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DWTS10 Week 5 Power Rankings

WOOHOO!!! I finally feel woken up from last week’s snoozefest.  Now had a lot of the couples channeled the many innuendos & saucy one-liners from this week into their dances last week, we might have actually had some passion.  But this week was fun, and finally we’re separating then men from the boys (and the women from the girls 😉 )…although I must say it’s actually getting harder to rank some of the couples because they’re so tightly packed in terms of progress…

1.)    Nicole & Derek – Nice to see these two bounce back after such a ho-hum performance last week.  I cringed inwardly when Heidi told me that they had gotten “Pretty Woman” as their tango – that song is not a tango.  But man, did they make it work – aside from Nicole having fantastic technique and a good connection with both Derek & the audience, I think they also did a really good job of striking a balance between portraying the movie & doing the dance (which, unfortunately, is a balance some of the other couples did not achieve).  And compared to Evan & Anna, I feel like this performance had more of a “pulse” – Evan, while quite good technically, is still feeling a little disconnected to me.  I think people will rally around them this week, and going in the second half of the show did seem to help with being memorable.  And they were a mere point away from a perfect score – *sigh* oh Len.  I’m fairly certain these two will get the encore this week (if there is one – it sounds like a pretty packed results show) and will sail easily into next week 😉 

2.)    Evan & Anna – First off, I gotta give Heidi props for calling this song choice – she had it pegged, while I was still holding out for Berlin’s “Take My Breath Away”.  Oh well – maybe next season.  Ok, now admittedly, I missed about the first 20 seconds of this rumba because my DVR froze (conveniently, on Evan’s hindquarters…hehe), so yes, I realize I didn’t see the whole thing.  What I saw though was pretty good – Evan definitely seems to nail the sweeping arm motions of the man, while still being there to support Anna.  But I’m still feeling like he’s not 100% “in” the dance – like there’s a small part of him that’s so focused on what he’s doing that he loses some of the emotion of it.  I also think he plays better to an audience (probably due to his skating background) than he does to his partner – but Anna, while I adore her, is admittedly a bit cold.  So I guess we’ll see as the weeks play out – at least they got the two most passionate dances (rumba & tango) out of the way early.  These two aren’t going anywhere (and I won’t even say the “R” word this time – but I’ll give you a hint: it rhymes with zinger), but I think Derek & Nicole might get a bit more press than Evan & Anna this week.

 3.)    Pam & Damian – I agonized over whether or not these two deserved 3rd or 4th place, but I ultimately chose them over Erin & Maks because I think the latter are starting to overdose the media with their “showmance” and interest in that will likely wane a bit.  But anyway – VIVA LA PAM!!! She’s surprisingly light on her feet. I thought this was an adorable dance, and it seemed oddly apropos to have Pam channeling Dolly Parton 😉 I’m really starting to appreciate Damian’s choreography too – it’s simple & “meaty” enough to satisfy Len, but also lends itself nicely to some fun, memorable moments. I also snickered a bit when they did Jake & Chelsie’s “up the stairs & down the stairs” move from last week on the table & chairs – and they did it better 😉 I’m hoping that more people are starting to hop onto the Viva La Pam bandwagon, especially those who are starting to tire of Krabby Kate and want to throw their votes behind another mommy.  I know that all the votes in my house went to them! I’ve got a feeling that Pam is getting safer & safer with each passing week, as the “dark horse” in her starts to emerge – she could be this year’s Kelly.

 4.)    Erin & Maks – Ok, really? An entire package of these two fake screaming at each other in a sort of warped flirtation? I just don’t find it cute anymore – I find it kind of annoying, actually.  I’d rather see Erin just LISTEN to Maks (gahhh, can’t believe I’m saying that) and hopefully strengthen her skills.  This jive…was alright.  Erin is still doing something wonky with her arms, and I just couldn’t help thinking about Apolo & Julianne’s jive to this same song in season 4 and how much better I liked it.  Kinda surprised that the “powers that be” decided to reuse this song, really.  And maybe this is a petty gripe on my part – but why the hell did they have Erin in a blonde wig??? MIA WALLACE HAD BLACK HAIR!!! And I like my Vincent Vega’s to have ponytails! The Tarantino fan in me is just crying inwardly right now.  These two ought to be ok, based on their coy banter during their interview with Brooke – but I recommend they find a new gimmick, and FAST, because this whole “are we or aren’t we?” act is wearing thin, and I’m not sure that Erin can measure up to Evan, Nicole, and maybe even Pam.

