Dancing with the Stars Season 28, Week FIVE – LIVE BLOG

What do I expect to see tonight?? A bunch of contemporary and jazz dances that are called by another name…like quickstep, samba, V.waltz and foxtrot…and possibly even Paso, although his song actually is a closer fit that many of the others.

What else do I expect to see? A decent dancer sent home instead of the person who should be going home.

T-minus 30 minutes to show time.

Great opening – love how they featured Pasha and Daniella. 🙂  Male pros had the best bit. Loved that…best opening in quite some time.

Sailor up first with Cinderella – nailed that one.  All your expected Disneyification in the packages.

Took a really long time to move across the floor. But  she seems to be doing quite well. Very princess-y VW.

Len: Light and fluffy like a soufle – would have liked more in hold. Makes a comment about her def back next week.

Bruno: Belle of the ball, acting it very well. Great job. Balance is starting to be on the axis.

CAI: Got emotional because you were in character. Magic of Disney. Amazing dance.

Scores: 8, 8, 8 for 24 out of 30.  I expect to see lots of 8s tonight, although I think she earned them. But now, the good dancers will start leaving because your president it tweeting support of someone instead of focusing on a million more important things.

Karamo up next with a Samba to Lion King.  Awww…a single dad.

So far so good.  Decent hips. He’s bending kinda far over. He has a gorgeous smile. It got even better the farther in he got to the dance. I thought that was pretty good!! Should be 7s again. If not, they’re screwing him. He’s emotional. 🙂

Bruno: Let me hear you roar! Really attacked like a leader. Fell back a bit when in hold with Jenna. Great performance.

CAI: You radiate joy. Agree with Bruno. Use each others energy a bit more.

Len: Fun and joyful. Unfortunately your feet are your problem, went wrong on the running promenades. (Agree he had feet issues but Len always makes it sound worse than it actually is).

Score: 7, 7, 7 for a total of 21 out of 30.

Numbers Update: About 15k votes per million votes cast between Karamo and Sailor…not very much.

Kate up next with Mary Poppins…I’m killing it so far with the song guesses. 🙂 Jazz….Kate also has a bit of training in college. Not a big deal. Most women do. It is what it is.

Pasha is choreographing a quickstep to this in the opening bars. Gets much more jazzy in the middle. A whole lot of carrying Kate.  that was a fun dance but an example of why I don’t like Disney week very much. A lot of not-dancing, but performance.

CAI: Kate is back! Started with Quickstep. Such a powerful couple. What the actual hell is going on right now???

Len: There was a nice section of polka, quickstep, charleston all wrapped up in a sweet and delicious routine.

Bruno: The medicine worked wonders. Olden days musical feel. Own personal take on Mary Poppins.

Scores: 8, 8, 8 for a total of 24 – I would agree with that.

Lindsay up next and I’m batting a thousand on the songs so far.  🙂 He’s off time right from the start. They’ve got to stop using the  stairs. Other wise, slowest quickstep in history and totally off time. Lindsay does a good job of getting some stuff in there that he can nail.

Len: You’ve got a friend in me. I watched carefully. Nice heel leads. Frame pretty good. Stuff in hold. Don’t get over excited – it was a proper dance, well done. (crack is wack).

Bruno: It was better. She was talking you through it. Credit to someone who tries very hard. It was better.

CAI: That was your best dance.

What the actual fuck are these judges smoking?? If he does better than 5s….well, the judges are afraid of death threats.

Scores: 7, 6, 6 for a total of 19 out of 30.

Seriously, CAI, giving this dude the same score as Karamo?? What the actual fuck.

Numbers Update: Only about 10k votes per million between SS and Karamo. And about 25k between SS and Kate/Sailor.

Ally up next with contemporary to Beauty and the Beast. Ally is so pretty. And she’s doing very well with this dance. Good choreography from Sasha and well executed.

Bruno: Thank you, 1.5 minutes of pure happiness. Fearless commitment.

CAI: Think you had training but you don’t. Lines aren’t from that. You still go 100%, authentic to you. Fantastic.

Len: Smooth like butter on a hot muffin, gliding across the floor. Lifts in keeping with routine. There was emotion running through that. Cracking routine.

Scores: 9, 9, 9 for a total of 27.  I agree with that. That was a pretty dance.

Numbers Update: Well Ally should be safe with that score. As of right now, there are about 40k votes per million between her and S___.  Karamo, on the other hand is in danger.

