I think the blame for this one lies more with the fans than on those wiley producers…so many people were so quick to assume the booing was for Sarah Palin, rather than the more logical explanation that they were simply upset at Jennifer & Derek’s scores.  I mean, it seemed pretty obvious to me – the booing started immediately after the scores had been totaled.  Maybe it wasn’t as obvious to everyone else – whatever. Had it been anyone else Tom had been interviewing immediately afterward, I could almost guarantee there wouldn’t have been a “Boo-gate” (whoever came up with that moniker deserves an award…makes me giggle ;-)).  Never ceases to amaze me how people manage to manufacture drama where there is really none to be found.  And the whole “OMG Brandy & Maks hate each other!” mess? Puh-lease.  If anything, I think these two have had the best rapport of any of Maks’ partnerships…they can disagree without screaming at each other, and can joke about their mistakes.  They were buddy-buddy again 5 minutes after the alleged “blow-up”.

Heidi: Yeah, totally with you on Maks and Brandy. I think that was fan driven though, although Maks blames the producers. Wrong Maks, they didn’t edit the live show during the judges remarks – that was all you and Brandy. That said – what was the big deal? That is their relationship and it appears to work. As for the Boo-gate bullshit, my question is why DWTS worked so hard to show it wasn’t Sarah Palin getting booed. I mean, so what if she was (although everyone knew she wasn’t)? Who are they pandering to? Or are they just feeding off all the promotion-giving idiocy to get better ratings for the results show? Watching twitter after that was hilarious though – the left and right wings were killing themselves over it. The right were desperate for the booing to be for real so they could manufacture outrage at the left for booing her, thereby pumping up their base. The left assumed she was being booed because, well, most of them have booed her (myself included and with good reason). I say, “Oh boo-fricken-hoo – that audience doesn’t boo anyone but the judges but if they had booed Sarah – she’s heard worse, I’m sure. Politicians get booed, you big freakin’ babies.”

Courtney: Yah, it was a little odd how they chose to put so much effort into showing us that it wasn’t Sarah getting booed.  Regardless, I agree – it was hilarious watching the political mudslinging on Twitter.  Drama created for the sake of drama. Honestly I thought Sarah was pretty inoccuous when they were talking to her on the show – I just saw a proud mom supporting her daughter.  Too bad that everything had to get blown so far out of proportion…hopefully next week we’ll get enough “drama” from the storytelling on the dance floor that no one – producers, fans, or otherwise – will feel the need to manufacture any extra 🙂

Mr. Congeniality Award – The  Situation, for his show of good sportsman ship right before the elimination, and just being a lovable dork; honorable mention for Kyle’s lovable impishness

Heidi:I thought that was very sweet and gentlemanly of the Sitch to do that. The big Goober. 🙂 Kyle – I will buy you a cheeseburger, you little sweetie. I also have to add that I thought it was sweet how Jennifer and Margaret seemed to wrap themselves around Michael Bolton when they were all discussing the judge thing.

Courtney: The general consensus amongst everyone around here seems to be that our buddy The Situation is turning out to be far more likeable than anyone could’ve imagined.  He’s proving to actually be a pretty humble, goofy guy, who actually seems to be taking the competition seriously and wants to grow.  I found it very charming that he took the trouble to step over to Michael & Chelsie before the elimination to shake their hands – even if Karina seemed like she was freaking out about it (god forbid they not have the dramatic, obligatory side-by-side camera view of the two possible eliminees moments before the verdict!).  And Kyle is turning out to be this season’s happy, youthful rascal who can actually dance (and has fun doing it).  Both very pleasant surprises this season 😀

Most Unintentionally Hilarious Moment: Panning to the shocked faces of various pros and celebs after Michael got his scores

Courtney: Ok, I know it was done for dramatic effect, but I couldn’t help but chuckle when they showed a montage of the slack-jawed faces of the folks backstage when Michael got his scores.  Sweet that they were so concerned for his welfare, but out of context it looks like they had all seen a naked man or something.

Heidi: They needed to add little thought clouds over their heads with the words “NO you di’int just say that!!” in them.

Courtney: Let me fill in those thought bubbles for you 😉 The Situation: “Chill out, Freckles McGee! We about to have a Situation up in here!” Rick: “You’ve just awoken a sleeping giant.  Be warned!” Mark: “How dare thee chastise my beloved’s partner! I shall challenge you to a gentlemen’s duel after I comfort the lovely Chelsie with many kisses & rose petals and perhaps a weekend in Napa Valley!”

Heidi: Aaannndddd….Heidi throws up. Did you forget I’ve been sick? I didn’t need that visual – it was bad enough Mark ran straight to Chelsie and practically ripped her out of Michael’s arms after the eviction. Jaysus, boy. Who was making cracks about Derek being lovesick? Paging Marianya!!! 😉

Most Bizarre Pre-Show Ritual: Corky’s practice of getting intimate with the floor; honorable mention for Derek’s refridgerated double-sock ritual & Cheryl’s hand-sanitizer-in-lieu-of-deodorant ritual

Heidi: Derek, let me help you with those socks…not quite sure why they have to be cold, but whatever works for ya sweetie. 🙂 Cheryl does realize that the hand sanitizer is doing nothing for her in that particular location, right? That’s the point of rituals, right? It’s a mental thing. I actually think that Corky’s is (almost) the most logical – I mean, I could understand walking the floor in your bare feet, anyway. The sniffing seems more than a bit weird, though. 🙂

Courtney: Walking around the floor, I can understand.  Sniffing and kissing it? Ok, now we’re in fetish territory.  I almost think Corky made that one up just so he could stand out.  He probably really does something mundane, like doing the Reader’s Digest crossword puzzle or something.  Hand sanitizer in the armpits? Meh, the antibacterial properties would have a (short-lived) diminishing effect on any odor, but it sure as hell wouldn’t keep ya Soft ‘n’ Dry.  Refridgerated socks actually would sound divine after a long day of competing or a marathon session of dance lessons.  But the fact that there’s two layers of them seem like it would kinda counteract the cooling effect, and just make your feet hotter & sweatier in the long run.  Pedicure time!