 5.)    Jake & Chelsie – Ok, another movie-related gripe: where were Jake’s sunglasses? Tom Cruise wore sunglasses when he was strutting around in his skivvies.  I know some of you will argue “Well he couldn’t dance with them on!” – so take them off and toss them in the audience, dude! Now while I didn’t want to like this – I did.  I’m not sure whether it’s Chelsie’s skill or Jake’s enthusiasm that’s making them so fun to watch, but whatever they’re doing seems to be working.  But Jake does have a problem: he gets so excited and into the dance that he fouls up.  He’s kinda like a puppy that isn’t quite housebroken yet: really energetic & trying his best, but gets excited and pees on the rug.  And as we weed out some of the weaker dancers, it just makes Jake’s voting fanbase seem that much smaller – he’s gonna have to bust out a great routine next week, or he may run the risk of falling into the dreaded “middle of the pack” – not getting sympathy votes like the low-scorers, and not getting the volume of votes like the high-scorers.

 6.)    Chad & Cheryl – Another showmance I’m just getting sick of hearing about.  Seriously, at this point, I do not care whether they’re doing the horizontal mambo or not.  It’s just getting old.  And with as weak a dancer as Chad is – they, like Erin & Maks, need to find a new strength to aid them in this competition.  Now while his quickstep was miles better than his foxtrot, he just holds his body so awkwardly, especially his head (I still blame the height difference between these two).  Going 2nd didn’t seem to help their cause much, either.  Oy…still such a disappointment, these two.  I’m actually gonna say that either Chad or Kate could end up in the danger zone this week – it’s kinda hard to tell. Either way, I don’t see him sticking around for more than 2 weeks.

 7.)    Kate & Tony – Ok, I’m actually going to give Kate ONE compliment this week: she managed to throw in the occasional (weak) smile while dancing.  But I about put my foot through my flat screen when she was questioning Tony’s choreo at the beginning of the package – never, EVER question a pro’s choreography. PERIOD.  No matter how dorky or silly it may seem (unless you’re Mya and Dmitry is choreographing a crap freestyle for you) – you do it and you trust your pro.  Now from some of the chatter on Twitter and the DWTS message boards, it seems like the “Keep Kate” campaign that idiot George Lopez is spearheading might not be so successful this week – sounds like a lot of “trainwreck” fans are now abandoning ship because they’re sick of her.  I’m hoping they gravitate towards Pam 😉 , but as long as they’re NOT throwing extra votes Kate’s way (and are instead throwing those votes to another couple), I’m ok with it.  I daresay that infernal Lopez and his campaigning will prolly have enough juice to keep her around this week, but next week – she’s kaput.

 8.)    Niecy & Louis – I’m afraid these two just fell victim to bad running order and bad song choice this week.  Granted, Niecy’s jive wasn’t particularly energetic or hard-hitting, but it was fun, and those two are fun to watch together.  I’m just afraid it’s not going to be enough to carry them through.  In their defense though – La Bamba? C’mon now – the movie wasn’t all that memorable.  Lou Diamond Phillips channeling Richie Valens? It was an ok (but forgettable) flick – which is why I don’t think this song did them any favors.  It’s been a nice run, Niecy, but I’m afraid your jiggly parts just aren’t enough to keep you around any longer.

 And so begins the debating! Who do you guys see coming out on top and who do you see getting kicked to the curb? Still got votes left? Throw them to ANYONE but Kate 😉 And you guys better brace yourself for this week’s Cheesecake Awards – I have a feeling they’re gonna be a doozy! 😀 I’m off to pick up the bf at the airport…he better have brought me back something fun from Vegas!