Daniella up next as Elsa.  She is so freakin’ amazing. The camera work on this dance is extra shitty. Feature Daniella – a world class dancer – and you can’t even light it, block it or stage it so that she is actually featured. Jesus, DWTS.

Lauren up next with a samba to Little Mermaid. That wig is gawdawful. I like the jelly fish. I’m not liking the staging of this one so far. the choreography is doing her no favors. She looked a bit lost towards the end. Not sure what was going on with her face.

CAI: Hardest dance to get because the bounce is hard. Fantastic bounce. Weird arms once in a while. Still growing, it was wonderful.

Len: Lots of Samba content amongst the messing about. Went wrong in the running promenades. Little bit too much going on. Nice dancer though.

Bruno: Fabulous under water. Nice samba. Went a bit weird at times and lost count.

Scores: 8, 7, 8 for a total of 23 – over scored, IMO. There was a lot of weird shit with that dance.

Numbers Update: Well, now we’re down to 9.9k votes between S__ and Karamo. There are 19.9k votes per million votes cast between S___ and Lauren, and 24.8k votes per million votes cast between S___ and Sailor/Kate.  Ally should be good as S___ would have to get close to 40k more votes per million votes cast to beat her.

Kel is up next and they’re making me hungry.  They are doing Jazz to High School Musical. Ugh.

He’s quite good. This is another dance that is in his wheelhouse. No obvious mistakes. Second or third instance tonight where the backup dancers have been more focused than the actual celeb. But he really did a great job with this dance.

Len: that was a dance that really suited you, well done.

Bruno: In the zone, top of the class. Keep that level in the other dances as well.

CAI: Led that number like the champ you are.

Agreed with all of that. Very good dance.

Scores: 9, 8, 9 for a total of 26 out of 30.

Hannah up next with Aladdin.  Did I get all the songs right? I think I might have. Nice opening. Love the dress. Nice rotations. Very pretty dance. Little rough in the one transition.  All in all a lovely dance. Ballroom suits her, I think.

Bruno: radiant. Magic carpet ride. Couldn’t see the footwork.

CAI: That was stunning. Amazing dance.

Len: Lovely dancer. Alan, this girl is fantastic in hold – needed more.

Why do they seem like they’re rushing but it seems like there is plenty of time. What else do they have planned?

Scores: 9, 7, 9 for a 25 out of 30.  Seriously Len?? The 7 is ridiculous. Scored lower than Sailor?

Numbers Update: Here’s where we stand with James still left to dance. Number on the right is how many votes per million SS would have to get to be safe over them. I think we’re going to be in for a shock. We’ll see.

Sean vs. Karamo 0.94% 9,434
Sean vs. Lauren 1.89% 18,868
Sean vs. Kate/Sailor 2.36% 23,585
Lamar vs. Hannah 2.83% 28,302
Lamar vs. Kel 3.30% 33,019
Sean vs. Ally 3.77% 37,736

Oy veh. James is the only dancer left and I have 15 minutes on the clock. Pirates of the Caribbean, Paso. I’m expecting all 9s.

He sure looks good. 🙂  That was a great dance. There was something strange about it, but I’m not sure I can say what. I enjoyed it and I fully expect him to get a great score.

CAI: Energy was off the charts. So dynamic. This was your dance.

Len: It was dramatic and strong, touch of aggression. Could have been sharper in some areas. Having said that, it was a great routine.

Bruno: Grand spectacle. A big hit.

Ya know, Len is a major pain in the ass, but they need to stop truncating him. Last week it was Leah and this week it was Tom. What is up with that?

Scores: 9, 8, 9 for a 26 out of 30.  Yeah, I agree with that. Don’t see a point difference between him and Emma, but I doubt it will make a difference in the long run. All in all, I think I agree with the scores tonight except I think they over scored SS a good bit which will likely come back to bite them. I don’t think Lauren had that great of a night, but she was certainly better than Sean.

Okay, so you were running short of time so you could have the stars talk about how they don’t want to go home yet? And a big retrospective? Since they aren’t getting a proper send off, I guess that’s got to be done. LOL to Kel’s donald duck imitation.

SAFE: EVERYBODY cuz nobody goes home on Disney Night. Your first clue should have been the credits rolling during  that first “who’s going to be safe” thing.

Okay, is that one or two double eliminations that will be coming in the next few weeks??