Heidi: Derek also said at one time that he’s rather….he didn’t use the word manic, but we’ll go with that…about making sure the bottoms of his shoes are not slippery. That thing we saw him doing to Jennifer’s shoes (while she’s wearing them)? Was part of that little ritual. So I imagine the double socks is part of that, so his feet don’t slide in his shoes or whatever. Hey, I never claimed that my hot blond pretend boyfriend wasn’t a bit strange. Just sayin’. 🙂

The Award for the Most Limber Reality Show Host – Tom Bergeron

Heidi: We are now entering the Tom Bergeron portion of the program. 🙂 I have to wonder how many people it took to get him OUT of that position once he got himself into it. 🙂 “Tune in next week to see Tom’s Downward Facing Dog.”

Courtney: One word: Tom-a Sutra.  😉 Cue porno music.

Heidi: I was tempted to go there but resisted the urge. Thank you, oh equally evil twin. 😉

The Tom Bergeron Line ‘O the Night Award – “Len lecturing Bruno on how to be nice has to be a sign of the apocalypse.”

Heidi: Tom, I love ya, I do. But even you were having trouble finding the funny this week and I don’t blame you a bit. This line would have been hilarious any other time, and was a valiant effort at breaking the tension after what was a totally uncalled for series of remarks. But, awesome try, dude.

Courtney: I was squirming on the couch at home, so I can only imagine how terribly uncomfortable everyone in that ballroom had to be on performance night.  Carrie Ann looked like she might have a nervous breakdown.  Brooke looked totally confused (although that’s not really a new thing…); somebody probably had to rassle Len up a hot toddy during the commercial break.  God bless Tom for trying to do something – ANYTHING – to lighten the mood…even if the joke fell a bit flat.

The Most Awesome Production “Payback is a Bitch” Award – Whipping out Tony’s Leg Waxing Bet Video at Just the Right Time

Heidi: OMG, hilarious. Tony, word to the wise – buy your field producer cookies, the occasional beer, whatever, to avoid these problems in the future. 🙂 Either that, or don’t make bets on something so erratic and unpredictable as the judges on this show. I mean, really – the way these three wave their paddles you couldn’t even make a good drinking game out of it. Unless you chug every time they wave a SEVEN. 😀 Yes, dude, a seven. The best part was the reaction of all the other pros and celebs.

Courtney: This, like the footage of Maks’ jumping-up-and-down-like-a-toddler temper tantrum last season, is pure GOLD to the producers – probably not worth much to begin with, but when perfect time presents itself…priceless 😀 I have to wonder if the judges maybe had a bit of prior knowledge about this one…because it almost seemed TOO perfect that it went “Carrie Ann Inaba – 8, Len Goodman – 8, Bruno Tonioli – SEVEN!!!” Oh well – it was the one useful thing Bruno did on the show this week.  And Tony tweeted earlier today that the big day is Friday…so if we get any valuable twitpics, we just might have to post a “Leg-gate” update here 😉

Cutest Display of Enthusiasm: Jennifer moving in any way she could to make the fringe on her dress shake

Courtney: I think Heidi may have mentioned it in another post, but I too was like “Why is she moving so weird?” as she was coming down the stairs.  Then I realized “Awww…she’s shimmying the fringe on her dress!” It was just too adorable…as if she was so excited to be wearing fringe that she just couldn’t bear to let it go to waste. 🙂

Heidi: Yeah, that was me. I thought she was having a seizure – then I realized she was making her fringe move. She really has an inner 12 year old that presents itself at interesting times. It’s at times like that when you have to realize why Derek got Jennifer instead of Audrina, who many have mentioned as his “type”. Jennifer is he goober match. Love it. 🙂

September 29, 2010 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, baker, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble. Follow me (and my dog!) on Twitter & Instagram: @putuincespence & @BirkinTheBulldog

DWTS 9 Week 2 – The Last of the Media

Aaron and Karina have found a rather successful way to knock out the Donny publicity machine. I don’t know whether to be amused or disturbed. 🙂 I have to say that I agree with those who have been saying there are too many couples such that it’s hard to focus – and it’s just not exciting. I’m getting a tad bored. I mean, no ones even talking about dancing. They’re talking about injuries (Lacey, Debi and Tom’s), supposed romances – Aaron and Chelsie or Aaron and Karina?? Right. Showmance for publicity? Beats me. :::yawn:::

Anyway, first up is EXTRA on Debi’s and Tom’s injuries, and Carrie Ann Innaba’s predictions for the season.

I totally agree with Samantha’s face when asked about Jon Gosslin on DWTS. Are you KIDDING ME??? Is this what we’re talking about? Watch this video to see Derek’s reaction to a Jon Gosslin question – hilarious. His response is as it should be. The video below is from the Insider – Sam Cam makes an appearance. Melissa – glorifying bad behavior?? Do you know how many of your costars have arrest records?? Like, SEVEN. LOL. Like I said in a previous post – stop talking, your foot keeps going into your mouth. 🙂

Extra again – Kelly Osbourne was pretty upset after her last dance. Steve O as special correspondent.

Mark Dacascos and his wife talk to EXTRA:

Selena Gomez on DWTS, and Kathy gets the boot. Chelsie “rejects” Aaron Carter. Shawn Johnson is the Special Correspondent for E! News:

October 4, 2009 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)