April 19, 2010 I Written By

Ultrasound sales specialist by day, semi-knowledgeable DWTS fan by night...with a smattering of hair & makeup enthusiast, occasional model, baker, and crazy cat lady peppered in to make things REALLY interesting ;-) I might pee my pants in happiness if Donnie Wahlberg ever does DWTS - or if they ever use "Sunglasses at Night" as a paso doble.

DWTS 10 Week 5 Predictions

Hola! Konnichiwa! Bonjour! Alo! I’m Marianya the newest blogger on the site. I’ve been a fan and following DWTS since Season 2. I have done some ballroom dancing myself and totally recommend it as a recreational activity for those that are fans of DWTS and would like to know how to dance… even just for fun!

In any case, Princess Heidi did an awesome write up that includes which dance each celeb/pro is doing, possible song choices, commentary, etc. What I’m attempting to do is take past scores and experiences of the pros (and in some cases past celebs that relate to a current celeb) and will attempt to predict what their scores are going to be tonight. I did not use scores from relays, or team dances. I also did not use scores of the Argentine Tango since it is a different dance from the Tango.

And now, in no particular order…

Evan Lysacek/Anna Trebunskya – Rumba
– Season 2 (w/ Jerry Rice, Week 7): 21/30
Since there is not enough information, I’m going to add include the scores of previous figure skaters:
– Season 6 (Kristi Yamaguchi/Mark Ballas, Week 5): 29/30
Prediction: 26/30

Jake Pavelka/Chelsie Hightower – ChaCha
– Season 8 (w/ Ty Murray, Week 1): 14/30
Since Chelsie has only done the ChaCha with Ty Murray, I’m going to pull data from previous reality stars.
– Season 8 (Holly Madison/Dmitry Chaplin, Week 1): 18/30
– Season 8 (Melissa Rycroft/Tony Dovolani, Week 10): 27/30
Prediction: 21/30

Chad Ochocinco/Cheryl Burke – Quickstep
– Season 2 (w/ Drew Lachey, Week 2): 27/30
– Season 3 (w/ Emmitt Smith, Week 2): 24/30
– Season 4 (w/ Ian Ziering, Week 2): 22/30
– Season 5 (w/ Wayne Newton, Week 2): 15/30
– Season 6 (w/ Cristian de la Fuente, Week 2): 20/30
– Season 7 (w/ Maurice Greene, Week 8): 24/30
– Season 8 (w/ Gilles Marini, Week 2): 27/30
Prediction: 22/30

Niecy Nash/Louis Van Amstel – Jive
– Season 2 (w/ Lisa Rinna, Week 3): 25/30
– Season 3 (w/ Monique Coleman, Week 3): 27/30
– Season 9 (w/ Kelly Osbourne, Week 8): 26/30
Prediction: 24/30

Kate Gosselin/Tony Dovolani – Foxtrot
– Season 2 (w/ Stacy Keibler, Week 4): 26/30
– Season 3 (w/ Sara Evans, Week 1): 15/30
– Season 4 (w/ Leeza Gibbons, Week 1): 15/30
– Season 5 (w/ Jane Seymour, Week 1): 24/30
– Season 6 (w/ Marissa Jaret Winokur, Week 8): 25/30
– Season 8 (w/ Melissa Rycroft, Week 3): 27/30
Prediction: 17/30

Nicole Sherzinger/Derek Hough – Tango
– Season 5 (w/ Jennie Garth, Week 3): 26/30
– Season 6 (w/ Shannon Elizabeth, Week 7): 27/30
– Season 7 (w/ Brooke Burke, Week 8): 28/30
Prediction: 26/30

Erin Andrews/Maksim Chmerkovskiy – Jive
– Season 3 (w/ Willa Ford, Week 3): 22/30
– Season 4 (w/ Laila Ali, Week 8): 26/30
– Season 5 (w/ Mel B, Week 3): 27/30
Prediction: 22/30

Pamela Anderson/Damian Whitewood – Quickstep
– Season 1 (Kelly Monaco/Alec Mazo, Dance Off): 24/30
– Season 8 (Holly Madison/Dmitry Chaplin, Week 2): 18/30
I’m comparing with the only data that would be relevant, which is via the celeb… Since this is later in the season, and Pamela is slowly doing better… and can act…
Prediction: 22/30

So those are my predictions for the night… What are your predictions? 😀

Data Disclaimer: This was the best data I could find. Feel free to correct anything I might have gotten wrong so I can update the post.

I Written By

My life can be summed up in the following two quotes: 1) "I am married to engineering and am its faithful wife by day, but at night my wanderlust takes hold and the arts becomes my jealous paramour." and... 2) "Engineering is my safety net. Writing is my passion. Acting is my escape when the other two become too much." So where does dancing fit in? Pretty much anywhere at this point... =)

Dancing with the Stars, Week 4 – Media Part IV

Still in the relatively Kate-free zone.

This video from Entertainment Tonight (4-16-10) is where I got much of my song information. You can tell that The Insider and ET are owned by the same people, what with all the Niecy pimping. At least she’s entertaining. 🙂

Extra from 4-13; Pam, Chad/Cheryl, Nicole, Jake/Chelsie, Bruno – Quiz time for Nicole and Cheryl

Extra from 4-14; stuff from the results show and post-results show. Vienna, Jake’s fiance, is a correspondent – and she doesn’t do too bad, compared to some who’ve tried in the past. Plus a little bit from the after party – my biggest question is; what is Cheryl Burke doing with Adam Shankman?? Inquiring minds…

Extra from 4-17; Jake and Chelsie and Risky Business. Jake is actually looking pretty decent in his rehearsal. There is some Kate in the middle of this one. George Lopez on Keep Kate. ::groan::

April 18, 2010 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS Season 10, Week 4 – Media Part III

Sorry to Kate fans, but I’m having a Kate-free media zone. She has completely taken over my television and she’s the worst dancer; I’m not encouraging it, so the only way you’ll see her is if she’s in a video with other people I find interesting. Like…everyone else. 🙂

Maks and Erin on Ellen. Mixed messages, anyone? 🙂

Access Hollywood – Erin responding to the Toronto Star (why? why respond to that crap??). Nicole and Derek on Chad and Cheryl. Jake and Chelsie. Derek gets bad ass -or tries. Difficult when you have a baby face. 🙂

Entertainment Tonight from 4-13; all about the results show. Little bits from Niecy, Erin, Kate and Nicole. Gambling odds – Nicole in first but barely. Evan is almost even with her. However, they got the bottom wrong.

Entertainment Tonight from 4-15; a day in the life of Evan Lysacek. Finally, one of the top dancers gets some press; ya can’t say he’s flying under the radar any longer. Now if only Nicole could get some press on the level of the lesser dancers. Or Pam, for that matter. I’m sick of kate kate kate.

I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS Season 10 – Who’s Dancing What…and Other Stuff

This is shaping up to be an interesting week on Dancing with the Stars! First off, we get an all male pro dance during the results show – Derek, Damian, Dmitry and Tony. I feel warm already. 🙂 The guys are dancing to Debi Nova. From a reprinting of the ABC Press Release by J! Ent:

Also this week, Platinum-selling soul star Maxwell will perform his chart-topping single “Fistful of Tears” on Tuesday. The singer/songwriter recently scored a three-peat with “Fistful of Tears,” his third consecutive No. 1 on Billboard’s Urban Adult airplay charts, making him the first male artist to achieve this feat. Grammy Award winner superstars Maxwell and Jill Scott will kick off their U.S. arena tour on May 21 in Cleveland. Maxwell is catapulting off his two recent Grammy Awards and his No. 1, platinum “BLACKsummers’night” (Columbia), which dominated year-end critics lists. Last fall, Maxwell entered the history books at Billboard when “Pretty Wings” and “Bad Habits,” the first two singles from “BLACKsummers’night,” monopolized the top two slots on the Adult R&B radio airplay chart.

Costa Rican singing sensation, Debi Nova, will perform her newest single “Drummer Boy,” while pros Derek Hough, Damian Whitewood, Tony Dovolani and Dmitry Chaplin accompany her on the dance floor. Her first single was co-written by Nova and produced by Marius de Vries and Dreamlab. Nova is set to release her Spanish/English, hybrid debut album, “Luna Nueva,” on Decca/Surco Records this May. Nova has amassed an impressive body of work including six Grammy-nominated projects, a No. 1 single, collaborations with the likes of Black Eyed Peas and Ricky Martin, and touring the world. She has been writing and performing professionally since the age of 14 and signed her first songwriter deal at the age of 17, subsequently penning songs for Latin recording artists Belinda and RBD, Sean Paul, Mark Ronson and her own single, “One Rhythm,” which reached No. 1 in Latin America and on the U.S. dance charts. The forthcoming “Luna Nueva,” co-produced by Surco Records founder Gustavo Santaoalla (two-time Oscar winner, multiple Grammy and Latin Grammy winner, Juanes, CafŽ Tacvba) and Marius de Vries (five-time Grammy Award nominee, two-time BAFTA winner, Madonna, Josh Groban), is an irresistible hybrid of Latin rhythms and straight-ahead pop.

The Macy’s Stars of Dance is featuring an appearance by Debbie Allen, but none of our Pros are listed, so it’s either all or none. 🙂

Now, in terms of the performance show, below is what I have for each couple, including the movie if I know it. I’ve been watching (and participating in) a lot of debate on Twitter – is it any song from a given movie? Is the movie given to them, but not necessarily the title song – if there is a title song?? For example, Derek and Nicole’s movie is Pretty Woman. I made the assumption based on what Tom said that it’s a movie song, not a theme night, so therefore, Derek and Nicole are dancing to “Pretty Woman”, not another song from the movie, such as Wild Women Do (which would, apparently, make a much better tango). So, I will list what I know, below, and you guys tell me if it’s the title song or some other song.

Pam/Damian – Quickstep – This doesn’t bode well for Pam, I don’t think. I will be very happy to be wrong. But a quickstep doesn’t have the passion of a Tango or a Rumba, and doesn’t have the jiggle factor of a Cha Cha. I guess we’ll see. I’ll be happy to be surprised once again.

Kate/Tony – Fox Trot – Again, possible disaster, but it probably won’t matter. Kate says they are dancing to a song from an 80’s movie, a movie she is familiar with. Since the Press Release mentions Breakfast Club, that’s what I’m betting on for Kate. Which song from this movie is the “iconic song”? Don’t You Forget About Me, by Simple Minds? If they are doing a Fox Trot, it’s can’t be We Are Not Alone, can it?

Evan/Anna – Rumba – I think Evan will dance it very well, for sure. But will he have a connection problem with Anna? This dance really requires it, and the best dancer on the show (Nicole) can’t call this her very best dance. Entertainment Tonight (or similar show) said that they are dancing to a romantic song from an action movie. Any ideas out there? 🙂 Something from Independence Day? I have a song right on the tip of my brain but I can’t come up with it. I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing by Aerosmith – from the movie Armageddon??

Jake/Chelsie – Cha Cha – A Cha Cha to Risky Business, no less. At least, that’s what I got from one of the entertainment shows from which I will be posting video later. Please, god, no tighty whities. Please? At this point, I wouldn’t count Jake out, although I think he’s on the bubble. Will he be able to handle the cha cha? No idea. If he does do the Tom Cruise iconic look from this movie, I can guarantee a low score from Len.

Chad/Cheryl – Quickstep – I don’t believe I’ve heard what song they are dancing to, but I smell trouble for Chad. Cheryl tweets that he’s doing well, but really? A quickstep? Again, I would be happy to be wrong.

Niecy/Louis – Jive – Dancing to La Bamba. A Jive to La Bamba? Geez, I dunno. That song doesn’t seem quite right, seems a little slow. So, title song, or another song from the movie. Watching Niecy and Louis on the entertainment shows, I’m saying title song.

Erin/Maks – Jive – to Pulp Fiction?  I’m worried about this one. That scene from Pulp Fiction was “iconic” for sure, but for a Jive? It sounds awkward. I hope I’m wrong.  Okay, after watching the scene from the movie which is, IMO, “iconic” – maybe Maks and Erin don’t have it so bad. I can see a Jive to this song.

Nicole/Derek – Tango – to Pretty Woman. I’m on the title song bandwagon, but hoping like hell I’m wrong. Wild Women Do would be much better, I think. Plus, a little bird tells me that is the song played when Julia is shopping on Rodeo Drive. And where are Derek and Nicole doing an out of studio package bit?? Rodeo Drive. I guess we’ll see.

Of what we know so far, I think Derek and Louis are going to have to work choreographic magic to get appropriate dances from that music. Either that or play with the music, which Maks indicated that he was doing. Anyway, my pre-dance prediction is that Kate is safe yet again and either Niecy or Jake are in deep doo doo. I reserve the right to change my mind once we see the dances.

A note to the Kate Haters: You have to VOTE for another couple (or all the other couples) if you really want Kate to go home. I don’t hate Kate, actually, but what I do hate is better dancers leaving before her. Up to now it hasn’t pissed me off. But if she stays again on Tuesday, it WILL piss me off. Because for her to stay, it means a MUCH better dancer will have to leave, instead of only a slightly better dancer. It means that Jake, or Niecy, or Chad, or Erin, or Nicole, or Pam will go home instead of her. Not Evan, of course, because he’s the ringer to beat. 🙂 But all the rest of them are in danger, some more than others.

April 17, 2010 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS Season 10, Week 4 – Media Part III

A whole bunch of videos (as usual) from the Local ABC Affiliate. I’ve put a selection below; visit the site to see all of them.

Tom Bergeron – my latest crush – I love this man. Yeah, he’s talking about Kate, but I still love him. 🙂

The Musicians from Nuttin’ but Strings

Evan and Anna – yes, we know you want people to vote for you. 🙂

Pam and Damian Post Results show

Erin and Maks – veeerrrrryyyy interesting

April 15, 2010 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

Dancing with the Stars Season 10, Week 4 – Results Show Video

I don’t know why I forget this stuff every week…to many other things going on I guess. 🙂

The encore by Pam and Damian – I’m really loving this couple. Surprise, surprise, I am on the Vive la Pam train. 🙂 I would have to say they’re my second favorite.

Sade – Baby Father. Danced by Chelsie and Damian.

The Pros, pre-DWTS. Hilarious.

The Young Ballroom Dancers

Sade – The Sweetest Taboo

The Elimination

I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS 10, Week 4 – Media Part II

The Insider from Monday Night:

Entertainment Tonight from Monday Night:

TV Guide with Derek and Nicole – Derek makes a lot of pretty insightful comments about DWTS. All the way to the end of the video.

Aiden and Edyta – post results show

Niecy and Louis – this is just a weird interview all the way around. 🙂

I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS 10, Week 4 – The Cheesecake Awards!!!

This week, it was nearly all the performance show. And there were almost too many things to comment on. 🙂

Funniest Tom One-liner –“ Welcome to the fabric remnant showroom” (paraphrasing)
Heidi: Don’t drink red wine when you have light colored furniture.
Courtney: …lest it become one of Edyta’s costumes. Unless you’re Chad & Cheryl, in which case your costumes are made from the pantyhose I used to wear when I was a Hooters girl.

Most Stupid-assed, Cheesy Opening Segment – Buzz is blasted off from about mid-thigh up, out of the picture.
Heidi: Are you f@*king kidding me? Not only was that one of the cheesiest, stupidest things I’ve seen on this show, it’s also freakin’ disrespectful. The man is 80, and a damn astronaut. You people are pissing me off.
Courtney: If this is going to be a recurring theme during the intro, what the hell are they gonna do with the other celebs eliminated? Evan triple-lutzing out of the frame? Pam running away in slow-mo? If they’re gonna offend, they may as well be equal-opportunity offenders.

Most Snicker-worthy Production Screwup – Yeah, that double scoring scoreboard didn’t work so well on the first dance – it previewed the first dancer’s second score long before the judges had a chance to whip out their paddles. Took them a couple dances to fix it too. 🙂
Heidi: Is it mean that I always laugh when they mess that stuff up?
Courtney: Not at all – if they’re going to do something as dumb as doing 2 scores, then they may as well mess it up while they’re at it. They must have really been having issues when Evan was getting his scores, because they didn’t even use that silly chart.

Most likely to moonlight as a Victoria’s Secret model – Nicole Scherzinger, Kym Johnson, & Edyta Sliwinska. (3-way tie)
Heidi: So, Nicole’s walking down the stairs with Derek and I thought that perhaps she had bought new boobs since the last show. Then I remember the miracle bra – mainly because I saw Kym Johnson wearing that and nearly nothing else, right after pondering Nicole’s situation(s).
Courtney: If I had a body half as good as these three, I would seriously go naked all day long. Maybe throw on some negligee to go to the grocery store or something. But I did notice that Nicole’s “ladies” were looking extra perky, and then noted how big of a difference there was in Edyta’s cleavage between the lead-in package to their actual performance. God bless the Miracle Bra!

Most Ridiculous Studio Decoration – The “HOT HOT HOT!!” flashing neon sign
Heidi: It’s a bad sign that when you have to hang a sign that states what you’re hoping the dances will convey on their own. What, were they afraid we wouldn’t get it?? Oh, wait…
Courtney: There are only 3 places in this world where neon flashing signage is actually effective: cheap casinos, bail bonds offices, and strip clubs. Last I checked, DWTS was not any of those 3 establishments. Well…2 out of 3…not gonna lie, I have had the urge to “tuck a buck” from time to time while watching the show 😉

The “Heidi is Sick of Gimmicks” Cheese Award – the sob story for votes.
Heidi: Broken toes. Traveling while training. Dead relatives. Hurt back. Whaa whaa whaa – Evan double dips as two of those are his. Dude, spamming for votes AND two sob stories? No, he wasn’t really whining, but I’m with Erin – my favorites are those who get hurt and you never see any evidence of it on camera. Mark Ballas, for example, tore the hell out of his knee and danced on it without broadcasting it before the results show. Derek did the same thing two seasons in a row – and was photographed wearing a heating pad on his shoulder last week. While they were pimping the hell out of Melissa Rycroft’s ribs, Lil’ Kim had the exact same injury and we didn’t hear about it.
Courtney: If they’re in that much pain, I say they just start downing Vicodin a la Dr. House and then, after DWTS, they can do Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew. It’s a two-fer! Totally, totally kidding. If you’re gonna whine repeatedly, you may as well just withdraw.

Best unintentional innuendo – Derek Hough, “This is my Love Hand.”
Heidi: :::spew::: Thank you, Baby Jesus. Dude. Right handed, eh? Visualizing, I’m visualing…I’m a bad girl. Even funnier was him realizing what he said, about 5 seconds too late. 😉
Courtney: While he is indeed yummy, I don’t really wanna think about where that hand has been, hehe. I’d rather see Tony Dovolani’s “Hate Hand”, whereby he sticks a certain finger in Kate’s face after he’s just had enough of her nagging, complaining, and crying.

Most Egregious Vote Whore – Evan Lysacek.  (Dis)honorable Mention – Pam Anderson.
Heidi: Bad, bad Evan. It really sucks when the Olympian shoe-in is the worst about pimping himself for votes. I can at least understand Pam, since she actually hit the bottom two a couple weeks back.
Courtney: Evan is just kinda altogether annoying me right now, between the vote whoring and the whining about the toes. I’m gonna give Pam the “get out of jail free” card for the week, since she is prolly still reeling from being in the bottom 2 the first week. Plus I have a heterosexual woman-crush on her. Viva la Pam!

Best Use of a Prop We Never Thought We’d See Again – Jeff Ross’ rhinestone eye patch, worn by Aiden in the “Double O-Chocinco” fake trailer.
Courtney: Seriously, wardrobe must have peed their pants with excitement when they got to pull this out of storage. And the fact that it was worn by one of Edyta’s former partners (who happened to scratch his cornea) before being worn by Aiden (who got elbowed in the eye by Edyta during their foxtrot) is just an eerie coincidence…or is it? 😉
Heidi: (tangent) Derek and his love hand and an eye patch………visualizing, I’m visualizing…..

Most Ironic Song Choice – “Wait a Minute” by the Pussycat Dolls for Evan’s tango
Courtney: You happen to choose a song by the group that your biggest competition on the show was the lead singer of…coincidence, or strategy?
Heidi: Or producers who are sick f@#ks. I pick door number 2, Monty. Seriously, they aren’t having much opportunity to pick their own songs this year. See, Nicole’s Jive, and her upcoming Tango (to Pretty Woman?? Fer REAL???)

Most Unexpected Chemistry – Chelsie and Damian during their dance to Sade
Courtney: I was very pleasantly surprised by Damian especially this week, after complaining about “knowing nothing about him” after last week’s show. He had a great rumba with Pam, and then a lovely, dramatic performance with Chelsie. Forget about rumors of Chelsie and Mark dating and Chelsie and Derek dating – I wouldn’t mind seeing Chelsie and Damian together!
Heidi: Who’s Damian?? You mean there is a guy dancing with Pam? You don’t say!! 🙂 Fer a straight girl, I have a very hard time looking away from Pam. Seriously, finally we get a glimpse at Damian – he’s been a shadow up to now.

Tackiest “Love Props” – the heart pillows in the Celebraquarium, with (dis)honorable mentions for the feathers on the stage for Chad and Cheryl’s rumba and the grapes that Erin was dangling in the guys’ faces
Courtney: Those damn pillows reminded me of this tacky no-tell motel on the edge of town that has heart-shaped vibrating beds with satin sheets. And the fact that the celebs and pros alike were tossing them around ALL NIGHT LONG was just obnoxious. As was Erin dangling grapes in Maks and Jake’s faces (although I give her props for throwing one at Evan, hehe) and Chad and Cheryl collapsing into a big pile of goose down in the middle of the stage, which served no choreographic purpose other than to look romantic. We GET it, guys: it’s rumba and tango night. But do you really need pillows, feathers, and grapes to convey that???
Heidi: Of course they don’t need all that stuff, if it were just THEM. But us real stoopid people who sit at home with our hands in the front of our pants, belching might have missed all the passion floating around. That said, I too give Erin points for throwing a grape at Evan’s head. I also applaud anyone throwing a pillow at anyone else’s head as a way of saying, “Shut the f*&K up.” 🙂

April 14, 2010 I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)

DWTS Season 10, Week 4 Results Show – The Commercials

I could have put these commercials in the Cheesecake Awards, but I actually thought they were kinda funny. Evan, don’t quit your day job. Hell, that goes for the rest of you too. 🙂

Double OchoCinco!

Glambo! LOL!!!

ChaChablanca

Tuesday the 13th!!

I Written By

I'm a nerd and proud of it. Two degrees in geology also means I love BEER. :-) I'm also a Derek lover - proud of that too. So don't scream at those of us on this site and call us a bunch of "biased Derek-lovers" - it's just ME. :-) It may sound like I hate DWTS at times, but really, I'm just a snarky nitpicker from way back. And I'm cynical and jaded too. But I do love DWTS. :-)